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Needy

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I couldn't fall asleep no matter how much I tried. Every time I drifted asleep the image of Randy on top of her flooded my thoughts. I had to push them out of my head, but then all the what ifs started.

What if I didn't go to the lake? I wasn't planning on it until my dad made me deal with Alvarez. What if I didn't run as fast? What if I didn't start running the second I heard her scream? What if we found her dead after Randy took her body? What if it happens again?

My head was spinning with memories of what I did see, images of what could have happened and hundreds of other possibilities. My body kept tensing and a few times Alley winced in her sleep from me holding her too tight. Even though she was in my arms I wanted to be closer to her. I know it made no sense but nothing made sense anymore.

I didn't give a shit how anything in life played out other than this girl's life. I didn't know how to protect her, how to love her. All I knew was that I was never letting her go.
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