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The Truth
Last Updated:
2023-07-24 18:46:08
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Seductive Vibrations Book 2 Enticing Touch Blocked Pleasure
Standing up, I start stripping. I grab the blindfold and put it on, then stand here naked in the corner, waiting. My heart is pounding in my chest, the sound of a drum counting down the seconds for me.“What do you want, Alena?” His voice is quiet. He isn’t his usual self. Typically, when he asks that, he has humour there, knowing that he already knew what I needed.“I want you, like before. I want you like we used to be, no pain, no worries.” I stand waiting for his reply.“I am not sure that is a good idea. I hurt you, upset you and broke you. I saw your face, how much you hated yourself and me.”“No, don’t think of it like that. If I say the safe word, will you stop Jackson?” I hear him moving closer to me as I ask.“Yes, always, no matter what I am doing, I would stop.” Which I know, and that is why, last time, it was my fault.“I promise, if you got too far, I will say it. I won’t hold it in. I won’t ignore the pain, the hurt. I will say it. I promise.” I know I will. After the l
Last Updated : 2023-07-24Seductive Vibrations Book 2 Enticing Touch Releasing Him
“What do you need? Whatever it is, Jackson, take it, take everything. I am offering everything. We can try again. I know what to do, and I won’t hold back this time. If I have to say the safe word, I won’t hold it in.” His eyes look at mine, his head shaking.“Jackson, I need you, I need you right now. You’re driving me insane. The thought of you hard is driving me insane.” It is; I have never left him hard, never, and I don’t plan to now.“You might want to change your mind. This will be the last chance you get. I don’t want your pretty ass to run away after this.” He takes another step closer, never taking his eyes off me. I stand, waiting. I will at least try this for him.“I am going to fuck you….” his head shakes, and he smirks, “No, I am going to abuse you, and you will fucking love it because you’re a dirty little fucking slut.” His words come out like curses. Still, like every other time, there is love in them. It isn’t full of hate, like the other day.“Don’t even think abou
Last Updated : 2023-07-24Seductive Vibrations Book 2 Enticing Touch Fantasy
“So, come on, fantasy, what is it? I know you said to dominate a woman, which you seem to be able to do freely and easily. What are your others?” He looks at me, smiling. “Oh, and when will you be seeing Roxy again?” His smile is getting bigger.“Roxy, I will see when things settle down, just like my fantasy can wait.” We have a lot more important things to sort out than this.“Stop avoiding and answer. I want to know what they are, all of them, why and how you feel about them. Otherwise, I will just lock you in here and turn you into my slave.” His words are teasing me. I feel he has found himself, at least a little bit.“My fantasies are pretty out there, wild and crazy when I think about them. My heart pounds so fast, I get sweaty and imagine them, wondering how it would feel, almost begging myself to do it.” I glance at him before continuing.“You have your own fantasies. You know how it feels. It is like a need for something you can’t get. You are physically unable to get it; it
Last Updated : 2023-07-24Seductive Vibrations Book 2 Enticing Touch Happy Moments
“By the way, Liam was asking about what you guys do. Apparently, Jackson doesn’t discuss it much with him, but then he decided to ask me if I would want to try it out sometimes.” She laughs, her hand covering her eyes like she is trying to hide from the idea.“What did you say?” I am keen to know if she is open to it or open to trying anything, even just the bondage side of BDSM.“I said I had no idea, I would need to think about it, but thought talking to you would be best, as you do it. How’s the blog going anyway? I have not looked at it yet. I’m too scared of what I might see or read.”“Well, you can ask me anything, but honestly, Jackson is the one who knows most. The blog is crazy. I am getting so many messages and comments, everyone asking me questions. I feel way out of my depth, to be honest.”“Yeah, after today, I highly doubt I would be able to ask Jackson anything like that. You should see it as a good thing, you’re empowering other women to be more open with sex and shit.
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Getting to the hospital, I see he is right. Marcus is lying there, breathing on his own, but not opening his eyes. I look at Maria. She looks so withdrawn, pale and unwell. “Go home for a bit Maria. Get some proper sleep in a bed, and Jackson can call if anything happens.” I feel awful for her, knowing the feeling of this after thinking Jackson was dead. I would be surprised if she leaves, but at least he is breathing on his own.That is a good thing. She nods, getting up from the chair, unsteady on her feet. Jackson wraps his arm around her.“I will walk you to the car. Are you sure you can drive?” Jackson looks at her, worried by how weak she looks.“I will be fine but, thank you.” She walks out and we sit here in silence for a short while. “Are you sure you were okay with yesterday?” Turning, I look at Jackson. “After the other day, Alena, you looked broken. I don’t want you to be lying if I hurt you again.” I look at him, shaking my head.“You want to talk about it now?” I look
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He stays smiling at me.“Well, I am still grateful, for everything, for you coming to the house and helping us, for you keeping Jackson sane while I was missing, and for taking a bullet for him. I can’t say I kept him grounded. I had never seen him like that before; he changed a lot.” I think back to how he was those first two times in his playroom.“What do you mean, you never saw him like that before? How did he change?” I look at him, wondering how much is too much. Should I be discussing this with him?Then I remember he has seen the videos, the pictures of Jackson and me; he has known Jackson for years and knows him better than I do.“He was a mess, screaming and crying uncontrollably. He wouldn’t talk. He sat in the same spot for hours. Then, when he finally moved, and I tried everything to break him out of the shell, he blamed himself for you being shot.” My memories flood back, him crying that he kil
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How am I going to be able to look Jackson in the eye? How can I act like nothing happened? I need to forget Marcus, forget today, forget how hot he is, and forget that he made me so wet within seconds. How did he manage that?I am scared, scared of going home, scared of facing Jackson. I don’t want to ruin his relationship with Marcus, and I also don’t want to hide this from him. How can I pretend like nothing happened? Like Marcus did not just try it on with me?Walking into the house, I look in his direction. He is so happy. How could I destroy that? I really shouldn’t. I can’t destroy his happiness. Nothing happened, exactly. I will keep it to myself for as long as I can. It isn’t just about Jackson and me, or even Marcus, but his wife Maria, she loves him, and the thought of hurting her, the thought that he would do that to her, even though she approves, just doesn’t feel right.Jackson turns. He is smiling, so happy
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It is getting to be early morning. Sitting here, the silence surrounding me, I hear the door. I move to get out of bed. No, I shouldn’t go to him. I should wait until he comes here, wait until he is ready to see me and talk about it.I move back onto the bed, sitting, waiting.The bedroom door swings open, hitting the wall with a thud, and he slams it closed, kneeling at the side of the bed next to me like he is surrendering to me. I move to the edge of the bed, and his head drops onto my lap.I have no idea what has happened or what to say. My body has frozen. My mind is unable to talk yet. My hand is resting on his head, waiting ‘til I can find any words to say.“What happened?” The silence finally breaks from my words. I hate that I put him through so much pain in just a few short years. He would not have had any issues if he never met me.“Nothing. By the time I got there, I had calmed down. Sorry for storming out. I didn’t want to fight with you.”It makes no sense. Why would he
Last Updated : 2023-07-26
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Sitting, we talk about the wedding and her plans, ideas and what she wants. “So, I have kept quiet for an hour, talk.” Looking at her, I know what she means but I am not sure I want to talk about it, yet I haven’t really spoken about it. “I don’t know what to say. It has happened and now I am trying my best to move forward.” I am. It is hard but I am slowly getting there. “Well, talk to me about the last few minutes with him, because the first I heard of what was said was in the church.” Sitting, I talk about those last moments, explaining how it was then that I realised just how much I loved him. It was still nothing compared to how much I love Jackson, but it is still a lot more than I admitted to before. Sitting, it actually feels nice talking to Georgina. When I am trying to talk to Jackson, I am scared my feelings for Marcus might hurt him. “Anyway, Liam mentioned the will. I am guessing that was a shock.” Nodding, it was, and no amount of time will make it feel alright
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Sitting, we wait for the solicitor. When he arrives, we sit down to discuss everything. Everyone is happy with the will and we each sign. It feels weird. My signature just made me have 1.8 million pounds for the business, but if it helps women and men who suffer domestic abuse, why not? Everyone leaves and we sit down to eat tea. Our bags are packed ready to leave. “I was thinking, I know the will stated for the business, but could it be used to support other people, not just those who suffered domestic abuse?” Looking at him, he shrugs his shoulders. “I am not sure. The money will be paid into the business account, but I guess it depends on what you were thinking about?” How do I explain this? My mind finds the words and tries to get them in the right order so that it makes sense. “I want to do something similar but for those who have lost someone in the army, navy or similar, or through cases like Marcus’s.” I want something there to support these people, the ones like me who d
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The day has been tiring. Getting home with the bags, I am ready for bed. We spent hours walking around shops getting the things we needed. The girls practically have a full wardrobe of holiday clothes thanks to Jackson. Getting in, we get the girls ready for bed. Sitting together, I read them a story each, the ones Marcus bought them with their own names in. Finishing, we put them in their cots. Walking out, we close the door quietly as they fall asleep. “I was thinking, Liam and Georgina were asking about the holiday and coming along. I understand if you say no. They will be in a hut away from us, but Georgina suggested they come for one or two nights there. They would have the girls for us.” It sounds like a good idea, us all together but separate. We could maybe even get a girls’ night in with me and Georgina, and Jackson and Liam can go out. “What about Helen? Sorry, your mum.” She isn’t well, and I don’t like the idea of her flying or being left alone. “I am going to pay f
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Opening the drawers, I pull out his clothes. Folding them, I put them in a suitcase. With all his clothes away, I move onto one of the trunks. Opening it, I am shocked. It is a range of toys, all different. I had no idea he had brought it all here, but it has me wondering, would he have been sitting looking at these wishing he could use them with me? Does he have a favourite like Jackson? Getting to the bottom, there is not much in here, just his own toys, whips and things. Putting it back, I don’t even know what we would do with these. Opening another trunk, there is an envelope on top. Opening it, I start to read it. Marcus is divorced. He told us they were going through it but never mentioned it being made official. Putting it to the side, I find more letters, nothing important. Then I see a solicitor one, with the word ‘Will’ on it. I won’t open this. I can’t. Placing it to the side, I leave it for Jackson. Another envelope, this one with my name on. It isn’t small; it is b
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Jackson is standing with a woman, one of Marcus’s submissives. She looks upset and hurt, not like Maria. Standing, I watch. They stand talking, her eyes filled with tears. It just shows how amazing Marcus was and how loveable. The rest of the day goes ahead slowly. Sure enough, Maria left after Troy told her she had no right to be there. Jackson spent most of his time by my side. The team were amazing and constantly checking on me. Getting home, the girls are already in bed. Helen hugs us before saying bye and leaving with Liam and Georgina. I don’t feel like I have said goodbye. With everyone there, I couldn’t say what I wanted without some asking questions. It still feels weird here without Marcus around us. Sitting at the table, I now understand what he meant. I did the same thing the past week: me pretending my life didn’t exist. Jackson sits opposite me and his hands grasp mine. “You are the only person he told that to, you know? I checked. None of us knew why he stared i
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Walking downstairs, everyone is here: the whole team, Marcus’s other friends, and a few women. I don’t know who they are yet I feel I want to know. Walking to Jackson’s side, he wraps his arm around me. “We should walk around and say hi. I will introduce you to people he knew that you have not met.” Nodding, I agree. I should know who these people are. “How will you introduce me? What will you introduce me as in regard to Marcus and exactly how much do the team know?” Jackson turns, looking at me in surprise. Whether that is at my questions or the fact that is the most I have spoken in days, I don’t even know. “Well, I will introduce you as my wife and the closest person to Marcus before he passed. The team know everything. I had to tell them about it all. Explaining why you are this broken by him dying would not work by lying, Alena.” The closet person to Marcus…he used to be the closet person to Marcus. Had that changed? We start walking around the room, Jackson introducing
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Jackson walks back through towards me. Turning on the kettle, he grabs two cups. “She doesn’t want to do anything. She said it is up to the team to plan his funeral.” As I thought, she does not care about him at all, not even now in his death. “I want to help with the funeral.” Maybe helping will help me. I don’t even know if it will but surely it is worth a try? Jackson hands me the cup of tea. Walking to the sofa, we sit, his arm around me. “I don’t want you to be strong for me, Alena. Yes, I am hurting, a lot, but seeing you broken is what is keeping me going. I can’t be weak when you need me.” I don’t even know what to say anymore. I just want to hide away. “Whatever you want, Alena. Whatever you need to get you through this, I will do.” I don’t even know what I want or need right now. “Marcus mentioned a plan for that night, something for me. What exactly was it?” Maybe knowing this will help. Maybe it won’t but I won’t know until I ask. “Well, I heard you talking to hi
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He walks back in. Sitting next to me, his hand grips mine. “Alena, you didn’t let him down and you certainly did not kill him. Remember his last words: that he was happy because of you and no one else. You made him happy. That should be enough for you to realise.” Nodding, I agree. He did say that. “It won’t help bring him back, though, and he still died because of me. Everyone will hate me. I saw the way Troy looked at me. He tried smiling and couldn’t. Even he blames me.” What a year this has started out to be: New Year’s Day and we already have a death. “Stay here.” Jackson walks out. I see him talking to the team. They all look towards me and then back to Jackson. Walking back to me, Jackson is followed by them all. Walking into the room, I prepare myself for their abuse and the blame. “Alena, we don’t blame you at all. I tried smiling. The only reason I couldn’t is because you look more hurt and broken by this than any of
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Everyone walks in. The police come, asking me questions. I can see their lips moving but there is no sound, no sound just silence and Marcus’s last words on replay. I watch as Troy, Alexander and the other lads come in, all staring at me, unsure what to say. Jackson gives me space. My heart breaks seeing every one of their faces, the pain of the loss. Hours pass by, everyone walking around and talking but I take none of it in. “Alena, go get a shower. Please, do something.” Jackson kneels in front of me, but I can’t move. I can’t go away. I can’t do it. “I don’t know how to help her.” Jackson’s words are quiet. No one can help. Marcus has gone. I watched it myself. He isn’t coming back. This isn’t like Jackson, where there is nobody, no proof. I saw the body, felt it drain of blood and turn cold in my hands. “Marcus would be the one to tell me what to do.” Jackson’s head lowers. Marcus was more than his friend, and his brot
