Jason Davenport
"I have an announcement," Greg stated, a few minutes into the small party we were having.It was a small thing we'd decided to have, just the three of us. Kind of like an after graduation party.Graduation had taken place a week after prom. Dad and Ashley had been there. It'd been nice. I'd seen Amelia as well, Adrian standing loyally beside her the entire day, except when she had to give her valedictorian speech.As I watched her afterwards taking pictures with her friends and grandma, I knew I owed her an apology. And I really wanted to. But my legs wouldn't budge.I knew I had been unfair, a monster infact, but I didn't know how to make it right. My heart broke as I thought of how disappointed Mom would be if she were here.And I couldn't even tell the guys about it because they'd be disappointed. Just like Adrian had been. And I wasn't sure I could handle losing anyone else close to me. So I kept it to myself.I knew that tAmelia ForbesThe days that followed after graduation were miserable for me. There was no school to attend, no classes to keep me busy, and no studying to distract me at all. I had nothing to keep myself busy with. So all I did was think. So much that I began to overthink, which meant I started to worry a whole lot more, about every little thing. My anxiety level shot up. And soon, I refused to leave my room.I was three and a half months pregnant, and inevitably I had begun to show. The corset was too tight to be comfortable and I had to stop wearing it. I didn't know what to do. Every time I saw Nana coming in my direction, I would duck into my bedroom and attempt to conceal my stomach with my duvet or blanket. Soon, she would notice. If she hadn't already. What would I say to her? How would I explain this. . .I couldn't talk to Dani or Benson about it. They wouldn't understand. And I hadn't seen Adrian since graduation. I wanted to text him, but
Jason DavenportI shut my eyes tight as Ashley knocked at my bedroom door. It stood wide open so obviously, she could see that I was awake. I turned over in my bed, hoping she would take a hint and go away. But instead she knocked a second time. "Do you have a minute?" She asked in her tinkly voice. I wanted to yell out a huge 'no' but I wasn't in the mood to quarrel with her. So I sat up and motioned for her to come in. She didn't sit, instead she folded her hands behind her and cleared her throat. "Look, I know you don't want to see me or talk to me, but I have something to say."I have her a blank stare. "I'm trying. I'm trying so hard. And I know you don't see it, or refuse to see it. But it's fine, I understand why."I cocked an eyebrow at her, folding my arms in front of me. "I'm the one who. . ." She trailed off, tucking a strand of her blondish pink hair behind her ears and fiddling with the hem of her sweater. "I-I pr
Amelia ForbesI had begun to feel sicker and sicker. I was throwing up more, stressing out more, and I felt tired all the time. In summary, I felt like crap. Nothing was comfortable anymore and I kept having recurring mood swings-laughing one minute and crying the next. Thankfully, Nana had resumed her volunteer work, so she was seldom home. Looking toward my table clock, the time showed that she would've left the house by now. Good. I needed to eat something. But I couldn't do that if she was home. As gently as possible, I got down from my bed and bumbled into the kitchen. After opening and closing a few drawers-not finding anything appetising to eat-I finally decided to go with cereal. Grabbing the biggest bowl we had, I emptied nearly half the box. It was as though I just realized how hungry I was. Popping the fridge open, I decided to go with yogurt instead of milk as I'd been craving it. I paused as I was about to empty the yogurt into the bowl. I f
Amelia ForbesI could feel the rapid pounding of my heart as I watched Dani stare me down. I couldn't read her expression, couldn't tell what she was feeling. My tongue hung on the roof of my mouth, dry. My lips parted but I didn't know what to say. Beside me, Adrian gently helped Nana onto a sofa and handed her a glass of water."How long did you plan on keeping this a secret?" I looked up at Dani. I'd been praying for her to say something all this while but now that she did I didn't know what to say. Her eyes were glassy and cold. I shivered a little, the thought of her hating me now freezing up my insides. "Dani, I..." I managed to blurt out. "I didn't know how.." My voice shook with each word. Adrian gave me a reassuring nod and placed a hand on Dani's shoulder. "Amelia is going through a really tough time right now-""You knew?" The accusation in her voice chilled me to my bones and I could feel the tears forming in my eyes.
Looking towards dad, I wiped my sweaty palms on my hoodie. "This girl who keeps disturbing our peace and knocking like a mad woman claims she's here to see you. So?" He gestured to Dani. "Do you know her?""I d-don't recognize-""You fucking asshole!" Dani screamed so loud the servants had to hold her back. "You monster!" She continued, seemingly oblivious to the tight hold on her shoulders. "I'll strangle you with my bare hands when I get my hands on you, you fucking piece of shit!"Dad's face reddened. You come into my house, disturb our peace, and threaten my son?!" He bellowed. Ashley gently placed her hand on his, tapping on it in a distracting motion. Dani stood, unfazed. "Why don't you ask 'your son' what he did to my friend!" She spat, anger visible on her features. She met my eyes, anger and pain dancing in them. "Why don't you tell them? Tell them how you singlehandedly ruined Amelia's life."Dad's eyebrows furrowed. He questioningly looked
Amelia ForbesI watched Dani and Ben slice vegetables in the kitchen silently. For once they weren't bickering. But they weren't talking to each other, or to me.I gave a silent sigh. Ben had found out about everything from Dani when he came over. It took both Dani and Adrian to stop him from storming off to the Davenports. Afterwards he had screamed his lungs off at me, asking why I could keep something like that from him.Then he'd cried a little. We'd all cried together. Nana included. But there was still a sad kind of tension in the air. No one was talking to each other. They'd even agreed on what to make for dinner for once without arguing. Adrian, Ben and Dani were a part of my small family now. They were constantly around-coming over early in the morning and leaving pretty late at night, although they slept over most nights. And me? I was exhausted. I was still a bit scared from Nana's dizzy spell from earlier. But I felt relieved too. The peo
Jason DavenportI was exhausted as I walked through the doors of the fourth convenience store I'd been to today. I was trying to find a job. I didn't know what that entailed, nor had I ever had one before, but I was determined to make an effort. And getting a job was a first step. I timidly walked to the counter, conscious of my damp clothes that had begun to give off a weird kind of smell. The salesclerk ignored me until I cleared my throat loudly. He paused in his typing and glared at me, scrunching his face as the stench hit his nose. Holding a napkin briefly to his nose he snapped, "What can I do for you?" My fists clenched at his snarky tone. How dare he disrespect me? People like him were my servants! My anger slowly began to dissipate as I realized it was past tense. I was a nobody now. Trying my best to ignore the attitude I said, "I'm looking for a job?" Loud guffaws from the other salesclerks ran through the air and I felt the back
Jason DavenportI sat on a bench outside a small supermarket. It was my second night sleeping in the streets. To me it still felt like a dream. I'd gotten angry, cried, begged my mother for forgiveness, but still nothing.The tiny hope I'd harbored that Dad would come looking for me has dissipated. And now I was completely hopeless, helpless. I had nowhere to go, no one to talk to. No one in town wanted to employ me because "my family acted like we owned the world". I'd never felt so tired in my entire life. And deep down I knew it was all my fault. Who do I talk to now?Maybe if mom was alive...No, I stopped myself. This was all on me. I sighed, wiping the tears that stood on my cheeks. Maybe if I made an effort, maybe if I proved myself, showed everyone that I was truly remorseful. Maybe dad would take me back. Maybe mom would stop being disappointed in me. Maybe Amelia would forgive me. Maybe Adrian would be friends with me again.
Amelia ForbesThe day had gone by so fast and it was already about time for our dinner date. Dani came over to help me get dressed. She and Adrian were open about their relationship status now and they looked so good together I thought I would cry.She did my makeup too. I didn't look perfect because I still had a little bit of my tummy showing after the delivery, but Jason didn't care. Dani enveloped me in a tight hug as she saw me off to the limo."You look amazing, Ammie," She whispered. "Off you go. Be a good girl now."I whipped around, eyes widening in embarrassment. But she only winked at me and stalked off.God, I loved to hate her.I didn't know where we were going, and no matter how many times I'd asked, Jason wouldn't tell.Finally we arrived. He had set something up at one of the spots on the hill. There were lights and food, and even someone to play the violin.Again, how would he know I loved the violin?Benson.After about an hour of
Amelia ForbesIt had been a while since I'd had the baby now. Two months precisely.I had so many dreams I had wanted to realize after high school, so much I wanted to do. But all that was gone now. At least for a while. In the beginning it had saddened me deeply. But now, all I wanted was to make sure my baby got everything she deserved, and then some more.Being a mother changes a lot. Everything, in fact. And I really love my baby, but in she's always crying, and it's even worse at night now. We finally went to the doctor a week ago and realized it was colic. Thank God.I said a silent prayer. If I'm being honest, I don't think I could've handled it alone. Especially with Nana gone. The thought of her brought tears to my eyes. She had passed away peacefully at the elderly home. And I missed her a lot. Every day I would imagine all the beautiful words she would've used if she could talk.I thought of those times when she really was the only thing that kept me go
Amelia Forbes I deliberately sipped my hot cocoa slowly, as I watched Dani say hi to Adrian briefly and walk into the kitchen toward me. She pulled up a chair and lowered herself onto it, watching me with hawk eyes."What's going on?" Her tone was crisp."What do you mean?" I cocked an eyebrow.She rolled her eyes. "So pretty boy gets into an accident and all of a sudden you move in with him?"The anger that flashed within me knew no bounds as I raised her eyes to meet hers. "It was an attempted suicide," I said quietly.Her hand froze halfway to her lips. "What?" She managed to croak. "I...I had no idea that-""No you didn't," I snapped. She hung her head but didn't say anything more."And if Nana was still home, I probably wouldn't be living here now. So please don't play that card.""I'm sorry," She managed.I shrugged, eyeing her curiously. "And what about you?" I asked innocently. "Is there anything you wanna tell me?"She threw
Jason DavenportIt'd been five days since I was discharged from the hospital. My head still hurt, but I'd never felt better. Dad had convinced me to come back home and I'd agreed, on the condition that I'd keep working until I could afford to pay for college. And it'd been going great. My friendship with Adrian was still a bit shaky but we were working things out. We'd resumed our weekly hangout at my house to play either basketball or video games and it felt nice. Sometimes Amelia popped in to check on me but she never stayed for too long."Hey?" I shook Adrian as we both sat on my bed. He quickly tried to put his phone away and I eyed him suspiciously. "Who are you texting?" I asked. He blushed. "Um, no one?"I patted his back. "Tell me everything, my friend."An hour later, Adrian had narrated the love story that had sprung between himself and Dani Daniels and I stared at him in shock."Dani?!" I stage whispered, putting a hand to my mouth. "Holy sh
Jason DavenportI still wasn't sure what miracle had occured while I was unconscious.At first when I woke up, my first feeling was that of disappointment. I was disappointed that I had survived. Once again I'd proved that I'd always be a failure.But when Amelia had barged into my ward, a crying mess, and enveloped me in a hug, I thought I was dreaming. I still couldn't wrap it around my head but I was glad for it. Whatever had happened, I prayed that it would stay that way. As I relaxed my pounding head onto the pillow, my door swung open and I swallowed as I saw Adrian walk in.He stumbled awkwardly and took a seat beside me on the bed. "Hey.""Hey."For a while we sat there, not uttering a word to each other. "Why'd you do it?" Adrian finally whispered.I didn't need to ask to know what he was talking about. I took my time to gather myself. "I guess... I guess I was just tired of being such a failure..." I trailed off.Saying it brough
Amelia ForbesI sat fidgeting in the waiting room. It'd been three hours since we arrived at the hospital and everyone was seated, quietly. The truck driver had given a clear description of what had transpired. No one said a word.Tears flowed down my cheeks. He has attempted suicide.The thought broke me down more than I thought it could. I felt sad, guilty. I blamed myself for pushing him out in the rain and saying such hard words to him.I guessed those few weeks had put him into some deep state of depression. He was in such a state that he had seen suicide as the only option. It was then that I realized that he'd been honest the whole time.He'd been sincere. All the effort he'd been putting. I stifled a sob.What if something happened to him?My heart pounded in my chest. What would I do? I couldn't take care of a child alone. I couldn't...And he was so good with her. He'd be such a good dad. I couldn't... I couldn't lose him.I burie
Jason DavenportAs Amelia pushed me out into the blasting rain, I realized something. I was exhausted.I was tired.I was tired of the crying, tired of the begging. I knew I deserved everything that was happening right now and then some more, but I was tired. This was what I'd also be. The rapist. The criminal. No matter how hard I tried. No one would ever see the good in me.And it was all my fault. I showed the good in me too late. Way too late. So late that everyone would stand waiting for me to draw the curtains and prove to them that it was all an act. I'd always be the asshole. The monster. The beast.I looked up at the sky and sobbed. "Are you disappointed in me too, mom? This is what your boy turned out to be. A useless piece of shit."I slumped to the floor, my chest feeling like it was about to explode. "I'm a criminal, mom. I lost every-every thing. My friends, my family, my dignity. This is what I've become.""Nobody wants me m-mo
Amelia Forbes"I got in."Dani walked into my room beaming, a white envelope in hand.And although I knew what she held-a college acceptance letter, I asked, "Into what?"She rolled her eyes at me and laughed. "Bloustone College?" "Oh," I finally managed to mutter after a while. Dani stared at me in disbelief. "Really? That's all you're gonna say? I've been working my ass off for this and that's all you're gonna say?" She was right. I did sound kind of selfish."I'm sorry, Dani. I didn't mean it like that," I pleaded. "Of course I'm happy for you. It just.. it took me by surprise, that's all. You know how hard I've been rooting for you."She gave me a small smile and wrapped her arms on my shoulder. "It's okay, Ammie. I'll miss you too."My throat tightened. I was going to miss her. Even more than she thought. She was one of my best friends. She'd been there for me when no one else had. She'd practically forced her way into my life.I giggled
Amelia ForbesI woke up to the soft cry of my baby girl. We'd moved her from Nana's room to the room that used to belong to my parents.Careful not to wake anyone up, I tiptoed to the room and received a startle when I saw Jason cradling her in his arms.My first thought was to go in and snatch her away from him. If he hurt her, I swear. But I waited. And I watched.I watched her stop crying as soon as he picked her up. I watched him coo her, kiss her cheek and began to hum a tune. Was he singing? I wondered, my mouth agape.What had happened to the Jason Davenport from high school? And who was this softie? Was this all an act? To gain my forgiveness?But he knew everyone was asleep. So why would he act when there wasn't an audience. I don't know how long I stood there for. But i watched them, a wide smile permanently plastered on my face. He knew just how to hold her. How to rock her back and forth so she would fall asleep.How?What changed?