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Chapter Thirty-Six
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2024-12-18 15:09:39CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX
JEROME
I picked up the pack of Top Ramen and checked it out. I was unsure if it was something Nattie would like. She had called me and asked me to grab some cooking items for her at the mall.
When I got the call, I was unsure if it was something I was willing to do. Minus the fact that it was weird for her to call me at early hours of the day to ask me to shop for her and bring to her house, I was also not looking forward to leaving my bed for the whole day.
For The whole weekend, I had stayed indoors, rotting and feeling even more sorry for my present life. The only productive thing I had done was get my laptop and make corrections to my script, have a video call with Mum and Dad so they believed I was okay and called Dylan too to talk about random stuff like what car his professor brought to school last week. But now that I’m thinking about it, the
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STACYLife was funny and I also believed life liked to make jokes out of us, out of me, so that my life could be entirely funny. I felt like a joke. A sorry excuse of a joke.On Saturday, I was going to this party to have fun and hopefully, grow on whatever Max and I had. Who would have believed that a few days later, he would be telling me that our kiss meant nothing to him.It was so funny. The highest charting joke of the century because that kiss didn’t even feel like anything to me. I wanted it to be something. I tried my utmost best, God knows I did but when he kissed me, I wanted him to step back immediately. I wanted to be in bed, curled up, maybe cuddling him, maybe cuddling my pillow hut I knew for a fact that I didn’t want to be there with him.Now I wished he didn’t even kiss me because no matter how I tried to look at it, how I tried to see it differently, it felt like I had been a fool. I had dreamt and buil
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JEROME“She looked okay.”I checked on Stacy again because the bartender’s words didn’t seem enough. Stacy looked disturbed, like she wanted him to leave her alone.One look at him and I knew I didn’t like him. Why did Stacy have to get herself into such a scene? Why did I have to protect her and still find a way to respect her?“And you are sure you told her to call you if she needs to leave.”“I did that too.”I sighed and drank from my cup. Since Stacy came in and I promised to take her home, I had stopped drinking anything intoxicating. My cup was now filled with just water, and I had been sipping it while watching form the corner of my eyes for everyone that dared look in her direction.She was the only lady in the club alone. Men were ogling at her skin, taking her clothes off with their eyes. It wasn’t comfortable for me to watch. I wondered how she could even be comfortable with
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STACYMy back touched the wall behind me, and I sucked in air for my lungs, seeing as it wasn’t getting enough at the moment. I didn’t care. It completely felt like oxygen was hidden somewhere behind his lips, somewhere in his mouth. I just had to keep going. I wanted to keep going so bad.This was magical. It was everything I dreamt about and more, everything max couldn’t give me.My tears had dried up, my throat had stopped fucking hurting and even the alcohol on my tongue tasted like strawberries when he tasted me, when he matted himself against me, curling and sucking, teeth clashing.I sighed against his lips and tilted my head, seeing stars in the darkness behind my eyelids.I could not believe this was happening, that I was kissing Jerome Lewin, that he had kissed me.It was what I had wanted all this while and finally getting it now reassured me that I wasn’t wrong.I thought of the first day we met, of how my hear
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JEROMEShe was showing visible signs of anger and frustration. She adjusted on the chair, then started tapping her fingers against the table and when she couldn’t hold it in anymore, she spat the question out.“Why can’t you ever be real with me?”“Because you don’t need me to.”“Urgh! What does that even mean?”“It means the less you know, the better for you.”She hissed loudly and moved again, turning away.Even when she wasn’t looking, when all I could see was her side profile, she was the most beautiful sight to behold. She brought the water to her lips and swallowed; face visibly drawn into a scowl.She was cute when she frowned, when she huffed and made a big deal. I liked her more when she was giggling, vibrating against my back, and laughing so close to me that her breath tickled my neck.If I said this to her, it would sound like a joke but really, it was a
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STACYJerome seized my waist as our lips crushed together and I loved how carnal he got when he wasn’t restraining. I wanted him to stop holding back, to stop feeling like he had an obligation to take care of me.It was beautiful when he moved like I was fragile glass but for now, I wanted to be his woman and nothing else. Knowing him, this night was probably never going to repeat itself and I wanted to have enough to look back on. I wanted tonight to be that night; I wanted him to be the one.“Don’t stop kissing me, Jerome. Please don’t stop.” I wove my fingers through his hair and pulled him down.Our noses ran along each other, his hands grabbing a handful of my clothes, my stomach crushed against his. Our tongues moved in unison, exploring one another, reaching for territories that opened up our hearts and our soul.Everything he did was driving me insane, everything he wasn’t doing yet was driving me insane.He
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JEROMELisa came around the next morning when she heard what happened. Stacy and I missed her first call because we were too stuck on each other’s bodies for the second time that morning, to get to the phone. This happened during the early hours of the morning.Stacy crossed the living room, dressed in just her orange shirt and nothing underneath it. I loved having her walk around my place like this. It was something I could get used to, her presence but it was something I wasn’t meant to get used to. It was something that was never going to happen again. At least, I had to make sure of it.Stacy picked up her phone and put Lisa on speaker.“You went to a club?” Lisa asked as soon as her voice came through. She was a mixture of offended and excited.Stacy glanced in my direction, and I shrugged. “I texted her last night that you were here.”“Yeah. That’s what happens when you let your best friend go talk
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STACYI did feel new, everything about today and every day after the night I spent with Jerome made me feel new and maybe I wouldn’t have thought about it until Lisa had pointed out in his living room that something about me had changed.On one side, I felt confident, I strutted with my nose in the air, back straight, and chin up. No one could make me feel less than myself in these moments and I hoped to God that it continued to stay that way for a very long time. On the other hand, I felt like everyone could see all the times that my mind dragged back an image from the past.I would feel those shifts so well, would feel my body softly vibrate when I remembered the feeling of him and me, the feeling of us and it was so powerful, so close to being real that I feared everyone else felt it or at least saw me feel it.All the times my cheeks turned red, all the times I had to bite my tongue and focus on someone’s face, voice, hands, hoping that they wou
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JEROME“Fridays are good but you’re a college student, you want to have your Friday evenings to yourself.”She sighed, nodding subtly. “I mean, I wouldn’t mind spending my Fridays with you if we will be alone.”“Sta—”“I’m just saying,” she added, lifting her shoulders and shrugging it away.“Fridays are off the list. I like Monday, Wednesday and… pick the last day yourself.”Stacy thought for a long moment. We were trying to create a schedule around the days we would be meeting up. She had asked me about Nattie, and I tried to keep the answers minimal, to give away nothing while also making sure I wouldn’t hurt her.It was hard to read her thoughts. I couldn’t tell if she didn’t care or if she was angry that I gave her nothing. After I had slammed the question away without an okay answer, she didn’t go back to it.Now we were t
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STACYWe touched down in Ohio some minutes ago, found our luggage and went in search for Lisa’s Mun who was waving at us with a bright smile and a placard that read, COLLEGE STARS.It was so embarrassing and if I didn’t have anyone to drive me to the city, I would have ditched Lies there and then.Sitting in the backseat of Lisa’s mom’s car, I stared out the window, watching as the city passed by in a blur. It was strange being back home, like slipping into a familiar jacket that somehow didn’t fit quite right anymore. Lisa was in the front passenger seat, rummaging through her Mum’s bag.I Could almost still sense Jerome sitting beside me. Almost.The more we drove into the city, the further everything that happened before felt like a dream. The affair between me and Jerome, the fallout with Lisa, the endless exams—it all felt like a dream now, like something that had happened to someone else.
