Maybe I Need Therapy

Back at the apartment, Sam and I had dinner, and then I went to my room to shower and get ready for bed. It was only eight, but I’ve been enjoying my routine of watching a movie before bed. So, I crawled into my big fluffy comforter, flipped the TV on, and browsed the movie selection.

 Gojo stared at me with those big, crisscrossed eyes of his through his bowl.

“Hungry?” I asked leaning over to grab his jar of floating fish food. He kept swimming at the side of the bowl until I dropped a pinch into his tank. I watched as he swallowed them whole. Within seconds he was back at the side of the glass begging for more.

“Gojo, you eat too much.” I plopped three more pellets into his bowl. Unfazed by my comment, Gojo kept nipping away at the floating sticks at the surface of his tank. After finishing these last three off, he returned to the tank’s side again. I put my finger against the glass in front of him and moved my finger across the surface. Gojo followed my finger around in a complete circle before giving up and swimming off in the opposite direction. I turned my attention back towards the TV and settled in for a horror movie. Of course, because right now, that’s just what I need. Well, what I needed was to stop seeing this mystery boy pop up everywhere I go. It was a little frustrating. I paused the movie and decided to call Callie. I searched for my phone in my purse but couldn’t find it. Then I heard Callie’s ringtone from my pants in the clothes hamper. She always did have a knack for knowing when to call.

“Hey Cal,” I answered, throwing my jeans back into the hamper.

“Jay! O-M-G I am so sorry! I don’t know how I forgot what today was!” Cal’s words all came out in a rush, “I looked at the calendar to see when would be a good day to go shopping for homecoming dresses, and then it just hit me. I’m such a spaz! Jay, can you forgive me? Do you want me to come over? I can be there in seconds with Oreo ice cream and the biggest bag of Cheetos I can find!”

“It’s okay Cal,” I laughed. “I went to visit them with Sam.”

“Sam is so nice,” Cal replied. “If he was, like, twenty years younger I’d be all over that!”

“Oh goodness Cal, chill out.” I choked, “He’s like my second Dad!”

“Yeah… a HOT second dad!” Cal giggled back, “So are you sure you didn’t want that ice cream and Cheetos?”

“Well, let me go ask Sam. Hold on, I’ll be right back.” I put the phone down to my chest and ran to the living room, where Sam was watching his nightly viewing of criminal shows.

“Hey, can Cal come over for like, an hour?” I asked leaning over the couch next to him.

“Sure, you just need to be in bed at ten.” He said, not turning from the TV.

“Okay Cal you can-“ I started.

“I’m at your door, come open it.” She finished, hanging up her line. I shook my head and went to the door.

“Jay!” Callie threw her arms around my neck with a bag of Cheetos in one hand and Oreo ice cream in the other. “We are going to need spoons.”

“Hey Callie, that was fast,” Sam replied, glancing at her for a brief moment before getting sucked back into his show.

“What if he had said no?” I laughed making way for her entrance.

“Sam likes me. He wouldn’t deny me to come over, right Sam?” Sam gave a thumbs-up motion but didn’t take his eyes off the TV.

“So spoons?” Callie released me and went to the kitchen and retrieved silverware then ran down the hall to my bedroom. I followed her and shut the door behind me.

“Hey, you think Gojo likes Cheetos?” Callie asked dangling one above the water.

“I don’t know,” I laughed taking it from her and shoving it in my mouth, “but I don’t want to find out.”

“So what are we watching?” She looked at the TV, “Horror? Really?”

“It’s just what I flipped to,” I shrugged.

“What happened to miss romantic. Miss comedy? When was the last time you went on a date?” Callie turned the movie off and flipped to something more romantic. “Let’s watch a rom-com.” I thought back to when the last time I actually went on a date was. It had been more than a year ago. I sighed and sat down on the bed next to her.

“What? We can watch something else if you want, Jay.” She patted me on the leg.

“Well, there is something I wanted to ask you about,” I replied. She paused the movie and turned her body to give me her full attention and moved the Cheetos between both of us. She stuffed some Cheetos in her mouth and gave me the thumbs up to let me know she was ready.

“Okay well, I have been seeing this boy,” I started. I knew that came out wrong when she started choking.

 “Not that kind of seeing, it’s like he is just kind of everywhere I go and I haven’t seen him before today.”

“You finally crushed on someone?” Cal shrieked, popping open the ice cream lid, “I must say, Jay, it’s about freakin’ time.”

“No, Cal! I literally have never seen him before, not at school, not around town, not anywhere. And now I’ve seen him at practice and the cemetery... And this may sound paranoid, but I think he’s watching me.”

“Maybe he is a transfer student and you caught his eye at school,” she suggested. “How about tomorrow you can point this guy out to me and I will find out all I know about him? I’ll ask around about a new student.”

            I nodded. “Maybe you are right. Maybe I’m just over-thinking things.”

“And maybe this guy is following you because he is hardcore crushing on you too,” Cal giggled. “He’s at least cute I hope?”

“He is,” I admitted. “He’s that tall, dark, and handsome type. He looks like our age if I had to guess I would say he is a senior.”

“Tall, dark, and handsome,” Cal jeered. “I like him already. Was he buff?”

“I don’t know.” I thought back to when I saw him in the stands. “He had a loose shirt on, but my guess would be yes.”

“We have to find this mystery hotty of yours,” Callie shrieked, and I could tell she was already making her list of go-to gossip people in her head. “I’ll find him and all we need to know before school lets out tomorrow, okay?”

I reached for the Cheetos and popped one into my mouth just as Cal’s phone rang.

“Hello?” she answered, “Hey, Mom. Right now? I’m with Jamie. Just a few more minutes? You’re being unfair. Fine!” she flipped her phone off and jammed her feet back into her shoes. “My mom is mad at me for not telling her I left the house earlier so she wants me home now. You can keep the ice cream and Cheetos. I wouldn’t recommend you eat it all tonight, though.”

I laughed and threw her coat at her. She caught it and we went through the door. Sam was digging around in the fridge when we passed.

“Bye, Sam,” Cal said as she opened the front door.

“Leaving early isn’t like you,” Sam replied, popping the top off the beer he finally found.

“Yeah, it’s mom’s orders.” She waved, then we hugged, and she ran to her car. I shut the door when I heard her engine turn on and sat on the couch next to Sam.

“How are you feeling, Blue Jay?” Sam put an arm around me and hugged me lightly.

“Better than earlier,” I replied. “What’s on now?”

“Another criminal show.” He took another drink.

“I should have known,” I shook my head at him. “You don’t have an early day tomorrow?”

“It’s my day off. I can come to get you after school if you don’t want to hang out there till the game starts.” Sam offered.

“I forgot tomorrow is Friday.” I thought for a second, my options were to sit in a gym for five hours or go hang out with Sam until the game started. Figuring I could stand the latter a bit more, I finally said, “I may take you up on that. It depends if Cal wants to practice some or not.”

“Okay, I’ll just be sitting around until the game so just let me know.” Sam turned his attention back to the TV screen, so I went back to my room.

Lying on my bed, I stared at my phone for a while watching the time tick to nine forty-five then clicked it off. I guessed Callie was hearing a mouth full of her mom and that’s why she hadn’t texted yet. I rolled over to my nightstand, flipped the lamp on, and plugged my phone in. Then I went and turned off the light to my room, something caught my eye. I walked over to the window and looked out across the park. On a bright day, I could see it all from where I stood from the window in my room. But now it was dark, so my vision was limited. There was a light flickering on a post next to an old wooden bench. I squinted my eyes a little more and saw someone sitting on the bench. Someone who was wearing the exact outfit as the boy I’d seen earlier at school and the cemetery. Someone who keeps popping up everywhere I go. Someone who was looking straight into my window! I pulled the blinds shut so hard Sam was calling to see if I was okay. When I didn’t answer he came in to check on me and turned the lights on.

“Is everything okay?” he asked, walking over to me as I stared dumbly at the window.

“Yeah, I just thought I saw… something.” I blinked a couple of times thinking about whether I should tell Sam about this strange boy. He gets so defensive as it is. What if I was just imagining things? So, this new boy came to my school. Then he’s in the cemetery… maybe he’s visiting family too? Then he’s at my apartment… maybe he lives here too? Maybe I’m growing more and more paranoid as the days go by. Callie’s right, I need to stop watching scary movies every night.

Sam pulled the curtains back enough for us both to look out, no one was there. The flickering of the light ceased and was now completely lit. The bench was completely unoccupied. My eyes scanned beyond my window. He was there, wasn’t he? Maybe I need therapy.

“Well, there isn’t anything out there now,” he said half to himself half to me, “Why don’t you try and get some sleep? You can leave your door open if you want to. I’ll be up for a while.” I nodded as he turned and went for the door.

“Sam?” I said, my voice cracked at the end of his name. He stopped and turned back to me before I continued. “Do you think I’m crazy?”

            “I think you have had a rough year, Jamie. You lost your parents and your brother. Today is the anniversary of that day where your whole life was changed.” He walked over to me and put a hand on my shoulder. “You are not crazy. If anything, you are probably managing things a lot better than I would if I were in your shoes.” I nodded and got into bed. Sam walked back to the door. I rolled over before he turned off the light.

“Night, Blue Jay,” Sam said retreating down the hall. I nuzzled into my pillow and tried to go to sleep. I felt myself slipping in that direction when my phone went off and woke me back up. Grabbing blindly at it, it fell to the floor. I groaned and bent to pick it up, almost falling out of bed in the process. It was a text from Callie. It read, “Hey, mom’s done with her raid. Sorry about earlier, I’ll see ya tomorrow. Night.” I put my phone back on the nightstand and turned in the opposite direction. This time, I fell asleep instantly.