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Downfall
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2024-10-29 19:42:56It felt just so awful, the way the clock jumped back instead of moving forward as they crossed time zones to the west. And with every repeated hour of that endless night, Silvia felt she was losing all she knew and loved, to walk utterly alone into whatever the next days might have in store for her. She expected to feel that way, just like the irrational fear clutching and twisting her guts. She would’ve liked to be able to do something about her instinctive withdrawing into herself to muster her courage and breathe deep before such a leap.
To make it worse, she felt oddly confined in that luxury seat that had her walled up like a baby pen. She could connect with the whole damned world, yet she couldn’t look straight at Jim on the next seat without bringing her feet down from the box under the TV shelf, sitting up and leaning in, past the ugly thing all around her head with more plugs and stuff, and the little counter between the seats.
The moment she moved
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Deborah was waiting for them at LAX, to make sure with her own eyes the Robinsons were back, and mostly to assess Jim’s mood. She spotted the two couples coming out from the Customs Office and a glance was enough for her to know they were back in business. She allowed herself a heartfelt sigh. No more Jim pissed off every time she told him about a public event she couldn’t cancel. No more pressure from the label to make them play live again now that Sean had been cleared by his doctors. No more demos with nothing but gloomy songs about broken hearts. No more bizarre drunk stunts at parties. Well, at least for the next ten days, which gave Debora ten days to come up with some master plan, in order to extend the good season until further notice.Her merry welcome made the brothers trade a suspicious look, but they didn’t make any question while they followed her to the parking lot and her SUV.Deborah was surprised to see Jim didn’t get in the pas
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The house was quiet in the warm silence of the sunset when Jim came out of the shower, still savoring such a gratifying homecoming. He felt as good as new after a good meal, quality sex and a nice nap. Silvia had gotten up while he was in the bathroom and he didn’t hear her around. He headed downstairs, guessing where he’d find her.It felt good, being back where he could enjoy the drops still dripping from his hair, down his chest and his back, without fearing to catch a virulent flu.There she was, of course, at the deck, the place that had caught her attention the moment she’d set foot on his house. Not because of the swimming pool or the comfy loungers or the small bar counter under the hay roof, but because of the view.She was wearing a black top and a light sarong, bare feet on the floorboards, arms resting on the railing, face to the sun setting on the sea, a cigarette between her fingers, her loose hair floating softly in the ocean bre
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Jim’s phone rang at nine, thirty minutes before the alarm he’d set. Silvia slept against his back, and he was trying to turn around without waking her up when her hand showed up under his arm with his phone.“Thanks,” he muttered, and picked up already grumbling, “Fuck off, Deb. I know I gotta pick you up at eleven.”“Just checking. Steve’s gonna be ready to take off at noon and—”“Bye.”“Photoshoot today?” mumbled Silvia when he disconnected and threw the phone on the nightstand.Jim pulled from her hand to round his waist again. “Yeah. And it’s gonna take all day, if I know Steve. Wanna come?”“I’d love to.”“I think I might need a little insisting to take you along.” He pushed her hand down, and jerked when it slid around his hips to grab his butt.Silvia giggled against his back. “Sorry.
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Deborah got an email when they were already driving into the city.“Club opening tonight,” she said, reading it. “Feel like going?”“Yeah, why not,” Sean replied. “Let’s go, dude.”They got no answer from the backseat. Deborah looked back and saw Jim sleeping with his head on Silvia’s lap. She was asleep too, her arms around him.Sean threw a punch to his brother’s legs. “Dude!”“Fuck you,” Jim grunted, eyes still closed.“Club opening. Tonight. We’re going.”“Yeah, yeah.”Back to Jim’s house, Silvia turned pale when she learned that he wanted to take her with him that night, which meant that he would show up in public with her. She fought the temptation of pleading exhausted, reminding herself once more why she was there—to be his everyday woman in his everyday life. If he wanted her by his side f
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The nightclub sidewalk was lit up like broad day, crowded with people, paparazzi and bouncers. People waited in a long line that stretched around the corner from the nightclub gates. The club had a parking lot on one side, but nobody drove in there to access the place unnoticed, so a bunch of valets waited by the curb, to get the cars of the celebs that didn’t have a driver.Jim slowed down right behind a silver Mercedes in the line to the gates. Silvia noticed the bouncers weren’t letting regular people in. At that moment, only those that ranked VIP were allowed into the club, for the crowd and the paparazzi to see.“Wait for me to get your door,” Jim said. “And then it’s only five steps from the car to the access.”“Okay,” she murmured, her eyes on the people screaming and taking pictures of a rapper walking into the club, the blinding spotlights, the flashes firing nonstop.Finding herself in that s
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Silvia woke up to Depeche Mode’s Personal Jesus.The sun was setting and she was alone in bed, tucked in soft sheets that smelled of lemon and the fat white comforter. Jim had left a few hours ago to let her rest, because after those weeks apart, it was plain to see she wouldn’t get any rest with him around.She’d fallen sound asleep, exhausted, and now she had the persistent feeling of being still lost in a dream. But she wasn’t. This was not the Black Rock. It was the Ashtray, her new home, and that music had to be a phone ringing.But not hers. She’d never used that song as a ringtone.She followed the music to the other nightstand, where she found a new phone still inside its open box with a red ribbon. And she laughed out loud when she grabbed it and saw the caller was My Personal J.“Hey, you awake?” Jim asked when she picked up, still chuckling.“Hey, you just woke me u
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“Hurry up or I’m calling a cab!”“Bet you’re dying to do it, you chicken.”“Please, Jay!”Silvia finished raiding the master bedroom one last time, to make sure she wasn’t forgetting anything.“Jay!”“Coming.”She snorted and went to canvass the ground floor. She was just done when Jim came down the stairs in no hurry.“Can we go before I have a heart attack, milord?”“Cool down, woman, we have plenty of time,” he said, grabbing her duffel bag on his way to the front door, where she waited with her rucksack. He paused at the doorway to poke her nose. “Really, such a rush to leave me.”Silvia wasn’t about to explain she was always that upset whenever she had a bus or a plane to catch, so she just scowled at him and followed him out.“Got everything? Tickets, passport?”Silvia ch
