Chapter 20

Excellent," Alex replies, standing taller than me in his human shape. He was tall, but he's grown even taller since then. He kneels next to me and transforms into a wolf in an instant. His brown skin turns to blonde fur, and his piercing green eyes don't go away when his beast fully emerges.

He is really tall compared to me. I damn myself for not being taller.

He lets his mouth drop. He says, "Right," in a wolf-like, gravelly voice. "So, I know I said I'm all for the basics, but I think you'll learn a little faster if I throw you into the deep end."

My wolf-like features twitch into a frown. "What do you mean?" 

"I mean... this."

He jumps on me with the speed of light and throws his weight against me. I let out a startled gasp as his weight pushes me into the floor.

"What the hell!" I exclaim, feeling heat shoot up my sharp cheekbones. Even fluster, it seems, won't let me go from my wolf form.

Alex gives me a wolf-like smile. He presses down on my shoulders for emphasis. "I don't have a lot of time to teach you, Nomi. Prince wants you to be a 'fine warrior' -- whatever that means --asap, so we can't waste any time on the baby stuff." "I want you to find a way to escape my hold."

He's just called me Nomi, but I'm too freaked out to care. I say, "This is so dumb," instead.

"Yet efficient," he adds. He smiles again, and even with his wolfish features, the smile is heart-melting in that weird way. "It's more likely you'll be wrestling another wolf rather than having a friendly sparring match with them." "Come on. Throw me off."

I wince, but give in. The suggestive image of him holding me down like this in human form jolts into my thoughts, causing my stomach to turn. I give a headshake. No, I must get rid of him. Right now.

I initially attempt to lift my arms, but he has my shoulders firmly clamped down on me. I start to writhe and flail, attempting to break free from his clutches, but he refuses to let go.

He smiles once again. "You're going to have to do better than that."

I give him a fierce look. I keep thrashing and bucking, but no matter what I do, he manages to find the perfect spot to apply pressure and maintain a solid hold on me. We continue in this manner for a few minutes, and soon I find myself struggling to breathe.

Alex chuckles as I mutter, "Fucking hell..." For him, this comes naturally. "Remember, Naomi, that you're smaller and maybe a little weaker than me.

obligated to apply your judgment."

I hold back. He's accurate. Besides, there's only so much energy I can give until my heart gives out.

His left foot is positioned somewhat off-center when I turn to face his left side. I hook my right foot around his and throw it off-balance, swinging out my left. That's all I need when he gives way and releases my hand. I thrust my paw into his face, forcing him backwards long enough for me to go underneath him. He stumbles and falls to the ground while trying to stop me. 

I jump on top of him and hold him down in the same way that he had held me, snapping with victory. I'm sure he could fool me if he wanted to, but it doesn't really matter because I met his challenge.

Alex smiles once more. "Not bad. Though best believe next time I won't go so easy."

"You weren't 'going easy', you were just careless. Anyone with a pair of eyes and a working brain could see your left leg was out of alignment," a quiet voice speaks from behind.

Both of us tense up. Glancing up slowly, I see Prince Kohl standing a short distance behind us, appearing unimpressed. His amber eyes drift to Alex, who bears a striking resemblance to a deer struck by headlights. "I thought I told you to teach her the basics?"

With great care, Alex removes me from him and stands, appearing menacing to everyone but Kohl. "You said you wanted a fine warrior, your highness. I feel Nomi needs to be fast tracked in order to get there."

Even though Prince Kohl raises an eyebrow at the odd moniker, he still waves him off. "Whatever, go back to your Rotation. I'm taking over from here."

Alex gives me what can only be described as a werewolf shrug in return, then winks and trots past Kohl in the direction of the palace.

Over his shoulder, he cries out, "See ya later, Nomi!"

Kohl complains, "Go back to your goddamned post, Goldie," and then he turns to face me. After Alex has left my line of sight, I give the prince a fierce look.

"It was impolite," I say.

Kohl shrugs, moving his heavy black cloak in tandem with his movements. His clothes are very appropriate for someone who is about to provide training. I wonder whether he really intended to train me today. "I'm the prince, I can do what I want, Nomi."

I would have folded my arms if I were human. Rather, I prickle. "Shut up."

Kohl shrugs once more. Then, after a few silent moments, gestures toward the woods' thicket. "Shift back to your human form and go in there. We're going to be in the forest today."

I watch as he gives me a shirt and some pants that I had no idea he was carrying. I seize them and make my way into the forest. He pauses in a clearing not far behind us and gestures to a big tree to our left. I move behind it and transform back into a human, discarding the clothing from my nude body. Luckily, Kohl is unable to see me.

When I'm finished, I go back into the clearing and around the tree. When I left him, Kohl was still standing there.

"Today, I'm going to teach you the basics of stealth." I'm grinning. "I thought I was learning combat?"

Kohl sways his black hair as he shakes his head. "That will come later. For now, I'll leave the combat up to your Loverboy." 

I get tense. "He is not my 'Loverboy'."

Kohl smiles, but I believe there's a menacing flicker in his eyes. Then his countenance hardens to "Right. Of course not." "Stand on the balls of your feet and remain there for at least a minute."

I obey, even though I blinked at him. I rise unsteadily to the balls of my feet, yet the movement seems odd. "Why?"

As I veer to the side, he continues, "It seems we have a way to go. Being of silent step is the key to being a good spy." I furrow my brow and hastily straighten my posture.

"No, we don't. I can do this perfectly fine—"

Kohl interjects, "Don't care. Focus," and I stare to shut up. I swear, his face briefly brightens up before going back to that grating, uninterested look.

Perhaps it's just to be spiteful, but I become used to feeling like I'm on my toes, and before I know it, a minute has gone by. Kohl gives a nod. "Good. Now, I want you to walk the forest without making a single noise. Go."

I stare at him in shock. It's one thing to balance on the balls of my feet, but remaining silent on a forest floor covered in twigs and dried leaves? That is just not feasible!

Kohl smiles, as if he understands that to be true. But something about his sly smile begs me to disprove him. I get ready to walk by raising myself to the balls of my feet.

"By the end of this session, I expect you to be able to sneak up on me without detection. Though, I don't have very high hopes."

To avoid saying anything I'll regret, I grit my teeth. Rather, I fix my gaze on the ground, searching intently for spots to step, but it's challenging to distinguish distinct areas of ground when everything is covered in lush green grass.

I move forward with a step. Underfoot, the leaves crunch.

Kohl gives a headshake. "No, you're not elevated high enough."

I straighten up a bit and step forward again. There's another crunch, and this time there's a twig crack.

"No, your calves aren't tightened enough. Tense them more."

I grit my teeth. I move forward one more step. Next up, another. Not one of them is silent at all.

"Nope," responds Kohl once more. My leg gives way under me as he stoop down and chops one of my calves, but I manage to stay standing. "I said, tighten your calves." 

My legs hurt from being so tight, and I start to feel angry. I wonder if karate-chopping him would go over well with him as well. If I did it across his face, perhaps he would find it more enjoyable.

I walk a few steps further. They're still loud, just a tiny bit quieter. Kohl just shakes his head and huffs more.

"Damn it, why did I ever think it was a good idea to—"

I snap, continuing walking, "Shut the hell up and let me concentrate."

Kohl scoffs. God, I wish I could just slap that dumb, apathetic expression off his gorgeous face. "Well, maybe I would if you were actually good—"

I growl, "I'm trying!" The sound of my footsteps is hardly audible above the scream of blood in my ears.

Kohl turns to face me after taking a quick look at my feet and says, "Well, you're not trying hard enough, Agnarys. You're making more sound than a baby elephant."

I snarl but maintain eye contact. I figure the least I can do is ignore him if I can't shut him out.

I bite my tongue, "You do realize that spies are supposed to make no noise at all, right?" I tell myself, don't get up for it. Avoid taking things personally.

"No?" asks Kohl. "Well, maybe I should go find myself a new spy. You know, someone who at least knows the silent step"

I tightened my jaw. My legs feel like they might break like toothpicks, they're so tight.

Kohl falls silent once more. I can practically see him shrugging. "Hmm, maybe I'll do just that."

I've had enough, at last. I lash out at him. He asks me, raising an innocent eyebrow, "Will you stop that?" "Stop what?"

"That! Your stupid goddamned commentary!"

Kohl folds his arms, grinning. I believe I'm seeing a hint of humor in his expression for the first time since we first met. "But it's working, isn't it?"

I scowl in his direction. "What?"

"You haven't made a sound for the last twenty steps. I'd say that's pretty good."

I stop and, sure enough, I see that he is correct. I had been so distracted by his incessant yammering and the rush of blood in my ears that I had not noticed my footsteps were producing no sound. 

I tread carefully, and when my foot falls silently, I feel a wave of satisfaction rush through me.

"How did you—?"

"Pride is your greatest sin, Agnarys, but it is also your greatest asset. Learn to harness it."

I give him a quick blink. Then I let out a laugh. "So, you do care."

There's something guarded in his eyes now instead of that funny look. "About what?"

"About my progress. You care about it. You genuinely want me to succeed at this, don't you?"

I'm not sure what's making him gaze at me, but I know I said something incorrectly. Kohl clasps his hands behind his back and looks forward, barely able to see. "You have me mistaken, Agnarys. I do not care about you; I do not care about anything outside of my own agenda." His gaze turns to mine. "I'm assuming you've heard about the Gahndor Curse? The Curse of Cruelty, as it's more commonly known?"

I tens up. Though it's not really something I want to talk about with him, I've been curious about this for a very long time. I nod, slowly, then.

"Well, I want you to know that the curse exists. We don't know why it exists, or how, but it's plagued our bloodline for centuries. Our cruel tendencies and lack of empathy allow us to be the ideal rulers, to get this untamed race in line and create order. You already know a Gahndor's bite alone can kill, and I firmly believe that is part of this curse, too."

My stomach drops, and I realize I'm in the presence of a beast as I gaze into Kohl's lifeless, golden eyes. Of a feelingless beast. I still have too much curiosity for my own good.

Kohl looks at me for a few extended moments before saying, "So... it's true that you cannot feel good emotion? That you cannot love?" He then gives a headshake.

We cannot feel emotional pain, and that is all related to our inability to love. You are correct that we are incapable of feeling love; the idea is alien to us, which is why we are unable to mate and why we are capable of such ruthlessness. I have never felt love, either toward my parents or any other girl, and I never will. It is what makes us such excellent rulers.

You've never had attachment to somebody, then. ever?Kohl looks coldly and says, "Never have, never will." 

"That's..." I pause. I've never really felt love either, at least not in the romantic sense. But I have loved people in the past—people like Sarah or Macy, for example—who have brightened my dark days and made my life a little easier to bear. I would gladly take arrows for these people, and that fuzzy, warm feeling I get when I'm around Alex, well, that has to count for something. awful. I apologize.

I mean it when I say that living alone and without a relationship must be incredibly lonely. Kohl seems a little surprised by this.

We just stand there in stilted quiet for a few moments until something cracks behind his back and we both turn to see an olive-skinned girl standing in the clearing; her features immediately resemble Kairi's, and judging from her mature face, she must be her elder sister.

Nirnsich turns away from me and faces the prince, a gleam in her eye as she bows and says, "Hello, your highness. Would you be interested in taking a stroll with me?"

Kohl deadpans, "It would be my pleasure," and I can't help but stare at him. He's basically leading these females on, and no matter how much they might adore him, he'll never love any of them, and for that, I feel angry with him. I feel angry at him for something that is beyond his control.

I get the impression that our training session has been cut short, and I can't help but feel cheated as I return to my room in the palace. I know the Queenstrials are his priority, but still, I am to be his spy. That is not an easy job. He takes the girl's outstretched hand and walks away without giving me a second glance.

I spend the remainder of the day in my room, interrupted only by a lengthy soak in the glass bath and a cheerful visit from Macy. It's almost dinnertime when a white envelope is pushed under my door, and after staring at it for about two minutes, I finally get up the nerve to open it.

The paper is clean and white, with only a small amount of writing in the center in neat cursive. After a few moments of squinting, I can make out the words on the parchment.

Good effort, Agnarys. Your prince, Kohl Gahndor, will give you your first mission; come to the council room after supper.

Exhilaration coursing through me, I hold the letter to my chest. 'Decent' is about as complimentary as Kohl could get, but I'll take it. I'll also take any chance to spy on him. 

I dressed in a matching black t-shirt and jeans. I will be finishing my first mission tonight, and I swear not to let Kohl down.