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Chapter 26
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2024-10-29 19:42:56I stepped from the bathroom in a great mood.
All I could think about was breakfast with the boy I’m falling so deeply for. However, since the universe hates me, I knew that wouldn't happen when I saw his face.
He was sitting in front of his laptop, staring in my direction with an expression I couldn't decipher. I immediately became alert and concerned.
The look on his face worried me. It was obvious that whatever he had on his laptop was serious. That’s saying a lot, considering that Fabian is barely serious.
Oddly, my body began to shake as I sat beside him. He shot me an unsure look, and I saw that it was actually a video. The cursor was positioned over the play button, and as much as I wante
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I’ve seen Fabian sad before. But this? This was far from sad.He seemed so torn apart. He wouldn’t even meet my gaze. He seems afraid to look at me, and that sort of hurts my feelings.Does he think that I will blame him for what happened? Yes, I felt a nudge of pain that he could’ve done something, but his mind was obviously not in the right place.If it was, then that girl would’ve been alive today. I could see it in his eyes. He actually wants to go back to that day to fix it. It pains me to see him like this. But it is what it is now. I just need to help him realize that.I held onto his cheek and guided his gaze to mine, but even then he let his eyes d
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My shoes left a muddy trail behind me as I marched down the hall, but I didn’t care.In all my seventeen years of living, I have never felt more determined to do something. And that’s saying a lot coming from me, considering I’m always determined to do something.But after what happened this morning with Fabian, and now knowing how we feel about each other I knew what needed to be done. And it was either now or never.My target came into view, and I kept my eyes trained on him as I moved. The sky was barely visible through the windows that were above his head. The cold showers outside reflected my mood towards my best friend completely.
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“Hey Paris. It’s Anastasia. There’s something I need to tell you. So, don’t be mad, I know we haven’t had our day out yet, but I have bad news.”She laughed a little after saying that, but I could hear the pain in her voice.“I’m moving back home to America. I know there couldn’t be a worse timing for this, but I came to England to get a fresh start. There was so much happening at home before I moved, but I found that running away probably wasn’t the most ideal thing to do.” She sighed deeply and silence followed for a while, that I almost thought that the message was over.But I was
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Nervous wasn't the word to describe how I felt.I was anxious. I was freaking out. But most of all, I was excited.It was finally the day of my date with Fabian. He didn't make it easy with figuring out what he had been planning, but I did soon enough.I figured it was a dinner date when he asked me what flavour champagne I preferred. He tried to make it seem like a harmless casual question, but after a whole week of being secretive, he should've known I would've figured it out. I wasn't really a fussy person, but I was happy with whatever he chose.
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The sun had already set, and the hint of the moon started to peek from behind the light feather of clouds. I noticed that we were driving away from the city, yet we were somehow still in the middle of it all. My restaurant theory started to wither when I saw him pull onto a paved walkway that seemed deserted, though I didn't understand why. It seemed like an abandoned park, although it was beautiful. I let go of his hand so that he could park adequately, and I didn't even notice when he hopped from the car and appeared at my door because I was too busy trying to figure out what was happening. "Fabian? Where are we?" I questioned, looking around as I tried to recognize something—anything. I've lived in England all my life, and I believed that I knew every inch of the city. But, apparently, I didn't. "I'll show you," he simply stated as he held me by my waist and lifted me from the car. I giggled as his fingers tickled me. Still, I was focused o
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I walked through the school doors with a beaming smile on my face. The weather seemed to have gotten my memo this morning, seeing that it was absolutely beautiful out. I was excited to see Shanae. I had been dying to tell someone about my date on Saturday. It felt good to say that I have a boyfriend now. Images about how our night ended also had my nerves tingling again. I had never given much thought to how my first time would be, but it was absolutely perfect. Shanae spoke about hers as if it was wild and crazy, and maybe it was. But mine? It was gentle and filled with so much love. It was utterly perfect. However, I wasn't sure if I was ready to tell anyone about that part of the night just yet. Not even Shanae. I simply wanted to share the moment with Fabian alone for now before turning to other people. Besides, if Colton should find out, I had no idea how he would react. He obviously thinks Fabian is using me. He would only believe that Fabian 'g
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The end of the day came sooner than I anticipated, and oddly after Guidance class, I was in a completely better mood. I didn't talk to Colton, but I felt lighter—as if I could breathe again whenever my mind went to him. I was sceptical about whether I should tell Fabian or not. I don't think he would oppose us being friends again, but I know he wouldn't necessarily be comfortable with it either. To be fair, any boy wouldn't be okay with their girlfriend being friends with someone who 'has feelings' for her. Yet, I knew he wouldn't try to tell me not to be friends with him, simply for my sake. I don't think Colton and I could ever go back to how we were, but the thought of seeing him and talking to him again instead of walking past him as if we were strangers didn't sound too bad. Speaking of both boys, I had to tell Shanae everything at lunch, so I barely got any time to actually eat. Every time I picked up my sandwich, another question was thrown in my face.
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For a while, I was frozen in my spot. My dad was… hugging me? His shoulder shook once, and I slowly raised my arms to wrap around his back as sudden remorse swamped my nerves.This wasn’t only hard for Cynthia and me. It must’ve been hell for him too. To call a woman who was in love with another man your wife for two years, sharing a bed that had no comfort and still had to be strong for his kids, couldn’t have been easy.Of course, there were a zillion things they both could’ve done differently, but just like Fabian and that girl who died, some things just happen to slip away right before your eyes.We are mere humans, after all.“I’m so sorry, Paris,” he sobbed as he slid down to his knees before me, keeping his head buried in my stomach. My tears fell involuntarily as I watched the strongest man I know break in front of me. “I failed you. I failed my daughters.”Cynthia ran towards us
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I stood outside my house in a nervous mess. I tried to move forward, but my feet wouldn’t go.It was almost one in the afternoon by the time Fabian dropped me off, and I looked back for the umpteenth time to ensure that he was still there. Just like every time I checked, he was sitting in the car under the neighbour’s tree, staring at me. “You can do this, Paris,” I mumbled, trying to give myself a push. Still, I felt stuck. With a deep breath, I grabbed my phone and dialled Cynthia’s number. She picked up on the third ring. “Paris? Where are you?” she asked, sounding distressed. I sighed. “I’m outside. Can you—um—can you meet me by the porch?” “Sure. I’m on my way.” On a typical day, she would’ve made fun of me for being a baby. But she, more than anyone, understood the intensity of the situation and our feelings. As she appeared in front of me, I felt my guilt resurface full folds. Her eyes were red and puffy, and the
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Colton.My eyes darted between the two boys. They didn't appear as sudden best friends—far from it, actually. But they both looked at me with a similar light in their eyes. They cared for me, and I assumed that was the only reason they were in the same place again.My eyes lingered on Fabian for a while, silently asking him if he did this. As far as I knew, Colton didn't have this address. However, all he did was shoot me a wink before leaving the room.My gaze settled on Colton as he reluctantly crossed the room, and I straightened my back as I rested the remainder of food on the nightstand."H-hi," he said with a short wave. I cleared my throat as I returned the gesture."When you said you wanted to hang out today, this isn't what I thought you meant," I said, attempting to initiate conversation. The last time we spoke was in Guidance class, and it wasn't even a straightforward conversation.Why did Fabian bring him here? I wasn't up
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Fabian's POV I couldn’t believe my eyes. I figured I was seeing things, but one glance at Paris, and I knew I wasn’t. My heart instantly shattered as I watched her stare at her mother in disbelief. Behind her beautiful eyes, the turmoil was evident. I hated it. I hated watching her heartbreak before my eyes, yet I didn’t know what to do or say to her. She was so happy today. Though she had a bad week, I was glad that her weekend started off well, seeing that she really enjoyed visiting Dad. If only we were a little bit later or earlier, then she’d go to bed happy and send me one of those adorable pictures from under her covers, with her purple bonnet over her head and her retainer against her teeth. But one simple thing at the wrong time ruined her night, and by the looks of it, it would leave a permanent stain on her view of life. I’ve had my fair share of family drama. I know what it’s like to wake up one day, and your entire world crumbles
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After thanking me and patting Fabian on his shoulder with a proud gaze, Jim led us inside. I don’t know what I was expecting, but I was blown away by the interior. It was simple and homely, yet was so modern and beautiful. I got cosy in his surprisingly excessive couch as he rested the lily on a windowpane. Fabian sat beside me and immediately wrapped his arms around my shoulder as his dad fetched us sodas. I relaxed in his arms as his dad returned and handed us the drinks. “Thank you,” I smiled, and Fabian rested his on the coffee table. “So,” Jim said as he relaxed in the chair across from us. “My boy has a girlfriend. I thought it would’ve never happened.” I spitted a little of my soda on my lap as I tried to suppress a laugh. Fabian? Never getting a girlfriend. It seemed so unlikely to me. “I’m sorry,” I giggled. “It’s just hard to imagine Fabian without a girlfriend.” Seeming offended and amused at the same time, Fabian na
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If I could choose between a car ride or motorcycles with Fabian, I’d definitely choose cars. Why? Because being in a closed space when he drives makes him a different person. On his bike, he had a certain mischievous aura, but in a car, he’s definitely a sweet boyfriend type.For the past hour, we’ve been playing corny car games to pass the time. Eventually, they evolved into our own version of games, and it was hilarious.“Okay, okay. I have another one,” I cheered as our laughter died down. “What’s the most confusing way a girl could break up with someone?”“I don’t know, but I sure do hope it doesn’t happen to me,” Fabian said with a chuckle. I got excited to share my lame joke, so I spun in my seat as far as the seat belt would let me so I could see him better.“Leaving a note on your old car she borrowed saying, ‘this isn’t working.’”Out of m
