FAEI couldn’t move. I was trying to breathe. I didn’t even know I had smiled automatically because Lola Leah was smiling. And it was such a sweet smile and I was thinking I was such an evil person for not telling her myself that I had married her favorite grandson.“Baby, relax,” Jigo whispered. “It’s going to be okay.” His hand left mine so he could grip my shoulder and pull me closer to him almost protectively. And I almost winced. We didn’t need protection from her lola. Really.“Oh my kids!” Lola Leah moved to get up, and two of the boys were quickly there, helping her up while the other was pulling her chair out of her way. Her hands were outstretched as those restless feet maneuvered and were approaching us. The Hug. I almost stepped back. But Jigo steadied me. And then she was there, and the air was filled with the sweet smell of expensive talcum powder and I was kissing both her cheeks as she did mine and Jigo’s and we were both getting blessings as she placed her right hand
FAELola Leah had plans to grill us after dinner—I just know it. Jigo and me. The others would be sent to wherever they planned to go for the day. There was no discussion that an Engagement Party would be held as soon as possible for the closest friends of the family to keep up with appearances—a small price to pay for making a much-awaited event secret. That meant guests of about five hundred people. At least.I sighed. It’s started.But I could see how excited Lola Leah was to finally be able to do something she had been dreaming of doing for a very long time. Her eyes were twinkling, her lips couldn’t stop smiling, and her whole being was vibrating with bliss. We all could see this as we wrapped up lunch, the boys itching to go somewhere else. This only made me feel guiltier. We should have told her, included her from the beginning.She suddenly looked at me and I didn’t have time to hide the expression on my face. My eyes even felt a little wetter from unshed tears. Her frown was
CARLI didn’t want to leave her there. I could feel now the whiplash of our new situation. I wasn’t the primary person behind her anymore. She now had a husband. It didn’t even occur to her to fight that I stayed in the room; she just assumed I was teasing Lola Leah like the others. She didn’t need me anymore. She wasn’t thinking of me at all.And I didn’t think it would hurt like this. I was standing on the beach, an expanse of sand and sea in front of me. And noise. Boisterous noise. But my thoughts were left inside the hotel where my Fae was… the only girl I ever let close to me like blood. But it wasn’t enough. I didn’t know how to be a real brother. And I lost her.Guilt and shame slammed into me when I remembered how I had used her image to get off. How I was with my wife, yet my revulsion of her wasn’t enough for me to push her body away. Instead I used her to relieve myself of the traitorous sexual haze that had gripped me since watching the girl I had cared for as a sister fo
FAE“Jigo!”I turned to the voice. Actually, all of us did. We were still in the restaurant, going through the initial and most important detail of the incoming church wedding, trying to wriggle ourselves out of schedules (mostly of the two because I still was officially unemployed and though Lola Leah was long retired, her social calendar was so swamped she still used an assistant), when someone opened the closed double doors and made a noisy entrance.I recognized the voice. It was Gabrielle, one of the females who used to hang out with the guys in the campus. I didn’t know her anywhere but there and it had been a long time since I had seen her. There was little change to her physical looks, I observed as she walked in, her curvy hips swaying. Still tall, and willowy and pretty. She was a cheerleader, and she did ballet. And she was one of those who were nice to me.That was when I still liked Carl. I had always suspected Gabrielle secretly liked Jigo. I wondered if they had ever h
FAE"Congratulations!"A moment passed before Carl reacted to my greeting. He turned to me, finally. But it was a second too long. I trembled as I waited, conscious of guests watching us at his wedding reception.When I saw his familiar face—my beloved's face—I almost burst into tears. But I couldn't do that. There were too many people around us—his relatives and guests who knew about us and my story, that I'd adored Carl Easton since I was ten.He looked dashing in his three-piece suit, this man whom I'd dreamed of for almost half my life. There was no guilt on his face as he possessively held Sarah's tiny waist. Sarah, his bride, was proudly wearing her white wedding dress for the occasion.And Carl's adoring gaze for his bride—my best friend—finally closed the door between my future and my past.I couldn't love him anymore. I couldn't even say if I ever took a break from my feelings for this man who regarded me with brotherly favor as I grew up. He was my late godfather's son. No,
FAEAbout thirty minutes later, I finally came out of the ladies' restroom, hoping I had successfully covered the marks of my crying bout with makeup and eye drops. I hoped at least I had, because there was nothing I could do about how miserable I looked as I trudged back to the wedding reception.But it was most important to me that I managed to calm myself. I had two more hours to spare before the party ended in the late afternoon. And after that, I could do whatever I wanted.As I got near the doors, I caught myself squaring my shoulders and straightening my back. I took a deep breath. I didn't want to look so defeated because that's not what I was. I could do all that behind closed doors, thank you very much.Right now, I had obligations I had to live through, even if it was the last thing I did. Two hours, that's it. Then I could wallow in my self-pity until the next day.Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed a tall man watching me from a distance.I sighed.Jigo, or Spencer Jig
FAEI snickered. It was a secret open to anyone, though it traveled through whispers. Her pitiful friend mooched off of her in between opening her legs to any man who could pay.Then my lips trembled. She was married now to Carl. She didn’t need to do that anymore, right? But he didn’t know. She had supposedly stopped when I took her in. Supposedly.Oh god, I was going to hate myself tomorrow. I would look at my life and see how pathetic it was. How naïve and stupid I was. But that was for tomorrow.Tonight, I just hated my situation. And Tom, for the creepy maniac that he was. Sarah’s sex buddy, the one she sneaked into my condo during the last bar exam review week. God, the unit reeked of sweat and sex, and I had to spring clean the next day.As stressed as I could be, I couldn’t think of sex to de-stress. And if I must? I would un-must if Tom was the last man on Earth to fuck.Oh god. I was drunk. Just thinking of this man and… eww. Akh.Tom and Sarah… and Sarah and Carl.I stopped
Fae"Okay," I whispered to him.I realized then that I had trusted him for as long as I could remember. Even though he was friends with Carl, he wasn't stupid or reckless. When they talked about his misdemeanors, they were just mischievous shenanigans, natural to young, precocious men. If not for his brooding looks, he was more agreeable than any guy I had ever met.Even more than Carl.Why didn't I like him instead?I closed my eyes as he took me from the bar stool into his arms, clinging to him while he lifted me like I was just a sack of cotton.And I liked it. It felt good being taken care of and loved like a little kid. My tears kept falling. Feeling so pitiful and heartbroken, I hid my face on the side of his neck. I raised my eyes when it became quiet around us, only to see we had reached the elevator. I lowered my head, feeling ashamed."Hey...? You awake?" he asked in a soft voice. I made a tiny sound. "Tell me what you're thinking.""You..." I replied, head low. "You know ev
FAE“Jigo!”I turned to the voice. Actually, all of us did. We were still in the restaurant, going through the initial and most important detail of the incoming church wedding, trying to wriggle ourselves out of schedules (mostly of the two because I still was officially unemployed and though Lola Leah was long retired, her social calendar was so swamped she still used an assistant), when someone opened the closed double doors and made a noisy entrance.I recognized the voice. It was Gabrielle, one of the females who used to hang out with the guys in the campus. I didn’t know her anywhere but there and it had been a long time since I had seen her. There was little change to her physical looks, I observed as she walked in, her curvy hips swaying. Still tall, and willowy and pretty. She was a cheerleader, and she did ballet. And she was one of those who were nice to me.That was when I still liked Carl. I had always suspected Gabrielle secretly liked Jigo. I wondered if they had ever h
CARLI didn’t want to leave her there. I could feel now the whiplash of our new situation. I wasn’t the primary person behind her anymore. She now had a husband. It didn’t even occur to her to fight that I stayed in the room; she just assumed I was teasing Lola Leah like the others. She didn’t need me anymore. She wasn’t thinking of me at all.And I didn’t think it would hurt like this. I was standing on the beach, an expanse of sand and sea in front of me. And noise. Boisterous noise. But my thoughts were left inside the hotel where my Fae was… the only girl I ever let close to me like blood. But it wasn’t enough. I didn’t know how to be a real brother. And I lost her.Guilt and shame slammed into me when I remembered how I had used her image to get off. How I was with my wife, yet my revulsion of her wasn’t enough for me to push her body away. Instead I used her to relieve myself of the traitorous sexual haze that had gripped me since watching the girl I had cared for as a sister fo
FAELola Leah had plans to grill us after dinner—I just know it. Jigo and me. The others would be sent to wherever they planned to go for the day. There was no discussion that an Engagement Party would be held as soon as possible for the closest friends of the family to keep up with appearances—a small price to pay for making a much-awaited event secret. That meant guests of about five hundred people. At least.I sighed. It’s started.But I could see how excited Lola Leah was to finally be able to do something she had been dreaming of doing for a very long time. Her eyes were twinkling, her lips couldn’t stop smiling, and her whole being was vibrating with bliss. We all could see this as we wrapped up lunch, the boys itching to go somewhere else. This only made me feel guiltier. We should have told her, included her from the beginning.She suddenly looked at me and I didn’t have time to hide the expression on my face. My eyes even felt a little wetter from unshed tears. Her frown was
FAEI couldn’t move. I was trying to breathe. I didn’t even know I had smiled automatically because Lola Leah was smiling. And it was such a sweet smile and I was thinking I was such an evil person for not telling her myself that I had married her favorite grandson.“Baby, relax,” Jigo whispered. “It’s going to be okay.” His hand left mine so he could grip my shoulder and pull me closer to him almost protectively. And I almost winced. We didn’t need protection from her lola. Really.“Oh my kids!” Lola Leah moved to get up, and two of the boys were quickly there, helping her up while the other was pulling her chair out of her way. Her hands were outstretched as those restless feet maneuvered and were approaching us. The Hug. I almost stepped back. But Jigo steadied me. And then she was there, and the air was filled with the sweet smell of expensive talcum powder and I was kissing both her cheeks as she did mine and Jigo’s and we were both getting blessings as she placed her right hand
SARAHThe phone was ringing but I couldn’t be bothered to answer. It was only when I heard the banging on the door that I realized who had been calling. Tom was the only person who knew I was back in the condo unit where I lived before, and that I had left Carl’s house three days ago. There was no one to call to help me move. I had no one. I even refused Carl’s offer to help by making his driver go with me. Not only did it feel like an insult, I also didn’t want him to know where I would go while I thought of what next to do. Up to the last minute, I had hoped he would change his mind. That the three days we spent together would make him reconsider what I could do for him as his wife, not just in the bedroom but as a partner. I could learn. I got this far because I worked and studied hard. I could go anywhere.But the third day, I woke up to find him dressed and ready to leave, taking my copy of the keys to the house, handing an ATM where I could take my initial expenses as I settl
JIGO“Do you ever wish for a honeymoon, baby?” I asked.Fae moved slightly from her lazy recline against me. We both faced the windows in the bedroom as we idled on the bed, spooning, after that first hot and fast fuck. I still couldn’t remove the smile on my lips. I had been a little rough, but I couldn’t help myself. I couldn’t control my response to my wife’s arousing groans and her body’s response to me.“Isn’t it like we’ve been on a honeymoon since that night you took my virginity from me? It felt like we’ve been at it like rabbits, honestly. We've been making love all day, sometimes twice, since you started sleeping in my bed.”I pulled her closer to me as we snickered. Then she turned her body towards me and her lips clamped to mine, her arms wounding their way around my neck, and there came back my boner.“Hmm… when are the guys expecting you?” she asked in a sultry voice as her body rubbed against mine.But I wasn’t ready to get that easily distracted. “Baby… the honeymoon.
FAE“I can’t believe the first time we’re back here again… it’ll be with him, of all people,” was what I whispered to Jigo as we got off the tarmac towards our waiting car. We flew via heli during the weekend as soon as he was free from work. The others had been here since Thursday with Carl. I wasn’t even still sure why I was here with him. It was Carl’s week with his other friends.I felt like I shouldn’t be here but Jigo insisted I came with him. I avoided the guys two days ago when they rushed to Jigo’s—our—pent suite when they found out what happened at the club and that Carl was there and the wife wasn’t going to be around. I slipped out before they could arrive because I didn’t want my presence and questions about me and Jigo to overshadow whatever male support the others were ready to shower Carl. At that point, on a group call, they already found out Carl and Sarah were separating three days since arriving from their honeymoon. They were probably going to talk about details a
JIGOWhen I left, the way Fae was treating the situation eased my worries about leaving her with Carl. Therefore, as I drove back to the pent suite I wasn’t thinking much about worse scenarios.Then I opened the door to the house with my key card and their laughter and easy banter from the direction of the dining area assaulted me. I became as stiff as a rock in the doorway, my whole body racked with fear and jealousy.It took a moment for me to wrestle myself away from those almost debilitating emotions. I rubbed my face with my hand and felt the tiredness from the almost sleepless night and the long day before that. I tried to school my face into obedience. In the few weeks we had been together, Fae had quickly become acclimated to my every mood and this was something I really didn’t want her to see. I trusted her. I kinda trusted Carl, too. It was my own insecurity—I didn’t even know I had this until right now—to their friendship that was gripping me at the moment.I wanted all her
JIGO“He came in before dark with a few companions—all of them women. The others have left so he is alone inside. I’m not sure where to call. He’s been telling everyone he’s single and available when he got drunk so I didn’t think I should call the missus. I called you, sir.”“You did good, Riggs. Thank you. I’ll take care of this.” I patted the manager’s shoulder before sliding the key card on the slot to the door of the private room where Carl was in. It was one of the larger ones executives and CEOs usually booked to entertain team members or clients. We didn’t normally use this, though. Our friends were all single except for Carl just recently, and me, secretly. We preferred seeing the crowd and welcomed the noise of merriment and relaxation after work. Or we used to.I pushed the door open and there was my friend, sleeping like a log on one of the long couches, one arm had dropped on the floor. I took a deep breath. Even in sleep, his face looked troubled. He had never seen Carl