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Chapter 88
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Only Regrets Chapter 89
I take steps backwards, and as my feet touch the couch, I collapse onto the couch, sobbing uncontrollably. Aiden tries to speak, but I can’t hear him through the sound of my own heartbreak.I just sit here, feeling lost and broken. The anger I felt moments ago is gone, replaced by an overwhelming numbness. I can’t find the will to think or react—only the dull ache in my chest and the silence around me.Aiden approaches me and kneels down in front of me. “Slap me a thousand times more, but trust me…I love you,” he says, brushing his fingers on my feet. “Please, give me a chance. I will never hurt you again.”I'm just staring at Aiden as he talks, but his words barely register. I feel numb, like I’m in a daze. The pain in my heart is so overwhelming that I can’t even process it fully. It’s like a dull, constant ache that won’t go away, no matter how much I cry or scream."My mother used to say that when I will grow up, a prince will come, riding a white horse from the moon, to sweep me
Only Regrets Chapter 90
“I thought you were the guy I met in Corsica, so I made you my boyfriend,” I say, glancing away briefly. “That's why I accepted your proposal.”“So, all this time, you thought I was someone else? Someone you met in your childhood? I was never enough on my own, was I?” Aiden’s voice trembles with pain.His words cut deep, each one a reminder of my own misguided beliefs. How could I have been so blind?“I thought you loved me for me,” he continues, his eyes searching mine for answers. “But now I realize you were just seeing a ghost from your past.”Guilt washes over me, heavy and suffocating. “Aiden, I…I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I was just…” I pause, as my words falter, caught in the web of my own mistakes.“I thought you liked me,” he says, his voice breaking. “I thought what we had was real. I thought you were my forever. But now I see it was all based on a lie.”“I never meant to deceive you, Aiden. I cared for you, truly. It’s just…when I met you, everything about you
Only Regrets Chapter 91
I try to calm myself down, taking deep breaths and wiping away my tears. My mind starts wandering, grasping at any thought to distract me from the pain. Did the guy from Corsica even exist? Or was he just a figment of my imagination? A coping mechanism I created to escape the harsh reality of my life?I wipe my tears, grab my bag, and emerge towards the door. I walk out of Aiden's apartment, feeling numb. My heart aches, my mind is a whirlwind of confusion and pain. As I step onto the crowded street, the weight of everything crashes down on me. I keep my head down, not wanting to face the world, when suddenly, I feel a familiar gaze. I look up, and there he is. Ethan. His eyes are teary, and he’s standing among the bustling crowd, looking right at me.Before I can react, he moves towards me, closing the distance between us in a heartbeat. He grabs my arms gently but firmly, his eyes searching mine. "Did you not miss me for a single day?” he says, and a tear escapes his eye. “I was d
Only Regrets Chapter 92
I feel like I’m on the verge of breaking down. The more I think about Aiden’s behavior, that boy from Corsica, and my own reactions, the more I feel like my mind is about to explode. I can’t take it anymore. The constant barrage of abrupt thoughts and overwhelming emotions—is becoming unbearable. I need to understand why I’m imagining these things, why my behavior has become so erratic. There has to be a reason behind it all, and I’m desperate to find some clarity.I need someone who can help me navigate these chaotic thoughts and emotions, someone who can help me understand what’s going on in my mind. I’m scared, but I know that I can’t continue living like this. It’s time to confront my fears head-on and find the answers I need to start healing. I make an appointment with a therapist, hoping that this step will lead me towards understanding and peace.Sitting in the therapist's cozy office, I feel a knot in my stomach. The room is softly lit, filled with warm colors and comforting
Only Regrets Chapter 93
As I continue walking on the road, a new wave of doubt and guilt washes over me. Isn't it selfish to ask Ethan to wait for me? The thought gnaws at me, making my steps feel heavier with each passing moment. I don’t want him to put his life on hold because of me. I stop walking, staring at the world moving around me, and the realization hits hard. How can I expect Ethan to wait indefinitely while I sort through my chaos? He deserves someone who is present and whole, not someone who is lost in a sea of confusion and pain."I can't do this to him," I whisper to myself, the words sounding as hollow as I feel. "It's not fair."Dr. Anderson’s advice echoes in my mind, but so does the growing certainty that asking Ethan to wait for me is wrong. I love him too much to bind him to my uncertain future. The best thing I can do for him is to let him go, to give him the freedom to live his life without the burden of my struggles.But the thought of losing him, of not having him by my side, is alm
Only Regrets Chapter 94
Days slip away, one blending into the next, and I’m stuck in a fog of confusion and sadness. Each morning, I wake up hoping for some clarity, but I just end up feeling more lost. I'm tired of fighting battles no one else can see. It's exhausting being the only one carrying this burden.I’ve been avoiding Ethan and Aiden, unable to face either of them or my own chaotic emotions. I've been taking medications the psychiatrist has prescribed me. The past weeks and months have felt like a never-ending cycle of overthinking and heartache.Tonight is prom night, and I put on a bodycon red mini dress with a deep plunge neckline. I tie the halter neck around my neck, leaving my back bare. It hugs my body perfectly, but as I stand in front of the mirror, I see a reflection that’s both familiar and strange. My eyes are red and puffy from crying, and my expression is distant. The dress should make me feel confident, but instead, it highlights how conflicted I am inside.I’m caught between wanting
Only Regrets Chapter 95
I burst into the washroom, needing a moment to gather myself. Before I can catch my breath, the door flies open behind me. I turn, my heart pounding, to see Ethan standing there, eyes burning with intensity. Is he really here or is it my hallucination this time?"Ethan, what are you…” I begin, but he doesn't let me finish. He strides over, pinning me against the door with a desperate urgency. His lips crash into mine, hungry and insistent."You're looking beautiful, sweetheart," he murmurs between our kisses. The intensity in his eyes sends a shiver down my spine as he pulls me closer. His lips are on mine again, kissing me hungrily, passionately.I can feel the heat of his breath mingling with mine, and his touch is electrifying. He sucks on my lower lip, his kisses fierce and demanding, as if he's trying to draw out every ounce of emotion I have. My head spins with the sensation, the world narrowing down to just the two of us. His hands cradle my face, holding me in place as our lip
Only Regrets Chapter 96
As he kisses and touches me, his hands roam possessively over my body. I gasp, feeling overwhelmed and exposed.“Ethan, it's enough,” I whisper against his lips.“No, it's not. I want more of you, sweetheart,” he whispers, his voice raw with desire. "What if someone enters and sees me like this?" I ask, my voice trembling with a mix of fear and desire. “I don't want anyone else seeing me in this semi nude form.”“You’re mine, Belle,” he murmurs, his voice low and possessive. “Every part of you is mine, and only mine. If anyone else dares to see what’s meant for me alone, I’ll make sure they regret it.”He looks at me with a fierce, possessive glare. "If anyone dares to see you like this," he growls, his voice dripping with intensity, "I'II make that person blind. No one can dare to take a glimpse of your naked form until I'm breathing. No one means no one.”Hearing Ethan's words, my heart pounds in my chest. The intensity in his voice, the fierce protectiveness in his eyes—it sends a
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Only Regrets Epilogue 2
The next day, overwhelmed by the realization that the boy from Corsica is actually Ethan, I decide to leave Sofia. I head to Corsica, hoping to relive the feelings and memories from my childhood, to see if they can help me understand the emotions that have been haunting me.The waves gently lap at the shore as I sit alone on the familiar sand of Ajaccio Beach, the place where our story began. The sun is setting, casting the sky in a warm, orange glow, but all I can feel is the cold emptiness in my heart, all I feel is the heavy weight of unanswered questions pressing down on me.I close my eyes, and in my mind, I can see Ethan sitting beside me, just like we used to. I lean my head on his shoulder, feeling the familiar comfort of his presence, even if it’s only in my imagination.“Why, Ethan?” I whisper, my voice trembling with the ache in my heart. “Why did you leave me waiting all these years? Why didn’t you come back for me?”Tears spill over, sliding down my cheeks as I continue,
Only Regrets Epilogue 1
I fold the letter and slip it into an envelope, carefully writing ‘A Letter I'll Never Give to Ethan’ on the front. I place the envelope in the book Beauty and the Beast, alongside the first rose Ethan gave me, the one I have pressed between the pages. With a deep sigh, I shut the book, trying to push away the lingering sadness.Just then, my phone rings. I answer, and my heart skips a beat when I hear it's a modeling contract offer.“Hello, Belle?” a voice on the other end says. “We’re thrilled to inform you that your first major modeling contract has been finalized. You’ll be featured on a billboard in Paris.”My eyes widen in disbelief. Paris—the city where fashion dreams come true—is where my face will be showcased. The excitement and pride swell inside me as I thank the caller and hang up, my mind racing with the reality of this incredible milestone.As soon as I hang up, tears well up in my eyes. This is my first major contract, a clear sign that my hard work is paying off. Over
Only Regrets Chapter 102
Ethan looks more grown-up now. If I'm twenty, he might be twenty one, I guess. He looks more like a man than the teenage boy I remember. He still has that same cold, intense look in his dark brown eyes and his jaw remains tight, just like before. But now, these expressions are framed by a more mature face. Seeing Ethan taking slow, deliberate steps toward me, my heart begins to pound so hard that I can hear it echoing in my ears. Everything around us fades away, leaving just the two of us, lost in each other’s gaze. I can’t move, can’t think—only feel the magnetic pull between us growing stronger with each step he takes. “Are you really here?” I whisper, as he finally reaches me, my voice trembling with disbelief.“Yes, I’m here,” he replies softly, his eyes shimmering with tears.Tears brim in my eyes as I lock my eyes with his. “I don't believe it,” I mumble. Seeing him here now feels like a dream I don’t want to wake up from. “I'm imagining you.”It has been two years since we sa
Only Regrets Chapter 101
It has been two years since I left New York City and Ethan behind. Now, at twenty, my life has changed dramatically. I’m thriving as a model, spending long days and nights on my modeling career. Photoshoots, fashion shows, and casting calls fill my calendar, leaving little room for anything else. When I'm not modeling, I'm handling my father's hotels and resorts businesses, trying to prove myself in a world that demands so much. It feels amazing, earning money by myself at this young age. In the whirlwind of responsibilities and ambitions, I've almost forgotten about love. Due to my busy schedule, I've completely let go of the idea of relationships and dating now. Two years have passed, and my shoulder-length hair—that had once been trimmed by Aiden—now falls comfortably to my mid-back. While it’s not as long as it was before, it has grown out beautifully, mirroring the changes and growth in my own life.I had been taking my medications and therapy sessions for schizophrenia as well,
Only Regrets Chapter 100
The journey back to Sofia feels like a blur. I sit in the private jet with my father, staring out the window but seeing nothing. My mind is consumed with thoughts of Ethan, the pain of our separation pricking my heart. Once we land, I retreat into the familiarity of our mansion, but it offers no comfort. Days turn into weeks, and weeks into months, yet the ache remains. I isolate myself, shutting out the world and everyone in it. My parents are frustrated with my demeanor, especially my mother, who doesn’t understand why I’ve stopped caring about everything I once loved.In the solitude of my room, time seems to stretch endlessly. I spend hours staring out the window, feeling no shift in my own heart. The walls of my room, once comforting, now feel like a cage. Every object, every corner, reminds me of Ethan, of what we had, and what I’ve lost. And Ethan's hallucinations make it even harder to forget about him. “Belle, you need to get out of this house,” my mother snaps one day from
Only Regrets Chapter 99
As graduation day approaches, the excitement that usually accompanies the end of high school is overshadowed by a deep sense of melancholy. I’ve spent the past few days packing up my belongings, preparing to leave the dorm that has been my home for these formative years. Every item I pack feels like a piece of my past being sealed away, and the act of boxing up my life brings an unexpected weight to my chest.The day arrives with its usual pomp and ceremony. The campus is filled with graduates in their caps and gowns, the air buzzing with a mix of excitement and nostalgia. The graduation ceremony itself is a blur of speeches and applause. I’m called up to receive my diploma, a moment that should have been filled with pride and joy. Instead, it’s tinged with sadness, as I feel the weight of everything that has happened. The graduation ceremony is also the final chance to see everyone before we all go our separate ways. Friends and acquaintances gather for one last hurrah. The atmosphe
Only Regrets Chapter 98
I push open the heavy wooden doors of the church, the familiar creak echoing softly through the quiet space. I walk down the aisle, my footsteps muted by the worn carpet, and make my way to my usual spot—a solitary pew in the corner.The church is dimly lit, shimmering with a soft glow from the candles flickering by the altar. I sit down, feeling the weight of my heart pressing heavily on my chest. I bow my head, folding my hands in my lap, and let out a shuddering breath."God, it’s me again," I whisper, my voice trembling with emotion. "I’m not sure how to start this conversation. I don’t even know where to begin."I close my eyes, trying to steady my racing thoughts. Ethan’s face flashes in my mind, and my tears begin to fall, tracing hot lines down my cheeks."I don’t understand why things had to end this way. I wanted so much more. I thought we had a chance, a real chance to be happy together."I take a deep breath, trying to calm the storm inside me."He said he loved me, but I
Only Regrets Chapter 97
Ethan comes running behind me, asking me to stop for a second. As I keep on walking on the road, my vision blurs by the car headlights. I'm too lost in my thoughts to notice the car speeding towards me. Suddenly, I feel a strong hand grab my arm, pulling me back just in time."Belle, what the hell are you doing?" Ethan yells, his voice filled with panic and anger.I can hardly breathe, my heart pounding from the close call. I look up at him, and his eyes are filled with a mixture of relief and fury. My mind feels like it’s spinning, and I can’t tell what’s real or just a trick of my mind. Everything around me seems to blur, and I feel disconnected from my own thoughts. It’s like I’m trapped in a fog, struggling to understand what’s happening.I'm just done with my life. The schizophrenia makes it hard to define for me what's real or what's hallucination. I've literally gone mad. It would be better if I would have bumped into that car. Why did he pull me back?“Why the hell are you he
Only Regrets Chapter 96
As he kisses and touches me, his hands roam possessively over my body. I gasp, feeling overwhelmed and exposed.“Ethan, it's enough,” I whisper against his lips.“No, it's not. I want more of you, sweetheart,” he whispers, his voice raw with desire. "What if someone enters and sees me like this?" I ask, my voice trembling with a mix of fear and desire. “I don't want anyone else seeing me in this semi nude form.”“You’re mine, Belle,” he murmurs, his voice low and possessive. “Every part of you is mine, and only mine. If anyone else dares to see what’s meant for me alone, I’ll make sure they regret it.”He looks at me with a fierce, possessive glare. "If anyone dares to see you like this," he growls, his voice dripping with intensity, "I'II make that person blind. No one can dare to take a glimpse of your naked form until I'm breathing. No one means no one.”Hearing Ethan's words, my heart pounds in my chest. The intensity in his voice, the fierce protectiveness in his eyes—it sends a
