There was a female student in the next class named Lilac Hawthorn. She was a new transfer student from a different city. She had a small frame and a round face and wore her hair short. Every time she smiled, two dimples would appear on her cheeks that made her look sweet and endearing.I saw her walking with Felix many times at school. I'd stare and stare at their hands that always seemed to be intertwined. My heart would break each time I saw them together.The day after SATs, I saw Felix pulling her to a corner and telling her that he would go to the same college she was going to. He said that he wanted to be her knight in shining armor and protect her for the rest of his life.When I heard that, I swore my heart felt like it was smashed into a million pieces.There was only so much time and energy one could spend on others. Since Felix decided to be Lilac's knight in shining armor, there was no way he could also be my guardian angel at the same time. It was just a feeble attempt
Just before I clicked the "Submit" button, I changed my preferred college to another one up north called Lincoln University. That university was famously known for its watercolor courses and had produced many renowned watercolor artists in the country.Since I didn't want to go to Jesselton College, Lincoln University was my next best choice.Uncle Austin and Aunt Mel both asked me if I applied to Jesselton College. I managed to bluff my way through without giving any definite answers.Finally, it was the day that college and university applications were out. I received my acceptance letter in the mail. And I spent a good chunk of that day in a daze. I just couldn't come out of it.I wasn't in the same league as he was, after all. My acceptance letter had now cemented that fact. This was another feat in clearly drawing the boundaries between the two of us.Felix brought his acceptance letter and ran into my house. He then insisted on looking at mine."Luna, please show me your ac
They said mothers knew best. Well, Mom wiped her tears away on my shirt and said, "I did some research online and learned that Lincoln University is a great place for you. Their watercolor fine arts course is more famous than the one at Jesselton College."Remember to study hard and do your best to get your master's degree and doctorate there, okay? Your father and I will be retiring soon. If you decide to stay there for work, we can both move there to accompany you. Your dad will have fun experiencing the four seasons up in the north, especially winter.""Why are you crying? Isn't Colin there as well? He's a lot more reliable than Felix, and he also takes good care of Luna. With him around, Luna won't feel excluded."I knew that Mom and Dad loved me and were worried about me. Their words managed to put me at ease.Back then, I had been so focused on leaving Felix behind that I did my own research and followed my guts. I'd totally forgotten that Uncle Austin had another older son w
We gradually stopped contacting each other after that. Sometimes, we'd go up to half a month without saying anything to each other.He had a girl he liked by his side, after all. I didn't want to cause any misunderstandings between them. I also didn't want to distract their lives just because I couldn't control my emotions. That was why I never made the first move to contact him, no matter how much I missed him.It was hard to cut back on contacting him, but I needed to move on.I swore I had to get over him by hook or by crook.When it was almost time for winter break, he texted me once, asking me when I'd be going home.I stared at the single line of text on my phone for the longest time ever. My mind was conflicted. I didn't know if I should feel sad or happy.I thought I'd forget him as long as I didn't see him or think about him.However, when his familiar profile photo popped up again on my messaging app, telling me I had unread messages from him, my mind started wandering
I felt a pang in my heart. The sweet, juicy watermelon immediately turned sour in my mouth.I kept my silence as I frowned and tossed the watermelon skin back onto the table. Then, I wiped myself clean with the towel.Was that a harmless insult? Or did he really look down on me that much?He was perfect. As someone who'd had a crush on him for the longest time ever, how much harder did I have to work to shift my affection to somebody else?I didn't know if I was destined to spend the rest of my life alone while waiting and hoping that my childhood sweetheart would finally come to his senses."Felix White, you're a meanie. Can't you stop being so cruel to me?" I whined inwardly.It was bad enough that he didn't like me. But he didn't have to rob me of my peace either.Please, could he just leave me the fuck alone?…Both our families still spent Christmas Eve together.Mom, Dad, and I were all quickly ushered over to Uncle Austin's house early in the morning. Mom then looked a
He tossed my phone back at me, and I caught it neatly. I managed to catch a glimpse of frustration on his grumpy face.My head started hurting. All of a sudden, I didn't know how I was supposed to spend the rest of my winter break with him around.If I got close to him, he would feel disgusted and get sick of me. But if I kept my distance from him, he then said that I was a killjoy who didn't know how to take a joke.Whatever I did, he would always find a way to criticize me.After getting my phone back, I wasn't in the mood to continue watching the movie anymore. Instead, I found myself over-analyzing the words he told me just now."You girls are all the same overthinking species."He used the plural form of "girl", which meant he was referring to me and at least someone else. But then again, it wasn't hard to guess who else he was referring to. First of all, he used to be quite anti-social since he was young and hated talking to females. I was the only exception. As of now, t
Good times always seemed to fly by. Before I knew it, it was time for a new semester.With Mom's and Aunt Mel's insistent interventions, I booked a ticket that was on the same day as Felix's.When we reached the airport, Lilac was standing at the roadside, craning her neck in anticipation. Felix was delighted to be out of his parents' sight. He ran over happily to take her hand and kissed her deeply on the forehead.So it was true that people in love always felt like every day apart was an eternity.Green with jealousy, I turned away and entered the hall with my suitcase.The airport was enormous, and there were countless people heading to their respective destinations. That was their destiny. In the future, our lives would be like that, too. We would go in two separate directions.With tears in my eyes, I said a silent goodbye to him in my heart.I had more classes this semester compared to the previous one. I put all other thoughts behind me and threw myself wholeheartedly
We got on well because of how similar our interests were, and it was really easy to be around Colin.I'd followed Felix on Instagram again. Sometimes, when I managed to squeeze out some time, I would look at the Instagram stories he shared to try and build up my resolve.Felix was now entirely different from how cold and impassive he had been in the past. He posted about how happy his life was almost daily. If Felix and Lilac weren't having a drink together, they would be holding hands on a date. In any case, all these sickly-sweet images of their love life made me feel like I was choking on something.I thought that Colin treating me to pork ribs would make me feel better, but Colin's return kept getting delayed. I had no choice but to go and get pork ribs twice with my roommate instead.When summer break started, Felix didn't contact me, and I didn't disturb him. Once more, I picked up my suitcase and started the journey home.I felt like I had become accustomed to life withou