Catherine turned to me, her eyes wide as saucers. I was surprised by myself too. But maybe this is what it was all supposed to boil down to. Me giving up because I have felt like I tried enough. Me giving up because I know it's a dead end. Sometimes, the insecurity leaves, but then it's back with full force, because I dont get to hear the things I want to hear. Because I don't get to feel the things I want to feel. So this is probably me being a puny little wolf, running away from the only thing my heart has ever craved."What's that? My rightful place?" She asked, coming to stand in front of me.I shrugged. "I forgive you for everything. I mean, whatever you did with Lily, allowing yourself be manipulated like that. And now that I know you are not really at fault, I want to move away fron your path."She let her eyes sweep over me. "Are you saying this because you got tired of him?""Austin is not a man you can get tired of. You know that. The same way you can't force him to be with
Beta Liam walked behind me till we got to the house, then waited for me outside as I ran inside, checking my room. The paper was in the first drawer and I grabbed it and immediately ran back."Can we go?"He nodded. "I hope Alpha does not have my head."I have a small chuckle and we made our way to the pack house. It was a secluded area in the pack house and just outside the pack house sat Simon.He didn't look up at me or say a word, and I didn't bother with him either. He was probably too ashamed that all he got in exchnage for such a despicable act was a promise he knew could not be fulfilled, and he sold his morals to actually do it.Beta Liam took me to the large meeting room. It was silent, and the elders were laid back on their seats, pretty much like Alpha Austin. He was typing on his phone, while Lily sat alone on the other side of the table.No words were exchanged, but you could cut through the tension in the room with a scissors."Austin." I said once I came in.He turned
My eyes almost popped out of their sockets as Simon said it."What?" Even Austin sounded confused as he turned to me."She always knew the alpha would not harbor feelings for an ordinary omega. She was just a lucky woman who had become so involved with the alpha that when things went haywire with his mate, he chose her to run to. She knew that much." Simon said, pointing an accusing finger at me. In his eyes was a hollow depravement. He looked like he'd finally lost his soul and wasn't afraid to do just anything."Simon, what are you saying?" I asked, my body going numb."The truth. That's what you asked for, right? Then that's what you are going to hear."Austin walked to me and pulled me into him, turning my face away. "I have had enough.""No. No, you haven't. This Omega..she even killed her own mate! She killed her mate so that she could be with the alpha. She sums up various schemes to look vulnerable, including drowning herself on a path that only the alpha knew so that he would
Hie eyes went from surprised to disappointed to angry, then a sudden lack of emotions at all. We stayed there in the car, the dark clouds of rain looming over us, my thoughts conflicted."Hazel..." He said.His voice almost made me run back to him with my heart on my sleeve again, my body like an offering, my love like a sacrifice. But I needed to control. I needed to stop myself."Am I...just something you can give up on? Is that all I am to you?" He turned fully to me, his eyes wide with a slight sheen to them, and I could see his hands tremble slightly as he left the steering wheel. "No. That can't be...but...but you are...""But I am what, Hazel? What am I? If you are...just able to decide to let me go...is it that easy? Everything we have ever shared...Hell, the kisses, Hazel. Did you not feel me on your lips when you made that decision?"My eyes filled. I did. I felt him several times, all over me. I felt him every single place in me, most especially my heart but..."She is yo
I closed my eyes tight against the rain, my chest filling up with his closeness and the cold."Please?" he said again, his fingers slowly moving against my face, his breath ragged in my ear. "I..." I start to say. "I already talked to Catherine. I already told her to take her place back. I already admitted that your side just might not be the place I was born for, it might not be where I belong. She might...come back anytime. She might be here...and I have no right to ask you to reject her. I am not that heartless."I felt his grip on my face loosen a little, but then he was covering the last of the space I had unconsciously put between us, his hand slowly putting my hair behind my ears."How do I change your mind? Tell me everything you need to have and I will give it to you. Tell me everything you need to hear and I'll say it. Tell me everything you need to feel...and I'll make you feel it. Anything for you to stick by my side and forget the world like we've been doing for at least
"Austin? Austin?" I called, shaking him. He was rigid, and cold. A little too cold. I stood, pulling him up with me and not having the leisure to choose rooms, pulled him into mine, and tucked him under the sheets.I needed to warm him up, but how? I ran down to the kitchen immediately and started to heat some water. I ran around the house, locking doors and closing windows, then turned on the heaters.Ibwent uo to my room and he had gotten pale, too pale. His lips were slightly parted, and they were a little chapped. I ran down again, getting the now hot water and a dried towel. I slowly dabbed at it, ignoring the heat against my finger as I worked to rid him of his shirt.I propped him up, then made him lean on me, almost like he was hugging me but now quite.I swallowed and pulled the shirt off of him, then threw it to the side. I dabbed his back slowly with the hot towel, then his stomach, his arms, then his face.His body sure was alluring and I had to catch myself slacking on t
Slowly, I walked to the side of the bed, then put two fingers in front of his nostrils. The air intake was very minimal. I stood and removed the shirt I was wearing, then everything else, and wrapped a robe around myself.I slowly got into the bed with him, pulling him as close to me as I could. I could feel his cold engulf me, and I let out a small shiver. I wrapped my arms around him, baring him a little of the robe so that his shoulders were exposed. I saw the wound from burning off his tattoo of Catherine's name. It was dark, and a little wrinkled. I let my fingers graze it as I pulled the bedding around us and closed my eyes, hoping that the heat from my body would work enough to wake him.Time passed and I had no idea how long, and he still wasn't waking. At this point, I had no body heat as I was freezing myself, and I slowly turned over, letting him go. He had regained colour in his lip and cheeks, but was mostly still apart from that.It brought a ray of hope to me and I cov
"What?" I asked, my lips parting. "What did you say?"He swallowed, his hand still on my cheek. This time, he moved his fingers a little, and I felt the small caress right to the depths of my soul.He blinked slowly, then broke into a small smile. He looked weak and tired."I love you, Hazel. I am sorry." His slight grip around my face weakened, and I held on to his hand, my eyes filling with tears. He loves me. He said he loves me.My heart felt lke it was about to burst with maddening euphoria, and I leaned forward, letting my hands explore his body slightly as I did, then brought my hands back to cup his face.His eyes were closing slowly now, and the hand that had been on my cheek had fallen back onto the bed."Austin." I said, and his lashes fluttered. My chest felt warm, warmer than I had ever felt. I leaned forward and kissed his lips. His response was very weak, almost nonexistent, and I moved forward, kissing him like I owned the right to. Because maybe I did.I broke the ki
Austin's P.O.V.I took the remaining steps towards the large burial ground, the single rose I had plucked from my recent gardening hobby dangling from my fingers. I hated the amount of time it has taken me to come here, but at least I am making my way to her now, and I hope I let myself get to the very end.The grave was still new, and I found myself slowly kneeling toward it, and I dropped the single flower I'd brought. It will wilter and dry up, unlike my love for her. Unlike this undying love I still feel after so long.The headstone had only three letters written in cursive. "I love you."Nothing more. Because I had no words at all to say to her. In front of her, I am a sinner, and I will probably always be. I have no chance for forgiveness with her. She left, long ago, and in her wake a gaping hole.I let out a long sigh. If Hazel were here, she would have said I am a little too young to sigh like that. I smiled, shaking my head a little.I touched the grave again, my fingers sl
9 MONTHS LATERHow long can nine full months be? Probably a little too short when you are anticipating to die. But even shorter with a husband who dotes on you like Austin does.Austin received the congrats half heartedly, and brought in some of thbest healers across different packs to wait on me. Sometimes, I felt a little too protected, but I knew he just wanted to keep me safe.Everyday as I watched my pregnancy grow bigger, I felt the fear surge higher. How would things be for them after I die? Would Austin be able to look past my sacrifice and love the children because they belong to him? It sometimes made me wonder, but I also, learned to push it behind me.Sometimes, I caught him just spaced out a little, and sometimes after I slept, he would hold my hand and end up sleeping on a chair. He didn't seem to mind any of it at all, and didn't show me how worried he was also. For that, I was utterly grateful, more than he knew.I stood in front of the open door, watching the sunset.
The hall looked nothing like the unfinished one that Austin had shown me just yesterday, and I knew there was definitely no way it could have been done without having to pull all nighters.Dark red and black roses adorned a cleared path, and petals filled the floor I was supposed to walk on. Most of the pack were there, and in the front I could see Catherine, tears glistening brightly in her eyes, yet a small smile on her face.I smiled back at her as Austin slowly accompanied me, the train of my dress behind held up by an omega, and the scroll of the Luna's oath waiting on an elevated stand on which Austin would leave me to go to.He gave me a small reassuring smile as he left my side and then made his way to the stand, a happy smile playing on his lips.The standing ovation that had welcomed us was still ongoing, and Austin let it go on for a few more seconds, before he finally raised a hand and firmly clenched his fist. It immediately died down and he lowered his hand."It is an ho
We practiced a lot more, my feet slowly getting accustomed to the introductory steps of the dance while only barely escaping making mistakes towards the middle. I never did get too deep, as Austin just told me to focus on the beginning, and he will ensure we don't make a disaster at the end."Just go with my flow, okay?" he said to me and I ordered, allowing him to lead. It was rather convenient, and I found it easier.We retired to bed after a tired dinner, his hand clasped around my waist, drawing me into him, while his other hand stretched under my head to support it. Before I knew it, I was asleep, his slow, even breaths serving to lure me even deeper.I turned on to my back as the bright sunlight assaulted my eyes, then pulled a pillow over my head to shut it out completely. I didn't even care that Austin wasn't in bed, I just know I needed this sleep. "No, not that. I will inspect it myself in the next thirty minutes, so just move on to other things. Spotlight? Well, Hazel isn
I woke up with a start, feeling the empty bed around me. I had realized Austin wasn't anywhere near me when I stirred and for some reason it just scared the shit out of me. Maybe because things have been going a little too well and I am scared of anything jeopardizing it, or maybe I was having having bad dream."Hey. You are going to get a headache doing that." Austin said, walking over to where I sat. He held me in his arm, and scanned my face."You are here.""Of course, I was just on the phone with the gamma, I did not want to wake you up. Sorry if that startled you."I disentangled myself from him, leaned away and smiled, feeling my fears immediately drown. "No, I am fine. Maybe I was having a bad dream."He nodded. "I'm sorry."I smiled at him and leaned back on the bead headrest. "You know, I just realized...I never really asked what my duties as luna are."The slight furrow in his brows cleared off and he smiled. "Always so thoughtful. I believe during the crowning, you will ge
"This or this?" I asked Austin as we went over the dresses that were brought for the luna ceremony. He had commenced preparations immediately after, telling me how we needed to plan the world's best Luna ceremony in three days.The omegas waiting on me seemed to have an opinion, even as Austin thinned his eyes at the dresses."Why do you keep picking purple dresses? I think you look good in red." He said, his eyes slowly moving towards the red dress I have left on the bed."It's your favorite, Austin."He rolled his eyes and walked to me, then picked out the red dress. It was designed to hug my body from above, and then spread out into the tulles filled with satin towards the end.He put it in front of me, and then nodded. "I believe this will look good when you wear it.""Fine. I will try it on."He nodded and collected the other dresses, then gestured for the omega to leave. He turned away and closed his eyes as I wore the dress."I can't zip, Austin." I called out to him and he gav
I stirred a little and turned to the other side, and my eyes fell on Austin. He was sitting facing me, his elbow propped half on the headrest, his eyes fixed on me. My eyes slowly widened as I straightened."Are we here already?" I asked, my voice sleepy.He slowly nodded. "Yes.""You should have woken me up. You must have been tired from driving all day." I squinted my eyes at him. The sun was setting behind him, the sheen causing his hair to turn a golden brown, and make his red eyes a little lighter than they actually are.He smiled and extended his hand to me. "I thought you looked too pretty that way. I wouldn't mind waiting for you."I smiled, and he let go of my hand, then got out of the car. He went around to my seat and opened my door for me, and waited till I got out."Go on. I will bring in our stuff."I nodded and went in, my arms stretching on their own. My neck felt a little stiff, and once I made my way into the house, I found a couch to rest and I just went on it.When
I felt the entire world come to a stand still as the healer's words hit me again and again, like an ambush of arrows."Me...or the baby?" I asked, a little in a daze. It felt like I was in some faraway place, watching the girl who looked exactly like me sitting in front of the healer.I slowly turned to Austin whose eyes were wide and reddened. Unlike me, he seemed to clearly understand what the healer had said, and seemed to be trying to accept it too."What do you mean?" I asked, feeling hot tears sting the back of my eyes. I blinked rapidly, but it only made them rush down faster, and I felt the warmth on my cheeks."One of you will make it out of labor. It can't be both of you.""Is there no other way? Is there nothing? An offering? A sacrifice? A prayer?"I swallowed on hearing Austin's voice. He sounded just as broken as I was, and my chest filled up."None. That is what's written."Austin gave a slight pause. "What if she doesn't give birth?"I turned to him, my eyes wide. "No
I held Austin's arm tight as she took a step closer to me, and her eyes slowly drifted across to Austin. I turned instinctively to him, but his face was set in expressionless too, his hand holding my waist to keep me on my feet. Seeing him so determined gave me a big of confidence and I swallowed as I turned back to the healer."So she is the one. The substitute I have heard of.""Just check her, healer. Her status does not affect anything." Austin said, his voice cold.She flickered her eyes to him, then back at me. "All of that is good and all, but...do you not realize how powerful a mate bond is? How can an entire pack be so nonchalant towards a mate bond, especially that of the alpha? What were you thinking?"My breath hitched as her eyes thinned in a little judgemental look. I could tell she didn't have good news for us. My eyes lifted to Alpha Evander behind us. He looked a little disgusted too, like he absolutely didn't understand how Austin could disregard a mate bond to be wi