49.1 EVERSON

Sierra remained in our home for several months after I graduated from high school. I know my behaviors were perplexing, but we had gotten to the point where we treated Sierra as if she were a member of our family. We were used to seeing her cooking in the kitchen, resting by watching TV in the living room, sleeping in my bedroom, and asking me to buy her new books. It was as if we'd become accustomed to her presence in an instant, and we'd grown so attached to her that we didn't know what we'd do if she left. Or maybe it was just me who had really become so attached to her that even when I was away, she never left my mind.

Still, there weren't many days when I didn't wonder if my decision to keep her was the right one, but I also don't understand why I couldn't make her leave. Until the day arrived when I no longer questioned her absence and her entire identity. And, to be honest, after Archer left the country, I felt even better; it was as if all I wanted to do was make Sierra feel safe in my arms. We were more at ease than before, and even though Sierra was still considered dead in most people's minds, at least I could feel her in my arms and know she was secure with me.

"I'm going to take architecture." I told Sierra when she asked what course I'd be taking in college when we were both staring out my bedroom window at the night sky.

"Yeah, I knew it all along; why did I even ask?" She laughed at herself. "Plus, I know you'll be able to get into all of the universities you apply to since you're smart, hardworking, and, most importantly, fantastic at drawing." She winked at me and smiled broadly.

"You're extolling me far too much." I laughed.

"What? I'm merely stating the obvious: you're great at everything except cooking." She began to laugh at me, but then she bit her lower lip as she considered something. "Seriously, if you just kept acting, you'd be a hot teen actor right now. Because of her joke, I gently poked her arm."

"I've already passed that." I said, and I now cringe when I recall the days when we were filming our school films.

I don't even know what suddenly went into my mind that made me join the drama club; all I remembered was I wanted to try almost every hobby in the world, but acting was the last thing to ever cross my mind. Maybe it was only a phase of mine, or maybe it was destiny that drew me closer to her.

"Come on! What's that expression on your face? It's as though you're now mocking those good old days! Aren't you even proud of our films before?" She kept teasing me and even pinched my cheeks, making me wince. "And, to be honest, I miss the days when you were ignoring me and I had no idea what you were feeling for me." She gave me a big smile before letting go of my face.

She was now teasing me about my past unrequited love for her. We had also grown accustomed to talking about it; what she knew on this day was that I no longer had feelings for her—but she was mistaken, because every time I see her, my affections for her just get stronger.

"Stop it," I murmured, trying hard not to laugh.

"Fine, but honestly, if you become a celebrity, your name will really stand out and people will easily get to know you."

"Why? Because I had nearly the same name as a well-known American football player? " I said, jokingly.

Sierra's forehead furrowed at me. "You have a similar name to a famous person?" Then her eyes rounded in astonishment, and I sensed she was oblivious to it.

I simply nodded at her. "Yeah, I was also late in discovering that, but his surname is Griffen, and he has the letter 'e', whereas mine has the letter 'i.'"

"But still, I really like your name, and even the sound of it whenever I call you. I always encounter the name "Emerson," but "Everson"? You are the first person that I know who has that name." Sierra's eyes blinked, and she returned her gaze to the sky, "but what does your name even mean?"

"Oh, you're really curious?" I sounded as though I was daring her to try something new. She looked at me with a big smile that was tinged with skepticism.

"Yeah, I'm sure Aunt Mary had a knack for coming up with names." She grinned.

I rubbed my brow before speaking, "It's not like my name has any deeper meaning; when I was a little kid, I remember questioning my mother why she named me 'Everson', because my playmates started calling me 'Ever', and it became my nickname ever since, which sounded so feminine to me; I was just young and naive at the time, so I thought that way." I paused. "I remembered mom telling me to sit in the chair and gently told me that 'Ever' is synonymous with the word 'Always'. Then she came up with it because she wants to always be by my side, always supporting me. No matter what happens to me, she will never abandon me. In a nutshell, it's as if she was saying, 'Always, son.'" When I was reminiscing about that moment, I had a real smile on my lips. I then looked down at Sierra and found her staring right into my eyes.

"It's beautiful." Sierra mumbled under her breath, her lips half-smiled.

"I know, and ever since then, I've been in love with my name." I joked but she didn't laugh.

I returned her smile, but hers didn't last long; her eyes fluttered several times before she returned to staring out the window. I noticed that the glow in her face had faded; I couldn't tell what was going through her head, but the way her eyes glistened piqued my interest in what she was thinking.

I walked closer to her and leaned on the window sill to try to get rid of the awkwardness that had come up between us.

"And do you know what your name means?" Sierra shifted her gaze to the left and placed her palm on her face, as if wiping something away. And I know she was on the verge of tears, but I'm not sure why.

"H-How would I know?" Her voice was shaking, but she managed a shaky laugh. Perhaps her abrupt emotional outburst was caused by the realization that she had never met her parents, or even who gave her name, and that she would never have the opportunity to have an intimate conversation with them.

"It's a Spanish word that means "mountain," and it connotes strength." When I said those, I felt a surge of delight in my heart.

"How did you find out?" Sierra shook her head and chuckled again just as I was about to say something else. I forgot that I told you a while ago that you are smart. Of course, you could have been aware of everything." Because of her hyperbole, I shook my head.

"You're a fighter." I said, catching her off guard. Her eyes twitched, but given the expression on her face, she didn't seem to notice.

"Sierra?" I called her name while she was still staring at the sky, and I was the one who broke the stillness that had been lingering between us for about a minute.

"Hmm?"

"May I ask you a question?" Sierra glanced at me, taken aback; it seemed as if every time I asked her a question, she felt apprehensive, as if she was afraid that I was going to bring up her problem again.

"Do you have any plans for yourself?" I asked her. She was still taken aback by my question, and it took her a few seconds before she chuckled trembling and began shaking her head.

"Of course I did." She simply stated; she put her arms on top of the windowsill."

"Just like what?"

"Just like eventually repaying you for everything you've given me and everything you've risked just to protect me," I watched her as her gaze wandered to the sky. After she said it, she looked at me and gave me a somewhat satisfied grin. She then took and held my hand by surprise.

"How about you continue your studies instead?" I suggested.

Sierra simply pursed her lips before sighing, "perhaps another time." I was ready to complain to her when she spoke up again.

"Thank you for taking me back as your friend, Everson, despite all the problems I've caused you and all the broken promises I've made."

I chuckled, my brow twisted in perplexity, "all right? Why are you saying these out of the blue?"

"Nothing. I'm simply a little embarrassed since I'm still here in your house, but I also want to thank you for all of your help and for respecting my wish to remain silent about anything that bothers me." Sierra gazed at my hands as she caressed them.

"I have many plans in life, but my fears are preventing me from carrying them out. One of my goals is to conquer my fears before taking further steps. And guess what? I have a feeling that I'm about to accomplish that."

After hearing those words from her, it was as if a new hope had grown within me. Was she saying she'd tell me the truth sooner?

"All I ever wanted for you, Everson, was to be happy all the time and to be successful in whatever field you chose. Nonetheless, I am constantly happy for any achievement you achieve in your life. I will always be your staunchest fan!"

"What do you have in your mind that you're becoming figurative again?" I held her hands and drew her close to me, grabbing her by the waist while chuckling.

She only shook her head at me before speaking again, ignoring my question. "To be honest, I'm not sure what I'd do if you weren't in my life right now." She pulled me into a tight embrace, and we stayed like that for minutes.

"Sierra?" She immediately responded with a hum.

"Please never leave my side again. I know I kept pushing you away in the past, but even after all that has happened to you, I hope you will still stay with me." My eyes squinted as I waited for her reply. It took her many seconds to make my heart skip a beat.

"Always, Ever." A smile appeared on my lips as I sank my head onto her shoulder, and I could feel her hands caressing my back.

I kissed her on the forehead; I'm used to the two of us being so close, and I've come to accept that she can only consider me a friend, and I was fine with it as long as she was there with me. That night, I was happy with what we had at the time.