Killian's POV.I was flabbergasted. I couldn't move. My palms were sweating and my heart was racing. I couldn't say anything or even do anything. My heart was racing fast and my head felt light.Paula was pregnant.How the hell did this even happen?She was too cruel, she could've at least let me settle before telling me something like that, opening her mouth and spilling such from it.I had nothing to do and i felt kike I was trapped in a dark small room and everything was moving in the room other than me. They were moving against me but I was pinned to the ground, I couldn't move, I couldn't breathe, I could only stare and watch how the objects inside the room all penetrated me one by one.It was suffocating.I was suffocated. I didn't know how or when or why but my hand moved to my tie and loosened it.Okay, i knew why, i was too suffocated.I couldn't breathe and I felt like curling up in a corner and thinking about all the mistakes I've ever made.No matter how cruel this would s
Killian's POVI left Paula. I had left Paula.I ran away from the hospital even though Paula needed me. I left her because I needed to get to Esmeralda. I was a jerk. A bastard. An idiot. Stupid.There was nothing in the dictionary that I could find that would describe how insane and humane I was to Paula. I stood there speechless after she told me she was pregnant with my child but I couldn't say anything. I was such a coward.Paula needed me around, Paula needed me to say something, to tell her that I wasn't going to abandon her but I didn't say anything. I left her there to take care of herself, I left her there abandoning her and our unborn child.I was saying these words, scolding myself but I was still in my car, driving like a maniac to my house to see Susan, to get told to my face that Esmeralda was missing.I can't even weigh the importance of those two things. Paula announced to me a new child and Esmeralda was missing, probably in danger or something.No, the only reaso
Killian's POVI was worried. Beyond worrying.I couldn't figure out what was going on. Pauka had left standing there with the notion that Mikel was no different from Frederick.Would it be weird if I said that I didn't care?I didn't care if Mikel was leading them all to their deaths, I didn't care if Frederick came here and started a war. As long as it had nothing to do with me, as long nobody came to my doorstep, as long as they didn't come for Esmeralda and anyone else I cared about. I had no problem.I didn't care about the war, I didn't care whether Mikel was a good leader or not and I gave zero shits about Frederick.What I cared about was Esmeralda.I was only worried about her well-being. Mayne paula was right when she had said that if I cared about the city I should worry about Mikel becoming an alpha.Did I care about the city?Yes.However, not the way Paula wanted me to. I cared about the city, not to the point where I'd wield a sword or climb on a horse to defend it. Hu
Esmeralda's POVKillian did not say anything about helping me but I didn't need him to spell it out before I knew he would help with it.At first I had no.intention of allowing him find out about what happened, I thought i could do it myself, I could find out what was wrong with Izan and help him out on my own but from what i saw back at the house, with my mom, i knew i was helpless without Killian and I knew I would always be helpless without him when i broke down and cried, begging him to help me.I didn't want to always go to Killian for help but I had no.other choice, I had no other person in my life who would be willing to help me.I had no home.And I was holding on to the one I grew uo in. I was holding on to people who don't think twice before dropping me.Was that foolish, could that be regarded as me being extremely stupid or was that love?I didn't know, I only knew that I loved them with a pure heart, one that could go beyond everything else and do something for them.I lo
Esmeralda's POVI didn't know how I was feeling, but I knew there was an immense sadness within me. I was attacked by a great feeling of regret and woe. I felt guilty too. For the things I had done, for each day my lips claimed Killian's own. I felt guilty for the feelings I possessed for him.He was the father of the child and I, indeed I am a homewrecker. I was going to ruin the home of an unborn child. Though I had never even thought of the possibility of Killian having a child with her. I had caught them having sex but I never thought he would be so careless as to get her pregnant.I was stupid.In hindsight, I couldn't believe I had caught them having sex, yet I kissed him that night.I wanted to die.I was such a fool. Killian never loved me. Killian never saw me as something more than a plaything, a child he could use to while away time.I was disgusted at myself. I felt like a pile of shit, a carcass that should be buried in the dirt. I was not worthy to see the sun. I had
Esmeralda's POV.The drive was stuffy, the air was so thick I could hardly breathe. Killian was sitting so close to me all I had to do was stretch my hand out and I would touch him. However, if I made that decision to do so, I knew that I was really irredeemable and I was the spawn of the devil.I kept my hand away.My conscience was eating at me but I was more focused on the overwhelming smell he was emitting.He still smelled like apples. Delicious.Fuck!Fuck!!I still had lewd thoughts about him, allowing myself to be clouded with lust. Shameless. Though the AC jn the car was on, I still pressed the button that brought the car window down and kept away. The wind was in my hair and the smell of apples was far gone. I kept my face facing the window and I leaned into the seat in a relaxing position. If i didn't think about it, then I could get it out of my heart.Throughout the drive, he didn't say anything to me only when he asked if I was still leaving. He didn't even think to
Esmeralda's POVI ignored the vehicle and ran around it, though I had no idea what Killian wanted to talk to me about, I just didn't want to see him and if he had news about my family, it still wouldn't be pointless to find Donna.However, the car stopping in front of me delayed me and even though I tried to catch up to her, she was already far from the school's premises.I didn't know why she was avoiding me like a plague. Ever since I was thrown out of their house, this was the first time she was running away from me. It wasn't like she was just simply avoiding me, it was as if she was terrified and I know she wasn't terrified of me.I wasn't the problem but rather it was what was going on with Izan that made her like that. It was what was happening with him that she was thinking about.I didn't know what was going on and I prayed that Killian would be able to find out. He was behind me, I heard him climb down from the car but I didn't want to turn to face him just yet. I don't wan
Esmeralda's POV.I cleared my throat. I had nothing to say to what he had just said. The only thing in my head was that Killian was right, people would be able to smell my blood and they would find out that I was different. Not that I was only a wolf but that I was a pure blood wolf.He moved closer to me and I could tell he was taking a big whiff of my smell, he found it exciting. He liked it and it terrified me.He kept walking behind me, I was scared that he would suddenly just jump and attack me. It would be impossible though because we were in school and he would be risking a lot by doing such a thing.There was no way he would just attack me. There was no reason to even kill me. I was a pure blood wolf and I had no idea what that even meant but from the many warnings I've gotten from Killian, people could use it for their gain.Which reminds me, did he really think I would just follow whomever and allow them to use me for whatever?Did he see me as such a weakling that I would b