Chapter 3

Ellie

“Please don’t run away from me. Please, Daddy, don't leave me with her!”

I jolted awake, my heart pounding like a drum in the silence of the night. My wide-eyed gaze scanned the darkness of my room as I forced my breathing and heartbeat to align.

The face of my 6-year-old self remained photographed in my mind. I couldn’t shake away her teary eyes and bruised body as she ran after her father, stopping only to watch as he drove further away from the house, leaving her with Satan herself.

A part of me still resent my father for abandoning me that day with her. He eventually came back after a week but that look of horror on his face, him getting his keys, him yelling at my mother asking her how she could do something like that to me, me thinking all the torture was finally over, me thinking he would save me, only for him to drive off and leave me with her with no explanation, it all remained photographed in my mind.

There was no “I’m coming back”, or “I’m taking her with me”, he just left.

“Hey, are you okay?” a sudden voice pierced through the quiet, startling me.

It was Aiden, his big frame leaning on my door. I hadn’t even noticed when he came in. “You were talking in your sleep. My room is next door and the walls are fucking thin.”

He sat softly on the edge of my bed. I turned on the lights to see he was shirtless, his hair was ruffled and with dark and tired eyes, he leaned closer to me.

“Are you okay Ellie?” his voice softened and he placed a hand on my thigh sending uncontrollable chills down my spine.

“Yeah it was just a nightmare,” I said, brushing his hand off before getting up. He let out a heavy sigh before putting his hand in his pocket and pulling out a cigarette and a lighter.

“You keep cigarettes in your pockets when you’re sleeping?”

“I forgot it there, okay? Let’s go to the balcony.”

He lit the cigarette and passed it to me. I didn’t smoke, but I also didn’t want to turn it down.

Under the cool night, there was a comforting relief on the balcony, each rhythmic inhale of the cigarette syncing with the peaceful quietude. I passed the cigarette to him.

“So what’s the story?” He said after taking a drag.

“What do you mean?”

“Your nightmare, you, your dad. What’s your story?”

A heavy weight rested on my shoulder as my eyes continued to lock on the night sky.

“My mum wasn’t the best person...” I contemplated whether to tell him or not, but then again, who would he tell? Plus, I highly doubted Aiden gave a crap about my past.

“She was a meth addict and she used to hit me.” The words spilled out faster than my brain could keep up with.

Aiden choked on his drag before looking at me with widened eyes. “You look surprised,” I said with a chuckle before taking the cigarette from him.

“No shit I’m surprised.”

“You shouldn’t be. We lived in the worst part of Coney Island. Half of the people there are addicts and hate whatever kids they have. CPS is sick and tired of Coney Island at this point.”

“Yeah, but still. Did your dad hit you too?”

“No. He was always busy with work. He had to work 3 jobs to put food on the table so he was barely home. He didn’t even know about my mum’s addiction at first.”

“How’d he find out?”

I placed my feet up on the table and turned my gaze to him.

“He found the bruises on me when I was 7. He and my mum got into this huge fight and he...left.”

His already widened eyes grew larger. “He left you? That’s fucked up.” That question panged my heart. Hearing it from another person hurt more for some reason.

“Only for a week though. He and my mum got into a huge fight again when he came back. She started screaming that she wouldn’t let him take me away. She...um..she grabbed a knife, and yeah...”

“Anyways, the cops came before she could hurt us, and they sent her to jail. I haven’t heard from her since.”

I took a deep drag of the shortened cigarette. Aiden sat up and took it from me.

“Is that what your dream was about?” I nodded as I sunk into the chair. This level of vulnerability was making my body quiver, and all I wanted to do was disappear.

“Yeah.”

The silence between us grew uncomfortably thick, each passing moment adding weight to the awkwardness. Sensing the tension, Aiden reached out, placing a hand on my thigh I guess in an attempt to soothe me.

As our eyes held an electric gaze, I sensed a shift in the air. Aiden must have felt it too because he lifted his hand from my thigh to my face, moving my curls behind my ear. His fingers stroked my cheeks softly.

“Aiden...what are you-

His gaze fell to my lips as he used his thumb to draw on the corner of my mouth.

His lips connected to mine softly, and they melted together – soft and easy, like a slow dance. It was a gentle kiss, the kind that spoke volumes without saying a word.

But it was with him. Why did I let him kiss me?

“Why’d you do that?” I whispered as our lips parted away.

“I’m sorry,” he said softly, his eyes still in a daze. I could feel his warm breath on my face, and all I wanted was for him to close the gap again.

“It’s okay.” His finger brushed over my lips again before he stood up.

“Um... I should get going.” I nodded, and with that, he was gone.

***

The party was a chaotic explosion. Jason Bridger’s father owned one of the elite clubs in Manhattan, and I guess with a “please daddy” he could always have his parties here.

Hot sweaty bodies swayed on the dance floor, laughter echoed through the air, and the scent of booze lingered strongly in the air. As I made my way through the dance floor with Jasmine and Ana behind me, I questioned why I came here in the first place. I should have listened to Aiden.

Speaking of Aiden, we barely spoke after our kiss last night. God, I needed to talk to him, but I also never wanted to see him again.

Who the fuck kisses their stepbrother?!

“Girl you need to loosen up,” Jasmine said. She yelled a bit since the music was deafening.

“Is it that obvious?” I asked.

“Yeah, your face is all scrunched up, what’s going on?”

I wanted nothing more than to tell her that I kissed Aiden, to gush about how it made me feel, about how his lips were so soft and so gentle that it made my stomach pool with butterflies, but I couldn’t.

No one could ever know, they’d think we were little incest babies. Like c’mon, he wasn’t my brother, we weren’t actually related.

“I just need to use the bathroom.” I lied before surfing my way through the crowd to the girl's bathroom, only to find a long ass line.

“Hey princess.” a voice echoed behind me.

“Aiden I told you to

But it wasn’t Aiden, it was Ander. His tall inebriated frame towered over me as he swayed around.

“Looking... for Aiden?” His voice slurred.

“Uh...no but have you seen him?”

“Yeah, follow me.”

We walked slowly through the club until we got further and further away from everyone else.

The music drowned out and I could barely make up the figures of everyone in the club. “Hey, Ander...are you sure Aiden’s here?”

The air thickened as he cornered me, his body drawing closer to me. The heavy aroma of booze clung to Ander like an invisible cloak, a potent blend of whiskey and hard gin.

“You’re Aiden’s little princess.” He used his finger to stroke my cheek in a way that made me quiver for all the wrong reasons.

“Why don’t you and I have a little fun Ellie?” his grip on my waist tightened as he pushed my body further into the wall.

“Ander...stop.”

Panic equally tightened its grip on me, each unsteady heartbeat a drumroll of apprehension. As he pushed his body firmly to mine, I fought to steady my breathing. Without saying a word, he laid slobbering kisses on my face and neck. I wanted to fight, to push him, and kick him away but my body worked against me.

The club became muted with distant echoes and the pulsating lights grew dimmer and dimmer. It was like I watched him from a foggy distance, disconnecting from my reality.

No, no, no, no, please stop.

Please.