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Chapter 78
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2024-10-29 19:42:56For days on end, I felt like my body and mind were entirely numb. How could I have been so stupid?
I thought that the hardest part would be giving up the child, yet I had managed to completely overlook the actual possibility of death. It sounded so medieval, dying in childbirth. I knew it still happened today, but I somehow thought it wouldn’t be me.
I watched Clara run by me, closely followed by Kiara. I thought I was doing it all for her, but what would even happen to her if I died? Would she go back to Max? Legally she would have to, but the thought alone broke my heart.
I looked back down at my phone. Obviously I had been googling the condition non stop, obviously it did nothing to help my numbness. The baby could cause internal bleeding, meaning an emergency c-section that the baby would most
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Robert’s povI looked up at the ceiling. It was a joke really. I pay all this money to have a functional and good looking home, yet when I need it to be a home, all I look at is that ugly grey ceiling. I couldn’t even be bothered to change it. What could I even put up there?With the thoughts of having my ceilings painted like they were the sistine chapel, I got out of bed. It had been another restless night, with nothing to distract my thoughts. I looked over to the other side of the bed, remembering how just a few weeks ago Dalia had laid there, complaining that I always got up so early.It was the life of insomniacs, I thought to myself as I hopped in the shower. We need sleep, but we never get it. Instead we are faced with hours upon hours of thinking time. When I was a teen
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I’ll call you when I need you.It might have been one of the worst things he has said to me. Not only did it shatter my trust, it made me feel like a proper idiot. To make matters worse, somehow I still wanted every text I received to be from him.I laid in my bed, staring up at the ceiling. Kiara was taking care of the girls in the living room. I could hear the sounds of the Lion King, Clara’s favourite movie, from here. It had been two whole weeks since that call, two whole weeks where every kick from the baby made me equally happy and sad.A new song started playing in the living room, closely followed by Kiara and Clara singing along to it. I owe her a lot of baby sitting after I give birth, assuming I don’t die, as Kiara was here every day now. Sometimes I helped her take pictures
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The car ride was far slower than I had hoped it to be. The sun was slowly starting to dip behind the horizon, painting the skies pink and orange. I wanted the beautiful colours to take my mind away from the whirlwind of emotions inside me. Sadly for me, they were just colours.Somehow, somewhere along the way I had fallen in love with him. I had started to think of us as an actual couple, not just a fake one. It was the one thing I never thought would happen, I thought I could just turn my emotions off as always and deliver this baby to get the money. To make matters worse, I knew Robert would never love me back.I forced myself to take a deep breath as we pulled up to the front gate. I needed to keep my calm, too much stress might make matters worse with the baby’s health. The dark green dress I had chosen to wear fitted tightly around my body, hug
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Robert glanced over to me every other minute, it did absolutely nothing to calm my nerves which were flaring up inside of me.“I am fine.” I eventually snapped at him. “Stop looking.”He didn’t reply to it and instead grabbed his phone and started going through his emails. We were in the back of an expensive Rolls Royce, I didn’t even know Robert likes expensive cars. Though he is a billionaire, so it’s not that big of a surprise. We needed something to make a big entrance in and this car was definitely nothing but an eye catcher.Robert wore a black suit, with a dark blue tie. My dress was the exact same shade of navy blue. It was a satin dress that hugged tightly around my body and showed off my bump. I had even been given a blinged out diamond choker and diamond ear
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There was a little rest area before heading into the art exhibit. When this place was open to their regular art loving crowd, this would simply be the entrance hall. There were already some tables with food and drinks, as well as some chairs to sit down on. I spotted the singer taking off her heels and changing them to flats. She smiled kindly when she spotted me staring at her. I didn’t really know how to respond, so I just simply smiled back at her. Robert ‘parked’ me on an empty chair and grabbed some water and food for me. I hadn’t felt any of the pains luckily, but I sure as hell did not have the stamina to stand for this long anymore either. My feet were already swollen and hurting, and the night had only just begun.“Thank you.” I gladly accepted the drink from Robert. “Any pain?” He whispered. I shook my head. “Just my feet, nothing bad.” I told him. We stayed in that hall for a little bit so
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“Oh for fucks sake.” I cursed, tiredly rubbing my temples. “Why can nothing ever go drama free for me?”I knew Liann’s family was rich, I knew that they were from around here. I vaguely remember her telling me her great grandfather invented some everyday item, and her grandfather and father just reinvested the money in startups and real estate. I would have never made the connection to what Robert had told me about Dennis Wright, I hadn’t even really bothered to google him. Maybe that was naive of me, I surely did curse myself for it now.“You know him?” Robert asked me, his eyes switching between me and Dennis. “He is Liann’s uncle,” I told him. Robert clearly didn’t remember who Liann was, so I quickly elaborated. “She is my sister in law. The demon.”“That didn’t come up on your background check.” Robert said. I couldn’t blame him for that comment. Him
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Robert’s marketing team was very happy with our outing to the art exhibit. The following day I saw pictures come by of us on the red carpet, as well as the photos that were taken when I was fangirling over art. The latter really did turn out great. I was pointing at the art and clearly talking, while Robert was looking at me, with a small smile on his face. The art exhibit used them to show how interesting their art was, the gossip magazines used them to show how Robert was in love with me. It was a win-win.I didn’t feel any pain, besides the regular pregnancy ones, after the party and it was making me a bit bolder. I still kept to mostly resting, but I wasn’t putting off things until after the birth anymore either. Sure, it was still six days of rest and then one appointment on the seventh day, but it was more than what I did before.Back when I first moved into this apartment I had already bought a coffee machine. Pregnant women really weren’t su
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Doctor Ward was always in a much better mood when Robert wasn’t here for my appointments. He even wore a funky tie today, with little green dinosaurs on them. Clara would love him, that’s for sure.“No pain,” I confirmed for him. “Outside of my back and my feet, of course.”He nodded and wrote it down, though I knew he must already know about all of this. I was still on a decently strict schedule to tell doctor Ward everything I felt in regards to the pregnancy. I think most of my messages never made it past the nurse, but they must be in my file at the very least.“We are slowly heading towards your due date.” Doctor Ward said as he was writing. “Nervous?”“Well, the possibility of horrible pain and death doesn’t really make me look forward to it.” I joked. Doctor Ward smiled and finished writing his sentence before putting the clipboard down. We were in the oh so familiar examination
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Clara had never been one for lullabies, she preferred bedtime stories even before she could understand what the stories were about. Flynn was the opposite in this. If you spoke to him, he cried, but if you sang to him he would fall asleep.I finished the third Disney song, all three coming straight out of Tangled because I lacked originality, and stayed for a few more moments to watch if he wasn’t actually faking me out and was still awake. Not that I minded whatsoever, I could look at him every minute for the rest of my life and never get bored.His chest rose and fell, his face all scrunched up to deal with whatever dreams he was having. He had taken to Robert’s old crib like it had been his own for years already. He was only a few weeks old and already smart enough to know that he should not fight his father on this. God, this baby is going
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“Drive slowly.” Robert warned him. “Or face her wrath.” The driver smiled politely at the joke, probably not realizing how much truth there was in it and that it wasn’t a joke whatsoever. The baby and I were finally both cleared to go home, but that did not mean that I was feeling fine and dandy again. I had a big c-section scar on my lower stomach, one that would surely turn into an ugly scar later on. The doctors had encouraged walking and moving around far quicker than I really wanted to. I could walk out of the hospital myself, but at a slow pace. After placing the baby carrier in the car, Robert helped me sit down. I felt like I was eighty years old with how much help I needed with everything, but Robert never once complained about it. I must have really scared him with the whole ‘my heart stopped beating’ moment in the operation room. He was never
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In books and movies, they always depicted unconsciousness as this great dark abyss. Like it was a black hole with me floating around in the middle. I thought it would be similar to being underwater, floating around like I was weightless and free. But as always, the books and movies were wrong. They gave me the false hope that I would receive some sort of tranquil experience in the middle of this chaos. In reality, it felt like I blinked. I remembered looking up at the bright white surgical lights with plenty of doctors by my side. I couldn’t feel anything, even if I did see the occasional blood soaked gauze come by. It didn’t register that that blood was mine. The room was spinning, until I finally heard my final call to let go. I heard the sharp cry of my baby, my first born. I allowed myself to close my eyes. I wasn’t allowed to rest for long. T
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Robert POVThe night my child was born happened in heartbeats.The first beat, I was at home. Dalia and I had a fight, even though I knew we shouldn’t have. She was important to me, but my child’s safety was at stake. We both knew it was just weeks of frustration and worry building up and overflowing. Tomorrow I would go back and we would make up again, and I would sit through another day of complaints and silence.I was reading Clara a new book. Dalia had reread the same ones to her a million times, so in her absence I decided to outshine her and buy the young girl some new ones. Tonight she wanted to hear about farm animals going on an adventure, even though she had already heard it last night. I wasn’t in the mood for another argument, so we got to reading.
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Sleeping was so difficult. My mind was in turmoil, my body was in constant pain. I could never get comfortable enough to fall asleep and even if I did, one kick from the baby caused sharp pains to wake me right back up again. I thought that was what had happened when I woke up again. I opened my eyes and tried to turn a bit to the right to get comfortable again. That was really all I did these days, slight adjustments in the hope that it would be enough to fall asleep again. I had been in quite a deep sleep for once and I wanted to return to it, but something else was bothering me this time. My mind was half asleep so it took me some time to figure out that I could hear some sort of obnoxious beeping, and then even more time to realize that the beeping wasn’t coming from any of the neighbouring rooms, it was coming from the machine next to me.&nbs
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I stared up at the grey ceiling. And then I stared some more. The pain was pounding through my body and it felt like it had been months since I had last been able to rest comfortably. Any movement made it worse, laying still did nothing to fix it. I just wanted it all to be over already, nothing could cheer me up anymore. Robert placed a kiss on my lips, but I wanted to slap him. It was his fault I was in this position anyway. If he hadn’t wanted a baby, then I wouldn’t be pregnant, then I wouldn’t be in this much pain. It was all his fault, not mine. “Doctor Ward is coming this afternoon.” Robert said when I didn’t respond much to his kiss. It had been a few days since Mr Price’s visit and Mahlia had confirmed that the FBI case against Robert
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The pain never really went away. Though the doctors reassured us, and with us I mean mostly Robert, that both the baby and I were safe, it still did not make for a very comfortable stay. I was either high as hell on pain meds, or cranky because of the pain. It was very much taking a toll on my psyche, and then being told that I would need to stay here until I gave birth only made everything seem worse. “There is no need really,” I said. “Nothing exciting is happening, and Robert is constantly watching me like a hawk. Honestly, I never even have a moment to myself anymore.” Robert smiled at me and flipped me off, while I heard my brother laugh. In the spirit of our renewed relationship, I figured that I should probably tell him I had been hospitalized. He was luckily not brave enough to ask if he should take care of Clara, because that was really not a decisio
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Robert POVThe examination room was more spacious than I had expected it to be. It clearly was designed for a pregnant mother who needed to bring her child along, as it featured both a bed with stirrups and a small play area for the child. The doctor’s chair was now occupied by a woman with light blonde hair and a windbreaker jacket that read ‘Child Services’, while Clara was in the play area, but touching nothing. Her head snapped to the door when I walked in. Her big eyes welled up with tears and she got up from the floor. She didn’t dare run to me, as she would run to Dalia. Instead, she hesitated, waiting for me to make the first move. I got down on my knees and opened my arms for her. She realized it was okay and ran to me. She was clearly in hysterics, her eyes were red from crying and rubbing her eyes so often and her hair was half in a ponytail, half like she had been in a tropical hurricane. She only cried more when she hugged me. I
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My mind was broken into a thousand pieces. I could usually be calm and collected in the face of stress but now I can barely will my legs to move. “The driver will be here in five minutes.” Steph said to me. “Too late,” I responded. “I will drive myself.” Steph nodded and turned back to her own desk to continue working from there. I was almost at the end of the hallway when I forced myself to stop and turn back.“Steph?” I said. She looked up from her desk, as calm and professional as ever. “I am leaving you in charge. Dalia is my priority right now.”“Yes sir.” She answered and went right to it while I headed for the elevator. The truth was that even in a building filled with Harvard educated lawyers and the best business people in the world, the only person I would entrust my life’s work to was Steph. She knew how I ran it, she knew my vision for it and most of all: She was fie
