The restaurant in the hotel isn’t too fancy and not overly busy either. That doesn’t help settle my nerves or my stomach. My thighs still burn from Nox’s roughness. I don't know where my head was at. I just let him manhandle me. My mind races as we sit down and order. Thankfully, Lyra’s too busy texting someone that I hope isn’t Stryker. But Eden is very observant. “Are you okay? You seem a little off?” You could say that. “Is it about visiting your mom today?” Immediately, I’m filled with shame. I visited my mother’s grave for the first time and not even a couple hours later, I’m doing despicable things with a stranger. What the fuck is wrong with me? “It's just a lot being back here.” Which is true. It’s like I’m turning into a whole different person being here. “Maybe you should stay, you know, longer than a week.” Lyra doesn’t know how terrifying her words are. “I know there’s a lot of heartbreak here, but maybe you can come to terms with it. Maybe it’ll help you move on witho
(Song: Anymore by Lo Spirit) The guilt that consumes shifts as my eyes go from the floor to the dresser and land on the box my grandma gave me and find the lid open. Did he look at whatever is inside? Pushing past my own terror, I grab the box horrified and eager to see what's inside. To see what Nox possibly saw. Deep breath in, holding it in my lungs, I look inside. At first glance the box is filled with pictures and letters. On top of the stack is a picture. It's face down, the back of it has curvy handwriting stating two names. I nearly choke on my spit as I read it, Elara and Gideon. Elara is my mother’s name and Gideon…I still have no clue who he is, but this proves that he does in face know my mother. My dad could be right. Gideon could be the wolf that was after my mother. Flipping the picture over, I stare at my mother, much younger than my memories can give me, standing next to this Gideon. It’s nice putting a face to the name, but the face is unfamiliar and it doesn’t
Walking out of the hotel is a blur. All I know is that Eden takes the backseat as usual and I get a clear view of where we’re going up front. We leave the city to enter the suburbs. Whose house are we going to? The whole situation keeps getting worse. With one turn the empty streets are suddenly filled with parked cars. My question of what kind of party this is, is answered. It’s definitely a frat type party. Finally finding a spot to park, Lyra has the biggest smile on her face all while I could throw up on her floor mats. She’s the first to hop out followed by Eden. Then the two of them coerce me out of the car. Smashed between the two of them, they guide me to the house that has music streaming out its open windows and people lingering in the yard. My nerves get the best of me. My legs get shaky and my breathing becomes shallow. I can’t decipher if it’s in anticipation of seeing Nox or something else. Something else. Definitely something else. Something with teeth and claws. Ma
(Song: Werewolf by Motionless In White) Pushing past her, I barge out of the door oblivious to the stares I get. Once outside I don’t stop. I don’t know where I’m going. Lyra and Eden are still inside and I can’t tell them of the fight I had with Nox. A fight that was more personal than anyone one of us can comprehend. He tossed things in my face that I’m completely clueless to. And I don’t know if I can trust him in giving me truthful answers. He's been acting like a dick out of spite. I keep going until my feet hurt, constantly looking over my shoulder. But in my panic, I find myself on unknown streets, blocks away. The music that had been blaring through the open windows of the house is far off in the distance. Suddenly, I’m engulfed with a different kind of fear. Turning around, planning on heading back to the house to find Lyra’s car, I come to a halt. A shadowed figure stands in the middle of the sidewalk. It isn’t Nox. It’s disturbing how I know that. “Wes?” No answer. “We
(Song: You Broke Me First by Out Last Night) The night air is unusually cold and the damp ground seems to penetrate my bare feet. The woods I find myself in block out most of the moonlight, but it doesn’t take much to know where I am. Stumbling around, flinching at the rocks and broken branches that jab at the soles of my feet, I try to navigate my way out. The feel of eyes watching me has me anxious. And clumsy. I nearly fall face first into a clearing. But the clearing isn’t a clearing at all. It’s a grassy ditch. Frantically, I start to climb out, but the wet grass has my bare feet slipping. I’m unable to get the leverage I need. From out of nowhere, in the woods behind me, a deep guttural growl brings my nightmares to life. A wolf, large and vicious, struts out from between the trees. Its fur is muddy brown and its eyes are red like blood. It advances on me. With each slow calculated step forward, I’m barely able to take a step in retreat. I claw at the wall of the ditch, despe
A man rushes into the room. Nox steps aside and that man, that stranger, attacks me by swooping me into his arms. “Oh, thank god.” He pulls me away from him. Gideon looks just like he did in the picture from my mother’s box. “I’m so glad you’re safe.” He rattles off. Kneeling beside the bed, keeping me at an arm’s length away, we look at each other. Past the blue eyes and blonde hair, my gaze gravitates on a scar across his neck. I’ve seen that before. His frantic words shake me from the growing memory, “when I heard that Nox found you wandering around in the woods…where your mother died, I was worried sick. Especially after Cato attacked you.” What? Wandering the woods? No, that was a dream. Right? At a loss for words, all I can do is shake my head. Was it real? Was I really in the ditch being stalked by wolves? Was I sleepwalking? Forcing myself to remember, I try to recall the dream…if it even was a dream. Bits and pieces come back. The differences stick out like a sore thumb. T
Trapped in a werewolf’s house. I assumed this day would come, but I didn’t actually think it would happen. Most paranoia is meaningless. Just your head running amuck. But here I am and there’s no way out. It’s obvious that someone is outside my door. They’d be foolish to leave it unguarded. What I need to do is plot. I need to plan my escape. If I were to make it out of this house, where would I go? Aimlessly wandering the woods, the woods that Nox is very familiar with, isn’t going to help me. I sidestep a small wooden box on the ground, the object that I had to have knocked over when I tried to get out the window the first time. Kicking it aside, refusing to give it any attention, I look out the window. The view doesn’t settle my stomach. If anything it makes it worse. There isn’t anything besides trees, dense thick forest for as far as the eye can see. There’s peaks of small structures poking out between trees off in the distance. It’s unsure if those are neighbors or buildings o
I don’t notice the setting sun or the creak of the door. It’s his voice simply saying my name that startles me. Hopping to my feet, wiping tear streaks from my face, I put my shield back up. “What do you want?” Nox is more considerate than Silas. My aggression leaves him speechless, which is a first. With a single step forward his booted foot crunches a piece of glass. His eyes whip around the room before landing on the broken frame. “Did you do that?” “Maybe.” I don’t why I don’t admit it. It’s pretty obvious that I did it as I’m the only one in the room. “It was an accident.” Kinda. “Someone can clean it up while we attend dinner.” He isn’t mad, but somehow that makes this all so much worse. For some reason I can tolerate anger, but not sympathy. I can match anger with anger, but I can’t seem to let myself feel pity or compassion when I’m being held here against my will. Family or not. Crossing my arm defiantly, I jut my chin out, “I’m not going.” “Yes, you are. It’s not a cho
Nexus and I leave the pack house for the city. With appointments for manicures and a hair appointment, I start to relax. Nexus’s smile is contagious. Her happiness is infectious. I don’t know what she sees in Silas or if there was a choice in the matter when it comes to werewolf mates. With happiness comes sadness though. It was saying goodbye to Levi. Telling him that I was moving back to Fairbanks crushed him. It crushed me, but it had to be done. I’ve missed so much already. Tariq and Cato took so much away from me and Levi knew he couldn’t do the same. From the minute I stepped foot here everything was slowly putting itself back together. I found my family and I couldn’t be more grateful. And being maid of honor for Nexus feels right. It feels normal. After our nails are done and our hair is styled, we head back to the pack house. Only Gideon and a few random pack members are there. The twins and Nox are at Nexus and Silas’s house in wait for the wedding to start. Gideon greets
I can ignore the heavy rustling and the mutter of words, but the slam of the door startles me awake. Crawling out of bed, shuffling across the room, rubbing my eyes to clear my sleepy vision away, I spot Nox in the living room.A smile spreads across my face and my heart beats out of my chest. The relief in seeing him has me lightheaded. He hasn’t noticed me yet and I’m struck dumbfounded, unable to speak. I’m frozen in place watching him.He’s clearly drunk as he sways on his feet while struggling with taking his t-shirt off. Frustrated at his lack of coordination, he bickers with himself. Giving up, he drops down onto the couch, kicking up his feet.“Nox,” I quietly say into the room, finally finding my voice. He doesn’t answer. Did he fall asleep? Creeping further out of the bedroom, I approach the couch, “Nox,” I repeat a little louder this time.A deep groan fills the room. It’s hard to tell if it's from annoyance or rage. “Jesus, Nexus. I knew I should’ve took your fucking key a
The faint echo of my name piques my attention, but not enough to get my eyes to open. They call for me. Over and over again, but I remain immobile, drifting further and further into sleepiness. I can feel the stomping of feet race against the floorboards. They step right next to me, but I can’t get my eyes open to look at them.It could be Twyla coming to get revenge. It could be Cato coming to finish the job. “Nova. Nova, how-” A pair of arms latch onto me. They’re not clawing at me, but they do tug and prod. “I got you, baby. I got you.”Scooped off the ground, my aches and pains have my breath hitching. He shushes me as he gathers me in his arms and retreats from the room. “Gideon,” I mutter. “I’m not dead,” I mumble.A chuckle sounds under his breath and rumbles within his chest. “No, you’re not,” he agrees as he lays me in the backseat of a car. “I need you to try to stay awake, okay.” His plea is said on a shaky breath. Am I in that bad of shape? Am I scaring him?All I can mus
Driving up on the house, my stomach turns to knots. It’s in the early morning hours and I have no idea if she’s sleeping inside or if the house is empty. Exhaustion has my mind racing and my heart fluttering. All the different possible outcomes have me dizzy. Sitting in the car, I begin to rethink my plan. Why am I here? Searching for family. For a place to belong. To fill the emptiness of losing a part of myself. A part that was taken away from me. A part I’m stupidly desperate to take back. Staring at the house, I heave in a few breaths before finally gathering enough courage to exit the car. With slow cautious steps, I approach the house thinking about what I’m going to say. Whether or not I should ring the doorbell or knock or maybe just turn around and go somewhere else. But before I can decide, I notice the door is cracked open. Panic overtakes logic. Not a single thought or reason stops me from entering the house and calling out for her. Even in the darkness that shrouds the
“I want to go home?” I whine.“You can barely stand,” Wes argues back.“That’s not true.” I can stand, but it’s as if he doesn’t want me to. He’s been crowding me. Hovering. He’s lying to my face and boxing me. “I just want to be in my own bed…” my words die off as my gaze flickers to Levi.I might keep the rest of my words to myself, but Levi knows. What I want most is to get away from wolves. But they’re everywhere. Wes is always here and every time the door opens when he or Levi come and go, there are always wolves in the halls.Levi tries to give me peace of mind, “I’ll speak to the doctor. I don’t see it being a problem.” His words are cautious and almost forced. He’s told me that more times than I can count in the last two days. Does he know something I don’t? Am I not allowed to leave?“Why do we need to ask permission? It’s like I’m being held captive.” The frustration that boils within me tries to explode. It has me jumping to my feet, which I immediately regret. The stitches
I’m not sure what wakes me from sleep, but the more awake I become, the more aches and pains I endure. Eyes barely open, I struggle to sit up. “Ugh, that hurts.” The reason why it hurts slips my mind for a fraction of a second. Cato stabbed me.“Damn it, Nova. You’re gonna bust your stitches.” The familiar voice startles me as he comes from out of nowhere.“Wes? Where am I?” The room is unfamiliar, but Wes seems at ease. This has to be his pack house. “Where’s Gideon and Nox?” I left in the middle of a full out brawl. I need to know what happened. Desperate, I swing my legs out of bed only to have Wes push me back down.“You’re safe. That’s all that matters.” He grabs a chair that was at the foot of the bed, sliding it closer. Was he sitting there all along?No matter what Wes wants to believe, my safety isn’t all that matters. “That’s what I asked.” When he doesn’t reply, I force a response from him, “where are they?” Is his silence because he doesn’t know or because he doesn’t want
Paranoia has me blacking out. Not literally. If only I would pass out. It feels as if I should, but I remain awake and aware of what’s bound to happen. However, I’m not aware of the motions it takes to get there. One minute I’m in the car and the next I’m walking down a trail with Cato right beside me, knife poking into my back. Our final destination, a small gazebo, was already picked out way before our arrival as we’re met with five wolves that seem to step out of the shadows. The perfect vantage point for Cato. Place the bait in the middle and easily surround it from every corner. “You’re gonna sit here,” he pushes me aggressively down onto the bench that runs along the inside of the structure, “try to make yourself look…fragile. You can do that, can’t you?” I don’t answer, so he bends down making sure our eyes meet. “Do I have to make you look fragile? Rough you up a little bit. It’ll make for a good show.” A malicious smile spreads his lips apart. I don’t have to answer before
Standing in the entryway, staring at Twyla, has my entire body on edge. All it takes is a twitch of my legs as if I’m about to make a mad dash for her to tackle me. What next is a confrontation I’m not ready for. “Walk. Dad’s waiting.” My feet don’t move, but when I feel the edge of a weapon dig into my back, I’m forced to comply. She leads me straight to Levi who’s tied to a chair with Cato right behind him, blade to his throat. There’s already a cut across his cheek, blood dripping from his chin. Levi’s cry of my name is cut off as the sharp edge digs in a little deeper. "Nova,” Cato says clearly disappointed, “did you think you could hide from me? Running away was a mistake, but you have a chance to fix it." Sure I can. Cato’s mind is already made up. Someone is going to die tonight. "When you left, I had to make adjustments, settle so to say." "Excuse me?" Twyla snaps. "Settle? You’re not referring to settling…for me, are you?" Wait? What? Cato and Twyla? “Because this means
I refuse to acknowledge the new day. My second day home. It still feels wrong for some reason. There’s a tension that strains my muscles that I can’t quite shake. It’s like I’m a sitting duck waiting for something to happen. Waiting to hear awful news. Levi tries to talk to me, but I can’t seem to hear his words. I’m tired and sore and more than anything I want the thoughts to stop. The guilt and heartbreak. The disappointment that someone I care about will feel when I’m forced to choose which life I want. It’s only when my stomach grumbles that I realize I’ve been sitting here for most of the day. The sun is starting to set and I have still yet to reach out to Lyra and Eden. Not wanting to use Levi’s phone, I open my laptop and message Lyra through her favorite social media site. I’m back! Lost my phone. Coming over. I wait for her reply which doesn’t take long. She wants me to meet her and Eden at The Black Plum. Carelessly, I throw on some halfway fancy clothes as the restauran