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2020-07-19 18:15:50Xavier's P.O.V.
All the memories from last night are rushing through my mind. The intense hurt, love and peace that coursed through me was unmatchable. I could feel myself laying on a comfy bed. Cole's. He took me back inside. Hopefully we can patch things up. The sun seemed to be shining straight down on me, through the curtains, it was so bright. The birds, they were chirping.
But I as I listened closer, something about the bird's chirps were weird, they were so... perfectly spread out from each other. So automated. I listen closely. It doesn't sound like birds anymore, more like a monitor or a system, a familiar sound. A haunting sound.
I open my eyes. The sun is right above my eyes, blinding me so. I open my eyes again, squinting to make out the light source above me.
Wait... that isn't a sun... it's a light, attached to a ceiling. I look t
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Please Stay 66.
Cole P.O.V. I walked home from the hospital that night. Hal offered me a ride, but he has already done too much. An uncomfortable moisture hung about in the air. The streets were empty but they felt crowded. Like he was there, he was everywhere. The grass reminded me of him. The grey clouds screamed his name. Yet he wasn't here. I finally reach the front door of my house. My mum opens the door. I stare at her jolly face, for a moment I feel like yelling at her. Ignorant. How could she be happy right now? But I bite my tongue, she doesn't know Cole. I give her a brief grin, lips tight in a line before heading up to my room. The house feels empty. Yet the couch, I swear I could smell him and see the dint in the cushion his body left. I stop halfway up the stairs and turn to see the kitchen. Clean. Whatever happened to yesterday? Did yesterday even happen? I lower my eyes and head off to my room and close the door behind me. "Xavier?" I call out. Yes?"I'm sorry." I respond. I hea
Last Updated : 2020-07-20Please Stay Epilogue
The professional tone of the young adult's psychiartrist echoes. Her hooded eyes scan the room. The bedroom. What was supposed to be a sanctuary was just a reminder. A reminder that she was still alive and would wake up in the same place every, single, day.Change was needed. But change was too scary, too hard, too risky. The young adult saunters cautiously around the room. Cautiously being the keyword. You are too careful. You are just existing.But things were worse and could, at any moment without her knowing become worse again. So maybe being careful was her only choice.Her eyes caught on an object, an old friend. Her doctor's voice repeating, 'bring something to me next session, something that helped you get better'. She was far from better, but was a little further from worse.Her fingers tightened around the object, and her scars tingled. The ghostly pain she inflicted on herself months ago taunted her but she
Last Updated : 2020-07-22Please Stay 1.
"I can't do this anymore!" A loud smash echoed from downstairs from the living room."He is a freak! I can't have him living in our household!""He brings disgrace to our family name."Xavier stayed in his dark room. Curled up in a ball. Wishing he was someone else. But he wasn't, and he can't change that. He sobbed quietly, not wanting his family to hear."Look at the time! It's 2:12 in the fucking morning! I need to go to work in the morning and we've wasted fucking two hours arguing about him. I'm going to bed." The man stormed off into the master bedroom, followed by the woman.Xavier checked the glowing green light which showed the time on his alarm clock."Oh." He said quietly to himself. Xavier had school tomorrow so he better get some sleep. He got up, knowing it was safe to do so, as he heard his parent snore. He got undressed and put on his pajamas
Last Updated : 2020-05-07Please Stay 2.
I looked to the ground and was greeted by my scattered books.Why didn't I notice this sooner?"Sorry." I whispered, both to the boy and myself."Sorry is not going to make the books magically appear in my fucking arms again, for Christ's sake, pick 'em up!" He demanded and he was right. It was my fault. I got to the floor and started picking up the books. Being on all fours, my knees hard against the dirty school floor was demoralising.'Dumb and blind.'I looked back up. There was something about the boy I liked. His jawline, it was captivating. A solid line from his ear, around his rounded cheeks down to his perfect chin.Stop Xavier. Be normal."Stop looking at me you freak pick up the books!" He yelled ringing my ears. Funnily enough his features didn’t seem so attractive anymore."Here." I say,
Last Updated : 2020-05-07Please Stay 3.
I run out of the class. The halls are empty. I can feel myself breaking down. I can't handle being late again."Fuck." I curse. My tears threaten to escape my eyes. Hot tears boil in the corner of my eyes. I have biology next. It's not the thought of missing out and being punished by the teachers that is scaring me. It's my parents."Control yourself. You will be fine." The voice says.'No he won't. Xavier you are hopeless. Just drop out of school.'"I need to calm down." I say. I decide to skip biology. I need to take a breather. I walk outside. It's so isolated."If he finds out. He's going to kill you." The voice says."I know. But let's not think of that now. I can't think...I miss my brothers and my sister.""Yeah. We all miss them.""Why couldn'thedie instead of them!?" I yell.
Last Updated : 2020-05-07Please Stay 4.
Stay?What was that supposed to mean?The colour of the writing really made me curious. It was very red. Almost like blood.No. No. It can't be blood. I thought to myself. The bell rang, which brought me out of my thoughts. I kept this paper. I thought about the other one.Are they clues?But why would someone give me clues? No one really knows me here.I decide to fetch the other note out of the bin."What the fuck? What are you doing you hobo?" A booming voice comes from behind me. I look up and see it's the same guy from earlier, but this time, he had a gang.I couldn't speak. His mere presence would make me feel like a thread was being sewn between my lips, painfully closing them."Well?" He stood there awaiting my response."Don't you have a class to go to?" I asked.
Last Updated : 2020-05-07Please Stay 5.
I arrived home and knocked on the door."Hello Xavier." My mother answered the door."Hi." I say as I walked in."Well, how was school? Did you settle in?" She asked.I grab a chip packet and sit down at the table.'Well I was intimidated by this guy named Shawn and then I kind of fell for this really cute boy with the most unique hair and engaging eyes, but I didn't make any friends, that was my day.'But instead I said."It was fine.""Oh okay, that's good. Your father said he will be coming home a bit late."Silence filled the house. It was awkward at first, but I tried to zone out to ignore the awkwardness."I'm going to do homework now." I say, getting up and putting the chip packet in the bin."Okay, bye sweetheart."I climb the
Last Updated : 2020-05-07Please Stay 6
I immediately regret everything I just said. Waves of heat flush through me and fill up every space in my body."You feel like you are being judged?" My father put down his briefcase and stepped closer to the table.I felt overwhelmed. Like walls closing in on my tiny and immobilised body. I was trapped and just wanted to escape."Please don't do this, come on." My mother said."No!" he snaps his head to my mother, his eyes burning into hers. He slyly turns his head towards me.“He needs to know what is right and wrong.” Quietly, the words escaped from his mouth and pierced into my heart.What is right and wrong? What doesn't he understand? I'm fine the way I am. Aren't I?"Now, tell me what you were saying to your mother!" With each word he slammed his hand down on the table, causing me to flinch.Should I tell him?
Last Updated : 2020-05-20
Latest chapter
Please Stay Epilogue
The professional tone of the young adult's psychiartrist echoes. Her hooded eyes scan the room. The bedroom. What was supposed to be a sanctuary was just a reminder. A reminder that she was still alive and would wake up in the same place every, single, day.Change was needed. But change was too scary, too hard, too risky. The young adult saunters cautiously around the room. Cautiously being the keyword. You are too careful. You are just existing.But things were worse and could, at any moment without her knowing become worse again. So maybe being careful was her only choice.Her eyes caught on an object, an old friend. Her doctor's voice repeating, 'bring something to me next session, something that helped you get better'. She was far from better, but was a little further from worse.Her fingers tightened around the object, and her scars tingled. The ghostly pain she inflicted on herself months ago taunted her but she
Please Stay 66.
Cole P.O.V. I walked home from the hospital that night. Hal offered me a ride, but he has already done too much. An uncomfortable moisture hung about in the air. The streets were empty but they felt crowded. Like he was there, he was everywhere. The grass reminded me of him. The grey clouds screamed his name. Yet he wasn't here. I finally reach the front door of my house. My mum opens the door. I stare at her jolly face, for a moment I feel like yelling at her. Ignorant. How could she be happy right now? But I bite my tongue, she doesn't know Cole. I give her a brief grin, lips tight in a line before heading up to my room. The house feels empty. Yet the couch, I swear I could smell him and see the dint in the cushion his body left. I stop halfway up the stairs and turn to see the kitchen. Clean. Whatever happened to yesterday? Did yesterday even happen? I lower my eyes and head off to my room and close the door behind me. "Xavier?" I call out. Yes?"I'm sorry." I respond. I hea
Please Stay 65.
Xavier's P.O.V.All the memories from last night are rushing through my mind. The intense hurt, love and peace that coursed through me was unmatchable. I could feel myself laying on a comfy bed. Cole's. He took me back inside. Hopefully we can patch things up. The sun seemed to be shining straight down on me, through the curtains, it was so bright. The birds, they were chirping.But I as I listened closer, something about the bird's chirps were weird, they were so... perfectly spread out from each other. So automated. I listen closely. It doesn't sound like birds anymore, more like a monitor or a system, a familiar sound. A haunting sound.I open my eyes. The sun is right above my eyes, blinding me so. I open my eyes again, squinting to make out the light source above me.Wait... that isn't a sun... it's a light, attached to a ceiling. I look t
Please Stay 64.
Xavier's P.O.V.We freeze. I just hang where I am. Time stops and his warm touch turns cold and feels invasive. Blinking, I step away, my nose burns as well as my eyes. My eyes trained on a distant spot in front of me.My arms were stretched out in front of me, I felt like a stone statue, or rather, the statues in Pompeii. Burnt and frozen.Cole's posture thaws and I see his slight movement. I lift my wide eyes towards his hooded ones. His mouth contorted in regret and guilt. For the first time, I see the ugliness of him. Even through my blurry and shaky vision, his features seem sharp and painted with a cruel brush. Like my whole body realised, my skin feels hot but cold. Shrouded in this greyness of betrayal and hurt, like no other."I'm sorry." He mouths. His voice is too distant for me to hear. Muffled. Like I was under water. Everything was slow, stilll and quiet. But the excruciating pain was deafening and all I co
Please Stay 63.
Cole's P.O.V.I wake up feeling excited, butterflies swirl in my stomach. I creep out of bed carefuly, trying not to pulll the blankets off Xavier's sleeping body.I walk into the bathroom and freshen up, it's been two weeks coming. Today, is going to be Xavier's day. His condition is deteriorating. Each day that he wakes up, his jaw becomes more defined and his face hollow. Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night and stare at this deathly person before me. His skin is getting as white as the moon that shines in our bedroom at night and illuminates his ghostly face.On the outside, he wasn't the Xavier I knew and it hurt me that I could find him resistable. It really hurt.Sometimes I my eyes will open and my heart would leap into my mouth.Is he dead? I keep on asking myself at night when I wak
Please Stay 62.
Cole's P.O.V.I tear my mind away from these dangerous thoughts and took in my surrondings."A music store..." I exhale in wonderment. Xavier and music huh? Why did I never know this? It hurt a little and only made those dangerous thoughts stronger. "Come." Hal smiled and walked into the store.Instruments were hung and some were laid on the floor. I saw a drum set and was instantly taken back to my childhood. I stopped and just admired them. Hal noticed and stood next to me, he had a lopsided smile playing on his face."Are you a drummer?" He asks, hands in his pockets. I raise my eyebrows. "I thought I was going to be." I admit. I look back up at Hal, my heart pounds a little faster. He turns his head to the drums. "Not too late." With that he continues strolling down the aisle leaving me feeling a whirlpool of emotions I've never felt before. It scared me.I didn't know if I was just phsyically attracted
Please Stay 61.
Cole's P.O.V.I watch Xavier enter the building. His little body in this huge, grey towering building. My heart breaks and beats for him.All of a sudden, my mind screams at me, no, it begs me. I need to show him how much he means, before it's too late. Wait, it won't ever be too late, he'll be cured and we can live out our lives together. Get out of this God forsaken town and go somewhere fascinating. Italy, France, anywhere. We can grow our own fruits and vegetables, pick strawberries by day and seductively eat them at night by the romantic moonlight.Yes, that is what will happen. I know it. I need to show him now though. I pull my mind out of this fantasy and remember it's the last day of school.I shake my head.One day is all I need, to create a memory that will last a lifetime.I decide to ditch school. My stoma
Please Stay 60.
Xavier's P.O.V.I get out of the shower, dry myself and head back into the bedroom to see Cole sitting on the bed in a black tank-top and black skinny jeans. His toned arms and legs on show. I blush at the sight."You can go have a shower now." I tell him, avoiding his gaze whilst folding the dirty towel and placing it in the corner so I could put in the wash later."Nah it's all good. I'll have one when we get back." He says chucking his phone to the side of him and falling back onto the bed, his arms behind his head."So are you having a treatment today?" He casually asks. His tone kind of irritates me, but I wasn't sure whether I was annoyed at him or at my illness. I decide to throw the idea away."Uh, yeah I guess." I reply, laying across Cole's body in the opposite direction, so the back of me was rest
Please Stay 59.
Xavier's P.O.V."Boys!""Boys!""Cole?"I open my eyes, they feel so heavy. I blink a couple of times to get used to the light."Xavier? Cole?" Cole's mother's voice echoes from the stairs as I hear her heading towards Cole's room. I look around, my mind is as sharp as it should be when I just wake up. I see Cole next to me, sleeping peacefully. His body in a sort of star fish position. He has no shirt on. I look at myself, I also don't have a shirt. I lift up the blankets and see we both have no pants on either."Shit." I mutter through a stifled laugh."Guys, I'm coming in," I hear Cole's mum call from outside. Panic sets in, she can't see us like this. I quickly push Cole off the bed, making it look like we hadn't sleep together. I then pull the blankets up to c
