Leo smiles at me, more grace on his lips than I deserve. "Just have Rex come over more and he can play with me. No problem!"Yes, no problem. It would be so easy to have Rex as the live-in playmate for my son. He'd be so willing to, I bet. "Oh... yes, well, when he's in town, I'm sure he'll always be happy to play with you.""Why can't he stay in town?"It must all be so simple in his head. So confusing that we don't follow logic. "Leo, honey, Rex lives in LA. We talked about this.""Yeah, but why can't he live here? Or we live there?"Leo doesn't know who Rex is, which is great for my sanity. He's going to totally flip when he finds out his father is famous. All in due time, though. "You know, mijo, Rex didn't even know about you until recently."Leo's eyes widen. "What?! But I'm his kid!"I laugh. "Yes, I know.""How could he not know?"I sigh. How am I going to make this make sense to a four-year-old? "You know how I grew you in my tummy?""Yeah...?""Well, Rex didn't know you were
Marisol jerked upward, back straightening, a gleeful smile on her face. “You, Rex –“ She emphasized the “x” at the end of his name. “In for a treat.”Rex smiled haplessly, not knowing what kind of treat to expect.With a pat to his cheek, Marisol got to her feet and went into the kitchen off the living room. Isabella could see her mother sorting through the tiny fridge, lighting the fire under her ass even more to get them out of this hovel as soon as she had the money to make a down payment on a house. A nice one.Rex removed his guitar and leaned it up against the couch before sliding to the ground to join Isabella. His bony knees knocked up against hers. “How am I doing?”Isabella checked her mother wasn’t looking and, when the coast was clear, gave him a soft kiss. “Fabuloso.”“Fa-bu-lo…” Rex began to repeat.Isabella kissed him again and then one more time before she got nervous her catholic mother would take a glance into the room. “God, you make me crazy.”“I hope that’s a good
Rex"Are you afraid of heights?" Leo asks me.I squeeze his hand tighter as we walk. "Can't be when you're as tall as me."Leo then looks up at Isabella who has him by the other hand. "Will I be that tall?""Maybe, mijo," she says, then gives me a sweet, glimmering look."You want some practice?" I ask.Leo nods excitedly. I scoop him up off the ground and tuck him onto my hip. He gasps with delight, clinging to my neck. "I'm so high up!"Isabella scoots into the spot Leo had beside me and wraps her hand around my bicep. "Careful with your..." Her other hand touches my midsection. It is an intimacy that feels like we've been together for years rather than days."I've done a lot more physical activity than this, Isabella," I say, raising my eyebrows. Because that's the truth. Any moment we get alone, we're usually contorting our bodies for pleasure. If something was going to ruin my recovery, it already would have happened.She bites on her tongue, smiling. "You're bad."Leo shoves his
"Keep your voice down, honey."Isabella's eyebrows jump. "Why not?!"Andrew heaves a sigh. "I mean, look around. Our kids would be tokens."I scan the party and sure enough, there are mostly white kids here. Whether they notice the difference or not, Leo and Viola have gravitated toward each other. They're not the only kids of color here, but they're definitely in the minority."I guess you could see it that way, but they deserve the same opportunities white kids do," Isabella says.Akira nods. "I totally agree. And I mean it's not just about representation based on race. There's only one gay parental unit."I hide my smirk. Parental unit. Lots of language I'm going to have to get used to."It's something to think about..." Isabella says. She runs her nails down the back of her neck, dipping her head down. Uneasy.I place my hand at the small of her back. A gesture that feels delicate and new, yet natural. When she looks up at me, warmth blooms across my chest. We could have already h
IsabellaI feel nothing and everything at once.The second I heard the words “world tour” I realized all my dreams would never be a reality.How dare he try to offer me forever when he didn’t have forever to give?It’s not that I expected him to give up his whole life and career for a life in Ocotillo. But we’re older now. Wiser. I thought maybe with his wild oats sowed there was a possibility we could make it work.I excused myself to the bathroom to do a bit of googling and sure enough, the first thing that came up about Rex was an article about the world tour set to kick off in three weeks.Three fucking weeks.How didn’t I know about this? Why didn’t he tell me?A relationship as new as this one (if you can call it a relationship) can’t withstand a massive nine-month world tour.I wasted about ten more minutes in the shiny marble bathroom looking at other search results, including pictures of the accident and a picture of us at the mall. A grainy photo, sure, but it’s us alright.
"Why? I'm going to be back. It's a few weeks on and a few weeks off. I'll come right back here. I'll be with you. And Leo."His hold on me is insistent. Too bad it's useless when I've already made up my mind."You keep the rings," Rex says and tries to shove them back in my hand. When I don't close my hand around them, he tries to squeeze my fingers into a ball. "Come on, Isabella.""Why would I keep them?""A promise. They're a promise. I'm coming back and when I do, we'll be together."The coil has nowhere else to go. I snap. "You'll always be coming back, Rex! You'll have to go on tour, you'll have to record an album, you'll have to go and go and go and it will never be enough for me."Rex's lower lip trembles. "You really won't let me even try to make it work?"He's not allowed to break down. Not when I'm so close to my own. "I won't hurt Leo by making him think that he'll have a life like all the other kids have.""You already have! He calls me 'Papa' and thinks we're together. Y
RexI stare at the party in front of me without seeing. Depravity. What else is new? Nothing I need to see. Not anymore. If I was tired of it before, now I’m downright exhausted by it.I balance my lowball glass of whisky on the arm of my chair, twist it carefully and try to discern if I could sneak out of this godforsaken hotel without anyone noticing me. There are the four of us from the band, a handful of girls, and then some of the crew. Maybe fifteen people in total. It’d be tricky but I could do it.“Lines!” a female voice shrieks in excitement.Across the room, a raven-haired woman with skin so pale I’m surprised I can’t see all her veins holds up a baggie of white stuff. Coke, obviously. I grimace as I watch her go about the business of pouring the powder onto the coffee table and forming the coke into tidy lines.I can thank Holden, our keyboardist, for her appearance tonight. Seraphina’s a groupie, which is surprising in this day and age that anyone takes the time to follow
I scrape my lower lip with my teeth and scan my bandmates. They're my best friends. We've been in this shit together since we were teens. We've slept on floors together, shared clothes, and survived on ramen just to fund our albums and tours.Now we have everything.Except... I have nothing."I'm not married," I say softly.Apollo's face drops. "I'm so sorry, dude. She didn't deserve you.""No, Apollo, I was never married."Everyone looks at me in confusion."Isabella and I... we met a long time ago. Last stop on our club tour before we signed with Interscope.""That's why you were in the desert..." Blaise says with a thoughtful laugh under his words.I nod. "It was just a fling. Except, when I had my accident, she ended up being the doctor to treat me and we reconnected and –" I scratch the back of my head. "Turns out I have a kid.""Oh shit," Seraphina peeps. Holden claps his hand over her mouth and she looks at him apologetically."Yeah, she's gonna need to sign an NDA or something