THREE | MYSTERY MAN

CHAPTER THREE | MYSTERY MAN

IVY KING

A man walks inside the classroom and I find myself unconsciously taking back what I said about him being a brainless pencil that has never seen a door in his life and doesn't know how to use one.

He sure as hell has seen a lot of doors…I am almost sure he has seen more doors to have the full experience of the inside of females than I have seen doors in my life. He probably has the key to make any lady open the door– their thighs, so that he can enter their house.

I stopped my thoughts from going further because I'm in an educational establishment.

Mr mysterious man is so fucking hot. As in hot hot! Ice cream weather hot. The kind where you would eagerly lick every single drop.

I didn't know it is humanly possible for anyone to look this hot until I saw the man I am looking at.

I thought looks like this were specially reserved for angels, gods, and goddesses. Maybe his father is a god that fell in love with a human and they gave birth to him.

This guy, the one that is staring right into my eyes right this moment is definitely not human. His looks are not from this world, he looks out of this world. His body is sure as hell not a human's body, it is a body made for gods only. The tattoos all over his arm confirms my hypothesis, he is definitely a fallen angel. I am so fucking glad he fell.

I don't know who the hell this man is and I sure as hell don't know where the hell he crawled out from but there is one thing I am sure of. He is a god, probably a sex god. He might be a demon too because that body is too tasty to be an angel's.

This must be a dream. I must be in some kind of spiritual trance or some shit like that.

One time, I had a dream that I made out with Chris Brown and until now, that dream has been the best memory I have. Now, this dream would replace that. I don't even need to kiss or touch him, his stare is enough to make me lose my senses. I didn't feel butterflies in my tummy from his intense gaze, a whole fucking zoo was set loose.

Too afraid to say something so that I won't wake up, I shut my mouth tight and stare at the wonderful abomination. An abomination in the sense that he would cause an accident because women were too busy checking him out to check where she's driving.

I never want to wake up. I would happily live the rest of my life in this position, just simply having an intense stare down with this god-like looking mysterious stranger. I would willingly pause time to be in this position for the rest of my life.

Unfortunately, my dream is short lived because the stranger rolls his eyes, gives me his beautiful middle finger that I'll love to suck and walks out of the classroom, banging the door shut. The force of the door banging shut snaps me out of my elicit thoughts and I notice that unlike I expected, I am not on my bed. I am still very much in the classroom, in the same position I was earlier.

I didn't notice I was drooling until I became conscious of the fact that something is rolling down my mouth.

I slap myself a few times to make sure I wake up but I don't.

I am not dreamin. This is not a fucking dream?

Deciding to see if it's a dream or not, I run after the man. Sure enough, I catch up with him since he walks like the world is happily and patiently waiting for him to come.

I stop his movements making up my mind that this is truly a dream. He was obviously purposely walking slowly because he wanted me to catch up with him and that is something that can never happen in my reality.

The words that fall out of my mouth next bring me back to reality…the reality that I am not dreaming.

This is real life.

“I, Poison Ivy welcomes you to the clan of the abominable dream stand that fulfils the hidden chronicles of the human body which is the only thing allowing the fish to malfunction in the coconut water of the strawberry palm fronds which the seed of the living cockroach which lives in the fourth floor of the rat's apartment shall die in the bathroom of a living specimen." And yes, I said every stupid dumbing word in one breath.

At this junction, I knew I am not in delulu land because if I am, I wouldn't say something like that.

Unlike every other person that has had a taste of my lunatic rambling, the mystery guy doesn't run away. Instead, a barely noticeable smirk appears on his face and his eyes display that he is greatly amused by my ranting.

Okay, I take back what I said, this is one hundred percent a dream because no way in fucking hell would anyone, not even the mother that birthed me, would be amused by my uncontrollable rambling.

I try to fix what I said earlier by saying more but hopefully reasonable words but only ended up saying, “In heaven, you would be food to all the hungry fires who wanted to cook food in a restaurant on earth but couldn't because it wasn't their time for the sprinklers to fail them in the endurance of the slumber party."

This was my cue to facepalm.

“What I mean is…" I start saying at a snail's pace but I get cut off by him.

“Shut the fuck up." He orders in a low but demanding voice.

“Yes, Daddy." I reply automatically.

Shit! Fuck! Holy shit! Fucking hell!

Oh my fucking goodness! I did not just fucking say that.

Time stops, I run out of air, and the universe laughs at me for blindly falling into its embarrassing trap.

Sometimes, I wonder if I offended anyone in my past life…maybe I killed a bird or stepped on a puppy. I really don't understand what I did that the universe and its lover slash partner in crime, fate, has decided that my life isn't important enough to be used as anything other than a sick source of entertainment. My life must be the comedy every supernatural being goes to watch in the cinema with their dates. How else would you anyone explain most of the events that take place in my life?

Since the mysterious guy found my first statement funny, I could only hope he finds the rest funny too but one look at his face tells me that if he had a gun, he would shoot me for every letter that I just wasted and degraded by saying shit.

Fully knowing that trying to apologise would only give my rebellious mouth another opportunity to spit out trash, I huff and walk away why the fine human man watches me go.

Who the hell is he?