Burden

The rain hammers against the pavement, each drop is a tiny dagger against Sarah's flimsy umbrella. Gloomily, the wind tugs at her coat like an impatient child, icy fingers slipping down her collar and making her shiver.

Her arms aches under the weight of the packages, their edges digging into her skin, shifting unpredictably with every uneven step. Then holds them tighter, as if something inside of them is more significant than just paper and ribbon.

Contradictory to her old clothes and faded sneakers she wears, is her beauty that glisten as water runs down delicate Chinese American features, tracing her cheekbones with the curve. It catches at her lashes and clings there. Her chestnut brown strands hold fast to wet skin as she draws in a ragged breath- almost a sigh, almost a sob. She doesn't know if it is the rain wetting her face or frustration trying to burst inside her chest. It doesn't matter. Nobody notices, huddles in an embrace with this storm, with the idea that one must continue because it would be impossible to stop.

But then, for a moment, she does stop. Just long enough to adjust the packages in her arms, just long enough to tilt her face upward. The cold droplets sting, sharp and real, grounding her. The city rushes on around her, unmindful. But the rain—somehow, the rain understands.

Finally, she reaches the ornate gate of the village where the Lui mansion stands tall. Just as she was struggling to open the gate, a guard came to her rescue, holding the enormous iron grill open for her.

"Here you go, young lady. Let me help you with those boxes," he kindly offers.

Sarah manages a tired smile, grateful for the gesture. "Thank you," she says softly.

With the guard's assistance, she makes her way through the garden path, the rain-soaked ground making the journey even more arduous. As she approaches the entrance of the mansion, she was met with a look of disdain from her step cousin, Adelle.

"Ugh, Sarah, finally. My gown box better not be ruined because of your clumsiness," Adelle, her cousin sneers.

Sarah's heart sinks as she carefully placed the stack of boxes on the ground. "I'll make sure it's okay, Adelle. I'm sorry," she replies apologetically.

Before she could inspect the boxes, she felt a sharp pull on her hair. Huifen had appeared, her face contorted with anger. "You're such a disgrace, Sarah. Always messing things up," she scolds.

The pain in Sarah's scalp is almost unbearable, but she swallowed her tears, determined not to show any weakness. "I'll fix it right away, Aunt Huifen," she says, her voice quivering slightly.

"That's right, you better," Huifen retorts, releasing her grip on Sarah's hair.

With a heavy heart, Sarah opened the gates, then starts unloading the boxes. As she placed them inside, one box accidentally slipped from her hands and fell to the floor. The sound of shattering bottle of newly purchased condiment echoed through the mansion.

All parts of the tasks were entrusted into her by her aunt Huifen. The Lui mansion was formerly owned by the late actress, Daisy Lui, who adopted her when she was still an infant.

Sadly, she died mysteriously when she was just six years old. According to her aunt, the coroner reported it as pill overdose. Until now she hasn’t seen the autopsy report. The mansion before was a haven of laughter and happiness, where she played as a child. But those are just memories now. Something to reminisce, whenever she's lonely or maltreated by her aunt and cousin.

"Hey, Sarah, can't you do anything better!?" Her cousin kicks her back while she's picking the box of gown.

Sarah feels a stinging pain in her back caused by Adelle's pumps. But she still tries to move quickly, so the broken fish sauce bottle won't soil her cousin's birthday party gown.

"Mom, Sarah dropped my gown box, and had the fish sauce soiled it," Adelle whines, her tone filled with annoyance.

Sarah's eyes welled up with tears, but she quickly wipes them away, unwilling to give her cousin the satisfaction of seeing her cry. "Please, I'm sorry. I'll be more careful next time. The fish sauce didn't catch with your gown fabric," she apologizes, trying to keep her voice steady.

Huifen marches towards her, displeasure evident in her eyes as she pulled her hair again. "You clumsy girl! Clean up that mess, immediately," she orders.

With painful back and hairline, Sarah's hands tremble. After keeping the gown in safe, she starts cleaning up the broken pieces, her heart feeling heavier with each spike of battle she picks up.

She longs for the day when she could escape the oppressive atmosphere of the mansion and find a place where she would be valued and treated with kindness and as a human being.

Finally, when the mess was cleared, Huifen continues her list of instructions. "Proceed to the kitchen and help with the dinner. And make sure you don't break anything or mess up there as well," she says sternly.

With tears still lingering in her eyes, Sarah followed her aunt's orders, then treads her way to the kitchen. Despite her weariness and the pain in her back and hairline, she knew she had to continue carrying on.

The bulk of her responsibilities in the house is immensely heavy. She prays to the Christian God her mama Daisy taught her, to endure and overcome everything.

"One more month, and I'm out of here," she comforts herself.

In the kitchen, she finds herself assisting the cook, Mira, in preparing dinner. Mira's warm smile and kind words offered a glimmer of solace amidst the harshness of the mansion. As they work side by side, Mira noticed the tears in Sarah's eyes.

"Hey, what's the matter, child? Why do you look so sad?" Mira asks her gently.

Sarah takes a deep breath, trying to compose herself. "It's nothing, Mira. I'm just tired," she replies, her voice soft.

Mira places a reassuring hand on Sarah's shoulder. "You work so hard, my dear. Don't let their words get to you. You're strong and capable, and one day you'll shine brightly beyond these walls," she sincerely encourages her.

Sarah beams gratefully, her heart warmed by Mira's comfort. In that moment, she feels a sense of belongingness, even with the intoxicating family she has. With Mira's encouragement, she knows she has to keep moving forward, to endure the atrocities of her aunt and cousin.

At the dinner, Mr. Alfred Lui invites Sarah to join the dinner because he has something important to tell her.

"Congratulations, my dear. You are truly amazing. You got a scholarship at Harvard University. And this morning, the headmaster of your school called me up, and announced that you'll be recognized as the top awardee in your Senior High School graduation rites."

Her uncle is filled with genuine appreciation. "I'm so proud of you!" Alfred Lui reaches out for his niece's hands and squeezed them as form of congratulatory.

Alfred is the brother of her adoptive mother. Upon her death, he has become her guardian since she was still a minor, when she lost her Mama Daisy, as she fondly calls her.

Her uncle continues, "You were also asked to play at the governor's ball on the end of the month. I never knew you were into piano."

"Thank you very much uncle. I play piano during class breaks at the music room. Mama Daisy taught how when I was a kid." The memory of them playing piano side by side, gives joy to Sarah's heart.

"Huifen, Adelle, aren't you happy for Sarah? Why don't you say something?" Alfred asks his wife and daughter, who are seemingly silent and with poker faces all the while he was phrasing and talking with his niece.

"Dad, we all know she is bright. Listen dad, people say that daughters of prostitutes sired by Caucasian men usually come off intelligent or talented. But I'm your daughter, right? And you are a respectable man." Adelle replies mockingly but in a sweet tone.

"What?! Who told you Sarah's mom was a prostitute? Was it you, Huifen?!" Mr. Lui was furious and looks at her wife and daughter with anger in his eyes.

"My dear, you are over-reacting! It's just a social cliché. It usually happens in movies and unfortunately, even in real life. Besides no one knows Sarah's real parents, not even the nuns at the orphanage. Judging by her looks, she is with Western blood, so don't blame your innocent daughter." Huifen, with her viciousness adds injury to the insult.

Sarah vows down her head and tears again are swelling from her eyes. She couldn't take it much longer, the insult of her character and to the parents she never knew.

"Excuse me, I think the dessert is ready. I'll get it for you." She stands and turns her back immediately for tears have successfully damped her face.

"Hey, Sarah, don't forget my chocolate pudding. And yours, too." Adelle commands her cousin sweetly in front of her father.

"See how your daughter is nothing but a very thoughtful and supportive sister to her cousin. Isn't that sweet?" Huifen serves red wine on her husband's goblet.

"I'm glad she has developed affection for her cousin." Alfred replies while taking a sip of the wine. "This one is good, honey," referring to the wine.

"I'm happy you appreciate your daughter and the wine I have chosen for dinner." She looks at her daughter and winks at her.

Huifen has mastered her skills on playing a dutiful wife while in reality she is a wicked woman with so much envy towards Daisy when she was alive, and with enormous greed in her heart.

As the night wears off, Sarah continues her work in the kitchen, scrubbing the floors. Her thoughts consumed by the dreams she held close to her heart.

She longs for the day when she would be free from the heavy burden she carries. The day when she would be recognized for her worth and given the opportunity to pursue her dreams.

"Sarah, my child, you should be sleeping now." Mira tells her. "Tomorrow is Saturday, continue it in the morning."

"I'm ok, Mira. There's a lot of things to be done tomorrow. Sunday is Adelle's 18th birthday party."

"Oh, that witch cousin of yours. She complained that the chocolate pudding was not as soft as she expected it to be.

"Sarah sat on the floor and looks up at Mira, " You baked so yummy. I ate a part of it. Thanks for everything. Go to sleep now. I will be done in few minutes time."

Mira plants a kiss on her forehead. "OK, my child. Good night. By the way, congratulations! You've always been a bright kid. I'm sure Daisy up there, is so proud of you," raising her point finger up, signifying heaven.

She got up and hugs Mira's plump body. Mira has played the mother role in her life for almost eight years. Protecting her from the mean Lui ladies, whenever she could. The kindness of Mira gives her the strength to carry on.

And in her heart, a flicker of hope burns bright, a reminder that one day, she would break free from the maltreatment of her aunt and cousin. So, she must really work her way to earn a college degree.

She hopes her uncle Alfred would help her financially as well. But sometimes, there a doubt in her mind, if he would truly support her. Because he made a promise to make her as part of the family, but it never happened. He was always under the shadow of his vicious wife, who loves to make things difficult for her.

After her Mama Daisy died, her uncle told her that the court has decided, she will be under his care, and they will live together in the mansion as a family. His wife Huifen will treat her as a real daughter and would take care of her. While, Adelle, will be like a sister to her.

During the court proceedings, her aunt and uncle were more like real parents to her. Unfortunately, after a week, everything changed. Alfred Lui's promises never really materialized. Sadly, she was never treated by Huifen as a part of the family...

She recalls, as a child, she innocently asked her uncle what Last Will and Testament means, because she heard it from her private tutor. On the following day, she found her private tutor crying at the front porch and was sent back to her hometown Fujian. And Mira her nanny, was told to be the cook, leaving her tending to all her needs at the age of six, even when she was sick, and longing for her Mama Daisy’s warmth.

The ornate grandfather clock in the drawing-room chimed, its melodious tones echoing through the silent house. Six-year-old Sarah, perched on a velvet armchair, gazed at the intricate carvings, her brow furrowed in concentration.

"Uncle Alfred," she finally pipes up, her voice barely a whisper, "What's a 'Last Will and Testament'? Miss Evelyn said it today."

Her uncle Alfred, startled from his perusal of the newspaper, chuckled. "Oh, that's a big word, Sarah! It's a special kind of letter that grown-ups write to say what should happen to their things after they're gone."

Sarah's eyes widen. "Gone? Like disappear?"

Sensing a need for a gentler explanation, he softens tone. "Well, not disappear exactly. Everyone goes to heaven someday, Sarah. This letter helps people know who should get their things when they can't use them anymore."

Sarah tilts her head, pondering. "But why does Miss Evelyn cry?"

Her uncle pauses, the newspaper forgotten in his lap. "Sometimes, these letters can be sad to think about, Sarah. But they're also important to make sure everything is taken care of."

The following day, the joyous atmosphere that usually permeated the house was replaced by an unsettling silence. Sarah, venturing out to the front porch, discovered Miss Evelyn, her face tear-stained, packing a small trunk.

"Why are you crying, Miss Evelyn?" Sarah asks, her voice trembling.

Miss Evelyn, her voice thick with emotion, manages a weak smile. "I have to go home, Sarah. To Fujian. I can't teach you anymore."

Sarah's heart sinks and Miss Evelyn has been more than just a tutor, she has been a friend, a source of endless stories and playful games.

Miss Evelyn, unable to bear the sight of the child's distress, hugs her tightly. "I... I can't stay, Sarah. Please take care, Sarah."

And with that, Miss Evelyn turned and walked away, leaving Sarah feeling abandoned and confused. Life without Miss Evelyn was a stark contrast to the vibrant days of learning and laughter.

Nanny Mira, on the other hand was removed as her nanny, she is now burdened with the responsibilities of both cook and caretaker, was overwhelmed. Sarah, left to her own, often felt lonely, missing Mama Daisy's warm embraces and comforting presence.

One rainy afternoon, huddled on the window seat, Sarah confessed her longing to Mira. "I miss Mama Daisy, Mira. I miss her hugs."

Mira, her gaze fixed on the pouring rain, sighed. "I know, sweetheart. I miss her too. She was a wonderful woman."

Despite her heavy workload, Mira always found subtle ways to comfort Sarah. Old Peter, the family driver, a gruff but kind man, would discreetly slip extra allowance into Sarah's hands, a silent gesture of affection.

"Thank you, Peter," Sarah whispers, her eyes shining. "You're the best!"

"For you, anything, little miss," Peter would reply, his gruff exterior softening.

Her aunt's voice was gentle, but with changed expression, from being an angel smiling a week ago to a grouchy relative, "Your mother has some financial difficulties, Sarah. She was worried about bankruptcy."

Then her uncle nods, his eyes filled with a mixture of sadness and regret. "Yes, something like that. It was a difficult time for her."

Ever the pragmatist, she continues, "Your mother has only one blood relative, Sarah--- your Uncle Alfred. Of course, you've been told about since you were three, that your real parents would take you soon and your Mama daisy just adopted you."

Sarah looks at aunt, a flicker of hope in her eyes. "Yes, auntie. But Uncle Alfred helped my mama, right?"

Her aunt with a hint of pride creeping into her voice, replies, "Indeed, your uncle helped her a great deal. Your mother was struggling in her acting career. Alfred helped her with her loans."

Sarah's innocent eyes widen. "He's so kind."

Unable to resist an opportunity to boast, she smiles smugly. "Certainly, Alfred is a very successful businessman. Lui Canning Factory is starting to thrive under his management."

Almost everyday, her Aunt Huifen always brags, that Lui Canning Factory has been successful under her uncle Alfred's management.

That childhood memory marked the beginning of a series of difficult experiences in her life...

And now, needless to say, her future isn't clear, though her scholarship is the closest hope she has to reach her dreams.