Chapter 6

I couldn't help but raise my brows as I watched Caesar and Rhea from a distance. They're talking and laughing for reasons I have no idea about.

"Are you seeing what I'm seeing? Is that really Caesar laughing with someone other than Braelyn?" one of my female classmates said to two of my male classmates.

They're standing beside me in the corridor, leaning on the railings, and, like me, they're staring at Caesar and Rhea, bemused, and I can see why.

It's unusual to see Caesar with someone who isn't me, but watching him laugh with someone who isn't is even rarer.

My classmates' disbelief was still visible as they glanced at me. "Who is that girl your best friend is with, Braelyn? Is that Caesar's girlfriend?"

When I heard the word girlfriend, my heart sank.

Rhea isn't Caesar's girlfriend yet, but she will be soon. No matter how much Caesar tells me he won't confess, I know they'll end up dating. Because if Caesar refused to admit it, Rhea would undoubtedly do so. And it's more evident than ever what will happen if the person you like declares their feelings for you. Of course, you'd be overjoyed and elated, and you'd eventually confess as well.

"Wait. That's Rhea, right?" my male classmate exclaimed.

My two other classmates quickly returned their penetrating gazes to Caesar and Rhea. They stared at them for a few minutes before shrieking. "Oh my God! That really is Rhea!"

"Holy shi—are we really seeing things correctly right now? Caesar—with our Ms. Perfect Rhea? How could that be possible?"

"What a lucky bastard to be able to talk, laugh, and be close to Rhea like that."

"This is damn-worthy news! We should tell our classmates about this!"

When I heard all my classmates say this, I rolled my eyes.

"Braelyn. Is Caesar dating Rhea?"

I wanted to scowl in response to my female classmate's question. But, as always, I held back and put on a sly grin instead. "I'm not sure. Maybe..." I sounded as if I were teasing and hinting at something, which led them to go wild and get even more intrigued by Caesar and Rhea's relationship.

Their questioning became more direct, but I merely grinned back, making them much more curious than they were before.

When Caesar came, I was still in chaos with my classmates. Because they couldn't get answers from me, they approached one of the people who had been the focus of their curiosity.

"What was that, Caesar? Why are you with Rhea?"

"Are you friends with her? How did you get to know her?"

"Are you courting her? Or are you already dating her?"

"How long have you been dating her then? Has it been weeks? Months?"

"No. It can't be months. This is the first time we've seen them together, so it can't be months. You guys must have just started dating recently, right?"

"Damn, Caesar! You're the man, dude! Who would have thought you were secretly dating the popular Ms. Perfect Rhea?"

"You better give us the details, man! Let us know every detail of how you were able to pursue Rhea when none of us boys here on our campus could do so. Even striking up a long conversation with her is hard, so how on earth were you able to talk to her and even laugh with her?"

Caesar cast a glance toward me. His brow was furrowed, and his eyes were seeking answers, but I simply shrugged before exiting the situation, leaving Caesar to face all of my classmates' scrutiny.

Caesar followed me inside the classroom not long after I entered with an inexplicable smile on his face.

"What did you tell them?" he asked as he sat in his seat.

"They asked me if you are dating Rhea, and I told them I don't know, maybe..."

"You could have just told them that we are not dating."

"How will I know if you guys are dating or not?"

"You know that we are not—"

"You've been hanging out with her for almost a week now, Caesar, despite you telling me that nothing more than friendship will be going on between you two. You come to school together, go home together, always go somewhere, and constantly text each other. Anyone with common sense would not believe it if you said you were merely friends. Especially when you have a crush on her."

Caesar looked down and remained silent, pondering what I had just said.

"Honestly, you're starting to frustrate me. You say things but do things differently. It's confusing. Now, if what you're doing is confusing for me, imagine how confusing it is for Rhea." I sighed. "Just make up your mind, Caesar. If you don't want to be with her, stop doing things that confuse her. But if you really like her, then face your feelings head-on and just fucking confess."

That way, my heart can finally let go of my feelings for you.

Caesar and I had been engulfed in stillness for a few minutes. We're both engrossed in our thoughts, completely oblivious to the bustle of our classmates.

"Can I go to your home later this evening?"

Caesar's question surprised me; I'm sure he could see it on my face.

His snicker astonished me even more.

Since he and Rhea became closer, having a chat like this with Caesar, much less seeing him grin, giggle, or even smirk, has become extremely rare to behold, as he now spends most of his free time with Rhea.

"Why do you look surprised?"

My heart hammered when I noticed Caesar's amusement. I had butterflies in my stomach, making me nervous.

I must also lecture myself for expressing things contrary to my feelings.

I cleared my throat and straightened my back, ignoring my heart's irregular heartbeat. "You won't be going home with Rhea today?"

"Nope. Rhea has some matters that she has to attend to. Besides, there's something I'd like to tell you."

I made a hum. "Okay."

—

"Will you be staying for dinner, Caesar? We'll have your favorite sinigang," my mother asked as Caesar and I prepared to enter my room.

Caesar gave my mother an earnest grin. "I will, Auntie!"

I shook my head. When he heard about his favorite cuisine, he became enthusiastic.

"We'll be in my room, Mama."

"Alright. I'll just call you two when it's dinner time."

Before entering my room, Caesar and I nodded in response to my mother.

I put my bag on the couch and walked straight to my closet.

"Can you put your bag properly?" Caesar said, which drew my attention to him, only to discover him putting my bag on the couch neatly and adequately before putting his own bag next to mine.

I grinned and shook my head once more.

He's always stayed the same. Always wants to keep things neat and tidy.

"I'll just go change my clothes," I said as I entered the bathroom.

When I exited the bathroom, I found Caesar lying on my bed, tapping his phone.

I sat on the bed's edge. "Are you texting Rhea?"

He replied curtly, "Yeah."

I didn't say anything else after that.

He is currently with me, yet he is still texting Rhea. And she's undoubtedly in his thoughts right now, even if I'm the one he's with.

I bit my lower lip as my heart ached.

If my heart were human, it would undoubtedly be diagnosed with a mood disorder—from hammering wildly due to happiness and giddiness to aching because of pain in an instant.

"Okay," Caesar finally sat up, placed his phone beside him, and looked at me, "I need you to lend me your ears."

I turned around and looked at him. "I already am."

Caesar sat silent for a moment before exhaling a long breath. "Rhea... She confessed to me."

My jaw hangs open, and my eyes widen as I feel like my world has stopped spinning because of what Caesar said.

My face is covered in shock and bewilderment.

I'm unsure how long I remained silent and stared in shock at Caesar, my mouth still wide. All I know is that my heart has resumed its erratic beating, but this time, it is due to nervousness rather than happiness, giddiness, or excitement. I couldn't move or even blink. I'm not even sure whether I'm still breathing.

I can't believe Rhea has already confessed. She only told me last week that she liked Caesar, and now she's finally admitted to him.

How can she be so brave and daring? How can she do what I've always wanted to do?

"Brae. Brae. Brae!"

Caesar's voice seeking my attention jolted me out of my deep thoughts and shock.

I finally looked Caesar in the eyes. I stared at him intently, seeking to see and understand his feelings, but I couldn't discover any. He was keeping it hidden.

I blinked many times before clearing my throat and swallowing my saliva. Then, I found my voice and was able to speak.

"And? What happened next? Did you... confess to her as well?"

Caesar averted his eyes from me before nodding.

I couldn't help but hold my breath. My heart feels like millions of needles have been poked through it, causing it to ache so badly that it feels like it's being broken into tiny pieces.

"Rhea told me she liked me two years ago but wasn't able to confess because she thought she wouldn't stand a chance, but through her friends urging her to confess before our graduation, she finally found the courage to get closer to me and confess. I told her I liked her too but couldn't be in a relationship with her yet because I wanted to focus on my studies. She told me it's alright and will wait for me until I'm finally ready to be romantically involved with her." He then laughed. "Doesn't it sound funny? Usually, it's the man asking and the girl being asked; it's usually the girl being waited on until she's ready to open her heart, but in our case, it's the other way around. It's Rhea who's willing to wait for me."

"Then... what's the status between you two now?" I questioned again, this time in a faint, almost whispered tone.

"I guess you could say we have a mutual understanding," Caesar said, a modest smile on his face. His suppressed emotions are gradually surfacing. Caesar finally looked at me and whispered the words I knew but had never heard from his lips before. "I like her, Brae. I like Rhea."

I wanted to laugh. I wanted to keep my true feelings hidden. I tried to conceal my pain, but it was difficult. I wanted to smile, act excited for him, and taunt him, but I couldn't bring myself to do so. Instead, I want to cry and rip my heart out of my chest to relieve the anguish.

It took me a long time to speak again, and I thanked all the Gods I knew because I could talk adequately without my voice shaking, even though my heart was still in such misery.

"If you like her, why can't you just be with her? Are your feelings for her not enough for you to date her?"

"I don't want to date her just because I like her. Being in a relationship goes beyond just liking each other, Brae. If I date her, I want to give her the time, care, and attention she deserves. I don't want to be with her and end up neglecting her because I also have my studies to consider. Because truth be told, my studies are much more important to me right now than being in a relationship."

"How long will you make her wait, then?"

Caesar averted his sight again, this time to the window in my room. "Honestly, I don't know. I told her that she doesn't have to wait for me, that I don't want her to waste her time on me, and that she should find someone willing to wait for her instead, but she told me that it's me she wants. She told me that as long as I am the one her heart is set on and as long as we still feel the same way, she will wait for me no matter how long it takes."

I tried to grin, but it didn't reach my eyes. "You like Rhea a lot, huh?"

Caesar looked me in the eyes once more and said, "Yes. I do."

I looked into his eyes again, but this time, unlike before, I could see his actual emotions. I can tell he's honest about whatever he says now. I can tell he's happy now, which makes me miserable and dissatisfied.

I was afraid of Caesar knowing how I genuinely felt about what was going on between him and Rhea, so I turned away again and gripped my bed mattress tightly.

I wanted something to say. I wanted to congratulate Caesar for finally facing his feelings and having them reciprocated by his crush. Still, I'm scared that if I open my mouth again, my voice will betray and shake because I already feel like crying. The ache in my heart has never gone away; instead, it has become more intense, as if all it wants to do now is cease beating.

"What's going on? Why are you being silent? Are you not going to criticize me? After all, I have been telling you that I wouldn't tell or confess to her, but I still did it. Come on, I am now permitting you to criticize me. I am giving you the right to do so. You can call me a liar and have no backbone." Caesar said it with a wide grin that nearly reached his ears.

He, indeed, is delighted.

I stayed silent. I had so many things I wanted to say. But the words that want to come out of my mouth that I know better than anybody should stay in my thoughts and heart.

"But I should thank you," Caesar continued, returning my attention. Our gazes locked again, the joy still visible, and his smile refused to leave his face. "Rhea told me that she asked for your help getting close to me so she could finally confess. She also already told me the truth about you, giving my phone number to her. So, thank you. Thank you for being our cupid. And thank you for letting me know what kind of happiness liking someone brings. You truly are an amazing best friend."

I kept my mouth shut, and Caesar wondered why I was acting so strangely. He began to suspect that something was wrong. But before he could ask, my mother knocked on my room's door, informing us that dinner was ready. And I seized the opportunity to conclude our chat and stop Caesar from interfering.

I'm not sure how I ate that night without choking from holding back my tears and sobbing. I also don't remember how I could send Caesar early when he wanted to stay because he hadn't finished chatting with me. All I remember is that the moment I returned to my room and lay on my bed, tears immediately began to run from my eyes, and I began to sob uncontrollably, finally allowing all of my genuine feelings to surface.