Dario scrutinizes me for a few seconds before handing me over to Dante. I guess he’s pondering whether or not it’s appropriate for me to hold his son in my arms.
I understand.
He’s been alone these past few months.
It’s something that, as coldly as he expresses it, I know it must not have been easy to raise the baby alone and come to terms with the loss of his wife in the same way.
“Do you know how to hold babies?”
“No.” I can’t help but be honest. I’ve never held children after adulthood.
With my sister, me being three years older, I don’t remember if I ever carried her at all. But, nevertheless, I ha
In a matter of three seconds, I feel little Dante’s body being ripped from my arms. I hold on to a strong, muscular wall.It’s Dario or maybe his twin.My God, I can’t believe this is happening to me! Since when did Dario have a twin? This is something I hadn’t thought of before. It can’t be! This can’t be... Oh my God, it can’t be!Suddenly the memory of the night of pleasure with Dario comes to my mind. What if I didn’t really sleep that night at the lake with my husband but also with his twin? Oh no! No... no... this can’t be! This can’t happen to me.I feel my body slacken a little more, how the tingling in my hands increases, and my legs don’t cooperate to r
I stroll, still feeling the men’s stares behind me. I don’t let them intimidate me, I can’t do it, because to let their gaze hurt me, their presence pains me and their coldness wound me, is to admit that I’m alone in this house and I can’t do it, no matter how obvious it may be.I head for the door I saw when I got to the main floor, near the study, and walk there with intentions of looking for a juice or something I can feed Dante, who starts to wiggle in my arms. He must be uncomfortable, given that I am a stranger to him. As calm as I may inspire in him, in the end, I am a stranger, one who came to invade his family, his home, his very existence—a person who came to change his life forever. I don’t want to be one of those stepmothers who erase their mothers, who carried them in their wombs for nine months, from the lives of the children. I do
The sound of a door closing scares me out of my sleep and paralyzes my blood.“Who’s there?” I pull the sheet up to my neck, fearful.My vision is still blurry, perhaps from the fright of waking up in a strange bed and in a room that is not my own. Waking up in a different place for the first time in twenty-three years is a little scary.Moonlight streams through the glass window that is almost my size and illuminates the room a bit.A shadow moves beside the door.It is the intruder.“Who is it? Know that I will scream if you come any closer.” Even though I’m peeing my pants in fear, I try to push him away.
I wake up the next day with dark circles under my eyes, like shadows in the night: stalking and judging me. I am awake as if on the eve of a funeral. I see myself in front of the mirror. Early in the morning, Donatella brought up a suitcase with clothes my mother sent me. Just the right thing, since I brought nothing but my body and the commitment to be with Darío for the rest of my days on this earth.The reflection looking back at me seems even sadder than I feel.It is the true face I wear.Is it normal to feel caged, a prisoner of my own body and soul? What a fool I was last night to approach Darío! What was I thinking when I begged for a kiss from his lips?I shake my head, annoyed by my distress. I am not the one who will stay locked in
I don’t wait for Darío’s answer. Instead, I leave the room in a hurry. My footsteps sound on the tile. I don’t know where I’m going. I don’t care. I just want to get to my parents’ house. Before she does something stupid, I need to talk to Teresa, a major one, because just considering marrying Dawson is absurd and a terrible decision. And to think that I thought he was the one I spent the night with for a short time.“Tatiana! Wait!” Darío’s voice echoes throughout the place.I finish walking down the steps and turn for a second to look at him.“What? You’re not going to tell me that they’re free to marry whomever they want, are you? Because if that’s what it is, let me save you the breath. I’m not going t
“What could you solve?” asks Darío as he stands next to me in the garden.I hold the cell phone against my chest. It hurts my soul to know that my sister feels so lonely, heartbroken, and sad. It is true. I am not there with her. I don’t know what she is going through. I don’t know the loneliness she feels in her heart. She was abused by a person who was in my house for a long time. It was my partner, the man with whom I thought I would have my children. Besides, I thought we would live to old age together.Those wounds are the hardest to heal because you don’t see the abuse coming, you don’t notice the looks, you don’t determine what is in front of your eyes because it is a person you consider your friend, your brother, your partner, your father... someone you carry in your heart and fo
The bag is ready to go on the trip I’ve been planning for a few weeks. I take what I need: a couple of shirts, dress pants, matching shoes and belts. Donatella took care of getting everything ready. She knows I hate this kind of dressing up. It’s not for me. I see people wasting money, bragging about having all the possibilities to buy cars of the year, brand-name clothes, and expensive cell phones. Vanity fills the heart and mind. For me, those material things are totally fleeting. The fondness I feel for those details is a foam that, little by little, dissolves with time.I hand the suitcase to the driver, and he nods as he closes the trunk door.I don’t want to think about Tatiana. Thinking about her makes my soul ache. The confusion day after day has begun to overtake me, and it is more than I can handle. To admit
I hate hospitals.If I could say I hate anything in life, it’s actually going to a medical center with all the people looking at you like you’re hopeless. Maybe I feel that way. The truth is, I’m not ready to leave my son alone. Having brain surgery makes me consider every single option and everything that can go wrong with this. However, I must do it. My responsibility and duty as a parent are to look at every alternative, not to leave my child alone.Since Arianna passed away, I started having memory loss, first forgetting where I put the cell phone, then it increased, and I started to worry. I wondered if I fed the baby or if I ate in all day. Banalities and issues that were not important or noticeable. Donatella has always been there to take care of Dante. She never thought of leaving me. Even from the time I was