CHAPTER 1: A Mother's Love

ELOISE’S POV:

The sterile hospital room stands silent and still, its pale walls closing in on me. My trembling hands cling to the edge of the hospital bed, where my beloved child, Maddox, lies pale and fragile, like a delicate flower robbed of its vibrant bloom. Within this room, time has slowed, creating a sacred space where love and sorrow intertwine. 

I sit at my Maddox’s bedside, my heart aching due to our unfortunate circumstance. My Maddox’s tiny body is consumed by a relentless illness, a rare and deadly blood disease that no one, not even the experts, can name - a disease that he got because of my bullheadedness. Tubes and machines surround him, offering the only thread of hope for his life. 

The doctor said that my Maddox has a very low survival rate. Even so, as long as there’s still a possibility of him making it through, then I will continue to clutch to my remaining yet dwindling hope. I’ll keep on praying and believing that my Maddox will grow into a handsome, intelligent and responsible man. He’ll marry a great woman, then they’ll have children of their own. And… and…

I pause to let out a strained sigh.

What am I saying?!

My Maddox is just four. Instead of thinking about what will happen in the next twenty years or so, I need to focus on ‘now’. He needs to be saved ‘now’ first.

A tear, probably the millionth one I’ve shed since the world had taken the innocence out of my son, falls from one of my swollen eyes. Unsurprisingly, another one falls, then another… Until my shoulders uncontrollably jerk and my sobs rumble off the walls. 

Why? Why must my precious child endure such a cruel fate? Why him? Why not me? It’s my fault anyway. If only I can take his illness and all of his pains and put them on me, I will. I absolutely will!

My unanswered questions threaten to suffocate me as I wrestle with the unfairness of it all. My tears and my sobs persist to dominate me. I’m ready for them to last for hours, but I’m forced to grasp a little calmness when knocks suddenly come to the door. 

Dr. Tiu, a hematologist who has been taking care of my Maddox ever since his diagnosis, enters the small room, her face etched with both compassion and what appears to be an unbearable truth. She’s holding pieces of papers tightly in her hands. Her voice gentle yet unwavering, her eyes reflecting the depths of empathy. 

She says, "Ms. Garcia, I wish I could bring better news, but the truth is, your son’s illness is progressing rapidly, and our treatment options are almost exhausted."

My breath hitches, a silent plea escaping my lips. "Doctor, what else can we do? I can't bear the thought of losing my Maddox. Please."

Dr. Tiu’s eyes soften. “There’s one last thing I can think of that may save your son.”

“What is it?” I ask, feeling a spark of new hope in my chest.

“We can perform a bone marrow transplant,” she responds.

I don’t know what that is, but by the sound of it, it seems so complicated.

“Fine. If that’s what could save my Maddox, then I’m all for it. Just please, please, don’t let my son die. He’s all I have. I won’t be able to take it if I’m to… if I’m to…”

I stop my words while shrugging the undesirable thoughts off my aching head.

Dr. Tiu smiles very weakly, then says, “I understand. But first, we need to find a donor for your son.”

“I’ll be his donor. Just tell me what I need to do,” I say in a heartbeat.

“Let me set your proper expectations. Seventy percent of patients don't have a fully matched donor in their family. If you’re not a match, I can search the ‘Be The Match Registry’ to find a matched unrelated donor or cord blood unit for your son.”

Another uncertainty, huh.

That uncertainty pushes my already slumped shoulders further down.

“If I’m not a match, how easy can you find one?” I ask.

Dr. Tiu sucks in a breath, which only amplifies my distress. She then answers, “Your son’s case is one in a billion. He’s probably the only one in the world who has this uncommon DNA. Nobody in history has ever been recorded to have survived birth with the same DNA as his. It may be inappropriate to say this, but he’s very lucky to have the chance to experience life compared to the others.”

I know that Dr. Tiu doesn’t intend to offend me coz she doesn’t know about my past, but she just slaps on my face the harsh reality that my Maddox is dying because I fell in love with the wrong man. If only I didn’t allow myself to be entangled with a werewolf, none of this would have ever happened.

“We can test if you can be a donor for your son through a bone marrow aspiration. We need you to sign a consent form...”

I nod while murmuring, “Sure.”

“...and….”

I swallow hard as Dr. Tiu continues with a voice tinged with the sorrow of another unjust reality. 

“The bone marrow aspiration and the bone marrow transplant desperately need a fortune. Without the necessary funds, our hands are tied." 

My voice quivers when the question slips out of me. “How much will they cost?”

Dr. Tiu takes time in answering my question, seemingly not trusting that I may be able to afford whatever amount she’s talking about. After jerking her neatly worn eyeglasses, she answers, “An estimate of sixty thousand pesos for the aspiration and another two million for the transplant.”

Oh my goodness! Where am I gonna get that huge amount of money?! I’m already swamped with debts! I can barely buy all my Maddox’s medical needs, I haven’t paid our rent for six months and now this?! 

I put my fingers on my forehead to massage it, while reminding myself that this hospital has social services. They may be able to offer financial assistance or guide me towards charitable organizations that could help. Still, some concerns linger in my head: even though I may be able to collect donations, I just don’t know if the donations will be enough to cover my Maddox’s much-needed surgery. And if miraculously they become enough, how long till that happens? Can my Maddox hold on to his illness until then? 

My heart sinks, my hopes colliding with the harsh walls of another despair. Then my gaze falls upon my Maddox’s frail form, his innocent face has a quiet serenity that belies the battle raging in him. 

How can I bear witness to my child's suffering, knowing that the remedy lies just beyond my reach? Helplessness gnaws at my soul, whispering echoes of self-doubt and fear.

Dr. Tiu, knowing that she’s powerless to help me about my finances, leaves the room without another word, not even encouragement or anything to make me feel a little less distressed. 

While I’m grappling against my thoughts, my Maddox’s voice slithers through the hum of the life-saving machines and temporarily pushes my unwanted thoughts aside.

“Mama,” he says, slowly opening his eyes.

I get up from the chair to walk closer to him. A forced smile emerges from my lips next, hoping it’s enough to hide my agony, but it doesn’t. My Maddox carefully studies my face, my eyes in particular.

He says, “Mama cried again.”

I open my mouth to say ‘I didn’t’, but for an unexplained reason, before a word can get out of me, I purse my lips tightly. Gazing into my Maddox’s eyes, clouded with pain yet brimming with resilience, the determination to save and protect him continues to ignite within me. 

I can’t show weakness to my Maddox! I need to be stronger than this!

With every ounce of strength I possess, I resolve to become my Maddox’s unwavering advocate, challenging the world’s cruel decree.

“Don’t worry about mama. Mama is strong. That’s why Maddox should be strong too, so we can play the whole day, every day even,” I say as I caress his pale face.

“Play… Maddox play with mama again,” he says, gently smiling and softly giggling.

His innocence about our cruel fate is the solace I desperately need. 

I lean closer to him, our breaths mingling in the space between us. With a voice overflowing with tenderness and a heart with unconditional love, I whisper the words, "I love you, my precious Maddox."

“Love you too, mama,” he says, before closing his eyes and several minutes later, falling asleep again.

I head out of his room and walk my way into the labyrinth of the hospital’s corridor. For a moment, I forget why I have to leave him. I just keep on walking without a distinct destination until I find myself in the hospital’s lobby. I stand and look around for a while without really knowing what I’m searching for. Then I slap my hand on my forehead, before shaking my head in frustration.

Get it together, Eloise! You just promised yourself that you’ll be strong for your son! How dare you quickly abandon that promise?!

I draw out a stiff breath and comb my loose bangs out of my face with my fingers.

I can’t leave my Maddox for too long. I should head back now. Maybe if I go back to my Maddox’s room, I’ll remember what I have to do.

As I turn my heels around ready to leave the lobby, a very familiar voice, which I avoid hearing for years, suddenly reaches my ears. With reluctance, I angle my sight to where the voice is coming from - a large TV screen mounting at the wall with some distance opposite to me. There on the screen is a well-built, handsome man, dressed in a patterned three-piece, business suit with a face that greatly resembles my Maddox’s. Seeing him makes me remember why I have to shortly leave my Maddox - to look for this hospital’s social services department. Without ado, the charitable organization where we first met, the one he founded himself crosses my mind next.

I stand frozen, my heart pounding, my pulse quickening. The mere thought of reuniting with the one who may hold the key to my Maddox’s survival makes me wonder if fate is weaving its intricate threads to bring us closer again.