I wake up with Leanna's head on my shoulder, my arm wrapped around her and hers draped loosely across my waist.
It reminds me of our younger years, when we'd fall asleep in the lodge after watching films. The years when all I wanted was to be around her, it didn't matter that our siblings were there too, all that mattered was making her happy.
Then I stupidly kissed her and ruined it all, managed to break my own heart and end our friendship with one stupid act and ever since, the only way I've kept up any sort of contact is by constantly irritating her.
But with her now, sleeping in my arms, something stirs in my chest and I'm afraid the feelings that I've tried to suppress for so many years are starting to resurface.
Like a creep, I watch her sleeping until sunlight streams in through the window, the rest of the house silent and I know, if I'm going to escape unnoticed, I need to go now.
With one last look at the beautiful girl who hates my guts, I wriggle out from underneath her, gently lowering her head onto the pillow.
"Lea, I'm going to go." I whisper. She groans and reaches out for me, almost making me climb back into bed but then she grips her quilt in her hand, settling back to a comfortable sleep.
Picking up my shoes and grabbing my hoody, I unlock her door and step into the hallway, pulling the door slowly to close it quietly behind me.
"Nathan Graham, my sister is absolutely going to kill you, who the hell were you fucking in her room?" Kim's voice is like a foghorn in the quiet house.
Holding a glass of water, she glares at me whilst wearing princess pajamas, oddly making her seem all the more threatening.
"No…" I grimace as three heads instantly appear behind her, all of them looking at me as though they've found new gossip and they're already taking pictures.
Leanna's going to kill me alright.
"Is she still in there? Get her out before my sister gets home." Kim yells, banging on the bedroom door. "Get out here now."
"Kimberley, what the fuck?" Leanna appears in her doorway, yawning, her hair messed up like perfect sex hair and by the look on their faces, I know no one is going to believe we didn't do anything.
"Leanna? I thought you hated him?" Kim gasps, looking between us as though we've grown extra heads overnight and then scowls at me. "Were you drunk? Did he take advantage of you or something?"
"What are you talking about?" Leanna looks at her sister and then follows her gaze to me. "Oh fuck off, do you really think I slept with him?"
Ouch!
Her words send a spike of pain through my chest, I stare between the sisters unable to form words.
"Why else is he sneaking out of your bedroom?" Kim puts her hands on her hips like an angry parent.
"And she's got sex hair." Olivia Hughes, who is still taking pictures of us, pipes up.
"Oh shit, you actually do." Kim grabs her sister's tangled hair and glares at me again. "What the hell did you do?"
"Oh for god's sake, Kimberley. We fell asleep watching Netflix while he was hiding from crazy Georgie." She looks at me for support. "Tell them."
I look at her angry face, there's clear red lines from my shirt and coupled with the inexplicable pain still burning in my chest from her words earlier, I can't resist winding her up a little.
"She used me and now she wants nothing more to do with me, she's broken my heart." I grin at her and she sighs, the girls behind Kimberley giggling and taking more photos.
"Asshole." Glaring daggers at me, she turns to her sister. "I didn't, I wouldn't, you should know that. Now, I'm going back to bed."
"Leanna, wait, I love you, don't do this." I snigger as the door is slammed in my face and we hear the lock click into place from the other side. Kim stands there, staring at me in confusion.
"Ok fine, we didn't do anything, she was telling the truth. I couldn't resist though, she's too fucking easy to annoy." With that, I jog down the stairs and back to my house.
"Nathan, where've you been?" The voice from the sofa scares me half to death as soon as I walk through the door.
"Georgie, how did you get in?" I say, backing away from her.
"The window wasn't locked." She says as though it's perfectly reasonable to break into someone's house and wait for them. I look towards the window she's gesturing at but it's closed.
"Is Gemma home?" She's standing up and walking towards me, a creepy smile on her face.
"No, we're all alone, so what are you going to do with me?"
"Uh… Georgie, I want to be honest, you're a lovely girl..."
Lies, you're a nutjob!
She beams up at me and I realise I need to be clearer.
"But, I'm interested in someone else." Her face falls and her eyes darken.
"Who is she?" She asks and something tells me I really shouldn't give her a name.
"It doesn't matter, she's not interested in me anyway, but I need time and space to get over her." I say, hoping there's part of her that's reasonable. "You deserve someone that's ready to love you."
"You're right." She throws her arms around me and kisses my cheek. "Thank you Nathan, you're so sweet."
"Uh… no problem, see you in school."
"See you." She calls back as she walks to the door and almost skips to her car.
I shudder at the thought of her being in my house all night, my thoughts drifting to the memory of Leanna in my arms. Her perfume still clings to my shirt so I strip off, jumping in the shower to scrub my confusion away.
As soon as I get out my phone vibrates and Adam's name appears on the screen in our group chat.
Adam: You banged Leanna Woodson? WTF??!! How the hell did you manage that?
Nathan: Haha, I've got mad skills! You don't even know.
Callum: You sure it wasn't Kim? Leanna would never touch you. Ever.
Adam: Kim or serious beer goggles?
Callum: Both haha!
Nathan: Fuck you both!
Nathan: Although no, you're right, I didn't shag either of them.
Callum: Explain the walk of shame pic then…
He screenshots a photo of me and Leanna outside her room this morning. I'm grinning down at her while she looks up at me, you can't see the glare I know she's giving me but both of us look dishevelled and very much like we slept together.
Nathan: Fell asleep in her room, hiding from psycho Georgie, who was in my house when I got home btw!
Adam: Seriously?? Did you call the police?
Callum: Leanna's going to flip when she reads the comments.
Nathan: What comments? And no, I think I managed to talk Georgie down so she'll be someone else's problem now.
Adam: Yeah right! She won't give up that easy mate!
Callum: Read them, everyone's loving you two as a couple! Oh shit mate, do you reckon Crazy G will go after you or Leanna when she sees the post?
Adam: It was nice knowing you mate, one of them's going to be gunning for you.
Nathan: FML! Women be crazy!
Callum sends me the link to Olivia Hughes' post and he's right, ninety percent of the comments are supporting us as a couple and the other ten percent are predicting this is a prank, but wishing it was true.
Callum's right, Leanna's going to flip out!
I peer out of the window just as Max Carlisle's loading Leanna's car onto his dad's recovery truck, her tyres are completely flat and briefly I wonder whether Georgie saw Olivia's post this morning and slashed her tyres, but then wonder if I'm being a little unfair to her because she seemed perfectly happy when she left this morning, even if she did break in and wait all night for me to come home.
It can't be! If she'd done it when she left they wouldn't have had time to notice and call Max in that time. It's more likely to be one of the people Leanna refused to let fuck in her room last night!
Some absolute moron slashed my tyres during the party so I have to ride into school with Kim and, even though I'm dreading actually getting to school after Olivia thought it would be funny to post that photo of Nathan and I and make out like something happened, being with Kim puts me in a surprisingly good mood. As much as I complain about having to be the extra responsible one now that she's off following her own path, seeing how happy she is makes it worth it and I'm starting to wish I was more like her. Spontaneous, carefree and full of the absolute joy of life. We pull up outside Liv's house and instead of honking or knocking on the door or even ringing to let her know we're outside, she drops the window, turns the volume up on the radio which is blaring Olivia by One Direction from her phone and sings along at the top of her voice, nudging me to get me t
I hadn't planned to annoy Leanna again, I'd actually thought we could try and get back to being friends. I hate to admit it, but being on my own with her made it glaringly obvious how much I enjoy being with her and how much I've miss her the last few years. She's so funny, easy to talk to and she has no idea how amazing she is, she's too busy comparing herself to her sister and feeling like she comes up short.I saw her this morning, watching Kim dick around and I swear the desire to be doing the same was just rolling off her, I'm surprised her friends didn't notice.I wanted to go over there, drag her out over and chuck her onto that wall, tell her her parents aren't going to be upset if she makes a few mistakes. I don't know why I didn't, but I'm fairly sure after hearing the rumours going around school, she would be more likely to smack me in the face than
Max asks my friends and I to help set up the party, so we drive over straight after school to join the small group helping to set up drinks areas, hiding valuables and breakables, moving furniture and building a bonfire in the garden, because apparently that's the new must thing for high school parties."Hey." He pulls us each into a big hug, leaving an arm around both Mille and me as he guides us into the kitchen. "So, this is the bar area, I need you two to make sure the cups and drinks are all spread out, that ok? Kev and Sam are bringing the crates in from the car.""Sure." He winks at us and then takes Italia and Corrine into the next room as we get to work."Would you judge me if I slept with him tonight?" Millie asks, grouping drinks by type on the counter. "Well, try anyway."
Max's house is a short walk from Adam's, so we get there about 9pm and the party's already in full swing. The living room is filled with a mass of bodies rubbing all over each other as they dance and I can hear a group chanting "chug, chug, chug," in the kitchen while a guy is drinking from an oversized glass tankard. "Kev says there's a bonfire in the garden." Callum says, so, grabbing some beers, we wander through the rooms towards the backdoor. Somehow, despite the horde of people outside, the first thing I see is Leanna sitting and laughing with Max's brother Jack. A pang of jealousy spikes through me and recently I'm finding it harder to suppress whatever residual feelings are lingering from when we were younger. "What're you going to do to her?" Adam sniggers, following my line of vision and
I wake up feeling like a zombie, my head aches, my stomach is threatening to revolt with every movement and my body feels like it belongs to someone else. I've got vague memories of the night before but it's so hazy I'm not sure what's real and what was a dream. "How're you feeling?" Kim puts a cup of tea on the table and although I know she didn't slam it down, the sound ricochets around my brain. "Like death." I croak. "What happened?" "Jake reckons you were spiked, Millie said you were fine before you left her and it was less than half an hour between that and Nathan finding you in Max's bed." "What? Max?" I try to sort through the memories in my head and a fuzzy one where Max and I are kissing in his room seems to hover at the forefront. "Oh god, I didn't, did I?
Leanna looks white as a sheet when she comes out of the room with the tarot woman and I'm worried about what's going on, but then Ms Jewkes is calling my name and gesturing for me to follow her.I have no idea why I'm here, I don't believe in this stuff and the weird stick thing she's burning is making me anxious, it's like I can't breathe properly which is the opposite of what should happen or so I'm told.She gestures to a seat and asks me to sit down, then puts an oversized pack of cards in front of me and tells me to shuffle until I feel ready to split them into three. I do as she asks, because I don't want to be rude, but the whole time I'm wondering what amount of shuffle time is appropriate, in the end I go for slightly longer than I feel I should, just so I don't look like I'm not taking this seriously."Ok
It's the last week before half term, then we'll be going off skiing all together and for the first time in years, Nathan and I are friends again.I'm beyond excited!I hop in my car, singing along to the radio as I drive the short distance to school. My friends are waiting near the school gates and Max is hovering nearby."Do you need us to stay?" Italia hisses to me when he starts walking over."Leanna, can we talk?" He sounds nervous and I try to remind myself that he didn't do it on purpose, he didn't know, it's not his fault. He's a good guy."I'll catch up with you guys in a second." I tell my friends and Max waits until they're far enough away not to overhear before he starts s
I hate that I've resorted to this, but I saw Leanna and Max together on Monday and it damn near killed me, so I need to distance myself from her, at least for a little while.Winding her up is just too easy, her eyes get all intense and she struggles to control herself.I watch her storm off, knowing she's fighting the urge to turn around and at least send me a rude hand gesture, but I want that. Somehow I need that reaction from her, so I clear my throat loudly, seeing her back tense as she anticipates what I'm going to say."Oh and Lea, I know you'll have already packed, but I just wanted to check you were bringing that sexy purple nighty I like so much, you know the one I mean. The one you wore last year for me, the one that's pretty much see-through." She stops dead in her tracks, I can't help the gr
The pains start around 3am. I was in a lovely deep sleep when I was woken to cramps starting low in my back, reminiscent of the terrible food poisoning incident in Venice nine months ago that seems to be the cause of this particular incident. My own lack of education meant I didn't think twice about jumping on Nathan the second I felt better, not realising my contraceptive pill wouldn't be effective during a nearly week long episode of sickness and diarrhoea. We found out about a month after the wedding, two days after moving into our first home together. We'd both taken jobs instead of going to university. Nathan with an accountancy firm and myself at a legal firm, both of us signing contracts which meant they would train us and we would study from home, so while we could only afford to rent a house at the momen
The last few months at school were relatively relaxed, as much as they can be when you're taking exams that affect your future, but in comparison to what we'd been through the previous month's, I'd happily take the exams over and over again.Corrine was right when she said the police could do nothing about what she did, there was nothing illegal done, immoral definitely, but nothing they could charge her with. For the first week she strutted around, casting smug looks at us whenever she saw us and somehow managing to befriend Sally Matthews, so she had people to hang out with.That rapidly changed when Kim and her friends told everyone what she did, the gossip was rampant and although the other kids didn't approve of what she did to Leanna and I, it was the belief that she caused Max to go off the rails that really got her ostracised socially.
I'm not pregnant! It seems I never was. I've taken ten different tests. One from each brand in the shop, just to be sure. There wasn't even a hint of a positive on any of them. I've got mixed feelings. My sister, Jake, Shane and Luke all cheered with each negative result and I'm obviously relieved. There's no way I'm ready to have a baby, but I don't understand why Corrine would do this to me. She's meant to be my friend, Nathan's noticeably quiet, but he gives me a quick smile every time he realises I'm looking at him. I can't work out what he's thinking. After breakfast with the parents, we suggested rather strongly, that they go out for the day together, promising to clean up while they're out and it didn't take long before my dad was dragging my mum out to the car.
While Leanna is sorting things out with her friends, I'm catching up on homework. It feels too normal. With everything that's gone on recently, sitting here trying to figure out maths problems is quite nice. I never ever thought I would say something like that! After that, I lie back on my bed and watch a film, waiting for Leanna to let me know they've gone so I can go over and see her. This is the longest we've been apart since Max took her nearly a month ago and I can feel myself getting twitchy with the urge to check on her. Telling myself it's all fine, I wander downstairs to make a drink and a sandwich. I'm not really hungry, but at least it'll keep me occupied and I take it upstairs to eat while I finish the film. A knock on the door has me jumping out of bed and running downstairs, Corrine's standing there
I feel ridiculous with how nervous I am waiting for Corrine to come over. I haven't spoken to her for three days and she's ignored all my messages. Finally she sent a brief text this morning to say she'd come over this afternoon. Millie and Italia are already here talking about some show they both watched last night. Pretty sure they're trying to distract me, but I feel like my entire focus is downstairs, waiting for her to arrive. There's got to be a reasonable explanation for why she tried to make out like she and Nathan had a thing, right? Millie has reassured me repeatedly that it was the briefest of kisses and that Nathan was not involved at all, I think she thinks that I'm doubting him, which I guess I should a bit. I think I should be upset that Corrine kissed him too but I'm more concerned why one of my oldest and closest friends is behaving so oddly.
The news came early last week that Max has been transferred to a psychiatric unit for assessment, apparently he's still under the illusion that he and Leanna have something and I'm the one standing in the way of that. They're not sure who's most at risk from him; Leanna, me or himself.Leanna feels guilty, like she somehow did something to encourage him or send him over the edge. She keeps asking if I think she was too flirtatious with him, regretting the times she was a bit overzealous in her appreciation of something he did. I keep telling her she's like it with everyone, that she tells everyone she loves them, she told my sister that on our last holiday because my sister hid her a piece of the chocolate cake from being devoured by Luke and Shane.It's just her way, it always has been. I'm fairly sure her friends are the same. Italia and Corrine both to
It's been two weeks since Max took me to that cottage. Two weeks of people tiptoeing around me, treating me like I'm made of glass and trying not to upset me.My parents are being super protective and I understand that, they want to know where I am all the time and I'm having to text them every hour just to reassure them I'm ok, even Kim's finding reasons to be around me all the time and Nathan hasn't touched me more than a cuddle since I got back. I know he wants to, but whenever we even get close to starting something, he backs off, asking me if I'm ok and apologising for pushing me too far, too soon.It doesn't matter how often I tell everyone I'm fine, they think I'm just trying to put a brave face on, but I really am fine. I agreed to see a counsellor that the police recommended, but it all feels like a lot of fuss over nothing.
My parents are furious with me, Leanna's parents were furious with me, I'm pretty sure if I hadn't brought Leanna home after nearly three full days of not knowing where the hell she was, I'd have been being grounded, lectured and they'd be thinking up new punishments for me for weeks. All because I went off to rescue Leanna without taking them or even telling them where we were going, not directly anyway and I hadn't stopped long enough to actually tell Millie where we were heading so they could even follow us. They had to wait at home, helplessly, praying that we would all be ok.My only other saving grace is that I at least called the police and let them know where we were heading and what we anticipated on arrival. Jake saw the trouble I was in, so thankfully didn't mention it was him that called them, it hadn't even crossed my mind, I was too focused on getting to Leanna.
Max's arm is around me, tracing circles on my shoulder, his other hand gripping mine tightly and holding it in his lap. I can feel his erection through his trousers and I'm fairly sure he's holding my hand over it on purpose, almost as if to let me know how much he wants me tonight.My heart's hammering wildly in my chest and I have no idea what time it is, or how long the film's been going on for, but it feels like it should be finishing soon and I'm yet to come up with a plan to avoid having sex with him.About halfway through, he nudged my head so it was resting on his shoulder, so I pretended to fall asleep and I'm resting all my hope on the idea that he won't try to wake me tonight. But that plan is flimsy at best."Baby, wake up, the film's finished." He rubs his thumb over my cheek affectionately and I force