Astra stared at her own personal copy of the divorce letter, and the pain still felt the same. Five years down the lane, she still feels so bad for not putting in her best, for not trying to fight hard for her marriage, for not attempting to fight for the love they shared. Maybe she wasn’t the problem; perhaps he was. Thankfully it was starting to sound convincing to her ears. She rarely blamed him all these years; she spent all of those years blaming herself. It was easy to blame herself because she loved him too much, creating excuses came in a very easy manner and she hated the way it was easy for her. When they were married, he made sure she didn’t think he was doing her a favor by being with her. She was nothing but a poor girl that he fell in love with. He didn’t care about what the tabloid thought of them together or what the whole world felt about their union.
He was perfect, and he could have any girl he wanted, yet he chose to spend forever with her. She never knew what went wrong to date, but the least she could have done was try to fight for him. Instead, she shut down and switched to alcohol. She still ended up ruining herself and almost losing her life. She almost took her own life with drinking, and she remembered she had no one with her during those days. It was like her own darkest hour with nobody to share it with, at least the person who promised never to leave her side did leave. Nicholas had stared at her at the aisle and he promised her that he would never go back on his promise. Their wedding was magical and she could have sworn that it would never end. She ran her hands through her face, and she felt at peace. At least the fire didn’t ruin her life. When Nicholas divorced her, she felt like her life would be on hold; she wanted nothing but to die. Then the fire happened one night after she passed out from excessive drinking. She didn’t know how she got rescued, but she knew when she woke up, She was too broken to stare into the mirror. When her alimony came, she didn’t have enough balls to reject it because she would be left to fend alone. A trip out of the country and a facial reconstruction surgery was what it took to restart her life afresh. Moving on wasn’t that easy, and every time she was healing, she always found something to push her down that dark lane. However, the memories she shared with Nicholas would always remain with her. She would never forget their first meeting. She was just a young woman, fresh out of college, and she needed a job. She had no one to help, and student loans were driving her crazy. They had met at a party that she was ushering at, it was an elite party, and she would be earning thrice her usual pay for serving drinks at the party. She jumped at the offer and wore her best outfit; she was tired and worn out by the end of the party. She wanted to do nothing but return to the apartment she shared with Julie, her college roommate, and sleep away from her fatigue. She was sitting by the trunk of the car, and she was almost dozing off while waiting for the cleaning services to do their job. They would leave the venue together, and it would take a whole hour to get back to her apartment. She needed to sleep well enough so she won’t feel sleepy on her next shift. Someone approached her and handed her a black silk card, asking her to call the person. The card looked rich, and Astra knew she was about to make it out of the slums. Her head came up with different scenarios on what the man could want, and everything led back to sex. One night with the man would barely hurt anyone. When they were leaving the venue, she could swear that she felt someone eating her up with his eyes from a nearby limo, but she ignored it. When she got home, she shared the information with Julie, who egged her on and advised her to put a call through to him. When she first called, part of what made her fall in love with him more was his voice. She could remember vividly when he picked the call. He sounded so confident and sexy that her pants pooled at the voice. “I’ve been expecting your call,” He replied before she even had the chance to introduce herself. Her head spun in different directions, and she was a blubbering mess. She couldn’t form a coherent sentence, and she remembered the way he chuckled at her poor attempt at replying to him. “How about we do this, I pick you up tomorrow for lunch, and we talk over food?” He asked softly, and she nodded her head. She had forgotten that he couldn’t see her. He said something else before hanging up, and Astra slid down the wall. This would change her life; she could feel it in her bones. Indeed, it changed her life. Firstly, it brought her good tidings, it upgraded her life and he made her feel like a queen for some time before it shattered her the same way it had elevated her. The backslide was faster because this time, she didn’t have anyone to hold on to or to help him stay sane. He had picked her up himself that afternoon, and she spent hours trying to look simple without giving away the fact that she put all her efforts into this with Julie’s help. That afternoon, he blew her mind away. She drank in his appearance, and she knew she was sold. He had all the muscles in the appropriate place, and his smell was heavenly. Astra couldn’t decipher the strong cologne reeked of hardwood and something sweet. He smelled manly and sweet at the same time. “You must be Astra. You look way better when you’re near, and I must admit, you look just celestial as your name”. That was the first thing he said to her in his deep baritone voice. Moments after she got into the car with him, the voice was still going off on repeat in her head. The way Astra rolled off his tongue made her feel more beautiful; no, it made her feel more queenly. She loved the feeling. She had no idea where they were going, but her guts trusted him. That turned out to be the best first date she has ever been on. They went on a couple more dates before he took her on vacation. This vacation sealed their relationship, and it made them official. Before the vacation, he made her move out from the apartment she shared with Julie, and he got her an expensive apartment around the rich people’s vicinity, as she and Julie would call it. He got her a job at his friend’s company, and he would drop by too frequently just to see her face. They had a beautiful thing going on, and almost everyone could see it. Their first night was memorable together, and he made her feel like a queen. It wasn’t her first because she has had a couple of boyfriends in college, but it was her most enjoyable one. Sex with Nicholas was something she always looked forward to because there’s never a dull moment with him. He would always try out new styles and new positions. He adored consent, and he would always make you the center of the show. The first time he ate her out was on the beach; it was a private beach, but few people were around. She was lying flat on the mat enjoying the breeze, and he suddenly brought his mat behind hers. He lay on his mat, bringing his head to her lap. She didn’t know he had anything to do, so she thought he was being clingy as usual. He parted her robe slowly before trailing his hands over her laps. She got an idea of what he wanted to do. She tried to move him off, but he wasn’t budging. “If you scream, They will escort us out of here, and we won’t be allowed in here anymore. Plus, we will be doing a walk of shame back to our suite; I’m not sure you would like that. So the ball is in your court” He chuckled darkly, and Astra felt hot at the threat. She was a screamer and squirter; keeping her voice low would be a great challenge, but she was willing to try. Her phone rang, drawing her attention away from her thoughts, and she slid the hand over the screen to pick up the call. It was her supervisor at work, and she groaned mentally. Her vacation isn’t supposed to be over yet, even though she never left her room all through the break. It seems there’s an important job waiting for her approval. “Good morning Mr, Woltman, How are you doing this morning?” She greeted, and the older man replied with enthusiasm. The man had always treated her like his own daughter. Even when she didn’t want to practice law anymore, he reminded her why she studied it in the first place. Whenever she lost a case, he was always there to cheer her on. When she came back from her forced sabbatical and she needed a new job. Mr. Woltman had been there for her and he made her feel better just by smiling at her. He was her family in the firm, even though she didn’t tell him that. “Good morning Astra, sorry to disturb your vacation but we have a significant case on our hands and the client specially requested for you. I think the world won’t forget how you helped that little girl get justice. He’s willing to pay extra for the troubles of cutting your vacation short. GHe would love to meet you personally tomorrow. Sounds like a solid deal to me,” Mr. Woltman said, and Astra sighed. As if she knew that she had a critical case on her hands. She was having mixed feelings about this client who had requested for her personally. She just wanted to heal but if she was being honest with herself, it would take her more than a vacation to heal. Maybe she should go back into the love market and she would have a few flings without strings that might help her take away the hurt. He called her a whore, maybe it was high time she started acting like one. Good girls don’t get rewarded, bad girls snatch their own rewards. “Alright, please forward the details to my email; let me round up things on my end here before the meeting tomorrow,” She replied before getting up from the bed and returning the divorce papers to the last drawer of her shelf. She was about to leave her room when Mr. Woltman’s following words stopped her. Never in a million years had she expected that to come from him or anyone, she thought she was finally free from it. “Mr. Nicholas Michealson would be happy to hear that you’ve accepted his demands.” The man said without any idea what his words were doing to Astra. She was shocked, and the alarms went off in her head. Her ex-husband was her new client. She had a whole lot of questions but her boss already hung up, she wanted to ask him plenty of things. The fact that Nicholas was making his way back to her life was something that didn’t sit well with her. She had worked for months trying to start afresh and be her own person but here he was trying to ruin everything she had worked hard to keep.Nicholas sat in the conference room along with two of his legal advisers, and they waited for his ex-wife to show up. He had explicitly requested her because he wanted to see how well she was doing now without him. Part of him felt guilty for how he didn’t give her a chance to explain herself. Instead, he tossed her out just like everyone in her life had. He was hurt too; for the first time he let someone into his heart, she ruined it for him. He hasn’t had a decent relationship since then. He hated how she made him feel vulnerable in a way that no other person had made him feel, it was like she allowed him to love her before she shattered him into tiny bits that would forever haunt him. His love life was a mess after their divorce and he would not be able to look at another woman the same way he looked at her. He has given a few relationships trials and she needed ruining them for him without her having to try at all.He once moaned her name during se
Astra walked into her apartment, and she made sure she locked the door before she dropped her bag on the floor and she slid down the wall. All these years of thinking about her reunion with Nicholas, never in one had she imagined him to hate her that much. She could see the hatred in his eyes as he called her a whore. Five years didn’t heal her heart and the same five years wasn’t enough to make her stop hating him. The most painful part of these processes was that he never told her what happened. He threw her out in the rain, called her names, and banged the door in her face. She felt betrayed because this man had promised to love her forever., promise to cherish her forever, and yet in one day, he turned her out and threw her to the wolves.She sobbed quietly, and she covered her mouth. She willed herself to cry because she had been holding on to her tears for so long. No matter what she did, she hated the way simple name-calling from him could send
Astra didn’t know which one excited her more, the fact that she was going to visit an art showcase with Dylan or that she just woke up on the good side of the bed naturally. She had always felt heavy each time she woke up, but today was better. Surprisingly, she had a weird dream about Nicholas coming to her home. Ewww! Nicholas would never come not with all that hate in his eyes. She was even scared of it herself. She said Hello to every co-worker she met on the road, and she couldn’t help but notice the stares they gave her. Like something happened, and she wasn’t in the loop. She shrugged and blamed it on the fact that she looked fantastic today. Her big smile was doing a good job complementing that.One thing that g stopped her from moving forward was how people hung around her cubicle while staring at it; they were not just staring. They were talking too. She had no idea what they were talking about, but one way to find out was moving closer
Astra grabbed the cup of coffee the waiter had just placed beside her on the table and sipped it gently after stirring it with the spoon beside. "You still don't like sugar? " Stephanie asked her while placing some cubes into her own cup. Astra smiled and said nothing to Stephanie. "Uhmm! this apple pie always tastes like heaven. " Stephanie declared while devouring the apple pie. "The delicacies here are meant for our taste buds, my dear friend. " Astra replied. Stephanie nodded in approval. "I needed this breakfast more than I needed anything. I missed it," said Stephanie. "It was always cheese, fish, and some dumb veggies for breakfast throughout our honeymoon. I couldn't complain but kept eating the whole damn thing. " Stephanie confessed with disgust while shaking her head. Astra smiled at her and said, "You didn't tell me how it went." Steph chuckled and replied. "You sure don't need every detail of my honeymoon. "Girl I need all the detail I can get. " Astra retorted with a
As soon as Nicholas left the room, Astra let out a sigh of relief. She was not sure how much more of the interaction she could take. It was a because of her stupid boss, that was the only reason she had to been deal with all of this. She felt a rumbling in her stomach, reminding her that it was lunch time. Astra had to get something to eat, and quickly. The breakfast she had with Stephanie that morning looked like it was not going to be enough to sustain her. Maybe she could just come in later to work on her project. As she pondered on this idea for a moment, the sound of her ringing phone cut through the air. Astra picked it up for the table and glanced at the screen. “Jared,” she noted with a sigh. Her mind took her back to Jared and Nicholas' reaction. It hadn't ended well, and with the mood that Nicholas was in already, there was no telling what he would do if he found out who was calling. Astra's shoulders slumped a little, as she leaned against the table, to ease some of the
Astra quickly turned the direction of the car to Nicholas’ home the home that was once hers. Not the time to think of that Astra, she scolds herself.“This had better be some serious emergency” She mutters. With the speed at which she was going, she’d definitely get pulled over. Luckily for her, there were no police around. Astra prayed in her heart that Nicholas was okay, she shouldn’t care, she should have been doing quite the opposite. But deep down she knew no matter what, she’d always care for Nicholas. His voice over the phone sounded hurried, frightened even and before she knew it she had sprinted out of the coffee shop without giving any explanation whatsoever to Jared. What was she to say? “Sorry Jared, Nicholas needs me. You know Nicholas don’t you? Yes, the same man you met in my home a week back that harassed you. Also, my ex-husband that threw me out into the rain five years ago, ah yes that’s the one” Jared would have looked at her as a stupid woman and in all honesty,
Nicholas felt utterly and completely dejected and most importantly a fool, a very big one at that. How could he let his guard so lose and let the pure lust he felt towards Astra control his actions. That was the thing he never liked when it came to Astra, how she was in total control of his feelings without evening trying. He could do the most stupidest things and shitties things when it came to her. What the fuck was he thinking trying to coo her into his bed.“God I am such a fool” he muttered to himself, hands folded behind his neck as he looked at the plain wall as though it was supposed to miraculously reply his question.The cold wind blew as the trees swung from left to right. Everywhere was calm and the lights were off. The creepy darkness haunted the streets and not a soul could be seen hovering around perhaps some living souls that meant business could be seen. In his large black coat with a muffler around his neck, he stood by the end of the road as he adjusted his big hat
The 18th of July. A date Astra never thought she could forget in a hurry. About twelve years ago on that day, she tried Sam's line but it wasn't going through so she went to his home instead to ensure everything was fine. Sam always picked her calls unlike that day. The door to Sam's living room opened the moment she gave the door a slight push. His parents were probably out and Jean his younger sister was playing with her friends at the park behind. She dashed to Sam's room and hit the door with so much frustration after the moanings she heard made her run mad with rage. Sam her highschool boyfriend was on top of Clara some random girl from her class as Sam asserts. Clara was butt naked while Sam had his boxers on. After she hurried home in tears, she imagined Clara bending over Sam's abdomen giving him a blow job while he screamed in pleasure as she heard him say to Clara "You handle me so well." She was heartbroken. The tortuous scene she encountered back then made her vow never
Chapter 66"You are not to call me for anything. Anything at all, I mean it, I deserve this vacation. I have not been on one in years. My flight is leaving in a few hours and I just wanted to brief you, so please don't call me, thank you," Astra said to her assistant. She had opened her law firm, after she got married, finally achieving her dreams. She hoped that the company would not crumble since she was leaving for two weeks."What if it is really really important, like the building is on fire?" Tricia her assistant asked. Astra knew that she was just trying to rile her up. There were not just boss and employee, they had become friends over the years."I am not a firefighter am I? It's not like I can put off the fire I was there. So don't call me. It is just two weeks, you will be fine. I am not even taking my phone, it will just be, nature and my hot husband so please, thank you. If you need anything ask Jared, he will he willing to help," Astra told Tiana and she disconnected the
Chapter 65Astra felt giddy, free, and light. She was a bit nervous too, because what bride was not nervous on her wedding day? It did not matter that she had gotten married before and to the same man at that, it also did not matter that she had two children for the said man, she was entitled to pre-wedding jitters and she was having them.Astra's first wedding was in Vegas, she was half drunk and so was Nicholas. They were drunk on both wine and love and they enjoyed each other. Astra could not remember the exact details of her first wedding since she was wasted and all, but it did not waste much time and she was done with it, she did not have enough time to be nervous or to back out of the wedding, that was it. Unlike this time that there was an entire plan, rehearsals, shopping, and too much money involved."Relax Astra, you are too tense. Nicholas loves you and wants to marry you, everything will be alright," Charise said to her as she held her hand. Astra sighed."I know that he
"Congratulations Astra," her sister said as she entered into the room. Her mother and father were not far behind. Astra smiled as her family came in. She was happy that her sister was there for her, that she was willing to be there for her. Astra was grateful that she was able to fix things with her family."She looks very beautiful, she looks more like Nicholas though, maybe she might grow to look like you," Charise said as she studied the baby."Would you like to hold her?" Astra asked looking at her sister. She was looking at the baby in awe."Oh of course. It has really been so long since I saw a new born baby, it never does get old," Charise said and Astra stretched the baby to her carefully. Her sister extracted the child from her hands and held on the baby. She looked like she was in love."Maybe I will have another child after all," Charise said softly. "She does look so precious. You did very well Astra," her mother said to her. Things were not so rosy after everything that
Chapter 63Astra felt a dull pain on her lower stomach and then felt it go a little lower. They started earlier that day but she figured they were Braxton Hicks and then her water broke, she began to panic. Nicholas was out of town. He had neglected his business for almost too long and it was telling on him. The stress was getting to him. He did not want to have to have her but she all but pushed him out of her house to go make some money so that the children could feed or something like that. Astra remembered that he was unwilling to leave, but he left at the end because he had to."Brian please bring my phone," Astra said to her son. She was trying to study the contractions, they were coming faster. She did not know who to call. Stephanie had her own baby just three months back, Yvonne was far away, Sarah and Jared were out of town with Theo. Charise, she was the only one she could call."Mommy are you okay?" Her son asked as he brought the phone to her with steady hands. Another wa
Chapter 62"We are going to the zoo!" Brian shouted at breakfast when Astra told him."Thank you Mommy!" Brian said again and Astra smiled."So just eat up your breakfast, your daddy is coming to take us there," Astra told her son who looked so excited by the fact that her husband was going to take them out. Brian nodded at his mother's words.It was their first family outing. After visiting Brianna's grave, Nicholas said that he wanted to spend as much time as possible with his family, she could not blame him at all. She just lost Brianna so she could feel a fraction of what he felt since he never met her and he missed the first four years of Brian's life. After their dinner date, they had a few more dates together. They had gone to an art museum and looked at art together. They both went around together and looked at art all the while discussing various things. It felt like they were getting to know each other again. She told him about her dreams and he told her about his. She told
Chapter 61Nicholas was about to look at the picture when Astra's lips met with his. He felt the sparks when their lips touched. It had been so long they had been together without the aid of alcohol and external influences. It felt wonderful. Nicholas helped Astra to climb him and he kissed her deeper, he slightly tugged on her bottom lip with his teeth while she snuck her tongue past his lips. It felt wonderful for a while as they had a duel of tongues of sorts. They both explored each other with their mouth and their hands. Nicholas' hands went over Astra's body, her hands over his. He felt so hot and hard and all hers.Nicholas flipped her so that she was below him and helped her out of her dress. He wanted some skin and he wanted it fast. He touched her with an urgency of a cave man and he did the same to her."It has been so long," Nicholas said as he removed her dress. She looked so white and beautiful and refreshing. Nicholas had to remind himself to be careful when he saw her
Chapter 60"I will put these in some water," Astra said and went into her kitchen to find a vase for the flowers. She then put them in some water."We should get going," Astra said when she was done. She was not sure that she could stay in the house with him for much longer without trying to kiss him or doing something equally as odd."I have a gift for you," Nicholas said and then brought out a little velvet box from his pocket. Astra opened her eyes and gazed at the box as Nicholas opened it. It was a necklace. It was silver and had a tear drop of diamond as a a a a a a a a a a locket. It was simple but yet it was very beautiful."Oh my God Nicholas, it is beautiful," Astra said as she gazed at the necklace."Turn around," Nicholas said to Astra and she did. She held her breath as he placed the necklace over her neck. The closeness between them seemed to increase as she felt p breath at her neck. Astra could feel the electricity between the two of them. The years and the betrayal b
Chapter 59Astra woke up the next morning in a very excited mood. She felt like she was in a very good mood. She wanted the date to go very well without any hitches. She took her bath and started to get ready for the shopping spree. She was already having breakfast when Stephanie called her."Hello Stephanie," Astra said when she picked up the call."Hello, Astra. Are you ready to start going shopping now?" Stephanie asked her and Astra laughed. To think that she thought her friend would not have the strength to go shopping since she was pregnant."You are more eager for this dress than I am Stephanie," Astra said with a laugh. It was a little funny how she could be."Whatever you say Astra, I just want to get clothes, that is all," Steph said and Astra laughed."I will be ready in an hour, " Astra said to her friend before she disconnected the call.After the call, Astra looked at her phone and she saw a text from Nicholas. It was as cheesy as the first one, but the thing was that sh
Chapter 58"We should do this. We can start by being friends. We can forget that everything happened and pretend that we just met," Nicholas said and Astra laughed a bit."We have a child together, and in four months, we would have another one. That is not a very good plan," Astra said with a smile."Says who?" Nicholas said. He looked so cheeky. It reminded Astra of how she found him so funny when they had first met and that was one of the reasons she fell in love with him."Oh, good evening. I just saw you walking by and I was in awe, such a beautiful lady, I said to myself that I had to meet you. My name is Nicholas, and you are," Nicholas said to Astra, he took her hand in his and kissed her fingers. Astra felt like butterflies were erupting in her stomach like the first day they had met. She felt like he was so handsome then, just like when they had met, a little more than seven years back."My name is Astra, I love your smile," Astra said. She did love the way he smiled. She rem