Insanity.

“What am I going to do?” Leia cried alone in the bathroom.

With her back against the wall, she gently slid down till she sat on the floor. 

“Ha~ I’m finished,” she laughed while she sniffled. 

With deep sighs, she folded her legs in, her head resting against the door as she closed her eyes. 

Leia began to ponder, “if I turn myself in, would he finally forgive me?” she asked herself, but she knew the answer to that question more than anyone else, to her, it was a definite, no.

The day of the celebration was just a night away, the air of trouble lingered and the tension accompanied by it had her choked with confusion.

If anything, her urge to watch him disappear only grew, and so did her fears.

There was no one to confide in, her in-laws reeked of wickedness and hatred for her, her husband was locked away and she was all alone.

Well almost.

As the night drew near, the skies became swamped with thick dark clouds that overshadowed the moon and chased away the stars, even the street lights were not enough to brighten up the place. Heavy wind swept through the city streets, as whatever was light got whisked away.

Rumbles and thunderclaps echoed, and soon it began to pour as if the world would be swept away by the flood. 

Every being hurried to take shelter, however, Leia stood outside a small house as she stared. 

Beaten by the rain, her arms were tightly wrapped around her shoulders and her attention was calmly focused on the window. It seemed she held back her desperate desire to go in. 

A silhouette seemed to pace to and fro the window, although the curtains were in the way, the light radiating from inside revealed that it was a woman who seemed to be busy.

Suddenly, the woman stopped and looked through the curtains, and then, as if struck with shock, ran away from the curtain.

Creak! 

The door to the house which Leia had been staring at, finally opened.

The golden light was emitting from it as the woman from earlier hurried outside with an umbrella.

“Leia, are you crazy? It’s cold,” Rachel yelled as she ran towards her. 

Leia grabbed onto Rachel’s arm as soon as she was within reach and then she cried, “I didn’t do it.” 

Being the first word Rachel heard from her, Rachel became troubled, but with the sky, raining cats and dogs, outside was no place fit for a conversation, especially on a rainy day.

“Whatever is wrong, we can talk about it inside okay,” she told her and quickly took her friend under her umbrella as she escorted her inside. 

Once the door closed, Rachael hurried to make a hot cup of tea for Leia who stood by the door, dripping wet as she shivered.

Her friend's behaviour troubled her as she found Leia hard to read, Rachel had never seen Leia in this sort of condition before, except, for the first time when they met.

She could remember it, that soulless expression on Leia's face when she first joined the team, how she stayed away from the others, Rachel knew that if she hadn’t stretched out a hand to her friend, Leia would still be in her old shell.

Silent, soulless and mysterious.

“Hey!” She yelled at Leia, “you should go sit by the fire or you’ll catch a cold, and I’m not ready to be responsible for the health of a billionaire's wife,” she laughed, her eyes never departing from Leia as she watched her curiously with a side glance, but Leia looked as lifeless as ever. 

“Leia,” Rachel yelled as she blocked the woman’s path with her hand before she could even go to the fireplace. 

The two women glanced at each other, Rachel could see in her friend's eyes that all was not going well.

“Tell me what’s wrong, you know I hate it when you go all blank,” Rachel said.

Leia stared at her friend, who eagerly waited to hear from her, and before she knew it, her eyes went blurry and she looked down. 

Her hands tightly clenched upon her dress as it broke down, her legs too weak to help her stand gave way as she fell into Rachel’s embrace, and at this moment, Rachel could tell that “something’s wrong.”

***

“Now, I want you to calm down and tell me what’s going on,” Rachel said as she helped her friend with some new clothes and a hot cup of tea.

Now that Leia had calmed down, it was time to start talking to Rachel even if Leia didn’t want to, as she looked away in guilt.

She reached out to Leia and held her hands in hers as she fondled her soft calm and spoke in a soothing voice. 

“I can’t help you if you don’t tell me what’s wrong you know,” she said. “Talk to me girl, I gotcha.”

Leia knew too well she couldn’t keep this to herself anymore. 

She felt suffocated by her dark past with each minute, and yet, as she looked at her friend, she wondered how the nicest lady would react if she knew how horrible she’s been. 

“I wronged someone,” she started. 

“I hurt that person most unforgivably, and now, my karma is out for me, and I can’t make peace with it,” Leia cried.

Rachel paused.

Her head slightly tilted as she tried to process her words, or at least understand her point. 

“Everything is all my fault,” Leia went on with her face slightly bowed, and yet, she didn’t shed a drop of a tear. 

“Leia, calm down please,” Rachel said as she shook her friend's shoulders, “Was it intentional?”

Leia’s body shook violently as if she convulsed, teeth clashed with widened eyes as she stared at her friend. 

She broke free from Rachel’s grasp and covered her ears as she squatted. She shook her head and her wet hair stuck to her face in a disoriented order. “No but…”

Rachel feared the worst as she watched her friend slowly lose her mind.

Worried, she calmly approached Leia, counting her steps with her hand stretched out, “then I don’t understand why you look like this, if it wasn’t intentional then believe me, they’ll understand.”

“It’s not that simple!” Leia yelled when she sprung up, her hand slapped off Rachel’s and then she took a few steps back.

Upon seeing that she had hurt her friend, Leia was both saddened at expression, and fearful of her past.

“I’m sorry…” she stared at her hand with shock, tears streaming down her eyes as she sobbed. 

“Damn you!” Rachel screamed.

Before Leia could ponder on the meaning of Rachel’s words, she found herself being forcefully gripped by her. 

“Then tell me what the problem is, I’ll try to think of something, I can’t read minds, dimwit.”

“No!” 

Leia screamed as she shut her eyes closed as if to disappear from the world. Her head constantly shook as she resisted. 

“Leia?!”

With her arms wrapped tightly around her shoulders, Leia began to mumble words to herself.

She took small steps and made her way to the sofa and sat down. 

“There must be a way around it, maybe if I talk to him…” 

“Him?!” Rachel interrupted as she went on her knees before her friend, “who’s he, Leia?”

Leia could only stare in regret at the words she blurted out. 

The cat was out of the box, and the ball was in her court, now, it was time for her to choose, if she would speak up, or remain quiet.