Chapter 6: A Secret to Keep

Chapter 6: A Secret to Keep

Kayleigh

What an eventful day! It’s only been day one and yet so much stuff has happened already. Andrei is a gypsy wolf. Wow. That discovery tops all of today’s events. I’m still coming to terms with the fact that Andrei could possibly be a vicious wolf. Not that I’m scared—I will never be scared of him. But I have mixed feelings. Learning about Andrei being a gypsy wolf is shocking, yeah, but also there’s this trace of pity that I feel for him. No, I don’t pity him for being a gypsy wolf. But because he has to hide that from people. He can’t really live his most authentic self out in the open. It doesn’t matter if he comes from one of the most powerful werewolf families, the truth of the matter is he has to keep hidden what he truly is if he wants to be safe.

Just a few years ago, back in Ireland, I remember the wolf-blood council sending out The Guardians, their elite enforcers, to hunt a group of gypsy wolves. The gypsy wolves were not rogue by any means, they were living peacefully in the countryside. But the wolf-blood council did not know what kind of strength or special attributes gypsy wolves wield. They were intimidated by them, but equally fascinated as well if I’m being honest. The council couldn’t risk having wolves that they cannot control or could potentially be stronger than the strongest among the wolf-bloods. So they had to eliminate them.

My stomach dips in the realization that Andrei will never be safe if word gets out about him being a gypsy wolf. He was able to call his cousins from one of the packs here in Missouri earlier. Andrei’s uncle, who is also a pack Alpha, sent out some of his men to find those rogue wolves we met at the gas station and do “damage control”.

I’m not sure if it means they’ll have to bribe those men to keep their mouths shut, or to kill them so there’ll be no risk of spreading about the gypsy wolf who’s in Missouri right now. Growing up in a werewolf family, the thought of those rogue wolves getting killed doesn’t even faze me. It’s a necessary evil. If it needs to happen to keep Andrei protected, I’m all for it.

My heart breaks for Andrei. He’s been living with his secret for—wait, did he know that he’d have a gypsy wolf? Is his mom a gypsy wolf, too? I’m keeping a mental note to ask him more about the nature of his wolf tomorrow.

I hear a slight tap on my door.

            TAP. TAP. TAP.

            Maybe it isn’t on my door.

            The slight tap turns in a full-blown knock.

            KNOCK, KNOCK.

            Hmm. Probably Cillian. In that case, I’ll just ignore it.

            KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK!

            Definitely Cillian!

            Not wanting to wake the entire house, I make my way to open the door. Reluctantly, of course.

            Sure enough, it’s the Blue Blood Pack’s arrogant Alpha heir.

            I can’t hide the fact that Cillian has this irresistible nature. Even in the dark hallway lit by dimmed lamps, his handsome face is hard to ignore. It must be part of his Alpha aura. I don’t know for sure since I don’t have a wolf that can confirm that theory. I just heard about Alphas having the capability to use their “Alpha aura” to charm their way into getting what they want, manipulating others to do whatever they’d want to be done.

            “What now, Cillian? If you’re looking for an ice-pack for your sore jewels, head to the kitchen downstairs, not here.” I whisper-yell at him. But I must admit I’m also holding myself together, not wanting to break into laughter, realizing how hilarious he looked after my martial arts exhibit at the ranch.

“Wow. First of all, don’t call them ‘jewels’—it’s bad enough you kneed them savagely to the point that I felt like they bounced around in the insides of my body. Calling them ‘jewels’ is emasculating.”

            “Okay, not jewels. Your… eggs… or nuggets… or nibblets…” I press my lips together, not wanting to chuckle.

            “What are you, five? They’re called tes—”

            “Eww, stop, stop! You’re so vulgar!” I don’t let him finish his sentence.

He pushes his way inside my room and closes the door behind him.

            “What do think you’re doing? You can’t be in here. Get out of my room!”

            “No. I’m not going anywhere until we talk. I’ve tried the polite way of asking you to spare your precious time for me. But you won’t. So here I am. And if you still refuse to talk to me, I’ll make sure that everyone—in Missouri, in Ireland, around the world, and especially the wolf-blood council—will know about Andrei’s secret.”

            “You know about Andrei?” I gasp, not believing what I just heard. If Cillian knows, who else does? Kinsley?

            “Of course. I know everything that goes on around my territory, and in the surrounding cities and towns.”

            “You’re bluffing. You’re lying, aren’t you?” A hint of hope coats my whisper.

            “Now, why would I bluff or lie about knowing that he’s a gypsy wolf?” Grinning, he saunters over to my bed and sits.

            “What? How did you know? Get up! Don’t park your tush on my bed!”

            His gaze travels all over my body. Remembering that I’m only wearing a pair of silk pajama shorts and a silk blouse I wrap my arms around my torso, feeling exposed. Suddenly I feel naked, uncomfortable, and nervous. All at once. But I also sense a slight feeling of exhilaration seeing Cillian again. I don’t know why. Did I ever mention he incites confusing emotions in me? Well, exhibit A.

            “I have my ways,” he states—with a smug look on his face, of course. And still not leaving my bed. 

            “You had me followed?” Realizing that someone else might have seen Andrei in his partial shifting, my heart races.

            “What do you think I am? An amateur?” He motions for me to sit next to him. Which I ignore.

            “You couldn’t have followed us… I would have seen your SUV…” I’m digging back in my memory of today’s drive to the gas station and back to the ranch. I would remember spotting his SUV. Not that I was on the lookout for him in particular, like Andrei pointed out.

            “How would you know? You were so busy flirting and giggling with that mutt to notice if you were being followed.”

            “Really, Kill? Still with the name-calling? Well, I guess if you saw me “flirting and giggling” with Andrei, did you also enjoy watching me make out with him?” I watch him react to my lie, hoping his jealousy will give away how he found out about Andrei’s secret.

            His jaw ticks. He cracks his neck. Then his knuckles. He inhales a lungful of air and stares into my eyes. He remains sitting on my bed, like he belongs there. If his intention is to make me feel uncomfortable and regret what I just said by the way his eyes hold mine, then he wins. I regret lying about making out with Andrei.

            Before he does something crazy, like go tell the world that Andrei is a gypsy wolf—or kiss me, or walk out—I move to the bed and sit next to him, sideways, facing him.

            “Kill, tell me, how did you find out about Andrei’s… you know…?” I grit my teeth. I’m feeling protective of my Russian friend right now and want to lash out at Cillian, but I don’t. I’m worried what he’d do about the information he just unearthed.

            “That’s for me to know, and for you to… keep wondering about.”

            Grasping the fact that I’m not getting anything out of him, I get up and pull him towards the door. “Okay, then. Social call is done. If you’re not telling me anything, you might as well leave. We have an early day tomorrow. I need my beauty sleep.”

            “Wait, what? We didn’t even have our talk.”

            “Well, forget about that talk now. Leave my room.”

            “Sure, let me just go ahead and make a phone call to the wolf-blood council. My uncle is one of the board members. I’m sure they’re going to have fun finding out about the gypsy wolf roaming freely in our territory.” Without waiting for my response, he reaches for the doorknob.

            “Wait, Kill!” I thrust him aside and use my body to barricade his way out of the room. Putting myself between him and the door, I raise both hands to show him that I’m ready to talk, “Tell me, what do you want, Kill?”

            “What I want is so simple, Kayleigh.”

            “Tell me, then. What is it you want?”

            “You.”

            “I’m here, Kill. Be specific.” Swallowing hard, I utter those words softly. 

            “I. WANT. YOU.” He steps towards me, and I step back. My brain is already familiar with the adrenaline rush that my body goes through when Cillian is around my breathing area.

            My back hits the door—or the wall. I don’t know anymore. Cillian has a way of making me forget about everything around me and only hyper focus on him. “What does that even mean, Cillian?”

            “I want you for myself. To do everything I ask of you. To follow every single thing I tell you to do. To give me all I ask from you. To be mine. And mine alone.”

            “What? You’re crazy! I can’t do that—you can’t do that!” I’m frantic. How could he ask something like this?

            “I sure can.” The tip of his nose is nestling on the crook of my neck. When he speaks, the air from his mouth tickles a little. He nibbles a small part of my skin with his lips, making my body shudder in excitement. This feelings are still new to me. I’m not used to them. But I don’t move away.

            “I’m tired of you choosing Andrei all the time. Always leaving with him. Always touching him. Always feeling bad for him. And now you’re protecting him, too. I’m sick and tired of that!” He lifts his head and makes eye contact with me as he spits out his contempt against Andrei.

            “You’re one to talk. You’re always doing stuff that’s so confusing. Kissing me, getting jealous of Andrei, telling me what to do… On top of that there’s the Kinsley factor.” I arch an eyebrow and cross my arms on my chest.

            “So?” Why is he so arrogant? He continues to gaze at me like I’m the one who said something foolish.

            “So?! Why are you acting all crazy like that when I’m not even your girlfriend? Kinsley is your girlfriend!” I’m so annoyed that he’s not even denying about Kinsley being his girlfriend. I mean, is she? They’re always together. And if she is, why is she okay that Cillian is always going all caveman on me? Maybe they have an open relationship? Yuck.

            A grin flits across his lips. “You look so cute when you’re mad,” he says, and tucks a wisp of hair behind my ear. His wolf eyes are sparkling. I’m getting lost in those eyes, again. If Cillian is attractive just in human form, he is lethally attractive when his wolf comes forward. Looking at his wolf eyes stirs a different level of delight to me.

            Those eyes are like magnets. They call to me. I will myself to look away so I can focus on what I want to tell him.

            “I’m still so confused about everything, Cillian. You haven’t said anything to me in a year. Those prank calls don’t count. I knew it was you on the other line. After our first kiss—MY first kiss—you just ghosted me. Then my first day here in Missouri, you kiss me and just walk out on me. Now you’re asking me to be yours all while clearly already having a certain pretty girl with you all day long. So convenient.”

            His grin turns into a full smile now.

            “What are you smiling about, you big alpha-hole!”

            “Are you jealous of Kinsley?” He tips my chin up so he can hold my stare.

            “Bloody hell, no. Why would I be? I’m just appalled by your tenacity, asking me to be yours all while being with Kinsley!”

            “I’m not asking you to be mine. I’m telling you you’re mine. Don’t worry about Kinsley.” As much as I admire his confidence, I’m also repulsed. And offended.

            “Oh, I’m not worried about Kinsley. I’m not even worried about you. Whatever power you think you have over me, I’m pretty sure Andrei can one-up you. So I sugge—”

            I don’t get to finish what I’m saying when soft lips come crashing onto mine. Hot, pillowy lips teasing and tasting my mouth. I didn’t mean to throw Andrei in that last sentence but I’m getting irritated and vexed about the idea of Kinsley being Cillian’s girlfriend. I know, I’m vile for using Andrei to get even and rile Cillian up. But I was out of ammo.

            “Whatever it is you have going on with Andrei, put an end to it before I do,” he mumbles in between our kiss.

            That’s what did it for me. I can’t let him threaten my friendship with Andrei. Andrei needs me right now, more than ever. I cannot just abandon him just because Cillian says so.

            I jerk away from him and slide out from his hold.

            “No. I cannot just stop talking to Andrei, Kill. He is my friend. I can’t cut ties with him just because you ask me to.”

            I’m ready to hear an earful from him, but his phone alarm goes off.

            “Shit. I’ve got pack run in three hours, but I have to go round up my guys now. We’ll talk more tomorrow. You get some sleep, okay?” He leans toward me, like expecting a heartfelt goodbye kiss.

            So I cover my mouth with both hands. “No, Cillian. Did you hear me? I can’t just cut ties with Andrei.”

            “We’ll talk about it later. Give me a kiss, Kayleigh. Don’t put me in a bad mood.”

            Getting how much he wants the kiss I lure him closer to the door, a bait he easily takes. As soon as he leans in to kiss me again I slide to his side, open the door, push him into the hallway, and lock the door behind me. All of that probably took less than two seconds.

            “Kayleigh! What the— Open this door now! I’m gonna be in a fucking bad mood the whole day.”

            KNOCK. KNOCK.

            “You’ll wake the whole house, Cillian! Go get a kiss from your girlfriend!” I whisper-yell through the door.

            “You’re such a brat, Kayleigh!” A pang of jealousy hits me when he still doesn’t say otherwise regarding my accusations about him and Kinsley.

            “Kill…”

            “Yeah?”

            “I can’t just cut ties with Andrei.”

            “Well, you leave me with no choice, then…”

            “What now? What are you going to do?”

            “My Plan B.”

            “What’s Plan B?”

            Dead silence.

            “Cillian, what is Plan B?”

            When I don’t hear any reply after several seconds I open the door, to find no one in the hallway. Alpha-hole is gone.

            What the heck is Plan B?

            Did I just put Andrei’s life in danger?

            With a heavy heart, I go to bed. I straighten the pillows and get under the covers. I’m about ready to close my eyes when I see my phone blink, notifying me of a text message.

UNKNOWN NUMBER: Get some sleep, Ireland. You’ll need all your energy for PLAN B.

            Only one person calls me Ireland. So I immediately edit the contact info and add a name for the unknown number.

ME: What is Plan B?

ALPHA-HOLE: …

ME: Kill! What is Plan B?

ALPHA-HOLE: Just wait and see.

ME: Don’t hurt Andrei… please.

ALPHA-HOLE: Just because you said that, I’ll make sure I do.

ME: Kill, I’ll do anything you want. Just leave him alone.

ALPHA-HOLE: I’ll think about it.

            We were taught at werewolf conferences to never, ever negotiate with an enemy. Never succumb to extortion. Never put your dignity on the line of war just to win a battle. But yet here I am, doing all that I’m not supposed to do.

            I can’t help but wonder, maybe if I have a wolf it will be easier to hold myself together. If I have a wolf, maybe it will be easier to resist Cillian. If I have a wolf, maybe I can protect Andrei.

            If only.

            Two weeks till I turn 18.

Moon Goddess, will you be sending me my wolf soon?

            I’m ready.

            Any time now.

            Please?

            My phone blinks again with another message. But it isn’t from alpha-hole this time.

ANDREI XOXO: Heading out for the Alpha run in a few. If you’re sleeping, hope you dream of sweet things, me included.

ME: Thanks. About to zzz. Be careful out there.

ANDREI XOXO: For you, always. XO

ME: …

ANDREI XOXO: I don’t get an XO this time? Is it because of today?

ME: Not at all. I was just fixing my hair. XOXOXOXO

            I did hesitate. Guilty feelings are new to me. It’s not a pleasant feeling, let me tell you.

            Oh, Moon Goddess. I know, I know. Lip-locking with Cillian just moments ago and now flirting with Andrei via text. I’m playing with fire. No, I’m playing with the hearts of two Alpha heirs.

            Stick a silver fork in me now, I’m done.

            I’m going to hell.