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9: So Many Soul Crushing Truths And Gut Wrenching Pains
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2024-10-29 19:42:56Related chapters
Of Teeth and Claws 10: What A Little Music And A Head Full Of Delusion Can Do
(Song: Harder To Breathe by Letdown) I take the backseat so I can sit with the box. The box that has my mother’s things in it. No matter how badly I want to flip open the lid, I can’t get my fingers to move. I can feel Lyra’s eyes on me in the rearview mirror. “What’s that?” She asks. Talking about it has my throat constricting once again. “Just some of my mom’s things.” Peeling my hand off of it, I try to forget about it. “I’ll look at it later.” Zoning out the rest of the ride, my mind becomes fixated on that dreadful box. What’s inside it? It has my heart racing for conflicting reasons. Good and bad. Terrifying and comforting. I don’t let myself think about my mother very often, because it hurts too much. The ache of missing her is still debilitating. Another buzz of my phone has me jolting in the backseat. Finally, I skip past the three missed calls to scroll through all the texts. Call me. Please call me Nova. Where did you hear that name? Nova. Call me. Now. The car comes
Of Teeth and Claws 11: Who Told You That Name
(Song: Enemy by The Plot In You) No one follows me, which leaves me with conflicting feelings. The tug of war battle is a roller coaster of emotions and thoughts. The breaks are broken and the seatbelt is too tight. Each incline and every turn, I’m whipped around like a ragdoll. All for one boy that I swear I’ve just met. Stepping outside doesn’t clear my head as well as it’s supposed to. The back patio area is mainly for smokers among other things. A few illegal transactions are the least of my worries though. With no eye contact, no inkling of wanting to have a conversation with anyone, I find a corner that’s the least occupied. It takes longer than it should to pull out my phone and dial my dad. Jittery fingers and a growing headache impair my motor skills. The phone barely rings once, before a frantic voice screams from the speaker. “Nova.” There’s no pause for an answer as he keeps shouting at me. “Nova, do you have any idea what time it is? Why haven’t you answered my calls o
Of Teeth and Claws 12: But This Bet Is Between Nox And I
The look on Lyra’s face as she jumps to her feet once we arrive has my stomach churning. What did she do now? “Ready?” The smile on her face is too eager. “I may have made a bet with the boys while you were gone.” “What did you bet?” Please let it be something mediocre. There’s no surprise that she isn’t that forthcoming. “If the guys win, they want us to join them for a house party.” A house party? “They actually live in town. What are the odds?” Yeah. What are the odds? Nox and the twins are townies. Fuck. My father’s right. Nox is aware of my past. And he might be in cahoots with Gideon. My voice is shaky as I ask, “and if we win.” Through twisted lips and a scrunched face, she admits, “they visit us in Cromwell.” Well there goes throwing the game. There’s no way in hell I can let them win. Going to their house. I can weasel my way out of them coming to Cromwell. But I know Lyra and once she has a boy in view it’s impossible to get her to let go. “I think Nox and I should have
Of Teeth and Claws 13: It's More Than Awful. It's Heartbreaking
(Song: Right Left Wrong by Three Days Grace) I wake up in my hotel bed partially oblivious to getting here. I fell asleep in the car and Lyra had tugged me awake. In a daze, I trekked up to the second floor or did Lyra walk with me? Either way I made it here, changed and crawled into bed. I can't complain. It was a nightmare free night but I swear I had a dream about Nox. But like most dreams the details disappear upon waking up. I might not remember what it was about but it leaves an anxiousness that settles heavily on my chest. Pushing it aside, I roll out of bed. My head is feeling better but still groggy with sleep. The first thing my eyes land on after stretching my limbs awake is the box. Was I carrying it? Maybe Lyra did walk with me back and she carried it. My eyes scan the room for my phone. A panic engulfs me. I tear the bed apart, look at the nightstand and desk once more, check the bathroom, even my clothes that I had been wearing last night. It's nowhere. And then it
Of Teeth and Claws 14: It's As If You Knew I Was Coming
(Song: Fire Up The Night by New Medicine) Our ride back to the hotel is fairly quick, which I’m grateful for. An icy numbness chills my bones and it’s not from the mild weather of Fairbanks. I can’t stop thinking about who I saw at the cemetery. It could’ve been just a random person visiting their dead loved one, but where did they go. They just disappeared like they didn’t want to be caught. If it was Nox, he wouldn’t run and hide. He would make himself very known. It still could be Wes. Stepping into the lobby of the hotel, Lyra turns on me, “Dinner, tonight. Here?” She tosses her thumb in the direction of the restaurant attached to the hotel. “Say in a couple hours?” With all of us in agreement, we break off to our rooms. Lyra and Eden turn left down one of the main floor halls as I go right to hop on the elevator. It takes forever to open up and with so many people hustling around. But I wait it out because I refuse to take the stairs. I’ve been able to ignore the stranger with
Of Teeth and Claws 15: The A**hole Bit Me
The restaurant in the hotel isn’t too fancy and not overly busy either. That doesn’t help settle my nerves or my stomach. My thighs still burn from Nox’s roughness. I don't know where my head was at. I just let him manhandle me. My mind races as we sit down and order. Thankfully, Lyra’s too busy texting someone that I hope isn’t Stryker. But Eden is very observant. “Are you okay? You seem a little off?” You could say that. “Is it about visiting your mom today?” Immediately, I’m filled with shame. I visited my mother’s grave for the first time and not even a couple hours later, I’m doing despicable things with a stranger. What the fuck is wrong with me? “It's just a lot being back here.” Which is true. It’s like I’m turning into a whole different person being here. “Maybe you should stay, you know, longer than a week.” Lyra doesn’t know how terrifying her words are. “I know there’s a lot of heartbreak here, but maybe you can come to terms with it. Maybe it’ll help you move on witho
Of Teeth and Claws 16: Secrets. Answers. Lies.
(Song: Anymore by Lo Spirit) The guilt that consumes shifts as my eyes go from the floor to the dresser and land on the box my grandma gave me and find the lid open. Did he look at whatever is inside? Pushing past my own terror, I grab the box horrified and eager to see what's inside. To see what Nox possibly saw. Deep breath in, holding it in my lungs, I look inside. At first glance the box is filled with pictures and letters. On top of the stack is a picture. It's face down, the back of it has curvy handwriting stating two names. I nearly choke on my spit as I read it, Elara and Gideon. Elara is my mother’s name and Gideon…I still have no clue who he is, but this proves that he does in face know my mother. My dad could be right. Gideon could be the wolf that was after my mother. Flipping the picture over, I stare at my mother, much younger than my memories can give me, standing next to this Gideon. It’s nice putting a face to the name, but the face is unfamiliar and it doesn’t
Of Teeth and Claws 17: It Tells Others You're Mine
Walking out of the hotel is a blur. All I know is that Eden takes the backseat as usual and I get a clear view of where we’re going up front. We leave the city to enter the suburbs. Whose house are we going to? The whole situation keeps getting worse. With one turn the empty streets are suddenly filled with parked cars. My question of what kind of party this is, is answered. It’s definitely a frat type party. Finally finding a spot to park, Lyra has the biggest smile on her face all while I could throw up on her floor mats. She’s the first to hop out followed by Eden. Then the two of them coerce me out of the car. Smashed between the two of them, they guide me to the house that has music streaming out its open windows and people lingering in the yard. My nerves get the best of me. My legs get shaky and my breathing becomes shallow. I can’t decipher if it’s in anticipation of seeing Nox or something else. Something else. Definitely something else. Something with teeth and claws. Ma
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Of Teeth and Claws 52: Prologue
Nexus and I leave the pack house for the city. With appointments for manicures and a hair appointment, I start to relax. Nexus’s smile is contagious. Her happiness is infectious. I don’t know what she sees in Silas or if there was a choice in the matter when it comes to werewolf mates. With happiness comes sadness though. It was saying goodbye to Levi. Telling him that I was moving back to Fairbanks crushed him. It crushed me, but it had to be done. I’ve missed so much already. Tariq and Cato took so much away from me and Levi knew he couldn’t do the same. From the minute I stepped foot here everything was slowly putting itself back together. I found my family and I couldn’t be more grateful. And being maid of honor for Nexus feels right. It feels normal. After our nails are done and our hair is styled, we head back to the pack house. Only Gideon and a few random pack members are there. The twins and Nox are at Nexus and Silas’s house in wait for the wedding to start. Gideon greets
Of Teeth and Claws 51: To Feel His Hands On Me. To Have His Mouth Devour Me.
I can ignore the heavy rustling and the mutter of words, but the slam of the door startles me awake. Crawling out of bed, shuffling across the room, rubbing my eyes to clear my sleepy vision away, I spot Nox in the living room.A smile spreads across my face and my heart beats out of my chest. The relief in seeing him has me lightheaded. He hasn’t noticed me yet and I’m struck dumbfounded, unable to speak. I’m frozen in place watching him.He’s clearly drunk as he sways on his feet while struggling with taking his t-shirt off. Frustrated at his lack of coordination, he bickers with himself. Giving up, he drops down onto the couch, kicking up his feet.“Nox,” I quietly say into the room, finally finding my voice. He doesn’t answer. Did he fall asleep? Creeping further out of the bedroom, I approach the couch, “Nox,” I repeat a little louder this time.A deep groan fills the room. It’s hard to tell if it's from annoyance or rage. “Jesus, Nexus. I knew I should’ve took your fucking key a
Of Teeth and Claws 50: Where Is He?
The faint echo of my name piques my attention, but not enough to get my eyes to open. They call for me. Over and over again, but I remain immobile, drifting further and further into sleepiness. I can feel the stomping of feet race against the floorboards. They step right next to me, but I can’t get my eyes open to look at them.It could be Twyla coming to get revenge. It could be Cato coming to finish the job. “Nova. Nova, how-” A pair of arms latch onto me. They’re not clawing at me, but they do tug and prod. “I got you, baby. I got you.”Scooped off the ground, my aches and pains have my breath hitching. He shushes me as he gathers me in his arms and retreats from the room. “Gideon,” I mutter. “I’m not dead,” I mumble.A chuckle sounds under his breath and rumbles within his chest. “No, you’re not,” he agrees as he lays me in the backseat of a car. “I need you to try to stay awake, okay.” His plea is said on a shaky breath. Am I in that bad of shape? Am I scaring him?All I can mus
Of Teeth and Claws 49: I Shuffle Inside To Find The Eye Of The Storm
Driving up on the house, my stomach turns to knots. It’s in the early morning hours and I have no idea if she’s sleeping inside or if the house is empty. Exhaustion has my mind racing and my heart fluttering. All the different possible outcomes have me dizzy. Sitting in the car, I begin to rethink my plan. Why am I here? Searching for family. For a place to belong. To fill the emptiness of losing a part of myself. A part that was taken away from me. A part I’m stupidly desperate to take back. Staring at the house, I heave in a few breaths before finally gathering enough courage to exit the car. With slow cautious steps, I approach the house thinking about what I’m going to say. Whether or not I should ring the doorbell or knock or maybe just turn around and go somewhere else. But before I can decide, I notice the door is cracked open. Panic overtakes logic. Not a single thought or reason stops me from entering the house and calling out for her. Even in the darkness that shrouds the
Of Teeth and Claws 48:But If I Belong To Any Pack, To Any Wolf, It Would Be To Gideon and Nox.
“I want to go home?” I whine.“You can barely stand,” Wes argues back.“That’s not true.” I can stand, but it’s as if he doesn’t want me to. He’s been crowding me. Hovering. He’s lying to my face and boxing me. “I just want to be in my own bed…” my words die off as my gaze flickers to Levi.I might keep the rest of my words to myself, but Levi knows. What I want most is to get away from wolves. But they’re everywhere. Wes is always here and every time the door opens when he or Levi come and go, there are always wolves in the halls.Levi tries to give me peace of mind, “I’ll speak to the doctor. I don’t see it being a problem.” His words are cautious and almost forced. He’s told me that more times than I can count in the last two days. Does he know something I don’t? Am I not allowed to leave?“Why do we need to ask permission? It’s like I’m being held captive.” The frustration that boils within me tries to explode. It has me jumping to my feet, which I immediately regret. The stitches
Of Teeth and Claws 47: Please Tell Me It Isn't Werewolf Blood
I’m not sure what wakes me from sleep, but the more awake I become, the more aches and pains I endure. Eyes barely open, I struggle to sit up. “Ugh, that hurts.” The reason why it hurts slips my mind for a fraction of a second. Cato stabbed me.“Damn it, Nova. You’re gonna bust your stitches.” The familiar voice startles me as he comes from out of nowhere.“Wes? Where am I?” The room is unfamiliar, but Wes seems at ease. This has to be his pack house. “Where’s Gideon and Nox?” I left in the middle of a full out brawl. I need to know what happened. Desperate, I swing my legs out of bed only to have Wes push me back down.“You’re safe. That’s all that matters.” He grabs a chair that was at the foot of the bed, sliding it closer. Was he sitting there all along?No matter what Wes wants to believe, my safety isn’t all that matters. “That’s what I asked.” When he doesn’t reply, I force a response from him, “where are they?” Is his silence because he doesn’t know or because he doesn’t want
Of Teeth and Claws 46: It's Fate
Paranoia has me blacking out. Not literally. If only I would pass out. It feels as if I should, but I remain awake and aware of what’s bound to happen. However, I’m not aware of the motions it takes to get there. One minute I’m in the car and the next I’m walking down a trail with Cato right beside me, knife poking into my back. Our final destination, a small gazebo, was already picked out way before our arrival as we’re met with five wolves that seem to step out of the shadows. The perfect vantage point for Cato. Place the bait in the middle and easily surround it from every corner. “You’re gonna sit here,” he pushes me aggressively down onto the bench that runs along the inside of the structure, “try to make yourself look…fragile. You can do that, can’t you?” I don’t answer, so he bends down making sure our eyes meet. “Do I have to make you look fragile? Rough you up a little bit. It’ll make for a good show.” A malicious smile spreads his lips apart. I don’t have to answer before
Of Teeth and Claws 45: Fucking Brat
Standing in the entryway, staring at Twyla, has my entire body on edge. All it takes is a twitch of my legs as if I’m about to make a mad dash for her to tackle me. What next is a confrontation I’m not ready for. “Walk. Dad’s waiting.” My feet don’t move, but when I feel the edge of a weapon dig into my back, I’m forced to comply. She leads me straight to Levi who’s tied to a chair with Cato right behind him, blade to his throat. There’s already a cut across his cheek, blood dripping from his chin. Levi’s cry of my name is cut off as the sharp edge digs in a little deeper. "Nova,” Cato says clearly disappointed, “did you think you could hide from me? Running away was a mistake, but you have a chance to fix it." Sure I can. Cato’s mind is already made up. Someone is going to die tonight. "When you left, I had to make adjustments, settle so to say." "Excuse me?" Twyla snaps. "Settle? You’re not referring to settling…for me, are you?" Wait? What? Cato and Twyla? “Because this means
Of Teeth and Claws 44: Constantly Crashing Into Each Other
I refuse to acknowledge the new day. My second day home. It still feels wrong for some reason. There’s a tension that strains my muscles that I can’t quite shake. It’s like I’m a sitting duck waiting for something to happen. Waiting to hear awful news. Levi tries to talk to me, but I can’t seem to hear his words. I’m tired and sore and more than anything I want the thoughts to stop. The guilt and heartbreak. The disappointment that someone I care about will feel when I’m forced to choose which life I want. It’s only when my stomach grumbles that I realize I’ve been sitting here for most of the day. The sun is starting to set and I have still yet to reach out to Lyra and Eden. Not wanting to use Levi’s phone, I open my laptop and message Lyra through her favorite social media site. I’m back! Lost my phone. Coming over. I wait for her reply which doesn’t take long. She wants me to meet her and Eden at The Black Plum. Carelessly, I throw on some halfway fancy clothes as the restauran
