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21

Nic

I

 slammed against the door of the safe house covered in blood that wasn’t mine, my body aching, but with a fierce need to hold Leia in my arms. I yearned for her, to comfort her, to know she was truly mine. That she was okay.

And if somebody didn’t let me in the door soon, I’d crash my way right through it. I paused as the sound of a bolt being drawn back scraped over metal on the inside, and the door opened.

Aimée grabbed my arm. “What the fuck are you doing? If you break the door, Leia’s a sitting duck for any of those vampire fledglings who escaped. It’s not like Francois is going to gather them all up and take them home with him.”

I waved a hand, dismissing her concern. “The wolves are feasting on fledgling tonight.”

A movement from the shadows at the other end of the room attracted my attention, and the female wolf shifter came into view. She was naked. “Fledglings?”

“I’m sure if you hurry, there will be some left.” I didn’t have time for pleasantries or conversation. Not with Aimée, not with a naked wolf.

But she didn’t demand anything else of me as she shifted, filling the room with the sounds of cracking bone and snapping sinew as she reformed. Then Aimée opened the door once again and the wolf shot out into the night.

“Leia.” I only needed to say that one word as I looked at Aimée for my answer.

She gestured to the darkest end of the sofa. “Hasn’t moved since we got back. Hasn’t spoken. Hasn’t eaten. It’s like she’s not there.”

“Leia?” I was so used to feeling her inside me somehow, her happiness, her joy… Sometimes her rage or her fear. But now I was just cold.

Cold and empty.

Like a void had opened inside me where my awareness of Leia used to be.

“Leia?” I spoke her name again and moved to sit beside her. I tried to gather her in my arms but she was stiff and unresponsive. “What’s wrong with her?” I looked at Aimée as panic fluttered delicate wings in my chest.

“I think she’s in shock. Did you get him?”

I knew Aimée could only be referring to Francois, but I shook my head and lowered my voice. “The fucker escaped.”

I’d lost him in the chaos created by his hungry fledglings, in my choice to save my most trusted men from their attacks, and then my only thought had been to return to Leia, to comfort her.

And now she seemed to be beyond comfort.

Aimée stood. “Maybe I should leave the two of you out here, see if you can talk to her in private? Call me if you need me, though.” She trailed her hand briefly over my shoulder as she walked by.

“Thanks, Aimée.” But I didn’t look at my sister as she left the room. I only had eyes for my bride, for my true mate, and the way the glow of the moonlight struck her pale face.

I was used to being able to help her, but this time I didn’t know what to do. I took her hand between both of mine. Her skin was cold.

“Can I get you anything?” I didn’t expect an answer and I didn’t get one.

She didn’t even glance in my direction. Her eyes were wide and fixed on the wall in front of her.

“Leia,” I whispered. “I need you to come back. Let me help you.”

When she turned to me, it was in slow motion, but hope still lit in my heart, a tiny wavering flame.

“Let me help you,” I repeated. “I’ll do anything.”

She opened her mouth and made a strangled sound then licked her lips and croaked out her words. “I can’t stay.”

It was a gut punch.

I needed her to stay. She had to stay.

“You can. We can be together.” I knelt in front of her on a scruffy rag rug that had seen better days, taking both of her hands in mine now, and I pressed her knuckles to my lips, breathing in the delicate floral scent of her skin underneath the acrid dried blood. “I’ll do anything.”

“I can’t stay…like this.” Every word seemed to be an effort, and she forced each from her mouth.

“Like what?” The panic threatened to overwhelm me.

But she ignored my question and looked away from me again, moving her head in that same mechanical way as before. “Turn me.”

The words fell flat, landing harsh in the comfortable room.

“What?” Incredulity rang in my tone, and the very thing I wanted most, the occasion I’d thought would be my greatest victory, felt hollow and wrong.

“Turn me,” she repeated. “I’m human and weak. I can’t kill Francois like this.” Her shoulders rose and fell like the shrug punctuated her sentence. “Make me vampire. He needs to die.”

I kissed her knuckles again. “Not like this.” It was a whispered plea.

She looked at me again, but this time the movement was sharper, and her eyes glowed with the light of disdain. “I thought you wanted a vampire bride.”

“For love. Not for vengeance.”

She was asking for the one thing I most wanted to give her, and I couldn’t.

Not this way.

It was wrong. All wrong.

She shrugged again and inhaled a long breath. “That’s okay,” she said as if to herself. “That’s okay.” Her eyes narrowed as she held my gaze. “You’re not the only one.”

“What?” The pain was a physical blow, and I couldn’t form any other words. I fucking was the only one. That was the point of a true mate.

I shook my head, denying her words. She was asking the impossible, talking nonsense. I wanted nothing more than to turn her and keep her at my side.

But this wasn’t a discussion for now.

I started to stand so I could take her into the bedroom and hold her close. Everything would look different after a night’s sleep and after I cleaned her. I wanted to look after her.

But she spoke again, and I dropped back to my knees as the bottom fell out of my world.

“Sebastian will turn me.” The words were simple and light, and even as she spoke them, the truth of them echoed in my heart.

I knew it was true. My brother would do anything for Leia. Even this. Maybe especially this if he still wanted her for himself. He controlled himself well, but would he be able to refuse her if it bound her to him for the rest of their lives? None of us needed the chance to find out.

“Or Francois could do it,” she added darkly. “He could create his very own angel of death.”