Five

 AFTER

Lily

The foamy waves crash noisily  against the bank. It is a beautiful sight.

The wind tousles my hair and the scent of the ocean is so intoxicating like rich wine, 

I take more steps towards the calling ocean.

My toes are caked with wet sand and goosebumps decorate my arms due to the cold 

but I keep walking until I am ankle-deep in the bone-chilling water.

The water is a dark grey colour, almost black. 

And the sky is the same colour 

as the ocean so they bleed into each other at the horizon.

I know I should not go deeper, 

I'll drown, I can't swim. 

But I do. 

I take another step, 

then another and another 

until I'm knee-deep in the water. The hem of my black summer dress is already soak.

I hear my name in the waves, 

it sounds like a gurgle. 

Then I see her. 

Luc.

She floats towards me, 

emerging from the horizon. 

She looks ethereal; 

the dark waters wrap 

around her limps and 

torso and flow from 

her head into the ocean.

Her mouth opens, 

she calls out to me. 

I want to run but the waters entangle around my ankles holding me still.

She calls my name again, 

this time she is so close 

that I feel the bitter coldness of her breath. 

She grabs my arm 

and drags me with her 

into the dark icy ocean.

I'm crying, pleading. 

The ocean begins to howl, 

pushing me with her 

and I begin to sink. 

~

"Lily, Lily." Warm hands shake me until I wake up. "Sweetie, you are crying." 

The pillow is damp and something rolls off my face onto the pillowcase. She holds me to her and rubs my back. "Are you alright?"

"Yes. I'm fine now." I don't want Nikky worrying about me. At least Luc was not a zombie in the dream. She has let me stay over in her house for an impromptu sleepover because of the heavy rain that caused a flood in half of Calabar. 

Yesterday, Jacob told me that some roads are inaccessible because some trees collapsed across them so they will not be going to church until everything is cleared. Nikky made sure I sleep in her bed instead of the guest room so that her sons won't keep me up at night (her words).

My Mum called yesterday, she was almost crying and I could not understand half of what she was  saying. When I told her that I would sleepover at Nikky's, she asked me to give Nikky the phone and they talked for ten minutes probably discussing how they can keep me from getting pregnant while I'm at Nikky's.

Then Jacob made hot chocolate for James and I, the twins were too engrossed in the cartoon they were watching to give me any of their attention. Nikky borrowed me a sweater and baggy trousers to change into after she ushered me into her bathroom for a hot bath.

I fell asleep on the couch next to James, I remember us talking but I don't remember what we were talking about. Nikky woke me up and lead me to her bedroom.

"You have three missed calls," Nikky says. She picks my phone from the bedside table next to her and hands it over to me. Dad called at eleven pm, apparently Mum gave him the gist of what happened.

It's 4.32am. Dad is probably awake doing one thing or the other concerning his researches. I dial his number, he picks up on the first ring.

"Unwanyen,"  Dad says calling me by my Bette name, it means 'sweet child', "how are you?" My Dad's deep voice makes me calm. I suck in a breath and release with puffed cheeks.

"I'm fine, Daddy. How are you?" My voice is shaky. I picture him sitting hunched over his laptop staring at the screen intently. 

"I'm fine. Your Mum told me what happened, I wanted to know if you are safe." I think I can hear him typing.

"I am," I say, "I miss you, Daddy," I blurt out.

There is a pause. I have never said that to my Dad, I have texted it but not said it. 

"I miss you too," his voice drops many decibels. "I'll come over and pick you up, Krystal too." He is very persistent about me coming to visit him.

"Let me come over so you don't have to drive home then here again." 

"I don't mind," he says.

"I know but I want to, I'm not a child."

"I'll see you at home, Lily," he uses the 'Dad voice'.

"Okay. I'll see you then."

"Bye." The connection ends.

Nikky yawns next to me, she lies back in bed and pulls the duvet higher so it is under her chin.

"Thanks so much, Nikky," I say to her.

Her laugh is slurred. "Quit being so mushy to everyone. Now go back to bed, we wake by six, it is a house rule."

Edwin and Erin wake us by 6.07am. Edwin climbs on his Mummy, whispering softly in her ear and Erin stands next to him in her pink flowery nightdress bearing a tray of freshly baked scones.

"Good morning," Erin says to me with a grin.

"Hey," I reply," James?" I ask pointing to the scones. Erin nods. How does a person wake up early to bake? I can not imagine myself doing that.

Nikky yawns and stretches, kisses Edwin and Erin on their forehead and gives my hand a squeeze. 

"How did you sleep?" I ask. I feel guilty for waking her up with my tears earlier.

"Like a log," she picks a scone and bites it in half, "James should be a chef, I'm going to open a restaurant for that boy."  The skittish giggles of the twins rings off the walls reminding me of Krystal.

I slip away and close the door behind me. 

"Hey." Jacob scratches at his chin, he is wearing a flannel shirt that isn't buttoned properly and oversize pajama trousers that hang too lowly on his hips, his hair is a tangled, knotted mess and his eyes are bleary.

"You had a girl over?" I can't help chuckling.

Jacob rolls his eyes. "Not under my Mother's roof. I couldn't sleep because I could hear your snores all the way from my room, Sleeping beauty." The corner of his lip rises and he wags his brows.

My mouth falls open. "I-I don't snore!"

"You should have heard yourself," he continues with a chuckle, " poor James had to jam two pillows to his ears. That did him no good anyway, why do you think he had scones ready by 5:30am?" 

"Liar." It's the only word I can come up with, I leave to look for James, Jacob's chuckles follow me down the hallway.

James has his broad back turned to me as he bends to slide something into the oven, he is wearing a black tank top despite the chilly weather and pajama trousers.

"Good morning," I say standing by the doorway.

James smiles, the corners of his eyes crinkle and his almond shaped eyes narrow like he is squinting. Honestly, I don't see the resemblance between him and his brother even though they are identical twins, they look like two different people to me.

"You are up early," he says.

"I heard you couldn't sleep." I walk towards him until I reach the countertop, in front of me is a small red velvet cake.

"I have insomnia. Self diagnosed." He laughs under his breath, "and sometimes, I sleep bake." He winks at me.

"Are you sure? Jacob said I kept you guys up with my snoring."

"No, Jacob drove me out of our room with his snoring,"  James tells me plainly, "that's why I'm sleeping in the basement."

I gasp. "There's a basement?" Not many houses in Calabar have a basement.

"I'll show you afterwards if you want."

We have breakfast of coffee and scones with raspberry jam, the twins drink orange juice and James gives me a slice of red velvet cake. If I spend a month here, I'll gain ten pounds.

After breakfast, Nikky goes to "work" in her study. She is business woman, she sells dresses, shoes and accessories from her e-store. The twins go to take their baths, Jacob goes to feed Bobo and James takes me to his basement bedroom.

I expected it to dark and damp like in horror movies but since it's James's room, it is so pristine.

There's only one window that shows a view of the backyard, the window is wide and has a net which James installed himself. The walls are painted white with little drawings on them and the ceiling is sky blue. There's a bed pushed to the wall, a standing fan at one corner, study table with a mountain of books and an array of stationary. He even has a mini fridge and an inbuilt wardrobe. His laptop is on the corner of his bed charging. And a small TV is perched on the wall.

I stand in the middle of the room taking it all in. 

"This is so nice. Like your personal den!" 

"Glad you like it," he says then leans in to whisper," I could sneak you down here sometimes if you want to crash."

I throw my head back and my shoulders quake with laughter.

"I painted the room myself," he sits on the bed and pats the spot next to him.

"You did a great job." I close the space between us, the rug tickles my feet and I sit next to him.

We talk in between changing channels and singing along for an hour then I leave to take a bath and wear my dried clothes, Nikky and the twins cling to me as Jacob and James escort me out.

Dad's Nissan Xterra is parked outside when I get home, I catch a breath when I see his shoes on the foot mat. I realize I miss my Dad at home.

Dad is sitting on the settee next to Mum with Krystal on his lap when I walk in. Seeing them like this gives me hope. Dad looks different; less like my Dad and more like the teenager I see in the black and white photos he used to show Luc and I. He has an afro now and he let his beard grow out. He has lost some weight, he looks younger.

Seeing my parents sitting next to each other and sharing a bottle of beer makes me feel that the separation will be over soon, Dad will move back in and Mum will pull herself back together.

"Lily!" Krystal jumps off Dad's lap and runs - or, more precisely- hobbles to me on his robust bow legs. I swoop him up and hug him to me. It's like I've been gone for a month not a few hours. "I miss you! Mum said you were in Aunty Nikky house."

"Yeah, I went to visit," I tell him.

He frowns but that don't mar his pretty face,"Why didn't you take me?!" 

"I'll take you next time." I kiss his cheek.

"Good morning Daddy, good morning Mummy," I rap.

"You made me worried," Mum's brows meet and she juts out her lower lip, "when I heard that there was a flood and that some people were being carried away by the water, I thought—"

"I know, I'm sorry. The rain just started all of a sudden." 

"Erm, it's okay," Dad gulps down the remaining beer in the tumbler in front of him on the hardwood table pushes the bottle and tumbler away from him before clearing his throat, "Krystal is ready to go, I'm waiting for you."

I don't like the way they are acting as if they can't see each other all of a sudden. I leave to pack a bag.

I throw in some toiletries, my night dress, jeans, top and sandals for school tomorrow. I'm sure Dad will want me back home after school tomorrow.

Mum leans into Dad and pats him on the back and Dad grunts something to her. Even though it's cold, Dad has the AC on. Mum straps Krystal to the back seat, kisses his forehead and murmurs goodbye to Dad.

I expected Dad's house to be messy. Not because Dad is messy but I figured since he is living alone now, he shouldn't bother too much about the order of the house. I was wrong. Dad's house is spotless. The walls are pale yellow and the curtains are beige. There are no portraits on the walls but he manage to mount a wooden bookshelf in the living room. There are two beanbags and one small TV.

The three bedroom echoes when I compliment the furniture. I wonder why he would a big house when he is alone. 

"Make ourself at home," he grins then picks Krystal in his arms and heads to the spacious kitchen.

I choose the room opposite his and begin to unpack Krystal's clothes; his night shorts, school uniform and socks, his school shoes, extra shirt, his towel and body oil. Then I unpack mine. When I'm done, I go to the kitchen to help Dad but he is already done. The aroma of afang soup makes my stomach growl and I see a bowl of garri  on the countertop.

"Daddy, you can cook?!" I can't believe my eyes.

Dad laughs a deep belly laugh, he throws his head back and his square shoulders shake and Krystal joins in, he giggles and his dimples deepen.

"Of course I can cook. Your Mum just didn't let me cook after we got married. I cook every weekend and put it in the freezer," he says when he recovers from the laughter and points to the big white freezer at the corner of the kitchen.

Staying here won't be so bad.