Chapter 79

“I would advise against it.” Alexander told Chase over the phone. Not that there was anything he could do to stop Chase from getting his hands on the footage if he was on a mission to do so.

“Dad, I need to see it. It’s affecting my relationship with Christine.” He paused, “Please.”

Alexander ruffled a hand through his hair. Does it ever stop? “Alright. I have it here.”

“I’ll be right over.” Chase ended the call.

For a long time, Alexander sat staring out at the window, watching the snow fall, swirling specks blown about by the ice wind. Just like us, Alexander thought, were all just specks being blown in all directions by an ill wind.

He heard Erica and the twins come back, but he stayed in his office, not having the courage to face Erica and ask, no, beg her forgiveness for accusing her of seeing Justin Hunter. He should have known better. Erica wasn’t that kind of woman. After all these years he still felt inferior to Hunter. He, Alexander didn’t deserve a woman like Erica, but still she stayed.

An hour later Chase arrived at his parents’ home. He’d successfully managed to avoid Raven, kissed his mother briefly, explaining he had business to discuss with his father and went down the passage to knock at Alexander’s office door.

“Sit. I would rather you watch this alone.” Alexander handed him the flash drive. “And when you’re done with it, Son, break it, burn it, but be done with it. It’s over.” He pressed his son’s shoulder and went out to find Erica.

***

Chase gripped the edge of the desk as he watched the start of the video, watching himself being injected by a masked man. The man he now knew was Mason. It was surreal, watching himself with the Amanda look-alike. The more he watched, the more disgusted he felt. He pressed his fist into his mouth to stop himself from crying out. But he forced himself to watch it to the end where Mason hit him with the statue.

He remembered the rage he felt and his fingers squeezing that woman’s throat. For some time when he was incarcerated, he’d started to believe that he’d actually killed her.

To think Mason forced Christine to watch this, to watch him fuck another woman. Like an animal. And turn on that same woman trying to strangle the life out of her.

“Oh, God…” The cry burst from his gut. He covered his face with his hands and wept. He cried for what Christine went through, for what happened to them, for all of it.

Alexander found him on the floor, sobbing like a child. He went down next to him and took his son in his arms.

***

Later Alexander dropped Chase off at this apartment.

“Thanks Dad.” Chase hugged his father and with that conveyed more than just thanks for bringing him home.

When he opened the door Christine rushed into his arms.

“Where were you? I was so worried.” Her eyes were red from crying. “Please don’t do that to me again. I need to know where you go, please Chase.”

“Chrissie, I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry.” He spoke hardly above a whisper against her temple.

She felt him shudder as if he felt chilled to the bones and she drew him into the lounge where it was warmer.

“It’s alright, Chase. I guess I’m just a bit paranoid after all that happened. I’m so scared you’d disappear.” She said, attempting to laugh away her fears.

He took her hand and led her to the couch where he sat down and pulled her onto his lap. Softly he cupped her face, stroking her cheek with his thumb. Christine looked at him, really studied his face and saw the pain in his eyes. For a while he said nothing, just held her face.

“I watched the video.” He said eventually, his voice rough with turmoil. “I can’t say it enough, Chris. I’m so sorry you had to see that. God, I hate myself.” Chase choked on his words, feeling his throat constricted with words he was unable to say, because nothing would be enough to convey what he felt - the anguish, the self-hate, the anger. “If I could take it all back... I never... I never...” His voice broke and grey eyes turned silver with unshed tears.

She placed a finger on his trembling lips. “You don’t have to say anything, love. We were both victims, Chase. But we survived. We’ll get through this.” She pulled his head down to her shoulder, her fingers combing through his dark hair while he held onto her as if he was drowning, his body shook with silent tears. “Just know that I love you, Chase. Be patient with me.”

***

“Do we really need a big wedding? Why don’t we get married at court, keep it private?” Christine worried that they wouldn’t be able to afford it anyway, with Chase’s financial situation and her parents just scraping by.

Erica waved her hand dismissively. “You don’t have to worry about a thing, Honey. Leave it to your mother and I. You can give your stamp of approval on everything we arrange. But you just have to show up and look pretty.”

Alexander mumbled something under his breath and incurred a wrathful look from Erica.

“What was that, Alex?”

Alexander knew better than to argue with his wife if she had her mind set on something. “I think we boys need to go out and leave you to it. We’ll only be in the way.”

Chase and Lance couldn’t agree more. The three of them left the women alone to plan the wedding Alexander knew would cost him a small fortune if Erica had her way. Not that he minded. After the argument they had about Hunter, he had a lot to atone for. Besides, he would do anything to see Chase happy and Christine made him happy.

Alexander took Chase and Lance to an Irish pub where he ordered drinks for them.

“I’ll have a soda, thank you, Alexander.” Lance declined, he was working hard on his marriage and staying sober. It was a long road and his relationship with Claire was in a comfortable place. He didn’t want to do anything that might upset it.

“No problem.” Alexander changed the order to three sodas.

Lance smiled, shaking his head. “You don’t have to do that on my behalf.”

Chase grinned back at his father. “Yeah, anyway wouldn’t want to go back stinking of alcohol. I don’t want to piss of the women. Especially not hormonal, pregnant ones.”

“Speaking of… How is she?” Lance asked, “You told me she was having bad dreams?”

Chase was glad Lance brough it up, he was itching to speak to Lance about Christine’s anxiety.

“Yes, it’s been difficult the past weeks. After everything that’s happened.” He shared a look with his father. He wasn’t about to tell Lance about their personal problems though.

“I can’t begin to imagine what my daughter has been through.” Lance sighed, “I just know she has suffered enough.”

Alexander nodded in agreement. “It has been a horrible ordeal for all of us, Lance.”

“Christine was such a happy child, until that day of the accident. She still blames herself for her sister’s death, and no matter how many times we tried to convince her otherwise, her mind just doesn’t want to accept it.” Lance’s mind went back to that day his world came crashing down.

The phone call informed him that his children were injured in a collision. At times he could still hear Claire scream echoing in the back of his mind. Still smell the sickeningly sweet smell of burnt flesh as he entered the morgue. Just thinking about it made him want to drink the memory away.

“They were on their way to Chrissie’s ballet recital.” Lance smiled as he remembered young Christine in her ballet tutu. “We couldn’t go because Claire had an extra shift at the hospital, and I was…” He couldn’t bring himself to tell them that he was at the casino, gambling. If only he had driven them, the accident might not have happened. But what ifs never changed anything.

Chase saw Lance’s body becoming tense. His shoulders were hunched as he leaned forward onto the bar counter.

“It’s alright if you don’t want to talk about it.” Chase said.

Lance’s blue eyes glittered but he blinked a few times. “No, I need to tell you.” He looked away from Chase for a minute. “From what we heard a drunk driver skipped the intersection and crashed into Heather’s car. Chrissie wasn’t wearing her seatbelt at the time, and she went through the front window.”

“Jesus…” Alexander cringed, imagining the tiny body hurtling through the air.

Lance took a gulp of his soda, remembering Christine’s small body covered in bandages. “It was a miracle Christine survived. But Heather’s car smashed into a lamppost. The electric cable snapped. There was fuel leaking…” He wiped his hand over his face, unable to go on.

Chase stopped him. “I’m sorry, Mr. Morrison. I can’t begin to know how painful that was.” That would explain her fear of driving, he thought to himself.

“Christine told us the accident was her fault because she was trying to find her ballet slipper. She’d unclipped her seatbelt to search for it and so distracted her sister.” Lance leaned his elbows on the bar counter and twirled the empty glass between his fingers. “She was eight years old at the time, and so wracked with guilt.”

“That is a heavy burden to bear for such a young child.” Alexander said. “If she didn’t unclip that belt, chances are you would have lost both of them, Lance.”

“I’m grateful she has you and your family, Chase.” Lance offered him a slight smile. “My daughter loves you very much.”

“And love her, Mr. Morrison. I would walk through hell for her and my child.” Whatever it took, Chase thought, he would never give up on her.