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102 : Fucked Up
Last Updated:
2022-12-26 23:27:04
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My Boyfriend's Cousin 103 : Turning Point
I entered the toilet cubicle in a hurry, and chose to sit here. Maybe for the next few hours, until everyone leaves and the fucking party is over. I took a breath and let it out slowly. Unable to control myself, and unable to calm myself down. Rafaella isn't here and I can't say anything without her.Everything feels so chaotic, more chaotic than yesterday, and I can't help it. My tears came out and I didn't bother to wipe them away.Why is everyone playing with my life so easily? Why am I unable to do anything but surrender to everything they do for me? Rhysand wanted me to be his bitch, and make threats I couldn't resist, and Reagan... purposely made me a tool to exact revenge on Rhysand, which meant absolutely nothing to me.I'm just a tool.A tool to their satisfaction, and I may be less than the bitch they have.I looked down, wiping my face and squeezing my hair a little strong when the throbbing in my head felt so great."Amanda? Are you in?" That familiar voice made me stop so
Last Updated : 2022-12-27My Boyfriend's Cousin 104
I've told myself several times that I should be able to fight back, shouldn't let myself sit back while people feel entitled to my life and control me as much as they like. I've done this many times, and scolded myself. Cursing myself, but nothing has changed.I'm still that kind of woman, even when I feel free, I still don't realize that there are many people behind me controlling me like their puppets. Like a scared caged cat doing self-protection, I couldn't do anything but hug myself in a corner, and then let someone stroke my chin and comfort me.I don't want to do that anymore. I want to stand alone, and fight whatever they all have planned for me.I want to be brave and also be firm with myself so that they don't control me around like I can't do anything on my own.And because of that I always have a very big envy of my twins. And I want to be her. She never let our father or anyone else control her. Standing beside me is like the bold side of me that never existed with her co
Last Updated : 2022-12-28My Boyfriend's Cousin 105 : Hatred
The journey to where Rhysand took me was a mass of hazy images, fragments of dreams in a wave of pain so terrible that ran through my body.There is sound.Voices I recognized, that were tinged with worry.And then there are gentle strokes that touch my skin and over me until I fall back asleep and then Rhysand's warmth and voice is a whisper heavy against my skin, and then nothing.When I opened my eyes again, confusion swept over me. I recognize the open ceiling and the scent of dark spices and pine lingering in the blankets tucked around me, but I can't remember how I ended up in Rhysand's room in the castle. My gaze shifted to the soft sunlight that was creeping in through the large window that was obscured by heavy silver curtains. The last thing I remember is Rhysand hugging me, and then everything is blurred in a broken image."Amanda?"A sudden heartbeat hit my ribs, I turned towards a female voice.Gabriella.She stood up from the couch with a grand accent in this room. Her e
Last Updated : 2022-12-29My Boyfriend's Cousin 106 : Cold
This morning New York has been pelted with snow again, and, to hell, if I don't mind it. I sat back at the head of my hospital bed and watched the snow rain through the glass doors that led to the balcony. My gaze remained there for a few minutes and I thought of nothing but one thing behind the emptiness in my heart.Everything's been fine, though. I'm already fine. Some cuts and bruises have healed and the effects such as dizziness and fever have also disappeared. Daddy said I might be able to get out of the hospital tomorrow. I'm thankful about that and then about a few things.Apparently Daddy really has decided not to continue the engagement. Rafaella said that Daddy had even taught Nicholas de Sanctis' younger brother a lesson. Rafaella wasn't even sure if that guy would bother me again because this time Daddy gave me more protection and gave some warning to that motherfucker. I know that Daddy loves me very much, and it's not just based on those feelings, but regret and guilt.
Last Updated : 2022-12-30My Boyfriend's Cousin 107 : The Other Girl
I tightened my grip on my steering wheel when I finally reached RID.It's only been a day since I was released from the hospital but, damn it, I can't hold myself in my apartment anymore. Even though Ronald had told me that his big boss, a.k.a Rhysand del Millero was giving me a week off, I still couldn't calm down. Plus the thought of him not showing up at the hospital, anywhere, and not contacting me.All those bad feelings overtook me so horribly.My mind is wandering and I think I'm going crazy if I'm in my room in the next twenty four hours. That's why I ended up here this morning.To work.And the courage that was in me just now has gone nowhere now. The nervousness completely overtook me. Images of what I should do when I meet Rhysand fill my mind.Inhale slowly, hold it, and let it out slowly. I tried to calm myself over and over again.And on my exhale on the count of five, I grabbed my bag from the passenger seat and got out of the car. Smoothing my shirt under my coat and k
Last Updated : 2022-12-31My Boyfriend's Cousin 108
I've never been in love before, and that's why I've never felt the pain of it.I only accept one or two boys to be my boyfriend because I think that I want to get new things, like what Rafaella got. Experience with a lover. And it all didn't end well for me.Kevin, my first ex-boyfriend was an asshole incarnate from hell, and I didn't appreciate a single second I spent with him. I hated him then and I hate him now.And I got together with Jordan. I used to think that I loved him, that what I felt from him was pure love. In the past, I didn't know how to feel in love, what anyone would really feel when they really fell in love with someone. All I know when I'm with Jordan is comfort, safety and normality. He's like a friend, and everything just seems normal. What I feel for him is admiration and pride because of what he did for people in the midst of war and people in poor countries. It all touched my heart and I believe that he is the best for me.But I know that's not real love. Eith
Last Updated : 2022-12-31My Boyfriend's Cousin 109 : 21+ : The Devil Within
Waking up with pain all over my body made me frown. I pulled up the thick blanket with the scent of musk enveloping me and then let out a rough breath. A jumbled image appeared in my brain and it made my head throb with pain.The effects of alcohol are still there. And my aching body definitely isn't one of the reasons either, right? I move my head on the comfortable pillow that is so comfortable, inhale the familiar scent that overwhelms me. The scent of someone I've missed and longed for so much. And I.. I don't know what happened to me.But I found myself in a garden, in the middle of such a beautiful garden. Decorated by butterflies and dragonflies. The pool was at the end, and I walked quickly to get there. I looked down, staring at my own face which showed my long hair and my innocent face and so pale. I'm wearing a white dress, and I look beautiful. I spent time admiring myself beyond the churning waters. But something... the weight of the heavy air that came with gripping inte
Last Updated : 2022-12-31My Boyfriend's Cousin 110
Rhysand was already out of bed—standing with his back to me, putting on his shirt. I rushed to sit up while grabbing the blanket to cover my naked body with my hands that were still shaking violently. The whole inside of me also did the same thing. The man turned around, looking at me expressionlessly."Stop fighting me, and I will apologize." he said, flatly.I frowned deeply. Anger rose until it stuck in the middle of my throat like a ping pong ball. This man is truly unrepentant.What an asshole.Reflex took over me, I picked up the decoration from the nightstand and without thinking anything else, I threw it with force.What a shoot.It hit his head.Rhysand winced, touching his forehead with his palm. Bloody one.Then, he glared at me, I just stared at him with a gaze that succumbed to my anger. I fought him, even though it wouldn't do anything, but it would let him know that I was really mad at him. On the other hand, I'm looking forward to it. The anger he would throw at me bec
Last Updated : 2023-01-07
Latest chapter
My Boyfriend's Cousin Epilog
Rhysand. I caressed her face, amazed at how soft her skin was, and how it would still be beautiful even when she fell asleep with her mouth open and her hair messy.I planted a kiss on his forehead, stroking the enlarged belly, containing our two children. Something lit up inside me. Happiness and many more thrilling feelings that make me always kneel in front of her.I kissed her again, kissing her face with light kisses, and biting her cheek which were more chubby than before.Cute.She writhes under me, grunting when her sleep is disturbed. Her hand pushed my face away, I chuckled."Stay away from me, Rhys. I still want to sleep." Her scolding comes back, and butterflies fly in my chest when I feel that this is real. That she was already in my arms and no one would be able to take her away from me. Even her my famlily, and my family.I put my face on her neck, sipping on the skin of her neck, inhaling the scent that will never bore me. "I love you." The words just came out.She sh
My Boyfriend's Cousin 149 : The End
Rafaella isn't much different from our dad, I spent the afternoon listening to her talk about how I should divorce him, raise my two kids with them instead of Rhysand, saying that Rhysand was a bad influence on our kids.I never paid any attention to her. Never bothered about her, I never even filled it into my mind. All I did was hear her, and make a face that I didn't care about what she said. She left when she got tired of lecturing me.Rafaella can be a supportive sibling, and so can I, but she can be a bitch sometimes and always brings something up, whatever she does is keep me wrong, and makes me the coward of all. I know that it's in her nature, but now I can't take it anymore. I was just trying to put my real face on, and tell her that I never heard any of the lectures she gave.I never got any support from her, all she did was blame me and say that everything happened because of me. I did feel it was a mistake, that I should have stayed away from Rhysand. But I have never reg
My Boyfriend's Cousin 148
Rhodes, Greece, Two Months Later.Silence.Quiet.Silent.Empty.Empty.I leaned myself on the small green sofa bed on the balcony. Staring at the beautiful scenery in front of me. Beautiful Lindos beach, and some small kayaks that reach almost the middle of the beach. I put my pregnancy book on top of my stomach which was protruding more than it should. I know that because I'm carrying two babies, and Rafaella often looks at my belly in horror. I don't feel bad about it. Pride and happiness seep into my chest. Realizing that I will be a mother soon.On the other hand the emptiness and silence still surrounds my heart. Shadows and hopes for someone to be by my side to be with me, and face this together. I knew that I was too naive, too hopeful that he would come to me, and take me home. That he would do everything for us. But I'm sure he will. I can't deny how crazy he is and how he could do anything for me. I've been in that position before, and I underestimate his love if I dare to
My Boyfriend's Cousin 147 : Rhysand : A Flashback
Seven years later.I leaned back in my chair after finishing chatting with business colleagues who happened to stop me and engage me in conversation with so much nonsense.I took a sip of wine, putting my hands in the pockets of my formal trousers, looking at a woman sitting with her family. There were two women with the same face, and I didn't have to bother to tell which was the other and which was the woman I had been obsessed with for the past seven years.Amanda Dimitriou.Yeah, I've fallen that deep for her. There wasn't a day I spent without watching her from afar until I could even recognize her from a hundred meters away. If she only knew what I've done—how many people's blood I've spilled just because of that about her .. would she have run away?Well, of course yes. Do i care? No. The thing Amanda should know is that she can't run away from me when I come to claim her later.I've already made a plan. Did something to her : got her wasted tonight, stole her, and then brought
My Boyfriend's Cousin 146 : Rhysand : A Flashback
It's all fun, and feels so fast.Feels hazy, and so satisfying until I wake up in the morning. Sitting myself on the bed of a two hundred thousand dollar hotel room, staring at the messy bed room. Someone messed up this room last night, and I know it was me. Well, I was drunk, which I never do anymore. I have a high tolerance for alcohol, and I never want to make myself vulnerable in a crowd. I would choose to get drunk in my own room, and then face a headache the next day.Exception for tonight. It's like I'm back in my early puberty : high on alcohol, and then finding a different woman every weekend sleeping in the same bed as me. Naked, of course. I've rarely done that, at least I've never done it in a high state and then forgot the safeguard I always use. I wouldn't take such a risk while I was having conscientious sex, and relief washed over me to see the ripped condom packaging on the floor.I believe my hangover came from exhaustion after having fun and exploring five countries
My Boyfriend's Cousin 145 : Rhysand : A Flashback
I realized that I was twenty-two years old, and I had graduated from a business school in New York.It's really an extraordinary thing, and on the other hand it's so annoying.I wanted to grow up, to be able to do something wild, to have more power for it, to be free and then to die with satisfaction. On the other hand I realized that I would never be free from anything. There is a great responsibility that is tightly tied around my neck, and there are many hopes that rest on my shoulders.My grandfather from my father side, and my grandfather from my mother side—they all expected me to become the successor to the business empire they had worked so hard to build themselves.I always thought that if I deserved it all, I had enough self-confidence to make it. More than that, I love them, cherish them. Well, even though I hate their children, I love the parents who gave birth to them. Those two middle-aged couples replaced the love that Bellva and I should have received from two selfish
My Boyfriend's Cousin 144 : Rhysand : A Flashback
I don't trust other people.They are fickle, prone to errors, and don't know what they are doing often.They are useless, tasteless, and should not pollute the air with their breath. The disdain I have for these people has been ingrained in me ever since I grew up from the small child phase and gradually discovered what the world is all about.I don't believe in the chance system either. People don't get two or three chances with me. One mistake and they're out.Forever.Anyone who crossed the line once would do it again if given the chance. It's the forbidden fruit, the gratification deferred, and the glorification sought. If they get one taste, they will be compelled to taste another.Then another. And one more.Until they are reduced to animals pursuing their basic needs.Giving them the chance to get close to the line, let alone cross it, is the personification of stupidity.My zero-tolerance policy might describe me as cold-blooded and heartless, but it was better than being labe
My Boyfriend's Cousin 143 : Separate
My blood rushed under my skin when I saw him.And those same green eyes as mine are adrift with me.His expression hardened, and he started walking towards me. I froze, not knowing what to do with his sudden presence."Are you all right, Amanda?"I shook my head.My heartbeat slowed down when my older brother had stopped right in front of me. That familiar musk scent came to my nose. His face hardened, and underneath it was the longing he had for me."Maven.""Amanda..." he said harshly. "You have no idea how much we flustered looking for you? How long we waited to meet you.""I'm fine." I said. I looked at Jade who was looking at us in confusion. "We'll talk for a bit. You don't need to worry, he's my brother."I know Jade already knows, but I just wanted to let her know that so there's no understanding at all. Jade nodded, and then left us.Maven catches the eye, and leads me to the other end of the room. Close to the exit."I'm fine. You don't need to worry, Maven." I gulped. "I'm
My Boyfriend's Cousin 142
Husband and wife.I never thought that I would experience it so quickly. I didn't expect that my status had changed in two days. So short, and fast.A mother and a wife.My heart expands with happiness as I pull off this elaborate dress with Jade's help.He walked into the bedroom, and that was it.. it felt different and not different. He sat on the edge of the bed. He looked at me, with heat in his eyes, and a bright light in them. I drew closer to him. Stop, and stand between his legs. He hugged my waist, kissing my stomach that was under his shirt that I was wearing. I love wearing his t-shirt, I love his signature scent that never goes away, and it always makes me feel comfortable."I should take off your dress, Wife." he said.His other calls made me smile. Happiness exploded in my heart. "The dress is quite beautiful, and expensive. I will not let you mess it, husband."He looked up, his smile bright."Are you happy?" I stroked his face.He nodded. "Very happy."I sat astride hi
