The following fortnight was filled with work and finalizing my application. The morning sickness seemed like an all-day sickness sometimes, and I quickly realized that this child had a strong aversion to dairy products. It felt strange realizing that the things I used to like to eat didn't matter anymore. As much as I wanted to hide and pretend that this wasn't happening, my body was changing quickly, and the tiny person inside my belly would not be ignored. The only thing I could do was take one day at a time, and I invested most of my time in researching more about giving up my baby for adoption.
Today was one of the slower days at work, and I was counting down the minutes until my shift was over. I was meeting Tammie for lunch first; then, we were going for my first ultrasound appointment later. As soon as my alarm went off, I quickly got ready to leave. I was so rushed that I almost bumped into a lady at a corner, pushing her baby in a stroller. "Oh, I'm so sorry," I apologized profusely. "I wasn't looking where I was going." "It's alright," she said as the baby smiled and revealed four tiny teeth. "Look at her. She's just having the time of her life." The woman added, looking at the baby with pure adoration. It was such a simple thing, but how she looked at that baby was just so beautiful. I felt tears coming on, yet another thing that my body had started to do without my consent since becoming pregnant. "Are you alright?" The woman asked with a concerned look. I nodded and excused myself before walking away as fast as possible. When I finally got to Tammie, I threw myself into her arms, and she held me for about a minute without question. "Sorry, pregnancy hormones," I said when I finally pulled away. Tammie didn't smile at my attempt to lighten the mood. "Are you okay?" I nodded and wiped my face. Tammie took my bag, and we sat down at our table. Luckily, we were seated outside, so the fresh air quickly helped me return to normal. "You look like you are losing weight," Tammie frowned. "Isn't it supposed to be the opposite? You are taking care of yourself, aren't you?" "I'm fine, just having a little bit of trouble with morning sickness, but I think I'm getting the hang of it." "Are you getting the hang of the spontaneous tear fests as well?" I gestured to my face and smiled. "Don't I look pretty adjusted to you?" Tammie laughed and patted my hand. "I've never seen you look better." We ordered and enjoyed our lunch, but my mind was still on the woman and her baby. This sadness was welling inside of me as I thought I wouldn't get to have that with my child. Tammie asked me what was wrong, but I couldn't explain it to her when I didn't understand it myself. Two hours later, we were at the local maternity clinic, my stomach bared and ready to see the baby for the first time. The doctor was amazing, explaining every step of the process and even recommending downloading an application on my phone to track the baby's size. The baby was currently the size of a kidney bean. I thought of how amazing it was that such a tiny thing would grow like the baby I had met earlier and then become a toddler, a teenager, and eventually an adult with their own opinions. As I saw my little bean on screen for the first time, it hit me like a tidal wave. A strange feeling washed over me as I imagined another woman pushing my child in a stroller, showing them the city. I thought of the first steps, the first tooth, and the first everything. The baby was a faceless person to me, just a little kidney bean, but it would be someone with a whole personality someday. Would it have my red hair or Michael's brown hair? I suddenly felt protective of my unborn child, and the thought of being separated from it made me feel hollow and cold. All the things I would never get to experience suddenly trumped my fear of being a single parent, and I felt the waterworks coming. "I'm sorry," I sobbed, wiping my face. The doctor smiled. "Don't worry. The first time is always the most emotional. Almost everyone cries; even the fathers cry too." I looked at Tammie, and she squeezed my hand in support. The doctor finished the ultrasound, gave us a printed copy, and then left us for a moment to update my file. "I don't think I want to give my baby away," I blurted, earning a surprised look from Tammie. "Are you sure?" I nodded. "For the first time, it all became so clear to me. This is my baby, Tammie. They are a part of me that I'm unwilling to part with. And I know it's not all rose petals and honey, but I can't let my child grow up somewhere in the world without me." "Jade –" "I know it will be hard, trust me, I know. But can you imagine every child I bump into years from now? If they are the right age, I'll wonder if that's my baby. And I don't want to wonder or regret anything. I want to keep my child." Tammie was quiet for a long time, and I began to worry that she thought I was insane. I probably was a little crazy, as I was twenty-two and thinking of becoming a mother. But I was already a mother in some ways, having taken care of my little sister since she was thirteen. I was no stranger to hard work and knew I would have to work extra hard to support a child. "No matter what, remember? I got your back, always. Call me dependable Auntie Tammie." I laughed and squeezed her hand. "Thank you, Tamz. I'll need all the free babysitting I can get." She smiled. "Well, as long as you are happy to pick up your baby with a dirty diaper, I am not going anywhere near that." I laughed again and wiped my eyes. "Got it. I'll have him potty trained by the time he's two months old." "Or her," she pointed out. "Or her," I agreed. Only time would tell if the little one inside me would turn out to be a little girl who took after me. Or a little boy who would take after a father he would never know.Michael"Sometimes, I think you forget whose name is on your paycheck every month!"My assistant, Daisy, raised a brow at me, and I reigned in my anger. I took a deep breath and faced the windows, taking in the beautiful view. I listened to the man on the other end of the line apologizing, but I was not interested in apologies. Never, in the history of my family legacy, had the Fletcher fortune been enhanced by apologies. And what people didn't realize was that it wasn't my vanity that fueled my passion for succeeding but the responsibilities that I had. To most, I was just a thirty-four-year-old man who had been born with a platinum spoon in his mouth. In truth, I was just a couple of millions shy of becoming a billionaire, but that wealth supported many people.I had thousands of employees and charities that needed me to be the best I could be. There were scholarships in my family name that sent hundreds of kids to school each year, not to mention the medical donations that saved th
JadeToday was one of those days when everything was not going my way. I had spent the entire afternoon shopping with Robin for some new shoes and school supplies, and it seemed we had both reached our breaking point. He had asked for everything he saw, and I was now tired and broke. If only there were a way to explain to a stubborn six-year-old that mommy didn't have money to buy everything he wanted. Especially things he didn't need. I thought that after six years of doing this, I would be a pro by now, but there was no manual for motherhood, and on days like these, one just had to be extra patient."I want ice cream, Mommy," came another request.There were a few fancy restaurants as we walked by, and just ahead of us was a gelato place. I must admit that the large banner with different gelato cones looked appetizing, but I had just bought Robin some yogurt an hour before."We are going home, Robin, and you left ice cream in the freezer, remember?"There was a small tub of vanilla
MichaelI had to give it to Jade. She was one damn good actress. She stood there, pretending she had no idea what I was talking about and looked at me like I had lost my mind. This acting only angered me even more. It was one thing to lie and another to stick to that lie as if it were the truth.She was almost the same as I remembered her, only a little older now. Her face was free of makeup, but she looked so gorgeous it was almost painful. I wondered if she had continued with her modeling; she certainly had the face for it. And that hair was sure to land her many shampoo commercials. But then again, her beauty and my attraction to her had never been the problem. It was her integrity."Mommy?"The little voice brought me back to reality, and I looked at the little boy next to Jade. When I had left the restaurant, I had seen her bend over to talk to the child, but funny how I hadn't paid him any mind once I finally came face to face with her. It was like the world around us had disapp
JadeI held it together pretty well until I got home, and then it finally hit me. I had just seen the father of my child after several years, something I had never thought would happen again. How did a normal, boring shopping day turn out to be so eventful? It went from zero to a hundred, too fast for me to catch my breath. Robin ran to his room as soon as we arrived, excited to finally be home after a long day. It gave me a little time to process everything and not just fall apart in front of him.I wentinto the bathroom and splashed some water onto my face, telling myself I wouldn't cry. It would not solve anything or help me in any way, no matter how much I wanted to cry. I wondered what I had done to piss the universe off because I certainly didn't deserve this. I was by no means perfect, but I always strived to be the best version of myself and lead by example for my son. Now my life was being turned upside down again, just when I thought I was getting the hang of it.I tookmy ph
"Shit, he saw Robin?""Yeah, but he somehow assumed that I'm married and that I used him. I had to leave before he said anything worse in front of Robin, but he was so angry, Tammie. And I got mad at him too, and it was all just one huge disaster.""I'm so sorry, girl. Maybe now it will help you finally stop pining for him."I scoffed. "I don't pine.""Yes, you do, missy, and if you pine any harder, you will turn into a pine tree."I couldn't help but laugh at that. "You are insane, but unfortunately, I love you anyway.""So, what are you going to do?" She asked."What's there to do?""Don't you think it's fate that he's back in town after all these years, and you just happened to meet each other?""Why didn't fate intervene when I was busy looking for him to help me care for our son?""Because you can't question fate, duh! She has her own way of doing things that all makes sense in the end."I laughed and shook my head. "That is crazy, and you know it. Robin and I had our rhythm goin
Michael"Just a second, Mr. Fletcher."I sighed as the receptionist typed something into her computer, making me wait another minute. I had another meeting in a couple of hours, and I needed this council meeting to go well and on time. I checked the time for the fifth time since I arrived, and my impatience only increased.I turned away from the receptionist to look around, needing to look at something other than her. I didn't know if it was how the system was or just her, but there was a need for improvement. Just then, a large group of kids walked through the main entrance. It was more of running than walking, but it was to be expected judging by the children's ages. One of the kids stopped and looked my way before breaking from the group and running toward me. I frowned when he stopped before me, giving me a large grin. It was only then that I realized this little fellow was familiar.Damn."Hi," he said with a small wave.It reminded me of the first time I met his mother, and she
JadeI sneezed as the detergent filled my nostrils, a signal that I probably needed to take a rest now. After dropping Robin at his friend's, I had been cleaning all afternoon, taking advantage of having the apartment to myself. They were having a slumber party, and I trusted Tommy's mother to take good care of him, even though I didn't envy her having to monitor six little boys for the night.My phone rang, giving me the chance to rest for a little as I went to answer it. I took off my gloves before picking the phone up from the kitchen table, seeing Tammie's name on the screen.I smiled as I answered. "Hey, are you home now?""Just got in, but we might have a problem."I laughed, knowing that Tammie's definition of problems ranged from bad hair dyes and needing help to break up with boyfriends. Whatever it was, it was never boring, which is why I was shocked when the next words out of Tammie's mouth were that Michael had called her."Michael called you?" I repeated, certain that I h
MichaelI had been keeping myself busy, so I wouldn't wait for my phone to ring. I could have asked for Jade's number and called her myself but asking her to call me had been a test. I knew that she would call me eventually, and her state would let me know whether she was hiding something or not. When she had finally called, and I had asked her to come over, she had agreed. I was about ninety percent sure that the boy was mine now, or why else would she be on her way here? She could have told me to fuck off or not even called me at all.This was a terrible mess,and I didn't know how to handle it yet. Suspecting was one thing, but now there was a part of me that believed it too. My younger self's actions were coming to haunt me now, and I had never imagined that I would find myself in this situation. How did one suddenly become a father to a six-year-old? How was I supposed to reintroduce myself to the little boy as the father who hadn't been in his life for all these years? There were