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More Than a Name
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2024-10-29 19:42:56The bus cruised down the Interstate while Silvia struggled to untangle her earphones. Finally she was able to plug them to her phone to play some music. And she had another fit of shaky giggles when she heard the beginning of Save Your Soul, and Jim Robinson—Jay, for Christ’s sake!—sang in her ear.
Good Lord, it was just too much. How come such a thing had ever happened? Was it even possible? How could she spend all that time with Jim Robinson and never realize it was him? And what on God’s green earth was he even doing there, in the middle of nowhere, in that rural area north of Fargo, North Dakota?
Later on, back home, Paola would help her see that what had happened was simply impossible to expect or even imagine.
“I mean, we know Brad Pitt came here to ski, and Roger Waters came for some fly-fishing, but you wouldn’t expect to find them at the groceries’, right?”
Yeah, she was right. And
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No Return What Later?
The brothers were welcome at the Miller ranch with a quick lunch, served by Jo and her bunch of friends, who left her to take care of her boyfriend in order to buzz around Jim like summer flies.Like they’d known Jim for years, nobody had even looked at the master bedroom of the big old house, keeping it for him. So he let the girls stalk him for at least an hour before taking possession of his room, to spend another hour in the hot tub.Sean and the others didn’t wait for him to get their rehearsal started. Jim eventually found his way to the library, where they’d set the improvised studio, and joined them. They noticed he didn’t feel like focusing on their regular routine, and spent the next hours mostly jamming.Over dinner, Jim decided he wanted a proper welcome party. The midnight bells from the old clocks all over the house got lost in the loud music and the loud voices.Jim was standing on top of a table, directing his frien
No Return Trout Gone Whale
It was like those fishers boasting about their catch. The first time they told the tale, they would put their hands one foot apart. “It was this big!” they’d say about the size of the trout they’d caught. The second time they told the tale, their hands would be two feet apart. “It was this big!” A week later, they had harpooned down Moby Dick single-handedly and even saved Captain Ahab. That was how the Jay Affair kept growing out of any proportion. Silvia wasn’t sure who she could share the story with. Yeah, Paola, sure. Especially because Paola would help her turn Moby Dick back into a regular trout. But until she could sit down with her friend, she didn’t feel like sharing the story with her little sister and her other friends. Coming home felt like a ton of rocks lifted from her shoulders. Gosh, she’d missed her siblings, her dog, her house, her town. She still had some days of her vacations left, and she f
No Return Regular Me
The video opened to Jim’s smiling face filling the screen. “Hey, there! Here I am, at the Miller ranch, and it finally stopped raining! Let me show you around.” He moved the phone away from his face to show a large rustic kitchen that was a complete mess. “Oops. Cleaning lady’s day off, I’m afraid.” He approached two women that worked at the sturdy wooden table in the middle of the room, their backs turned to him. “Hey, girls!” Both women turned to him, saw he was filming and waved hi at the phone. Jim put his arm around the older one, an African-American beauty in her forties, that shrugged Jim away when he kissed her cheek. “Meet Deborah Golan, the supreme commander of this mess of an army,” he said. “She also works as our full-time guardian angel.” Jim went to the other woman, a pretty girl in her late twenties, her dark hair very short over the back of her neck and almond dark eyes. “And this is dear Jo, my wa
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Catching up with her everyday life was easier than she expected, and that Friday she called on a ladies night to tell Pat’s tale only once. When she was done with it, she said she’d also met somebody before leaving the US. She omitted Jim’s name, and Paola had promised absolute silence, so it looked like just a casual comment on the sidelines. However, Silvia had to bear with a patient smile the well-earned dose of teases about her fixation with gringos. Seeing they were all in an excellent mood, Silvia thought she could start filming for the video Jim had requested. She made sure she didn’t look like the ultimate mess and tried an introduction. Over that week she got used to shooting here and there, a couple of minutes each time, and by the end of the week, after a little editing with the easiest software she found, she thought she was satisfied with her five-minute video. So she followed Jim’s instructions to upload it straight to the blog he had created,
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“This is something no man can witness and live to tell the tale, so keep it a secret. For this is a Sisterhood meeting at the Black Rock—which actually means girls night at my place. Let me introduce you to the council. This is Lady Claudia, our manipulation expert.” “Hi, Jay! Nice to meet you!” “This is Reverend Mother Karim with the procreation wing and my little sis Mika, I mean Acolyte Lolita, which is a pun in Spanish about her boobs.” “Hi!” “Hey there!” “And that’s Paola, who we suspect to be a spy, trying to infiltrate our ranks in order to steal our secrets.” “You didn’t say who you are!” “Oh, well, I’m Superior Mother S, always fighting for the survival of the Sisterhood.” “And now we have to leave you, Jay.” “Yes, we have some vital issues to discuss.” “Yeah! Like comparing guys’ performances, if you know what we mean.” “Yeah!” “Bye!” Jim chuckled under his breath, spraw
No Return One Clip
Jim’s clip found her on a winter Friday night at home, with Paola and Claudia. Silvia read the Twitter DM and asked Paola to make more mate, while she breathed deep and sat down opposite Claudia, to tell her whom she’d actually met before leaving the US.Claudia laughed out loud, refusing to believe a single word she’d just said.So Silvia showed Claudia the video from the Miller ranch, and the blog Jim had designed for them to share their stuff.“Why don’t just have a Facebook private group?” asked Paola from the kitchen, while Claudia gaped at the pictures.“Jay hates any social network related in any way to Mark Zuckerberg,” Silvia replied. “He even calls him Suckerborg! And he swears he’ll never give him access to his phone and personal information.”Paola came back to the table and nodded to Claudia, chuckling. Their friend was still gawking at the one photo of
No Return Bill Me
“Silvia! You okay?” She nodded, blowing her nose with a shaky giggle from the kitchen. She’d pretty much jumped off of her chair when the video ended, trying in vain to wipe her tears away. “But this isn’t the video they have on YouTube,” said Claudia, frowning. Paola huffed. “’Cause it’s not the official video.” “Damned jerk!” Silvia grumbled from the kitchen, lighting a cigarette and shaking her head. Claudia’s eyes were like grapefruits again. “He— He made this video for you?” Silvia shrugged, still fighting back her tears. Paola narrowed her eyes. “That place. It looked like a bus terminal.” “Yeah, that’s where we met. Give me a mate and I’ll explain the video to you guys.” She was still talking when Claudia handed her a mate, while Paola pointed at her empty chair. So Silvia spent ten times the length of the video explaining the zillion private jokes and winks they’d just seen. The
No Return Another Clip
They were having dinner at Tom’s apartment, back to LA, when Jim got on his phone the notification of an update on the blog. It was a quiet evening, only close friends. Jo and Fay were exploring Asian recipes and had them as guinea pigs to try their cooking. After dinner, Jim excused himself and left the living room. Five minutes later he was back, to signal Sean and Jo to follow him. Their friends didn’t pay him any attention. Jim led the other two to the guest room and lay down on his belly, patting the bed for Sean and Jo to sit down, flanking him. He held his phone for them to watch a video. The song was a romantic ballad. Guitar with some keyboards and violins in the background, sung by a woman with a funny accent. And the video was just as simple as the song, no editing pretensions. Sean was surprised to recognize Silvia. Jo’s indie mind liked that it didn’t try to tell a lineal story. It showed two couples in different moments of their
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No Return True Freedom
Silvia woke up to Depeche Mode’s Personal Jesus.The sun was setting and she was alone in bed, tucked in soft sheets that smelled of lemon and the fat white comforter. Jim had left a few hours ago to let her rest, because after those weeks apart, it was plain to see she wouldn’t get any rest with him around.She’d fallen sound asleep, exhausted, and now she had the persistent feeling of being still lost in a dream. But she wasn’t. This was not the Black Rock. It was the Ashtray, her new home, and that music had to be a phone ringing.But not hers. She’d never used that song as a ringtone.She followed the music to the other nightstand, where she found a new phone still inside its open box with a red ribbon. And she laughed out loud when she grabbed it and saw the caller was My Personal J.“Hey, you awake?” Jim asked when she picked up, still chuckling.“Hey, you just woke me u
No Return Yours
They staggered into the bedroom and fell on the bed as they kissed, their hands struggling to get rid of their clothes.Silvia pulled Jim to bring him on top of her, yearning to feel his weight. There was no other body to hers, no other hands to touch her, no other lips to drive her crazy, no other skin to stroke hers. She wrapped a leg around his waist, pushing him down, and moaned when she felt him inside of her, his fire sweeping it all away, and she gave in to his need and his exasperated anxiety.Because that was exactly how he was feeling. He’d never missed her body, he’d never needed her like this. Yet there he was, fighting himself back to keep from going off like a frigging teen, growing crazier with every moan he pushed out of her mouth, every move of her hips, every touch of her fingers, every brush of her lips. Like he would never have enough of her.Why was he feeling this way? Why nothing seemed enough? When had all bodies lost their ap
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Silvia exited the Customs Office feeling stunned and a little dizzy. After such an emotional last week in Bariloche, she’d had to go through the long flight that had taken her to another time zone, another season, another country, another culture, another language. She looked around, feeling she was running on fumes and she was about to pass out any moment now.Jim threw the sign she hadn’t seen into a bin to come stand before her, hands in his pockets and a smile under his black cap.“Looking for somebody?”Silvia just dropped everything to fall into his arms. He held her tight, kissing her hair, and felt her shiver nonstop. She needed a whole minute to fight back her tears and get a little grip on herself. When he assessed she would be able to walk, he took her hand, grabbed the luggage cart with his other hand, and took both to the parking lot without a word.Silvia just let him lead the way. She was there, with him, finally. Sh
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Silvia left before her friends and siblings even registered what she was doing. One minute they were all toasting to her for the hundredth time in the bar, and the next minute she was hugging every one of them, telling them how much she loved them. And then she was gone, all alone.She walked down the street, gazing up at the sky, admiring the colors in those minutes before the early sunrise. Her feet didn’t need to consult with her brain to head straight to the downtown beach, walk down the stone steps and take her right up to the lake shore.She sat down on the cold pebbles and lit a cigarette, face to the east. It was her last sunrise of the only life she’d ever known. The last sunrise with her lake and her mountains. Like so many times before, she wished she could capture every little detail as far as her eyes could see, carve it all in her memory and keep it inside of her, true and unchanged, forever unfading.She watched the sun come up behind
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Tobias and Leandro had done their best to clean up the Black Rock before Silvia came back home. And the outcome made her smile, because the house was squeaky-clean and smelling of flowers. They were surprised to see Mika there too, but Silvia’s look kept them from asking any questions.Knowing the siblings needed time alone for their reunion, Leandro left for Beltane, to have dinner with Claudia. At the Black Rock, Mika went to the supermarket, to restock the fridge with something that wasn’t trash food and make dinner for the three of them.The moment she walked out, Tobias asked Silvia what had happened to their sister to make her lower that proud head of hers, admit her fail and come back home. It was just natural he would take mortal offense when he learned why Mika was actually back. But Silvia would have none of it.“I’m telling you the same I told your sister,” she said. “You don’t want me to keep treating you guy
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It’d been six months since Silvia had last seen Mika, and one look was enough to tell her all her little sister had been keeping from her.Rob and Juan had planned a Saturday night out after dinner, but Silvia resorted to the such-a-long-flight excuse to stay behind.“Would you lend me a hand with the dishes?” she asked Mika.The others understood and took off, leaving the sisters alone.“I thought Lorena was coming too,” Silvia said as they picked up everything from the table.Mika hesitated, found her sister’s eyes and shrugged. “We broke up.”“Oh. You never mentioned it.”“It happened three days ago. I didn’t wanna write to you about it. It was your last days with Jim, and I knew we were meeting today.”They took everything to the kitchen and Silvia asked Mika to make mate while she did the dishes. The girl knew better than trying to beat
No Return The Thing
Silvia almost missed her flight, too absorbed staring at the tiny thing on the table before her.What on God’s green earth was that thing doing there, and in her keep?That white-gold band with a little, discreet diamond.An engagement ring.That frigging coward! Throwing it at her from ten feet away!But no matter the delivery method, Jim had given it to her.His mother’s, he’d said.Bring it back, he’d said.She felt lucky her brain was able to register the last boarding call. She looked up, startled, and jumped to her feet. She was about to hurry away when she remembered the ring. Actually, it was more like feeling a leash tugging at her neck, stopping her from walking away from the table.She spun around on her heels and scowled down at the damned thing.“You…” she growled.The moment she had it in her hand again, she realized how small and light it wa
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It was sort of weird. Being with Jim usually involved having people around, but now they were all alone, making their way through the usual crowd in LAX. Come to think about it, both of them loved having an active social life. Maybe that was why she hadn’t needed any major adjusting over the last ten days in LA.…?Silvia would’ve punched herself best Fight Club style. She had only minutes left with him and she was pondering about their social habits? Really?She checked in for her flight and they headed to the boarding area in no hurry.“So you think you can be back by January ten.”“Yup. I gotta report to work with Jo on the fifteenth, but I want a couple of free days before that.”They walked a whole minute in silence.Silvia wondered why all of a sudden they didn’t seem to have anything left to say. Why were they avoiding eye contact? Why did she feel like getting into the boarding
No Return Jam
“Hurry up or I’m calling a cab!”“Bet you’re dying to do it, you chicken.”“Please, Jay!”Silvia finished raiding the master bedroom one last time, to make sure she wasn’t forgetting anything.“Jay!”“Coming.”She snorted and went to canvass the ground floor. She was just done when Jim came down the stairs in no hurry.“Can we go before I have a heart attack, milord?”“Cool down, woman, we have plenty of time,” he said, grabbing her duffel bag on his way to the front door, where she waited with her rucksack. He paused at the doorway to poke her nose. “Really, such a rush to leave me.”Silvia wasn’t about to explain she was always that upset whenever she had a bus or a plane to catch, so she just scowled at him and followed him out.“Got everything? Tickets, passport?”Silvia ch
