Chapter One

Cara POV

 

I didn’t know if Jake forgot that today was our anniversary, probably not, maybe he just wanted to surprise me, but this time I wanted to be the first to prepare something special for him so I had left work far earlier than normal heading home to cook his favourite dish and decorate the house. I and Jake had been in a relationship for four years now and I had this feeling that finally he would propose, I knew that his excuse for the past years was that he wanted to find a good job so we both won’t live in poverty but I didn’t mind working hard to support the family, I’ve already began planning some little business I would do to help out. 

I had a bright smile on my face when I walked in to the house I shared with Jake. But there was something strange. The door wasn’t locked; I was sure I locked it before I went to work and Jake wasn't to be back home to much later; I walked in but then I saw laying on the floor a female purse; it didn’t belong to me, I picked it up confused, did Jake buy this for me?, but then I saw the bra and panties laying on the floor, which also didn’t belong to me. Then I heard the sounds. 

“Fuck, harder Jake” A girl from up the stairs moaned out, my brain wasn’t processing anything as I walked up the stairs, to our room, the same room I shared with Jake and there they were, he had a red-haired girl bent over as he fucked her, their moans filling the room. 

“Fuck baby, yes” He growled as he pounded into her and I stood there, shocked, confused, so much feelings all at once. I did recognise the girl, she was supposed to be Jake’s ex-girlfriend. I couldn’t move an inch, it was like me feet wouldn't cooperate with the rest of my body anymore,  the pain built up in my chest, exploding through my whole body, he had told me he loved me, that we would live together, that we would have the happily ever after that had always been my dreams, he made promises to me and staring at the both of them, I still can’t believe my eyes, I and Jake had been friends since we were little, I always loved him but was afraid to show my feelings, finally when I did, I was so happy to discover he loved me back, but now watching the both of them on the same bed we made love, I wonder what the hell had been going on between the both of us all these years because it was clear that it hadn’t been love. 

Finally, he noticed me and flung off the bed. 

“Oh shit, this is not what is seems like Cara, please hear me out!” 

Finally, I could move and I raced down the stair, tears dripping down my eyes, I hadn’t even realised when I began crying, but all I feel is pain, it hurts, I loved him with my all, there was just nobody else, not even in my dreams, he had always been the man I loved; I was ready to sacrifice everything and anything for him and it hurts that I had only been the one in the bubble, all those times I had gone out to work my ass out to make sure he was happy, I never knew he didn’t love me, that was the reason he never wanted to marry me and the truth hurts. 

“Please Cara, wait!” he called out as he finally got hold of me and I turned to him, but I couldn’t look him in the eyes. He was a disgrace. 

“Get those filthy hands off me, you cock-sucking bitch. How could you!” I cried out unable to hold the tears, “How could you do this to me Jake, I trusted you, I gave you every single thing, I loved you Jake, how could you break my heart like this, I thought you loved me, I thought you were the one person in this world who cares...” 

“I do love you, it was a mistake, please give me a chance to show you that this is not the person I am” he says but when I look in his eyes I don’t see it, I don’t see the love, I don’t see regret, all these while, I had been the blind one, I had fallen into his trap, I had loved him for the most of my life and maybe it was the desperation that blinded me from the fact that he only wanted to use me.

“Give you a chance?, you lied to me Jake, I never questioned your disappearance, you never left your ex-girlfriend did you? You claim it's a mistake, but it will only be considered a mistake if someone catches you. How many times Jake, How many times did you cheat on me?” I asked, tears flooding down my eyes, I couldn't think, it was all like a dream, it was just... too much.

“I can..” 

“How many fucking times!” I screamed out to him, the urge to hit something very strong and I was never the physical type, I wanted to hurt him, I wanted him to feel even a portion of what I was feeling now. I watch my dreams scatter to pieces. From the look in his eyes, I knew the answer. He had cheated on me far more than he could count. I had come to surprise him for our anniversary, only to find him fucking his ex-girlfriend. 

“Did you ever love me?, or was I just another desperate girl on your list?” I ask, I needed to know if all this years I had been dreaming, if I had been the fool all these years, all that went on between us couldn't be a lie, it just couldn't be, had all those words he had said to me been the same words he repeated to every other unfortunate girl that he managed to trap in his web of lies?. The few seconds of silence he takes to answer the question is enough for me to know the answer. 

"Of course I love you, I always did"

“You really are an asshole, go back to your bitch, you both deserve each other,” I say to him as I walk out of the door. This time, he didn’t follow.   

I ran down the street; the tears blinding my vision, my heart in shreds. Just a few minutes ago, I had entered into the house optimistic. I foolishly thought he wanted to propose to me finally. I should be grateful that I didn't get married to a cheat like him but with the pain am feeling right now, common reasoning seems like the most complex thing.

I fell to my knees when I could run no more and I screamed out, yet I  the pain wouldn't stop. Maybe I just wasn't good enough.