Chapter 4 Lost Alone

She stepped inside, her boots crunching on the frost-covered floor, the sound echoing in the silence.

Her breath formed white clouds in the air, the same as mine, but while mine were ragged and desperate, hers were calm, and measured. She enjoyed this, I knew. She enjoyed seeing me like this—broken, helpless.

“Look at you,” she taunts, “Reduced to nothing, just like you deserve.”

I kept my gaze fixed on the ground, my teeth chattering uncontrollably.

I didn’t want to look at her, didn’t want to see the glee in her eyes, the satisfaction of seeing me like this. But I knew she wouldn’t let me hide for long.

“Look at me,” she commanded, her voice sharp and cold.

I hesitated, but then slowly, I lifted my head. Our eyes met, and I was struck by how much she looked like me—or rather, how much I should have looked like her. She was everything I was not—strong, confident, cruel. She had the life that should have been mine. I was her.

Her lips curled into a smile as she reached into the bag slung over her shoulder, pulling out a piece of stale bread. She tossed it to the ground in front of me, followed by a cup of water, the liquid sloshing over the sides.

“Eat,” she orders, her voice dripping with disgust. “You wouldn’t want your precious baby to starve, would you?” She smirked at the latter statement.

The mention of my child sent a shiver down my spine that had nothing to do with the cold. I looked down at the bread, hard and stale, and the water, murky and foul, and my stomach churned with nausea.

But I knew I had no choice. I had to eat, not for myself, but for the life growing inside me—the only thing keeping me tethered to this world, the only thing that gave me a reason to keep going. The only reason that is making me tolerate Claire right now.

“Bitch,” I used all my remaining force to spit at her, while she just smirks and wipes it off her face gently.

So, she knew I was with a child. And now I’m wondering just how much she knows, If even she was the one that orchestrated the whole ‘ I was a barren thing.’

Slowly, with trembling hands, I reach for the bread. It felt like a brick in my hand. I force myself to tear off a piece, my fingers stiff and clumsy from the cold.

The bread crumbled as I brought it to my mouth, the taste dry and bitter, like ashes on my tongue. I had to fight the urge to spit it out, to gag, but I forced myself to swallow.

“Awnn, very cute but be rest assured will not allow that child to see the light of this world” she threatened with a stupid grin.

I clench my jaw, forcing myself to stay quiet, to not let her see how much her words cut me. She wanted to see me break, to see the last shred of my dignity crumble before her. But I wouldn’t give her that satisfaction no matter what. Heck, I couldn’t.

I felt a discomfort in my belly, I don't know if it was due to the stale bread. I press a hand to it, trying to communicate my love, and my determination to protect this innocent life, even if it was the last thing I did.

But my sister—no, not my sister, the impostor—wasn’t finished. She crouched down in front of me, her face inches from mine, her breath hot against my skin.

“You were always weak,” she whispered, her voice a poison that seeped into my soul. “It’s no wonder they replaced you. Who would want a pathetic, useless thing like you?”

Her words burrow into my mind, feeding on my fears and doubts like a parasite. I had spent so many years fighting to survive, to hold onto the small pieces of myself that hadn’t been destroyed, but now, in this frozen celler, those pieces felt like they were slipping away, dissolving into the ice around me.

With Nate, I was somebody, I knew I was worthy of something but now without him, I was a nobody.

She reaches out and grabs my chin, forcing me to look into her eyes. “Look at you,” she hissed. “You’re nothing. Nothing!. No one.”

Her grip tightened, her nails digging into my skin, but I didn’t cry out. Instead, I closed my eyes, trying to block out her words, her presence.

I tried to retreat into the memories of a time before all of this, before the cold, before the darkness, but even those memories were tainted now, corrupted by the knowledge of what I had lost.

And then, suddenly, the pressure on my chin was gone. And the door opens revealing the man I dreaded seeing.