'Empty' - the only word to describe what I was feeling. More than a week had passed since I last saw Rai and Damian. My place felt empty. Usually, Damian would make me laugh, and Rai would love me, but now I was all alone. This really saddened me. I missed them. I missed being around them. I missed being held by Rai.. To be loved by him.. To see his gentle smile.. To see his loving gaze.. I missed Rai so much that I couldn’t stop thinking about him. At that moment, I realized I really did love Rai more than Damian. All this time, I thought I was just forcing myself to believe that I loved Rai more than Damian out of guilt, but that wasn’t the case. While being alone, I thought about Rai way more than I thought about Damian. I wanted to be with Rai more than anything in the world. But how could I face him after what happened? I didn’t know what to do. All I knew was that I missed him so much that it hurt. While thinking about Rai, suddenly I heard a knock on my door. I was about to
Rai looked at me with amusement as I asked him that question. He reached out to tuck my hair behind my ear and shook his head while saying, "He loves me.. And I love him too.. But we are definitely not in love with each other." "Ohh.. Is he a bisexual then?" I asked Rai. I wanted to know even if the answer would hurt me. Thinking of Damian doing it with another person - female or male, would hurt. "No, Princess. He's far from it.. He hates.." Rai said but clamped his mouth again before finishing his sentence. Damian hates..? He wouldn't hate sex; he loves it.. At least it looked like he loved it when he was with me. So, what would Damian hate? Why does Damian have so many secrets? "In regard to your question why we don't feel disturbed by what we did.. Well.. It would be difficult if he isn’t my best friend, but we are best friends. We’ve talked about it and just called it ‘experiment’, and we laughed it off. Of course, we swore to never talk about it.. EVER!” He chuckled, pullin
We reached Damian’s place and Rai opened the main door. I stepped inside and saw Damian sitting on the sofa watching tv, as usual. He didn’t look up until Rai told him that I was here. “Damian, I brought princess home with me,” Rai told him. Damian turned his head toward us and stood up fast. I saw Leah in his hand. I’d missed Leah. I reached out my hands to take Leah, but instead of handling Leah to me, he handed Leah to Rai and pulled me forcefully toward him. “Kat, Baby girl.. I’ve missed you so much,” he said as he held me tight, nearly crushing my tiny body. “I’ve missed you too, Damian,” I told him, hugging him back. “Baby girl, I think we all need to talk,” Damian said as he pulled me along to the sofa. Rai followed closely behind. I sat on my usual seat, in the middle of the long sofa, and waited for them to sit beside me as always. But instead of taking their usual spots, they sat on the single sofas in front of me. “Kat, baby girl. I’m so sorry. I was so drunk. I shou
A few days later, while we were having lunch, with me sitting beside Rai and Damian sitting in front of me, Nat suddenly appeared. “Afternoon, guys. Hi, Kat,” Nat said as she came to me to brush her cheek against mine. “Hi, Nat,” I said back to her. She then went to sit on Rai’s lap and kissed his cheek. “Oohh.. French fries..” she said as she picked a french fries from Rai’s plate and ate it. She then planted a soundly kiss on Rai’s cheek, making Rai laugh while wiping the grease away from his cheek. I didn’t feel comfortable with Nat sitting on Rai’s lap, hugging him, and kissing him. I knew they were cousins, but still, I wouldn’t say I liked it. Yes, I was the type of girlfriend who got jealous easily, quite possessive if I might say so. It used to be so bad, but with age, it had gotten better, but still quite possessive. “Ummm, Nat.. Can you not sit on Rai’s lap?” I requested, embarrassed at myself for having to say that. Nat and Rai looked at me. “Sure, Kat. Sorry for th
“Shut up,” he said after pulling away, his eyes twinkling. I just laughed at him. “I want to see more pictures too, Nat.” I grinned at her. Nat looked at the three of us suspiciously but let it go. We all looked back at the tv screen and saw a portrait of the three of us, Rai and Damian, kissing my neck. My expression was like the first photo of me alone, shocked yet lustful. “Kat, you are a submissive, aren’t you? Personally, I wouldn’t be able to look that good with that expression. But I think that’s your best expression.” She grinned at me again. “What do you think? You guys should try dominating her.” She laughed while looking at both Rai and Damian. The three of us looked at each other, and I burst out laughing while Rai and Damian stayed quiet. “I’m not as good as Rai at being a submissive.” I managed to say while still laughing. “Rai is a submissive?” Nat raised an eyebrow at me. “Yeah. To Da..” As I was about to say his name, Damian grabbed my arm and pulled my body
The shopping was different this time. Damian didn't come with us, and Rai was not looking for something for himself. Rather, he was looking for something for me. Rai asked me to try on clothes, bags, pieces of jewelry, and everything else. As usual, I declined. I didn’t want him to spend so much money on me. “Rai.. You know I don’t want you to waste your money on me. It’s your hard-earned money. And you know I don’t like it when you buy me things. I don’t feel good about it,” I, at last, told him as we waited for our lunch. “Princess.. Me spending money on you will never be a waste. How can you think it’ll be a waste? You are my girlfriend. I want to make you happy,” he replied. “I don’t know, Rai. I feel like I don’t deserve it. I never feel good whenever guys buy me things,” I told him again, wanting him to understand. “I’m not some guy, Princess. I’m your prince charming. I love you. I don’t have anyone else to spend my money on. I want to give you as many pretty things as I c
That night, as we lay down on the bed, I realized that I had never apologized to Rai. I had to apologize for everything that happened between Damian and me. I wanted him to know how sorry I was, even though my apology was a bit late than it should’ve been. I should’ve apologized to him after he saw me with Damian, but there were just too many things happening after that, and I was still unsure how I felt about them. But now, as I had made up my mind, I needed to apologize to him. “Rai..” I started saying. “Yes, Princess?” He asked as he caressed my hair. “Rai.. I’m so sorry. I know that I should’ve said this sooner. I’m so sorry for everything that happened between Damian and me. I’m sorry that I thought I was in love with him. I love you, Rai. I love you.. Way more than I love Damian. Please forgive me. I don’t think I can live if you don’t forgive me. So please, Rai, forgive me. I promise it won’t happen again. Please believe me, Rai,” I pleaded to him, not able to look him in th
The rest of the week went by with no incidents. Rai didn't let me go whatever we did. We became romantic again, even way more romantic than before he went back to the US. Damian sometimes looked at us with jealousy, but he quickly looked away in case Rai noticed. But when Rai wasn't looking, he looked at me longingly. Other than that, the relationships between the three of us were exactly the same as usual. The first incident occurred one night while we were having dinner. Damian was joking around with me, while Rai was quiet, quieter than the usual Rai. He didn't even really eat his dinner; he was just moving it around. I noticed and asked, “Rai, are you okay? You haven't touched your dinner yet.” Rai looked at me, smiled, and said he didn’t feel like eating. That was when blood came out of his nose, a lot of it. “Rai, you have a nosebleed!” I was frantic, going to his