[--Kaiser Volkov--]The shower became my sanctuary, the water cascading down in a steady rhythm, warm and soothing as it enveloped me, washing away not only the grime of the day but a sliver of the turmoil tangled in my mind. I closed my eyes, letting the droplets hit my shoulders and trail down my body, feeling every sensation as though I could cleanse the thoughts clinging to my mind. For a moment, the world was muffled, softened by the steady rush of water, and I breathed in the steam-heavy air, feeling it settle something deep inside me, even if only temporarily.Esmarie. The name alone twisted something raw and aching in my chest. She knows. She knows about the fated mate bond, that thread that pulled me toward her, even if it wasn't one she felt herself—or at least, not enough to keep her bound. She bypassed it, sidestepping the weight and wonder of it all as though it were just another fleeting thing, not the kind of connection most of us would give anything to find. She mentio
[--Kaiser Volkov--]Dinner was nice. We ate quietly, I tasted the vodka right away. It was nice. It did make me crave a bottle, but the meal was delicious so I quickly let go of that thought. I wonder how long that’ll last before I fall back into my pattern of having a million vices. I stole glances at her while I ate. There were many things to take in. Her sleep-deprived eyes, her smile that seemed genuine. And how she could no longer meet my eyes.I should apologize for making her uncomfortable with my feelings, but I feel like bringing it up again would freak her out. How can I go back to living in denial when she knows the truth? With nothing to hide, I feel naked... well there are things to hide. Like her mother’s disappearance. I rubbed my forehead as I ate dinner.Once I finished, I thanked her and offered to do the dishes so she could go get some sleep. I expected her to take the chance, the open opportunity I was giving her to leave this awkward situation but it seemed Esmari
[--Esmarie Cruz--]There was a thumping sound against the door. No one was speaking, but I had a good idea that this wasn’t Kaiser. He wouldn’t knock. He’d say something. The door was built strongly. This is Kaiser’s home, he made sure it was safe. There’s no way for some regular wolf to break the door down.I don’t know why or even how I knew this. Then the noise stopped. It had lasted five minutes, but this was different. The silence was even more eerie, more .... I could smell it. I could smell the scent, it was stronger, deadly. Familiar. Then the noise began again. Like the person was now even more desperate to get through the door.Then the scream came. There was only one screaming, smacking, skin crushing against something. I couldn’t understand it. The person screaming... his voice was clear as day, but the violent sounds were just as loud. If his face was being hit then his voice would have cracked, or muffled.Eventually, I couldn’t take it anymore. I grabbed something I cou
[--Kaiser Volkov--]Elias, Berney, and Scotty arrived at my pack three days after the phone call and invasion. They were dealing with the attacks so they hadn’t been able to handle everything they’d set their minds to, so I had to wait while working on my own issues.Yes, I was avoiding Esmarie, sleeping in the office, showering there too, and speaking with doctor Jacob. I know avoiding her isn’t the right thing to do, but I’ve got alot on my head right now. Yesterday, I fell asleep on my office couch and I found myself waking up by the door. I caught myself mid-sentence where I was pounding on the door asking them to shut up.I don’t know who them is... and I’m glad the entire building was empty or I’d have thrown myself off the roof.Spiraling is an understatement at this time.The alphas sat on the other side of my desk, and they did not seem happy at all. Hell, I don’t feel happy. This is the first time I’ve allowed one of them to be here in my pack. I will never let it happen aga
[--Esmarie Cruz--]I didn’t see Kaiser for a few days, and then out of nowhere, he arrived. I was pissed. Yes pissed. The twins have gotten used to his pheromones, and I think he forgot they needed that to grow safely. Alphas are so damn hard to raise. My anger stayed with me throughout the nights when they stayed up and I worked hard to try and get them to rest. I haven’t had much more than thirty minutes nap here and there. I am exhausted, too exhausted to yell. This time I can definitely blame Kaiser. He said he’d help me out with them, and here he is flaking on me only to pop up when he feels it’s right. He spotted me in the living room on his way to the stairs.“You’re awake?”“Oh yeah, it’s hard to sleep with alpha twins who need an alpha’s pheromones to be at ease. My omega can only do so much. I wonder why we’re designed this way. Didn’t the gods think that some alphas aren’t reliable enough?”He cursed. “fuck, I forgot.”“Of course you did. Kaiser, it’s one thing to let me d
[--Kaiser Volkov--]There was something that changed in Esmarie the next morning. She wasn’t happy, she was sad but she was keeping it to herself. She was keeping her eyes on me, but there was something in them. Something that made me feel uncomfortable. Like I was a failure. Esmarie didn’t voice her problems though, she acted as though everything was fine.It took three days after I returned for me to snap. I told her I’d be home late, and she hadn’t responded. It’s been like that for these past few days. I can’t figure out what I did wrong, but I know it had something to do with my absence.I stopped by doctor jacob's office today. He might be able to open my eyes to something I didn’t see. I know I did something wrong to her, but she refused to call me out on it. Which made me feel like she was giving up. Or that she had realized something about it.It made me anxious, it made me feel like I had failed at something.Doctor Jacobs was happy to see me. Too happy if you asked me. My d
[--Esmarie Cruz--]I was lying on my back in my bedroom, the twins had started crawling all of a sudden, and I was shocked. My book on alphas said they grew faster than normal babies. Naturally, a werewolf child grows faster than an average human child. I always assumed alphas were the same but it turns out there’s a reason they’re called alphas.You’d think I would know that but no one teaches this stuff or perhaps it’s more a sign that I grew up in a really small pack with a shitty education system. A shitty everything to be honest. I was busy reading, while they excitedly crawled over my body when someone knocked on my bedroom door. I was slightly weirded out.Because I know Kaiser isn’t at home, and I’m not expecting him to come back anytime soon. My heart beat picks up speed, and I reached for the children right away. Pulling them towards my chest, and making myself take on a protective stance.“It’s me.” oh, I huff out a sigh of relief and release the twins. Placing them back on
[--Esmarie Cruz--] Kaiser gave me a genuine look. “I’m conflicted, that’s the truth. I don’t know what I want. I’m afraid to court you and form a relationship because I know the default setting in my brain is to run when things get dire. But at the same time, I want to be better. For myself, and for you. Because I’ll admit, while I tried very very hard each day to enjoy life... when I wasn’t high, drunk, or lost in a sex haze, my mind would always go back to that night what I could have done differently. It stunned me when I realized I wasn’t running from my parents, but from you instead. You were the past I was trying to keep at bay.“I hate that my family hurt you, and I hate that everything I do ends up hurting you more. So I don’t know, esmarie. If I’m given a chance to redeem myself, I can’t promise I won’t run away. But I’ve been seeing Doctor Jacobs, and I’m trying to be a better man. I don’t like i
[--Kaiser Volkov--]I'm not entirely sure when Esmarie and I rounded off our conversation and made our way back into the house, but we did. It felt like one of those surreal moments where the world fades into the background, and for once, everything just clicks. I couldn’t stop replaying her words in my head, letting them wash over me like a balm to wounds I didn’t even realize were still open. The thought of being allowed to have a relationship with her—being given that chance—made something in my chest tighten in a way I wasn’t used to.It was all part of my grand scheme to seduce her, and it worked out well.Tch. Part of me wanted to punch the air, another part wanted to groan because I could practically hear my wolf laughing at me. There wasn’t some master plan to seduce her. I hadn’t been sitting around with a blueprint labeled Operation Win Esmarie’s Heart—but here I was, somehow making progress despite myself. Despite the universe actively choosing to expose all of my darkest
[--Esmarie Cruz--]After the festivities of the evening, watching the vibrant fireworks and basking under the serene glow of the blue moon, Kaiser drove us back home. The ride was a quiet one, the kind of silence that feels natural after a long and eventful day. I felt a sense of peace, mixed with exhaustion and a tinge of happiness. The twins were snug in their car seats, their soft breaths barely audible but enough to remind me of their comforting presence. Kaiser seemed at ease as he drove, his usual stern features softened by what I could only describe as contentment.There wasn’t much to say between us, and the silence stretched comfortably. I found myself lost in the hum of the car’s engine, my thoughts wandering back to the festival. The glow of the moon, the music, the laughter of the crowd—all of it replayed in my mind like a pleasant daydream. Every now and then, I would glance at Kaiser, trying to decipher his thoughts, but his focus remained on the road, his expression unr
[--Esmarie Cruz--]I sat at Martha's booth, working alongside her and spending the majority of the day helping to feed people. It wasn’t something I had expected to enjoy, but as the hours went by, I found myself actually looking forward to it. The rhythm of chopping, stirring, and serving felt comforting in a way I hadn't anticipated. The people who stopped by were all so kind, and their smiles after tasting the food made it all the more rewarding. Each compliment was like a small victory, and by the time the afternoon began to fade, I was proud of what we had accomplished. The booth was buzzing with energy, the air filled with the mingling scents of freshly cooked dishes. But underneath the pleasant hum of conversation and laughter, there was an underlying current of nervous excitement in me. The twilight ceremony was only a few hours away.I was both nervous and excited. It was my first time experiencing the twilight ceremony. The anticipation, the magic of it all, stirred somethin
[--Esmarie Cruz--]The next morning, I woke up nestled in Kaiser’s arms. The sensation was disorienting—unfamiliar yet oddly comforting. My first instinct was to pull away, but a part of me hesitated, feeling a strange sense of safety I hadn’t expected. The light filtered through the curtains, bathing the room in soft hues, and I could feel his slow, steady breathing as he stirred awake beside me. His eyes fluttered open, meeting mine briefly before we both groaned in unison. It wasn’t irritation or frustration; it was more of an unspoken agreement to set aside whatever had happened the night before. Without exchanging a single word, we moved apart, a mutual understanding that today would start fresh as if yesterday’s events were a story meant to be rewritten.I slipped out of the blanket- not sure where it came from, the chill of the morning air hitting my skin, and began to stretch the stiffness from my body. Kaiser rolled onto his back, running a hand through his tousled hair, befo
[--Kaiser Volkov--]After Esmarie sobbed into my arms, her body trembling as if her emotions had drained every ounce of strength she had left, I let her stay there, holding her tightly. My shirt was damp from her tears, but I didn’t care. I didn’t want to let go, not yet. She needed this moment, and, truth be told, so did I. There’s something about seeing someone you care about break down in front of you that makes you want to fight the entire world to make it right.She said some words to me, but it didn’t really feel like we were speaking about it. She had been focused on me rather than what I had revealed. God, I consider my luck turning. If not, there’s no reason for her to be in my arms instead of across the street screaming bloody murder at me.Once her breathing evened out and her sobs softened, I hesitated before speaking. I knew what I had to say would only add to the storm swirling in her mind, but I couldn’t keep it from her. Not now. Not when I was trying so damn hard to p
[--Esmarie Cruz--]I dropped to my knees, the weight of everything hitting me all at once. My legs buckled beneath me as if they couldn't support the burden of the truth Kaiser had just revealed. I clutched at his arms, fingers trembling as they gripped the fabric of his shirt. My chest heaved with ragged breaths, and I fought to keep the overwhelming emotions from spilling out all at once."I'm sorry," he said, his voice barely above a whisper. The words cracked as they left his lips, soft and almost hesitant. He didn’t move to embrace me right away, though I could feel the tension in his arms. His restraint was deliberate, his way of giving me the space I might need to process this. It was so him, but not him at the same time. Sometimes careful careful, sometimes he thinks of me first. And yet, his quietness only made it harder. It made me feel annoyed at myself for not being more pissed off at him.What is this weakness of an emotion?I shook as waves of emotion rolled through me—a
[--Esmarie Cruz--]I didn’t think it was possible for things in my life to go from bad to worse. I honestly didn’t think that was possible.There are a million things I expected to hear from Kaiser in my lifetime, but none of them were the words that just came out of his mouth. My breath caught, and before I knew it, tears streamed down my face, silent but unrelenting. Throughout my years with the Darkwood family, I’d been told that my mother had abandoned me. That she’d disappeared because she wanted nothing to do with me. Barry made sure I believed that. He’d drilled it into my mind that she was cruel and only loved herself and money, that she’d walked away without looking back.While most of that was true, turns out that he’s not just a sadistic bastard but he’s a lying bitch who had always wanted to keep me trapped.Now, hearing the truth—that Kaiser was the one who killed her because they made him do it—it shattered me. Completely. My chest ached, and I could barely see through m
[--Kaiser Volkov--]I drove to Martha's house late in the night, almost midnight, exhaustion clinging to me like a second skin. My bones ached from the day's relentless grind, and my mind was teetering between shutting down and spiraling out of control. As I pulled into the driveway, I spotted the faint glow of the living room lights through the curtains. It didn’t surprise me to find Esmarie awake, sitting on the floor with her twins, who were transfixed by whatever cartoon Martha had queued up on the TV. Their big, drooling smiles and bubbling laughter were a stark contrast to how drained I felt. It was oddly comforting—just for a moment, anyway.Martha’s house always smelled the same: a blend of lavender air freshener and whatever was baking in her oven earlier that day. Which might have been nothing since she cooked at my house. Her place always smells like there’s a new meal in the oven waiting to be brought out.Tonight, it smelled faintly of cinnamon. I stood in the doorway, wat
[--Kaiser Volkov--]I met up with the assassin I’d hired after sending Esmarie home with Martha. The meeting was held in a secluded alley just outside the pack, the kind of place where shadows seemed to linger a little longer and the air always smelled faintly of damp concrete and regret. The man, tall and broad-shouldered, wore a plain black jacket and a hood that obscured most of his face. Not that it mattered—we didn’t need formalities, not in this line of work.When he approached, he didn’t say a word, and neither did I. We both understood the weight of unspoken agreements. He reached into his jacket and pulled out a thick envelope, holding it out with a steady hand. I nodded as I took it from him, a brief acknowledgment passing between us. No gratitude, no farewells. Just business. He turned on his heel and disappeared down the darkened alley, his steps quiet but deliberate.Wolves like him kill for cash—efficient, detached, and dangerous. He wasn’t the type to do favors, but our