Chapter Five

What the fuck am I doing?

I ask myself this question for quite literally the hundredth time as I drive down the slightly familiar road that leads me to Ike's territory.

I didn't want a mate.

Rejection is an option.

I was taught it hurts, hurts worse than any pain imaginable.

But if I can rip this band aid off and be done with it, then I can heal faster. And since we can barely even say we know each other, there will be no loose ends to tie up. I can just, disappear, if I needed to.  I can get back to my life, to how things used to be. You know you weren't happy before. Alone. No... maybe not. But I'm certainly not enjoying my existence any more now.

And besides.

I'm doing him a favor.

Why in the fuck would an Alpha want a panther as a mate? I'm damaged goods.

My heart feels like it's going to explode with excitement as I pull into the state park's gravel parking lot. Tiny rocks crunch under my car's tires as I come to a stop, put my car in park, and turn it off. I sit there for a moment though, eyeing the trees in front of me.

 It's cold today, almost freezing temperatures. I can tell this winter is going to be a long one. Frost is already kissing the tree's needled branches, and the sun is barely peeking through puffy clouds.

I sat there for a moment longer before finally climbing out of my car. I lock the doors and check around me. There are no other cars here. Not exactly hiking weather, I guess. I once again tuck my keys under my tire, getting a feeling of Deja vu.

I begin walking towards the tree line, ignoring my racing heart and focusing on the sound of pebbles beneath my sandals.

I keep walking, inhaling deeply. I follow my weak scent from two weeks ago. It's barely there now, the rain and other animals have washed it away. I can only detect it because I'm looking for it.

Within twenty minutes I'm back where I first met Ike. I close my eyes and inhale; I think I catch a smell of pear, although it's so faint I could be imagining it. What now? Asks my panther. I stand there a moment longer, weighing my options.

"We follow what we can." I say simply and begin moving again. I can feel her growing more and more excited. She wants to be let out; I can tell. But I think she thinks asking that of me right now would be pushing her luck. I'm grateful I've been blessed with such a self aware partner.

 I follow what I think is his old scent deeper into the trees. The forest is thickening now, I have to turn sideways at some points to squeeze in between trees and massive, overgrown shrubs. Pinecones and fallen sticks crunch and snap under my feet. I can feet their rough broken bark scraping against my slightly exposed feet. I should've worn different shoes.

It's curious how fast they found me last time. And now, I can't hear a sound. While my senses aren't as good in my human form as they are in panther, I certainly would be able to hear a giant wolf coming my way.

It's because you're in your human form. Often packs only become alarmed when a rogue wolf or another shifter comes onto their territory. Or maybe they're distracted. I can practically feel her shrug with her last statement. While I'm still curious, I push the thought to the back of my mind.

His scent is a bit stronger now, fresher. Like he's been in this area more recently. I stop, looking around. The trees are beginning to thin out again. I'm no longer having to fight so hard to get through them.

If I strain my ears really hard, I can hear voices nearby. I can hear... laughing. Barking.

Wolves.

I followed the sounds and smells until the pack finally came into view.

Now that I was standing here, using a thick tree to shield my body from view, I was beginning to wonder yet again what the fuck I was doing. What was my plan now? Walk up to him, say, "rejected, have a nice life!" and walk away? Somehow, I didn't think it'd be that easy.

I watched the pack for what felt like an hour, barely even breathing. They had set up in the middle of a giant clearing. I could see tree stumps towards the far side of the field and guessed they had gotten rid of some of the trees to make room for themselves.

The biggest house, which was made of dark red brick, was in the back. It looked to be two stories tall, not giant, but nothing dinky. The rest of the homes were smaller, two bedrooms at most, and they formed a half circle a little bit away from the biggest building, on the other side of the field. They kind of looked like those really nice sheds you see in hardware store parking lots. But slightly bigger and I'm sure with more amenities.  They were all pushed towards the outer edges, in a rough circle.  There were no cars that I could see. In the middle of the houses was where people seemed to congregate, talking, doing whatever. Some were in human form, cooking meat over a huge fire, goofing around with children. I could see wolves splattered here and there, some dragging dead animals. It was getting late in the day; I imagine it was dinner time for this pack.

Altogether, I would say it was a pack of about fifty. Standard size.

Most packs liked to be away from humans, and most ended up looking something like this. Tucked away in the woods, preferring to live off the land as much as possible. That's not to say wolves are cavemen. I could see ac units, iPhones tucked into back pockets, and guessed there was running water.

Are we going to just stand here all day or...? My panther was getting antsy, rightfully so. I've been standing here watching this pack for a while now.

I puffed up my cheeks and gathered all the courage I had left in me. "Here goes nothing..." I say to myself and step out from behind the tree. Almost immediately I see eyes shift to look at me, and the air changes.

Suddenly wolves are rushing me, snarling and baring saliva-covered teeth at me. Women are snatching their children into their arms and rushing them inside as though I was going to eat them. I hold my hands up above my head, trying to show I meant no harm. They acted like they already knew I was a panther. I guess they could've, but that seemed awfully fast.

My eyes scan over the pack, taking who I can in. As previously mentioned, most of the pack is running away, like they don't kill Bambi's mom and eat her for dinner every day. The ones that remain look to be the strongest. I recognize Matt, who is eyeing me with curiosity. There's a strong possibility he knows I am Ike's mate, or at least heavily suspects. Other than that, there are three women and five men, most with cool super villain scars on their faces. Wolves tended to play rough.

My panther whines at my lack of focus on the mission on hand, and I make my eyes look over to meet the dark ones of Ike, who is currently storming out of the house in the back, slamming the door behind him and pulling his shirt off over his head, most likely preparing to shift for a fight. I felt my heart ache a little at the sight of him. How could I miss a man I didn't even know?

He froze as he finally registered who I was.

"Cleo...?" I could hear him, even from across the clearing. Even above all the growling and frantic talking and guards demanding to know who I was. It was like my hearing was hyper focused. I only cared about his words.

Finally, he's directly in front of me. My eyes leave his to trail down his naked top half, and I feel heat rushing up to my face. He's fucking cut, I'll give him that. Having abs isn't as easy as people think it is, it takes constant working out and a strict diet, even for wolves.  We may have a much higher metabolism than humans, but trust me when I say, we're not all lean and sexy.

"Hi." I say simply, lowering my hands to my sides. The pack has settled a bit seeing that he knows me, but no one has let their guard down completely. I can still feel the electricity and tension in the air. I can also feel a lot of eyeballs scanning me over and it was making my panther and I very fidgety.

"What are you doing here?"

"I think we should talk." I say, taking a step towards him. His warriors bristle, and I am once again faced with growls and bared fangs.

He holds his hand out in a stop gesture and takes a step closer to me. "It's fine, she's my mate."

He nods his head towards his house, and I hesitantly follow after him. "Let's talk." He says. I gulp, and nod.

Here we go.