Realization

A shrieked scream escaped Bella lips as she saw blood on her bed, her body was a bit sore and she knew something had happened to her.

The scent of Alpha Coast lingered around her room and she wondered why.

“What did he do to me?” he stood in front of the mirror, she had hickeys all over her body and her lip was plump. 

“He raped me” 

Those words escaped her lips like a bolt of lightning but something more strange happened, she began to remember everything that happened yesterday, she was the one who kissed him, she could remember wanting him and allowing him to touch her, she had moaned to his touches and let him taste her.

“No

No

No

No” she couldn’t believe those thoughts, it ought to be fake, it wasn’t real she tried to convince herself, she wouldn’t dare to let him touch her. She would never betray her family by sleeping with him, she couldn’t have slept with the man who murdered her family.

But it was all true and she couldn’t deny it, the scene played in her head like film and she was disgusted by her actions, 

“Why would I do that?” She questioned herself hurt and stupidified, she could still feel his hands all over her body touching her in her most sensitive spots and she shivered at it.

“It can’t be true” she smashed her mirror to the floor making her hands bleed. She wished someone who would tell her that it was all in her head and she was just overreacting but no one came.

Her teeth shaked in fear as she bowed her head to the ground, she felt like she was a disgrace, if her parents could see her now they will be utterly disappointed in her for such act, she hated herself for ever doing that.

“I’m sorry Olive” she cried uncontrollably, she had promised her family that she would take revenge on the man who murdered her family but what did she do, she went ahead to sleep with him giving him her body. 

“I failed you” she cried the more, her mind was lost and she had nothing else to think of except how she was a complete and total fool. 

Everything happened so sudden and she couldn’t take back the mistake she had made. He picked up a broken shard and wanted to kill herself with it, it was better to die than to live with this feeling of guilt for the rest of her live.

At first she wasn’t able to harm Coast neither had she thought of a good plan to kill him then all of this happened. 

“Bella, you can’t kill yourself” Diamond popped out in her head.

“Where were you when he used me” she asked, Diamond was her wolf and her only friend, she would have atleast tried to stop her.

“What you felt was what I also felt” She defended herself, she was also going through heat as Bella was and couldn’t stop Coast.

“That bastard” Bella got up angrily moving fast towards the castle.

“State your business” A guard asked her stopped her by the entrance, Bella wasn’t welcomed into the castle for some reasons she also knew of.

“Get out of my way” she said annoyed by the guard blocking her path, she had so many questions in her mind and so many things she wanted to say and do but he was blocking her.

“You can’t get in Luna without the permission of the Alpha” the guard instructed, Bella was beginning to lose her patience, she wanted to break him into pieces so that he won’t dare to block her path ever again.

“Tell that piece of a shit of a Alpha you have that if he doesn’t let me in then I will cause a scene here until he comes out” The guard was reluctant to relay the message because she had used profane words to address his Alpha, it would be an utter insult to tell him what she had just said.

“You have to leave” he ordered.

“Let her in” Alpha Coast said through the Mind-link, he had seen her coming and he knew it was for him.

“You have some fucking nerves you bastard” she stormed into his room after following his scent all the way there.

Coast’s cold eyes were on her as he stood up from his seat,

“You raped me” she yelled at him.

“I believe you were the one who threw yourself at me” he answered harshly, he had prepared those words in his mind if she ever challenged him. It was true that she was the one who kissed him and he was ready to stand on that fact.

“You knew that I wasn’t myself and yet you used me” she screamed, seeing his face made her more disgusted by what he did to her, if he had atleast resisted her then she wouldn’t feel like thrash and not take herself as a disappointment to her family.

“What if I didn’t know, what if I had mistaken it that you wanted me” he answered her making her rethink if that was really true.

“Could he really have been mistaken” she thought to herself but then shaked her head, there was no way he could have.

“You liar, you raped me” she ran to him and slapped him. It was hurtful that he used her when she was vulnerable but denying that he didn’t know she was much worse.

Coast grabbed her hands,

“What are you making a fuss about, what is the point of being my bride if I can’t have you when I want” he retorted. Her actions was making it look like he had violated her even though they both knew she now belonged to him.

“You can’t have me, you can’t have my body without my permission, I am not yours, I am not your Luna and I certainly not your mate” she answered,

Bella was certainly not a liability to him that he could use as he pleased, she was a person, a lady who had her own rights even though she was sold to him.

“Watch what you say Bella”

Her words angered him greatly, as much as he didn’t want to accept her as his mate, he also didn’t want to hear those words coming from her.

“What, is it hurtful to you that I don’t want you, that I don’t recognize you as my mate, You disgust me. Everything about you revolts me.

After what you did to my family you had the fucking nerves to sleep with me, didn’t you have any sense of guilt, are you that heartless and wicked. 

How could you?” Her eyes became puffy and tears poured out once again.

Just for a split second Coast’s gaze on her soften but then he regained his usual self.

“If you are done, you can leave” he let go of her pointing at the door, 

“I hate you” she slapped him again.

Alpha Coast folded his fist trying to control himself, he wanted so much to punish her for slapping him twice, no one had ever done that but yet again he understood what she was going through and let her be.

“You know what” Bella said slowing pulling a shard of glass she had hid in her pocket, she raised her hand to stab him but he blocked it with his palm and she pierced his hand.

He pulled the glass out of his hand and looked daringly at her, 

“You deserve that” she slapped his chest

“You deserve to fucking die, I hate you” she kept punching him.

Coast grabbed her hands and pinned her to the wall, her eyes locked with his dark eyes and their breathing went in the same motion, 

“Just because you hate me doesn’t mean that your body doesn’t want me” he said,

He lifted her leg and leaned closed to her, his fingers touched her lips and trailed down to her neck, he could hear her heart beating fast and he knew he had that effect on her.

“Your body wants me and there is no denying that” he stated the obvious,

“So don’t you ever think that I can’t have you when I want because I can and I would” he boldly said and then turned his back towards her.

“Leave” he said releasing her,

“Not until I say this” she turned him back to face her,

“I Bella Isaiah reject you as..”