13

..."There was you, you looked so normal despite loosing your siblings, your mom, you actually looked perfect, and somehow staring at you everyday gives me this... calmness inside, this peace, you were my peace. You made those trauma's go away. The little efforts you put, I saw them, I saw them all but I was a coward to man up and told you that I loved you too because somehow your naivety made me freeze, everytime I saw you my heart would skip a beat and, and the way you would look at me, it would be like you were seeing right through me and I would get scared, so so scared I'll have to look for a defense to cover it up by pushing you away. Now I think about it, that was so wrong, so so wrong.

I never saw you as flawed in any way because you knew you had your flaws and you brought them out and you embraced them, all of them, something I could never, that was one bold move Blu, something my coward ass could never do.

And that day, at prom, I had an anxiety attack earlier because I saw