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Chapter 90
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Only Regrets Chapter 91
I try to calm myself down, taking deep breaths and wiping away my tears. My mind starts wandering, grasping at any thought to distract me from the pain. Did the guy from Corsica even exist? Or was he just a figment of my imagination? A coping mechanism I created to escape the harsh reality of my life?I wipe my tears, grab my bag, and emerge towards the door. I walk out of Aiden's apartment, feeling numb. My heart aches, my mind is a whirlwind of confusion and pain. As I step onto the crowded street, the weight of everything crashes down on me. I keep my head down, not wanting to face the world, when suddenly, I feel a familiar gaze. I look up, and there he is. Ethan. His eyes are teary, and he’s standing among the bustling crowd, looking right at me.Before I can react, he moves towards me, closing the distance between us in a heartbeat. He grabs my arms gently but firmly, his eyes searching mine. "Did you not miss me for a single day?” he says, and a tear escapes his eye. “I was d
Only Regrets Chapter 92
I feel like I’m on the verge of breaking down. The more I think about Aiden’s behavior, that boy from Corsica, and my own reactions, the more I feel like my mind is about to explode. I can’t take it anymore. The constant barrage of abrupt thoughts and overwhelming emotions—is becoming unbearable. I need to understand why I’m imagining these things, why my behavior has become so erratic. There has to be a reason behind it all, and I’m desperate to find some clarity.I need someone who can help me navigate these chaotic thoughts and emotions, someone who can help me understand what’s going on in my mind. I’m scared, but I know that I can’t continue living like this. It’s time to confront my fears head-on and find the answers I need to start healing. I make an appointment with a therapist, hoping that this step will lead me towards understanding and peace.Sitting in the therapist's cozy office, I feel a knot in my stomach. The room is softly lit, filled with warm colors and comforting
Only Regrets Chapter 93
As I continue walking on the road, a new wave of doubt and guilt washes over me. Isn't it selfish to ask Ethan to wait for me? The thought gnaws at me, making my steps feel heavier with each passing moment. I don’t want him to put his life on hold because of me. I stop walking, staring at the world moving around me, and the realization hits hard. How can I expect Ethan to wait indefinitely while I sort through my chaos? He deserves someone who is present and whole, not someone who is lost in a sea of confusion and pain."I can't do this to him," I whisper to myself, the words sounding as hollow as I feel. "It's not fair."Dr. Anderson’s advice echoes in my mind, but so does the growing certainty that asking Ethan to wait for me is wrong. I love him too much to bind him to my uncertain future. The best thing I can do for him is to let him go, to give him the freedom to live his life without the burden of my struggles.But the thought of losing him, of not having him by my side, is alm
Only Regrets Chapter 94
Days slip away, one blending into the next, and I’m stuck in a fog of confusion and sadness. Each morning, I wake up hoping for some clarity, but I just end up feeling more lost. I'm tired of fighting battles no one else can see. It's exhausting being the only one carrying this burden.I’ve been avoiding Ethan and Aiden, unable to face either of them or my own chaotic emotions. I've been taking medications the psychiatrist has prescribed me. The past weeks and months have felt like a never-ending cycle of overthinking and heartache.Tonight is prom night, and I put on a bodycon red mini dress with a deep plunge neckline. I tie the halter neck around my neck, leaving my back bare. It hugs my body perfectly, but as I stand in front of the mirror, I see a reflection that’s both familiar and strange. My eyes are red and puffy from crying, and my expression is distant. The dress should make me feel confident, but instead, it highlights how conflicted I am inside.I’m caught between wanting
Only Regrets Chapter 95
I burst into the washroom, needing a moment to gather myself. Before I can catch my breath, the door flies open behind me. I turn, my heart pounding, to see Ethan standing there, eyes burning with intensity. Is he really here or is it my hallucination this time?"Ethan, what are you…” I begin, but he doesn't let me finish. He strides over, pinning me against the door with a desperate urgency. His lips crash into mine, hungry and insistent."You're looking beautiful, sweetheart," he murmurs between our kisses. The intensity in his eyes sends a shiver down my spine as he pulls me closer. His lips are on mine again, kissing me hungrily, passionately.I can feel the heat of his breath mingling with mine, and his touch is electrifying. He sucks on my lower lip, his kisses fierce and demanding, as if he's trying to draw out every ounce of emotion I have. My head spins with the sensation, the world narrowing down to just the two of us. His hands cradle my face, holding me in place as our lip
Only Regrets Chapter 96
As he kisses and touches me, his hands roam possessively over my body. I gasp, feeling overwhelmed and exposed.“Ethan, it's enough,” I whisper against his lips.“No, it's not. I want more of you, sweetheart,” he whispers, his voice raw with desire. "What if someone enters and sees me like this?" I ask, my voice trembling with a mix of fear and desire. “I don't want anyone else seeing me in this semi nude form.”“You’re mine, Belle,” he murmurs, his voice low and possessive. “Every part of you is mine, and only mine. If anyone else dares to see what’s meant for me alone, I’ll make sure they regret it.”He looks at me with a fierce, possessive glare. "If anyone dares to see you like this," he growls, his voice dripping with intensity, "I'II make that person blind. No one can dare to take a glimpse of your naked form until I'm breathing. No one means no one.”Hearing Ethan's words, my heart pounds in my chest. The intensity in his voice, the fierce protectiveness in his eyes—it sends a
Only Regrets Chapter 97
Ethan comes running behind me, asking me to stop for a second. As I keep on walking on the road, my vision blurs by the car headlights. I'm too lost in my thoughts to notice the car speeding towards me. Suddenly, I feel a strong hand grab my arm, pulling me back just in time."Belle, what the hell are you doing?" Ethan yells, his voice filled with panic and anger.I can hardly breathe, my heart pounding from the close call. I look up at him, and his eyes are filled with a mixture of relief and fury. My mind feels like it’s spinning, and I can’t tell what’s real or just a trick of my mind. Everything around me seems to blur, and I feel disconnected from my own thoughts. It’s like I’m trapped in a fog, struggling to understand what’s happening.I'm just done with my life. The schizophrenia makes it hard to define for me what's real or what's hallucination. I've literally gone mad. It would be better if I would have bumped into that car. Why did he pull me back?“Why the hell are you he
Only Regrets Chapter 98
I push open the heavy wooden doors of the church, the familiar creak echoing softly through the quiet space. I walk down the aisle, my footsteps muted by the worn carpet, and make my way to my usual spot—a solitary pew in the corner.The church is dimly lit, shimmering with a soft glow from the candles flickering by the altar. I sit down, feeling the weight of my heart pressing heavily on my chest. I bow my head, folding my hands in my lap, and let out a shuddering breath."God, it’s me again," I whisper, my voice trembling with emotion. "I’m not sure how to start this conversation. I don’t even know where to begin."I close my eyes, trying to steady my racing thoughts. Ethan’s face flashes in my mind, and my tears begin to fall, tracing hot lines down my cheeks."I don’t understand why things had to end this way. I wanted so much more. I thought we had a chance, a real chance to be happy together."I take a deep breath, trying to calm the storm inside me."He said he loved me, but I
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