Chapter 6

Ivan's POV

While I'm eating, Clair can't for the life of her stop talking.

I don't know who told her that being this clingy when were are not even in a relationship is cute because it definitely isn't.

She keeps touching me in inappropriate places and I normally wouldn't care but honestly I am debating reminding her that we're at freaking school and not a freaking night club.

"Would you stop fucking touching me, Clair I'm trying to eat here" I say gritting my teeth.

She immediately stops and her face reddens in embarrassment while others at the table snicker.

I am eating my food when I look at Daniel eating opposite me and inhaling his own.

We make eye contact and he sees the look of disgust on my face when we hear a commotion at the other end of the cafeteria.

Both Dan and I look over at the commotion and see a girl I haven't seen around school before arguing with Ashley Ross I think her name is and Clair's sister on the ground.

Looks like the new girl is defending Violet.

I look over at Clair kind of expecting her to go to her little sister but she looks conflicted. Like she's unsure wether she should go stick up for her sister or not. Sadly, this isn't the first time this happened. Violet was bullied a lot last year too and Clair would always just do nothing.

I will never get how she can just sit there and do nothing while her sister is in pain.

However, it looks like Ashley is backing off and the new girl is sitting with Violet now. That's good.

I look over at Clair again and see her continuing to eat her food and I shake my head in disappointment. Clair never fails to disappoint.

If I saw my sister getting bullied I'd make the life of whoever bullied her a living hell. And I would not hesitate, I wouldn't look conflicted, I'd...protect her.

But I can't do that, all I can do is hope that she's okay out there.

Francisca's POV

*after school*

Violet already left a few minutes ago, I asked her for her number and she hesitantly gave it to me, she told me that having a friend is kind of new to her before she left, she asked to bear with her, but I honestly had no issue at all.

I had no friends until Lori and Jenny, and I'm excited to get to know her better.

Right now though I'm waiting for Matt to come pick me up while also kind of sort of hiding from my brothers and by hiding I mean leaning against the school wall and watching the doors for when my brothers get out.

I am also kind of hoping to see dad come pick them up too.

I'm "hiding" and then I see Ivan and Daniel getting out. I swear to god, I feel myself stop breathing.

I quickly turn around so I now can only hear their voices.

I hear Ivan sigh and say "why don't you wipe that grin of your face,Dan". Ivan says.

"I'm just excited for dinner with dad today" I hear Dan say while chuckling.

There is a pause and then Ivan speaks again.

"Dad rarely eats dinner with us, I wouldn't get my hopes up". Ivan says.

What is Ivan taking about? Why not?

"Dad said he's trying to do better remember?" Dan says.

"You don't actually believe that do you?" Ivan says.

"Why wouldn't I?" Dan asks sounding upset.

"Dad can't just suddenly decide to be a decent father,Dan"Ivan replies angrily. "It's stupid to think otherwise". He continues.

There is a pause and then...

"And why the hell not? He's been going through some stuff Ivan! We all have for years now! And now dad wants to make it better! He's willing to try and fix what's broken! So, yes I'm looking forward to seeing what he's going to do! I'm looking forward to possibly getting my dad back! To be somewhat a normal family!"

I hear Ivan laugh at what Dan says, and my heart sinks.

"You're really naive Dan, you really are, isn't that exactly the kind of attitude you had when mom and Francisca first left?" Ivan says. "Weren't you also this annoyingly positive? So sure that they'll be back? And how did that turn out for you huh?!" Ivan yells.

Silence

that is all I hear, then I see Dan heading away from Ivan, away from school grounds.

"Dan come on!" I hear Ivan yell.

"Dan!" He says again running after him.

Soon enough they are both out of sight.

That...was a lot.

They aren't...happy, I mean of course they aren't they lost their mother and sister, they are obviously not okay with that.

How could I have been so stupid?

How could I think that they wouldn't care about me being gone?

How could I question their love?

I can't help but feel guilty for feeling all those feelings, I can't help but feel guilty for not going to them and telling them that I'm right here.

But then I think of Matt and I-ugh I don't know what to do.

I am snapped out of my thoughts when I hear Matt calling me from his car.

I head to the car, Matt hugs me and starts asking me about my day.

"Yeah it was great Matt, I made a friend" I say.

"You did? That's great! You're new school year is starting of great!" He said looking excited.

"Yeah..." I say. A sad look must be obvious in my face because Matt looks at me in concern and asks if I'm okay.

"Yeah yeah I'm fine". I say but he looks totally unconvinced.

"Did something happen?" He asks.

And I actually debate wether or not I should tell him about my brothers attending the same school.

Maybe....maybe I'll tell him eventually but now is not the right time.

But when would be the right time?

Dan's POV

Ivan, dad and I are currently sitting at the dinning table eating.

I knew we would eat with him today, I'm glad I proved Ivan wrong.

I look over at Ivan and see him looking annoyed, I mentally roll my eyes.

I decide to make conversation a little bit and said the first thing that came to mind.

"Do you guys think Francisca had a sweet sixteen?" And then I realized what I just said.

Both my dad and Ivan had this look on their faces that just said "you're a fucking idiot" and of course Ivan wasn't letting my idiocy go.

"Are you fucking kidding me Dan!" Ivan said with a clenched jaw.

Okay yeah I fucked up, I shouldn't have brought up Fran especially when tensions are running high, what I said was totally random and I shouldn't have said anything about her last birthday.

"Ivan". My dad warned.

Ivan just glared at him and was about to say something when I spoke up instead.

"I'm sorry". I said " I shouldn't have said anything".

"Yeah you shouldn't have" Ivan says glaring at me.

Honestly Francisca is a sore topic for obvious reasons, I always find myself thinking about her and randomly bringing her up, it's always awkward after that. Nether dad or Ivan want to talk about her, it's like it's forbidden and I get why they don't want to, it hurts thinking about what happened, it hurts thinking about how she's not here right now.

But I want to talk about her, all the time, I feel like talking would actually do some good, and you know what, since dad is changing things around here and being here more, I want to change some things too, I want us to be able to talk about Francisca freely, I want to even discuss the possibility of searching for her again.

I know dad already searched heaven and earth for her when she first disappeared with mom and found nothing, but maybe we could try again.

"But....I want to talk about Fran more". I say looking down at my plate. When I look up, I see Ivan still very much glaring at me and his jaw is clenched.

I look over at dad and he has this look in his eye that makes me feel like he's thinking about what I'm saying and then his eyes soften when he looks at me.

"So talk". Dad says and I'm surprised he agreed so quickly, dad never talked about Fran or mom or what happened after the search didn't work out, he just closed himself off completely and I saw the hope and confidence he had in the beginning when he started looking for them dim and disappear.

"Really?" I ask, still not quite believing this. This is progress!

Dad nods and Ivan scoffs.

"You wanna talk fine let's talk!" Ivan yells. "Let's talk about how Francisca clearly could've reached out but apparently chose not to" Ivan continues.

I see my dad stiffen, but I don't get where Ivan is getting at.

"Francisca was ten years old when she left, ten!" He says. "She could've contacted us at any time in those years she's been away, maybe at first she couldn't do anything with mom controlling what she does online but you can't tell me that sixteen year old Francisca can't get on I*******m, find one of our accounts and dm one of us if she really wanted to". I thought he'd stop talking but he didn't he continued " a simple G****e search and she would find out where we are, where the company is, she has ways! She has ways to contact us! But we never heard anything from her, not even once!" Ivan's voice cracks at the end, it really seems like he's thought about that a lot.

Ivan....well he kind of left me speechless here, but he's right, I actually never thought about that before, I have always been thinking about us finding her, not her finding us, could Francisca really not want to be found, not want to see us, did mom tell her something?

I look over at dad and see a frown on his face, he looks quite saddened by what Ivan just said, but I think he knows he has a point too.

"We don't know anything about Francisca's life or how it has been" dad says. "We don't know what your mother might have said to her, she could've told her that we didn't want her".

"Bullshit!" Ivan cries. "Francisca isn't that stupid, she wouldn't believe we would abandon her, I don't buy it"

"Sometimes son, when someone tells you something so many times no matter how absurde it may seem, you eventually begin to believe it". Dad says.

"You really think mom would say that to her? Wouldn't that crush Francisca especially as a child?" I say.

Dad shrugs and there is a sad look in his eyes "how else would she keep Francisca from asking questions" it wasn't a question, we kind of concluded that Francisca might be thinking the worst of us right now, which really upsets my stomach.

Now I want to find her even more to clear things up. She can't believe that we don't want her, that we don't love her, because we do, more than anything we want her back.