Chapter Twelve

Karen’s Pov

I won’t.

The words slammed into me like a crashing wave, leaving me breathless. My mind went blank, and for a moment, I wasn’t sure if I’d heard him correctly. My father’s voice broke the silence, sharp and demanding. “What did you just say?”

Ryan didn’t hesitate, his tone steady and unyielding. “I said I won’t.”

I sat frozen in my chair, unable to process the conversation unfolding before me. My father’s face turned red with fury, but Ryan’s calm demeanor only made the tension thicker.

“I think we’ve had enough for tonight,” Ryan said, standing up abruptly. “Thank you for dinner, but I’ll take my leave now.”

With that, he walked away, leaving me sitting there with my parents. My mother’s eyes softened with pity as she reached out to touch my hand, but I pulled away, unable to bear the look on her face. My father muttered something under his breath, clearly enraged, but I couldn’t focus on his words. All I could hear was Ryan’s voice echoing in my mind: “I won’t.”

I felt like my world was crumbling. I couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think. Why? Why couldn’t he love me? Why couldn’t he see how much I’ve done, how much I’ve sacrificed for him?

Before I realized it, my legs were moving. I left the dining room, ignoring my parents’ concerned calls, and followed Ryan. My heart pounded as I climbed the stairs to his room. When I reached his door, I hesitated for a moment, my hand trembling as I knocked.

“What?” Ryan’s voice was curt, but I pushed the door open anyway.

He was standing by the window, his broad shoulders tense, his hands shoved into his pockets. He didn’t look at me as I stepped inside.

“What do you mean by that?” I demanded, my voice breaking. “How can you just keep me in the dark all this time and then say that you won’t marry me? What is that supposed to mean?”

Ryan finally turned to face me, his eyes cold and unreadable. “Karen, we’ve talked about this before. I’ve told you time and again… I wanted you to be the one to leave. I never wanted to be the one to say it.”

Tears welled up in my eyes as his words sank in. “I… I’m never going to leave you, Ryan. Never.” My voice cracked, but I didn’t care. “Because I know there’s something here. There’s a chance for us. I believe that. I know we can make this work.”

Ryan sighed, running a hand through his hair. “Karen…”

I stepped closer, my hands trembling. “Please, Ryan. I love you. I… I’m not giving up on us. Not now, not ever.”

For a moment, he said nothing. The silence stretched between us, heavy and suffocating. Then, without a word, I hugged him. I wrapped my arms around him, holding him tightly as if that could make him stay, make him see. His body stiffened, but he didn’t push me away.

When I finally let go, I turned and left the room, my tears streaming down my face. As I walked down the hallway, I heard whispers from the maids. “Poor girl,” one murmured. “She’ll never be Luna.”

My wolf, Draya, growled in my mind, her voice filled with anger. “How dare they speak about their future Luna like that?”

But I ignored her. I was too tired, too broken to care. By the time I reached my room, I was sobbing uncontrollably. I collapsed onto my bed, burying my face in the pillow as the pain consumed me.

I cried until there were no tears left, until I was empty and hollow. When I finally sat up, my eyes were swollen, my chest aching. I reached for my diary, the one place where I could pour out my heart without fear of judgment.

The memories of my first mate, Asher, surfaced, unbidden but familiar. He was my everything once, a part of me I thought I could never replace. His smile, his laugh, the way he whispered my name as if it were a secret meant only for him. We were perfect together until the war ripped him away, leaving me broken and empty.

For so long, I clung to the remnants of that love, grieving a bond that could never be restored. But life had given me a second chance—Ryan. Despite his cold demeanor and resistance, I felt it in my bones. A bond, faint but undeniable. He might not see it now, but I do.

I’ve lost love once before. I won’t let it happen again. I’ll fight for this, for us. Even if it means tearing down the walls he’s built around his heart, brick by brick. Because losing him would mean losing myself again, and that’s a pain I’m not willing to endure twice.

Wiping the last of my tears, I reached for my diary. Scribbling furiously, I vowed to make this work, no matter what it took.

*Dear Diary,*

*Why? Why does he hate me so much? What did I do to deserve this? I’ve given him everything, yet it’s never enough. I don’t understand. But I won’t give up. I can’t. I love him, and I’ll find a way to make him love me back.*

When I finished writing, I stared at the page, the words blurring through my tears. My phone buzzed on the nightstand, and I reached for it, desperate for a distraction. It was Tania, my best friend.

“Karen, what’s wrong?” she asked as soon as I answered.

Her voice was comforting, and I felt a fresh wave of tears threatening to spill. “It’s Ryan,” I whispered. “He… he said he won’t marry me.”

Tania sighed, her tone sympathetic. “Karen, you need to take a step back. Come stay with me for a while. You need to clear your head and focus on yourself. Being around him right now isn’t good for you.”

I hesitated, her words sinking in. She was right. I needed space, time to figure out what to do next.

“Okay,” I said finally. “I’ll come.”

But even as I agreed, a part of me was already planning my return. I would go to Tania’s, yes, but only to gather my strength. Because when I came back, I would fight for Ryan. I would fight for our future.

He might not see it yet, but we were meant to be. And I wasn’t going to let him go without a fight. I won’t lose him as I lost my first mate, Asher.