Bip...bip...bip...
That sound.
Bip...bip...bip...
That annoying sound.
I hated that sound.
It rang inside my head like a church bell, making it ache and throb; excruciatingly.
I wanted to beat hell out of whoever or whatever was making that dead annoying sound.
It continued,
Bip...bip...bip...
How bad was it that I heard that sound and wished it wasn't my heart beating on a life support machine, but a cherubim choir, or a heavenly instrument; hell, I wished it was even the devil's trumpet. I wished it to be anything but what it actually was.
How disappointing.
I woke up and felt my body aching all over, strained to one position and laid down horizontally on a soft all white ned; that annoying bipping sound still making my head throb.
Why was death so damn uncomfortable? I asked myself. Hopefully I was dead. But how long till I got to see my family then?
The ache I felt all over made it more difficult for me to think about if I really was dead or not. I tried fighting the urge to push open my eyes for fear of being disappointed. But they itched to be opened and resistance was not favouring me.
I could have still been alive.
"Mara! Mara can you hear me?" I heard a voice calling.
Was I in the land of the dead? Was that my mother? Or sister?
Of course I could hear them but why could I? It is supposed to be an endless pit of emptiness; death was suppose to be less painful and uncomfortable. Why the heck then was there a voice in it? An unsettling voice for that matter.
"Mara!" the next voice I heard, the voice followed was familiar; very familiar if you asked me.
Issa!
Of course she was here; and I wasn't dead; neither was I ready to face her judging eyes. I wanted to open my eyes, look around and find myself in that place people go to when they die, but life's disappointment had sealed its fate with me and my expectations were never met.
"Maraïda Elina Mendoza! I know you can hear me! Just please open your eyes and tell me you're OK." I could feel the agony in voice. I could feel the pain in her words, the tears in her hoarse voice. But I couldn't bring myself to regret anything. I hadn't intentionally jumped inside the highway to be knocked out by a running vehicle: but I still didn't regret it. It was an epic fail but still, no regrets.
Although the feelings in me were all practically dead, in my mind I knew I had to feel sorry for Issa, she was the last person by my side who still cared and felt sorry for me.
I opened my eyes and the flash of light stung a little. The harsh brightness forced me to shut them back tight. A few blinks, retries and I could finally keep them open. I looked around and it was confirmed,
I was in a hospital. Not heaven! Not hell! Not even the in between. Damn it!
Issa's eyes were swollen and her face all red. For a split second I thought a part of me that could no longer feel felt pity and remorse. I felt hurt, a little, but not enough to want to feel sorry for myself.
First things first, I scanned my surrounding. A doctor stood literally in my face, by his side was another man, a male nurse. On the other side was my dear Issa; looking like a bereaved widow. But apart from them, no other person.
But I remembered a man, that man. That same man from that night. His face, his voice, his touch!
Where was he?
He was there in the city, he was there!
I was sure.
Maybe he was just a nightmare afterall, or a bad fantasy; a nightmare I had in my subconscious while I strode the streets like I owned them.
Or maybe it was as a result of the accident. Maybe it was all my mind's trick on me and I was only hallucinating. Maybe he wasn't even real,
"What happened?" I asked in my croaky voice. I remembered the accident, but I just wanted to be sure the rest of what happened before it was my illusion.
"You were involved in an accident Miss Mendoza. You're lucky to be alive after such a hit." The doctor said. He was tall, lean, with freckles scattered all across his face. His brunette brown curls framing his face perfectly.
Lucky me!
"Mara, are you OK?" Issa asked.
"She'll be fine miss Isadora. She just needs to rest. You need no longer worry." Dr. Seuss as I read on his name tag said. He left with the nurse following closely behind.
"How did I get here? Who brought me here?" I needed to be sure he was just a bad memory stuck in my head. But then again, I felt he had been too real to be my imagination. As crazy as I was getting, I could still make a difference between real and imaginary; somehow.
"I got a call that you were here. I came as soon as I heard. Please tell me you didn't do this to yourself on purpose. It was as it is supposed to be, just an accident. Right Mara?" her voice was dry and hoarse as she spoke.
"Does it matter? Am here already. And you heard the freckled guy, I'll be fine. But how did I even get here?"
"A good man brought you in. He was good enough to take care of the bills so we have nothing to worry about there. But I am still worried about you Maraïda. I just wish you'd agree to see a specialist, get help. Maraïda you're slowly slipping away and I don't know how to help you," tears rolled down her eyes.
So he was the one who brought me here! Or maybe it wasn't him! The way he affected my mentality was something I never wanted to experience again. The moment I had set my eyes on him again, it was like a video of that night replayed live in front of my eyes.
Everything around me felt uneasy just by me thinking he was around here somewhere in the world. I was just itching to get out of the goddamned place.
"Good then. It means I'm free to go right? I need to get out of here." I struggled to push myself off from the bed, but a sharp pain shot through my lower abdomen causing me to slump back into the bed like a jellyfish in water.
What the hell had that been?
"Stop Mara, you could hurt yourself or the..." Issa started then suddenly stopped. Curiosity swarm through my mind. I furrowed my brows in a questioning manner.
"The what?" I asked, still wincing at the pain. Issa didn't answer, "am I sick? Is it bad? Am I dying or something?" she fiddled with her fingers and started chewing on her lower lip.
I knew Issa like the back of my hand and right then, she was very unsuccessfully trying to hide something from me.
"What is it Issa?"
"The doctor recommended you stay in the hospital again for a while for monitoring because... you're- you're pregnant."
"What? That's a serious joke right? Issa? I cannot be pregnant! No!" My heart was pounding in my chest, "I cannot be pregnant," tears rolled down my eyes as memories of my experience replayed in my head. I can't have a child! I could barely keep the last one alive.
No! There was no way I was pregnant or having a baby.
Pain and agony which I already had intensified.
My life shit!
Pregnant?How could I be?I wondered how far gone I had been. I had completely forgotten the usual phenomenons that reminded me of womanhood every months. I had missed my period for two months straight and hadn't put in a fist of care as to why. I just thought how good it was to not have to worry about tampons for the past couple of months.Two months ago, I spent a night in a strip club, with a man, a stranger who had his way with me and paid me for it. I needed a huge amount of money for the treatment of my little sick niece. I was desperate; desperate enough to have sold my body to that one man, that one night.I called it my ultimate sacrifice in this life. I made it in vaine though.It was just one time. One time that I didn't feel anything but voids upon voids of complete emptiness. One fucking time!But then, my mama would always tell me before; sometimes, that's all it t
I was pregnant.Jared Shenko was responsible.Jasper Shenko was married.Jared Shenko wanyed to take full responsibility for my pregnancy despite his wife.I still couldn't put my thoughts together, I couldn't get my mind at peace. Everything seemed so surreal; like a dream that wouldn't end. Plus all that, I had one question that kept on coming back to my head,Was I ready to givebit all up?Give what up?That was the one other question that I ended up on after every contemplation I made. What was I going to give to have this child for Jared. I had no dreams or aspirations that I wanted to follow; I had nothing to hold on to as an excuse to not have this baby.What was I going to sacrifice so much for nothing?It wasn't nothing but still; was I ready to sarcastically honor this world with my presence
Jared's POVIf that was all it took, I was willing to work my way around it somehow. Sophia was going to hate me; a lot; but she was going to have to forgive me. This was probably going to be my only chance at fatherhood and I didn't mind given this girl the sky for it.She was deranged! Mental if I must say. I had no idea why she wanted this; what she planned on gaining from it, but I was ready to sacrifice the necessary for the child she was carrying; my child.Prior to that, Dr. Seuss had drawn to my notice that she was mentally distraught, a little unstable and all she needed was care. I was ready to bare that cross for my child. I would bare that for the next seven months till my child was born.There was so much already going through my mind but nothing could overcome the joy I felt knowing I was finally going to be a father of my own child.I had plans for the girl; Maraïda too. I had pl
My beautiful wife, named Sophia Estella Shenko though sometimes I call her Mia as in my cara mia. She had been my pillar and shield through some pretty rough moments of my life. I met her when I was eight. We lived practically next door to each other. We had practically nothing in comment but quickly, became a weird duo of best friends.During our teenage years, she and I would pretend to be gay: first to stop a lot of mongers from spreading unpleasant rumours about our relationship and second, to get an opportunity in finding the perfect match for each other.Stupid? Iknow!But it was a fun exercise that kept us both very engage in each others life. So much so that we became each others perfect match unknowingly. We knew so much about each other, respected very well our differences, knew each other's biggest weakness, and toughest strengths. We truly compli
I remember one time when Sophia had been cheated on by a guy she was seeing. We were in high school and I was a very problematic child. Back in the day, all it'll ever take was dust to enter her eye for me to punch someone, anyone in the gut for sweeping dust her way. She'd left school without telling me. I went crazy looking for her. I had no idea why she'd disappeared but I had a bad feeling she was in trouble. After hours of searching, I found her by a stream, soaking under the rain. At first I thought she had gone crazy. But she hadn't. She had been crying under the rain to hide her tears.She said the rain washes away her pain as soon as the left her eyes. She told me about her heartbreak, she poured her heart out to me. One minute I was listening to her, and the next I was fuming in anger. I felt her pain almost as if it was mine; like right inside of me. I wanted to bash the face of the idiot. But more than that I wanted to hug her, cuddle her under
Mara's POVA cold night always brought an angel to cuddle up inside my arms like her life depended on me. We had so many cold stormy nights and they always sent her flying into my arms because she was scared of storms, thunder, darkness; my little darling: my Marisa. It was the same cold night that had plagued her little heart with an illness; she had contracted pneumonia when we were kicked out of our home and had to spend a series of nights out in the cold, on the streets. We squatted in dek allies, under bridges, in places no human being should ever find their self in. We ate from trash cans, left overs and some days nothing at all. On a cold night she had started coughing and burning up while I was out in the world looking for a means for us to survive. On a cold night, I had gone through the ga badge cans by a pharmacy to get something, anything that could help her. It was on a cold night that I ran in and out of stores, homes, work places, pleading,
I thought she was going to die. I thought my chances at fatherhood had been shattered. I had never been so scared in my entire life. While we drove back to the hospital, Issa and my wife did everything they could to keep her warm; she was freezing under that rain. Sophia had even taken off her own blazer to cover her up. I could see her continually throwing dirty glances at me through the rear mirror. At some point she had to ask me something to calm her spirit.Meanwhile, I had my own questions crawling through my mind, like; how did she not feel she was slowly killing herself? How did she forget she was carrying a child? How could she have been so reckless? To say I was mad, at her, would be an understatement. I was enraged. But even so, I was scared. If anything was to happen to her, or my baby, my last hope of having a child of my own; my own flesh and blood, all would have been lost.We reached the hospital and immediately she was
Life at the Shenko's mansion was life. The kind of life I hadn't been given in my lifetime. I wasn't always a homeless street kid or squatter. There had been a time in my life when I had a full family, a roof over my head, food on my table, warm cloths on my skin, laughter in my home, and money in my wallet. But then, from one day to another, in the blink of an eye, everything came crumbling down. I couldn't understand why or how, but things changed drastically for everyone around me. I lost my family, my home, my dreams, my friends, my hopes and aspirations; everything evaporated just like that. I had no idea how hard things were about to get for me.Being in Jared Shenko's house reminded me of all I had forgotten about; like what having a good home cooked meal on the table felt and looked like.Did I say a meal? No!They were like ten different stuff on this table and it was only still breakfast. Mr.
(Ten years later) A five years old little girl in pink ballerina getup is dancing and twirling happily in the middle of a huge living room. Her bright blue eyes are filled with excitement as she jumps about. She stops and runs to the foot of a flight of stairs, "Mummy hurry up! I'm going to miss my show if we are late," her little voice yells, "I'm coming, I'm coming! Gosh! You're so feisty today. And it's the school's show not yours," a woman with similar blue eyes walks majestically down the stairs. Her blonde curls are bouncing just above her shoulders. Her slender fingers are grazing the walls as she steadies herself on each step she takes, while her other hand lays steadily on her already huge bump. She's heavily pregnant. "Where are your stuff?" "Already in the car! Now move a little bit faster!" "Is your father already here?"
"What did you do then?""You ask as if you don't already know,""I do! But I still want to hear it,""Alright alright! I'll finish it then.I became so confused. I didn't know what to do. I admitted I wasn't in good terms with Maraïda but I could've never wished her death. I had so much on my hand that I became traumatized: on one hand I had Maraïda; she only needed help, love and care, she still had a good chance in life; On the other hand you, innocent! Knowing nothing about what was happening, just wanting to be out and free. Then there was your father in the air, I didn't know if he was ever waking up. It was hard. But I had to be strong for all of you. Then I remembered something. There was a time when Maraïda and Jared had a fight. I remembered promising your mother that day to be a good mother to you. But I also made her another promise...(Flashback
In the third person's POV(10 years later)A blonde woman in a light knee length red floral dress is leaning on a silver - ish pink Range Rover sports. She looks in a hurry; checking on her Gucci watch after every two seconds,"Ellie! Hurry up young lady, we haven't got all day." She keeps staring impatiently at the doors of the flower shop and checking her watch,"Dang it Ellie, come on! We're going to be late for the day. We still have so much to do."A little girl comes out of the shop with a big bouquet of roses obscuring her entire face. Her long blonde hair is dangling from behind her white lace dress paired with a pair of pink flats. Someone follows from behind her with another bunch of flowers, way too big for her hands. The lady in front of the car turns to the little girl, with her blue eyes popping out I surprise,"Ellie! When you said you were getting flowers, I didn
Jared's POVIt all became as clear as day to me when I watched Cassidy's video. I felt like a storm rain had just washed down on me. All this time, Maraïda played me; she made a fool of me, while I sympathized with her sneakiness. I watch with horror as she cut her own self and smudge the blood all over her thighs; as she pretended to scream; as she fake fainted!I was a such a terrible state that day and to think she was just mocking me."Why Maraïda? Why did you do all of this to me? Why did you ruin my life? Why? What did I ever do to you?" She started crying. Her fake tears just made me angrier. I was standing on a bridge between life and death, trying to control my temper, in order not to seriously hurt her."You've been playing me for a fool all this time! I lost everything! I lost my wife because of you!" I yelled harshly at her. She shrieked to a corner of the kitchen, not being able to look at
Maraïda's POVOne phone call had turned into him driving off without even telling me where he was going. I waited for almost four hours in my room. I decided to run down stairs for a glass of water. I was a few feet away from the kitchen entrance when I heard one of the maids talking,"This really sucks. This house was a lot livelier with Madame Sophia around." The first maid said,"Yeah. Everything changed when that woman, that surrogate got here," she wore a disgusted scowl on her face, "Hey, don't talk about miss Maraïda like that. You know she's the new lady of the house now," another maid added,"New lady my foot! That woman is a sneaky bitch! She just wants to replace Madame Sophia in Mr. Shenko's life." The second maid with the scowl repeated,"Cassidy!!!" The head maid, I remember was called Fatou, scolded her, "Stop! What ever happens in our superiors lives is none of
Jared's POVThey were already a good number of questions running through my mind while I drove through the gates of the house. That Joseph guy had set my already disrupted peace of mind in absolute chaos. Maraïda was already eight months in and I wasn't ready for anything or anyone that could jeopardize her health; mentally or physically. My daughter's life mattered more to me than anything. I was not about to jeopardize it for something that might not even matter.I had just pulled up in the driveway when three maids rushed out to take the bags, I helped Maraïda out,"Aren't you coming?" She asked,"Go on ahead, I'll make a call first. Help her in would you?" I motion one of the maids. Once they'd disappeared behind the doors, I brought my phone and a card, tapped on the numbers, he picked
Maraïda's POVJared had become more engaging in everything concerning the baby. We'd taking another maternity visit together, and we were as well shopping together. It was during one the shopping sprees that I had run into Sophia. Jared had stayed back in the shop to complete the payments. I didn't want them to meet each other under any circumstances. I knew for one Jared still loved and wanted Sophia back and also she was likely to take him back because she seemed to love him more than herself. I had witnessed it. I couldn't take such a chance! So by all means possible I had to make her leave; and as fast as possible.I did make her leave. But she had the last word;"...just like you're trying to have my husband. But let me remind you this Maraïda;
Sophia's POVThis particular phase of my life was like a repeated phase. Some kind of déjà vu. The first time I remember like it was yesterday though it's been years; it was when I left Jared, to go away, far away with the pregnancy he wasn't ready for. I was broken, wrecked and utterly disgraced. I felt so embarrassed thinking in was growing feelings for him when he wasn't even an ounce bit interested in me or having a family. I still don't remember how I survived without him, because I became so stressed; extremely stressed that I had to rely on crack. I hated it so much but I went into drinking and drugs: careless of what effect it might have had on me or my baby. Consequently, I had a miscarriage. That was how it went down. I lost my baby! The only one I was ever going to get. Because the cleansing process caused me fertility. My reproductive organs had suffered the highest as the drugs, alcohol and all that burned my womb so bad that the doctors said I was lucky to
Jared's POVI had been in the office all day, like I had been lately, knee deep into my work. Sometimes I wished I could just stay in the office and work all through. But that was not how it worked. I had to go back to my home which didn't feel like it anymore. I got home but she wasn't home. No one had any idea about her whereabouts, she hadn't said a thing to me either.It took everything humane that I had in me not break down the main doors of the house when I heard a car pull up in the yard. How could she still have the guts to leave this house without my knowledge or permission? We had already agreed, she couldn't leave without my knowledge! And now she was demanding I let her be the mother of my child! None of this was ever part of the deal! All I wanted was my child and my wife. But I had lost my wife. Sophia wasn't even answering my calls or replying my messag