By the time I blinked, she was gone. My stomach was in coils. My gut wrecked. My heart in shreds. Her words echoed with such force yet still I couldn’t understand most of them. I did not dare stand up because I would fall and when Elio came, I don’t know what I said but I was glad when I couldn’t see him before me. I sat thinking I would vomit. My world span and stopped as I processed her words thoroughly. I analyzed everything she said and it was like a movie playing in my head. It was so clear, seeing my life unfold in my head the way she said it would. Every word she spoke was true. She had probably went through it and even thinking of what she went through shuttered me. To live that life, to go through that pain, it must have broke her apart. In my head I could see myself in bed, feet on sheets, waiting in the dark, waiting for Elio while he screwed someone else. Even the thought brought such an animalistic groan from me. I had never had such intense hunger for violence. I would
I did not even know what my closet had and if I would have anything fancy enough. I felt out of place, never having been to something so fancy. I rushed to my room thinking I would find Elio there to help me. I took the last step, my side hurting just a little. A few women stood by my door, a case standing right beside them. I approached with much caution. “Hello.” I softly greeted as their eyes creepily ate me up. A shiver ran down my body as I slowly approached because it was clear they had been waiting for me. “Sorry miss Ferarro. We are here to do your makeup and hair.” One of the ladies said, my eyes nearly popping right out. Ofcourse Elio would take care of me even after our fight. “Thank you. Sorry if you have been waiting for so long.” I mentioned, walking in the room straight to the closet to put away the tiny bag in my hand with my flowers. The paper bags of what I bought earlier were lined in my closet. I smiled, walking further to stop as I saw a dress hanging where it
Ninety-five percent of my best days on earth were because of Elio. As we danced around as if the world was ours, I had never been so happy. I was so happy I could not stop crying and sniffling. My favorite artist was singing whom he had flown in. Who knows how much he paid. The guests watched with gleaming eyes as I giggled and hid my head in Elio’s chest because all the emotions were making me look as if I had lost my sanity. I felt like I was flying. It was hard to believe this was all real but indeed, he had made me the happiest girl on earth. “A month is all I can wait.” Elio said as I grinned even harder. “I will barely get there. We can do it tomorrow.” I chirped in with my largest grin. Even if he said right on that second I would have been game. “My fiancé will have the big wedding she has always dreamt of.” He answered, as if he hadn’t swooned me enough. The song came to an end and I was sure my face was a mess from all the crying that had been happening. I dabbed my fin
“Okay.” Salvatore let go, showing that he was in tune to our conversation while he held another with his cousins. I turned around to Elio and he led me to Mamma who held two glasses of champagne in her hand. Elio kissed me and Mamma before he walked away and left us. I did not know how the conversation would go. I did not know if she was angry I did not listen to her. “Come.” She called, handing me a glass of champagne. The white cotton dress sat well on her chubby form. Her hair and nails were well done, jewels screaming old money donning her. She was a beautiful Italian queen and I am sure back in the day many cried over her. Her body turned, walking from everyone and the party. A shiver ran down my body, not sure how it would all unfold. She couldn’t kill me, right? The sound of the music drowned away, the cold air blowing on our skin. The darkness of the night surrounded us with just a few house lights brightening it all for us. With each second of silence that passed betwee
It felt like it was the first time we would be sharing a room. The house was bubbling with chatter even as we all retired to our rooms. I felt guilty that I had not checked if Irya was good with her room but seeing Salvatore hold her hand so possessively as he walked her to her room had my heart skip so many beats. She seemed to be on her own cloud of happiness. Elio opened the door to his room which was dark and I was not surprised. It seemed younger Elio was good at expressing the darkness in him. Everything was elegant, luxurious, and black. The room seemed like the grim reaper’s tomb. There was little to no furniture and that which was present looked like something from a vampire’s lure. “Wait here, let me get something.” I quickly ran to my room. I grabbed what I needed and ran back to stop at the slightly opened door. “Where are you? Close your eyes!” I slowly pushed the door in to peak my head. Elio stood by the bed, busy with his phone while his back was to me. I bit my lo
Elio did not have to try his tactics to wake me up. I had a dream of the day ahead and I couldn’t wait to live in it with my fiancé. The ring felt foreign on my finger, very heavy which I liked because there was not even a second where I forgot who I was and who I was engaged to. I couldn’t function without my music. I blustered it from my phone as we made the bed and tidied the room. I gave Elio a private show of my sick moves in the bathroom. He laughed all the way but I knew he liked my moves. Brushing my teeth while standing next to him was a dream. I couldn’t take my eyes off him. We hopped into the shower then Elio looked into my wound. He decided it was time to let it breathe so we did not replace the bandage. “Come on, we will be late, mamma will come get us herself.” “And who is to blame?” Elio questioned as I laughed out loud. “You always take the blame my love. Rule number one of marriage, the wife never does anything wrong.” I shot out as a matter of fact. He stared b
My arm was doing the most. My whole body moved with the car, the corner felt deep to the bone as I swung with the car. I had coerced Elio to play music and, in my head, I was in a music video. I wanted to stand on my chair and throw my arms in the air but it was a fight because I also wanted to drive. “Turn left.” The navigator called, me doing just that with a frown on my face because we were in a parking lot and I had to park the car. If me and Elio had a fight, all he would have to do is let me drive his car. I was on a hundred, not able to climb off as we stepped out of the car. There were no guards, just him and I. He moved to lace our fingers then he tucked me under his wing, our hands hanging over my shoulder. I already knew where he was taking me and life couldn’t get any better. The boat was screaming old money and I guess Elio was old money rich. His family had been in the mafia business for decades and he just inherited it all with his brother. Even thinking about it was
“We will have the wedding at home, right? The estate is beautiful. It would be easier for everyone than them flying to the US. I like it here.” I said suddenly, changing the topic. “Mamma would be happy.” He said as I smiled out brightly. “I would like all our cultures to be represented too.” I added nervously. I did not know much about the culture from mother’s side but I wanted it represented too along with the Italian and American culture. Elio nodded his head in agreement and I was more than happy. “You don’t mind that your friend will be planning the wedding? I did not think to ask you about it. I am so used to just doing things on my own.” He paused. “I am sorry for not asking you.” He apologized so sweetly it had me grinning. “I am happy you picked her. I will get to spend more time with her and it will be so much fun planning the wedding with her and Mamma.” I grinned out but stopped. “Won’t she lose her internship though?” “She lost it,” “Because of me?” I stared in hor
I felt the lights then saw them. I felt as we walked through the house. I ran my hands into Elio’s hair, pulling him to me as if I wanted to infuse myself into him. His hands ran up to my waist and when he pulled back I kissed his jaw and lower to his neck. Soft music suddenly filled the house and water soon sprayed on our naked bodies. A deep shiver ran down yet not even it would tear me from my heaven. We were no longer just kissing because it felt like we were devouring each other. I felt as if he was kissing me deep into my heart. His hands tightened on my waist and I did not protest as he lifted me off. I found my footing while buried deep in his essence. He turned me around, kissing my jaw down to my neck as I leaned my head back on his shoulder. A moan pulled from the deepest hole in my core. I arched my back to him as his hand grabbed and mold my breast with such hunger. His other slid down my belly. I spread my legs for him, his dick pressed hard on my back. His hand ran dow
“Husband.” I coaxed, the car flying off the road. Wind blew through the thrown-back roof. I felt free, felt unbound, and cosmic. Elio’s groan and warning look had me giggling. I pushed off the seat, my hands moving up my thighs. I felt Elio’s eyes which made me turn my head to stare at him. His eyes couldn’t even budge as I pulled the underwear I wore down. He turned to the road for a second then back. My white lace underwear was unhooked from my feet, bringing it to my face to sniff. “Lethu bella tentatrice, per favore, ferma il mio amore.” Lethu beautiful temptress, please stop my love. He begged, pressing on the gas. The white lace flew to his lap and I watched as he pulled it up to his face, sniffing it. His eyes closed and when they opened I knew I was in for it. The car took a swerve fifteen minutes later and we were down and near the beach. I could hear the water crush. I could smell them and I could feel them already kissing my skin. We drove up a narrow tropical driveway th
I changed to my reception dress and I danced what seemed like hours with Elio. He spun me around the dance square with my smile so bright my jaw nearly dislocated. After him I danced with Salvatore. It was three full songs of him just waltzing me in his arms. “What do I call you? Sal? Big Bro? Volturi? Oohh, I like that one.” I chirped up as he spun me away only for my body to spin back into his arms. His face fell into a frown. “Do I even want to know what that is?” He questioned as I giggled. “You should watch the twilight movie and the breaking dawn movies. I promise you will like them.” I grinned, him corking a brow but then relaxed. I knew he would watch them and I wished I could see his reaction. I would pay money for it. My insides melted for the hundredth time. He picked me up, my palms on his with my whole weight on him as we turned around. As sad as it had been back then, the wedding being postponed was a blessing because there I was, dancing like a princess with the men
I knew there were over a thousand guests scattered on both sides but I could only see blurs. I heard the buzz, so many drones capturing the whole moment. I heard the weeps, the guests even more emotional. My eyes fixed further down the alter where I was going and I could not help but gasp as my vision cleared. I had last seen Elio the morning before when Salvatore and all the men took him away for a day and night to remember. He stood in his black tux looking so good. His eyes were on me, never faltering. His leg shook and I knew he was holding everything back from just weeping as I was. I was full-on crying and it was so embarrassing. By the time we reached the end I was not even sure I could stand on my own. “Who gives her away?” The officiate asked. “I do.” Mom spoke, pulling her arm from me. Elio descended down and held out his hand. Mom put my hand in his before he kissed my cheek then Elio’s. “I love you both.” She whispered and it nearly left me scattered on the floor lik
Two Months Later “Champagne?” My fifteen-year-old sister gestured, the glass filled with the sparkling liquid held out for me. I narrowed my eyes at her. “Hold it for me sis.” She turned around and I watched as she scoured the room for mother’s eyes before she quickly took a sip. It was why she took the champagne glass in the first place. I chuckled, shaking my head. About seven people ran around me, picking a certain part of the dress, pinning, or dusting something off. They were all in panic which hid my own panic. Eyes from the girls were on me as they dived in the delicates offered in the room. I folded my moist hands, eyes moving around the large room again with red the only thing I saw. Elio took it upon himself to make sure I woke up with every part of our room filled with dahlia flowers. There were boxes on boxes of red, pink and white dahlias. I blushed and nearly giggled while recalling the smell that had hit my nostrils as I came alive from dream land. My head had tu
Giving Elio his sponge bath was the highlight of my days as the week progressed along with spending some time with my mother. It was the only time where no one else occupied the room, leaving me with Elio to take care of him. It brought some light back in me. If anyone walked in they would label me crazy because the whole process was spent with me just talking his ear off or singing to him, hoping my terrible singing would wake him up. I realized just then that he was my best friend and not being able to hear his voice over the days tore me apart. I refrained from telling him about my mother and siblings because I wanted to do it when I could stare in his eyes and see him excited for me. In a span of three days I had learned so much about my mother’s life and culture. She taught me so many things and I could not wait to have cooking dates with her which we put a pin on because she and my siblings were leaving in a day. It saddened me but surely Elio and I would visit whenever we coul
Death. You can dream about it. You can talk about it. You can prepare for it but when it hits, it breaks everything in you and shows you that you can never be ready for it. Silence. A great abyss of silence. I saw them talk. I saw them walk. I saw them stand before me, eyes staring and lips moving but all I heard was silence. I curled myself in the chair, feet on the suede. A fleece blanket covered me, not sure when it was draped over but it brought me warmth. Head on my knees with my left hand holding on, afraid to let go because I was afraid that if I did then they would snatch Elio away. Internal bleeding, fractured ribs, torn muscles, ruptured spline. The list went on and on. The doctor’s words came and went as they had in the three days of my grief. A hand fell on my shoulder, my body jerking in fright, my eyes turning—red and burning. Brown eyes stared at me, never leaving. I could see the sadness, the heartache, reflecting pain I could not describe. For long minutes I jus
Mamma led us to the dining table where food lay in abundance. It seemed they had prepared a feast for Elio’s return. Mamma pulled Elio’s chair and he pulled mine back. We sat down, smiling and thanking as Mamma fussed over him, asking how he was, touching his face, kissing his cheeks, and plating his food. I took my own plate, just filing it because I was dead hungry. The few house staff stood by the door, watching and listening. Other family members, far many than those I left, took their seats. Dario stared at Elio intensely and as my eyes drifted around, Salvatore was nowhere to be seen. Irya sat on her chair, no one next to her. Three new people walked through the doors and I nearly splattered apart right there and then. My eyes went wide. Brown eyes stared back at me as if they had been waiting a lifetime to connect to mine. My world shook and crumbled all around me. I did not know if to cry, shout, jump, or just run. I felt like running, running from the truth staring right at
I don’t know when I fell asleep but I do recall hearing screams somewhere. I heard the crash of glass and I shrunk into myself before darkness engulfed me. In my dreams more trauma waited. In my dream I had been late and when I got to Eduardo he told me it was too late, that Elio had passed. The grief rocked me so hard I could feel myself shiver hard even in sleep. I tried shifting around the sheets to find warmth but none was provided. At a point I cried, weeping for my lost love and the feeling haunted me even as my eyes peeled open. My chest was so sore I couldn’t stop rubbing it. My body ached as if I had been thrown into a hurricane. The sheets were all twisted around me, some hanging to the floor. A trickle of sweat ran down my spine and instead of feeling rested, I felt as if someone murdered then brought me back to life. Movement caught my eye and that was when I saw Elio, his back turned to me. He was buttoning up his clean navy shirt, his hair combed back to perfection. Th