002: Painful resolve

Elena

I remained in the same sitting position, my thoughts jumbled up. My tears had already dried up, but I was still staring listlessly at the divorce agreement. I didn’t even remember how long I’d been in this same spot.

“Ronan, when I grow up, would you really marry me?” I was young and naive and allowed the words of the adults to influence me.

“Yes. Let’s get married when you grow up.” Ronan replied cheerfully. His face was warm and innocent. He had the brightest of smiles that were only reserved for me. When the sun shone on his white shirt, my young heart wavered, and I knew he was the one for me. I was so little, yet my heart settled on him and never wavered after that.

Why didn’t I wake up from that childhood fantasy when he started dating Darcy? Why didn’t I wake up when his father had to force him to marry me three years ago?

It’s because I love him and only want to spend the rest of my life with him. But why can’t Ronan just love me back? Haven’t I been a dutiful wife to my husband?

As I walked toward the dressing table, I couldn’t stop asking myself when everything changed. I grabbed the divorce agreement Ronan dropped and began to read through the document.

“For Mr Ronan Simpson to gain his freedom from Ms Elena Jones, Ms Jones will be paid an alimony of 50 million dollars. The divorce is to take effect one week after the agreement has been signed…”

I thought we had a beautiful home. Ronan was rarely around, but he still treated me well. We never quarrelled in the past three years, so why does he feel trapped?

So, my husband has always seen this marriage as a bondage, huh? “Elena Jones! You did this to yourself. He never said he loved you, but your memories of the young man held you captive.”

I didn’t see any reason I should keep reading this document. It would only make me sadder. I love Ronan, and he belongs with me. How could I live with myself if I allowed him to end up in the arms of a vixen like Darcy?

It seemed like I was convincing myself as to why we shouldn’t divorce, but I don’t care anymore. I’m allowed to be a little selfish. I earned that much for being a dutiful wife in these three years. I am not signing this, and I am not getting a divorce from Ronan. Whatever the problem was, we could always sort them out.

When I finally looked into the full-length mirror, all I could see was my tear-stained face, eye bags under my swollen eyes, and my skinny form that made me look malnourished.

“How pitiful!” Everything about me screamed nothing but sadness. Could Ronan be requesting a divorce because I don’t look attractive anymore?

When I picked up my phone and finally checked the time, I realized it was already dawn—yet I still couldn’t sleep. My mind wasn’t in the best frame to allow me to have a shuteye.

I could only scroll through my phone to kill the boredom while wondering what Ronan was doing at this time. Was he with...

#CEO Simpson spotted with his first love, sparking speculations of unfinished business.#

#Ronan Simpson buys top-tier jewellery for designer Darcy, sparking rumours of rekindled love#

I thought I could forget the haunting memories from last night, but seeing these captions made them flood into my memory like a tsunami. I guess I couldn’t just pretend by shutting off my mind.

At the final jewellery handover ceremony, reporters threw various questions at Ronan and Darcy.

“Mr Simpson, may I ask if this charity jewelry gala hosted by your group is to welcome Miss Darcy back?”

“This Vintage necklace you auctioned off symbolizes faithfulness till death do us part. Is this also your intention for Miss Darcy?”

“Mr Simpson, please say something.”

“Miss Darcy, everyone knows you were once in a relationship with Mr Simpson. Will your relationship take a new turn with your return?”

Ronan was speechless, while Darcy kept her elegant smile and swept her gaze calmly over the group of reporters. I could still remember how poised she was, staring at everyone as if their worship and admiration belonged nowhere else but with her. Compared to her, I don’t even know how to describe my pathetic self.

It’s not like the questions stopped because they refused to respond, though.

“Ms. Darcy, it’s been a long time. Do you have anything you would like to say to your fans?” One reporter pushed, using a different approach.

“This time around, I’ll take back everything I’ve missed out including my career and all those I’ve lost—most importantly, Ronan.”

Darcy was clearly declaring war on me, yet my lovely husband just couldn’t take his eyes off her. There was a fire in Ronan’s gaze that I had never seen before. I guess Ronan reserved this fire only for Darcy.

The realization caused a knot to tighten in my heart, hardening my resolve to remain married to Ronan.

[Ding!]

The sound of a text message and an accompanying picture came through.

“Maybe my eyes are fuzzy because of my tears." I hastily rubbed my eyes and picked up my phone once again. It fell from my hands earlier.

It’s still there. I saw the image still plastered on my phone screen, making my blood boil. My husband couldn’t wait to embrace his first love.

Ronan was lying naked on the bed. He was in a sleeping position with none other than an equally naked Darcy. Her message was simple…

“Ronan slept with me last night.”

What the heck! “What did I ever do to wrong you, Ronan Simpson? Why would you take your first love to our matrimonial home?” He even allowed her to show me that scene.

I could never mistake that place for anywhere else. I designed every inch of that house, paying extra attention to the bedroom. That was my bridal room. It was the same place Ronan and I consummated our marriage.

It has always been my childhood dream to have this kind of bedroom when I got married. Ronan knew this. Hence, he allowed me to design the place from scratch. Every single detail in that room was my sweat and blood.

Even the portrait on the wall of me smiling so brightly held a deep meaning for me. He knew all this, yet he slept with his first love in our wedding room.

“I’ve adored you for fourteen years and spent the last three years in this marriage blaming myself for everything that went wrong. If only I was forthcoming enough, another woman wouldn’t have confessed her feelings for you first. If only I had given you a child, you would have smiled at me. If only I were the love of your life, you would still have reserved that smile for me. If only…

My whole life has been such a joke.

I haven’t even signed the divorce agreement yet, but my husband was already getting cozy with another woman. No. Ronan didn’t only sleep with another woman but brought his first love back to show me my place.

“How could you, Ronan Simpson? How could you break me like this?” This humiliation is too much for me to bear. I can’t take it anymore. I can’t take this from anyone—not even from you, Ronan.

I would fight for everything that’s mine. Darcy would not snatch you from me. Not this time, Ronan. No matter what, I will remain your wife. “After all, I saw you first.”

I wanted to forget the taunting picture that Darcy sent, but I couldn’t. The image was pasted at the back of my mind, and it continued to haunt me, no matter how desperately I wanted it to stop.

My head hurt badly, and I quickly switched off the phone, yet it only got worse. When my abdomen began to ache also, I squatted on the floor, hoping and praying the pain would quickly go away.

No matter how I screamed, pain assaulted me from different parts of my body. My head felt like it would split into two, until darkness finally consumed me…