(Piper POV)
“Piper, you can talk to me,” Dr. Eggert said softly.
I shook my head as I continued to stare out the window. “No.”
“Anything that you say in this room is confidential,” she reminded me.
“Even from Alpha and the werewolf council?”
“Even from them. They have taken blood oaths to ensure it, and I have taken a blood oath in return.”
“Just for me?”
“No, we have a blanket oath that applies to everyone. Therapy would not work without confidentiality.”
I turned and looked at the middle-aged woman sitting in the chair across from mine. She seemed sincere, and she seemed nice enough, but I was on the fence about whether I could trust her. Or anyone.
“Why am I here, Dr. Eggert?” I asked.
“You attacked a gamma wolf, Piper. Completely unprovoked. You are lucky that he was not badly hurt, and you are even luckier that Luna Lily intervened and the werewolf council decided to take pity on you. Your punishment could have been far worse.”
I scoffed. “Pity? Is that what they call it?”
“What would you call it?”
“I don’t know, but I would call it anything but pity. Maybe forcing me into therapy is just an attempt to make me seem crazy.”
“Are you?”
I took a deep breath. I silently wondered what kind of therapist asks a patient to diagnose themselves. Perhaps Dr. Eggert should be the one sitting on this couch while I hold the white notepad and stare at her judgmentally.
“Piper? Do you think you are crazy?” Dr. Eggert repeated.
I groaned. It was a stupid question, but it seemed harmless enough. I decided that I might as well answer and get this d&mn thing over with.
“I don’t know. Maybe. Some days I feel like I am,” I admitted. “But really, I think I just have a lot of things that I am dealing with.”
“The council is really worried, Piper. And when I talked to your pack members about you, they said that you have seemed really stressed lately.”
I let out a sarcastic laugh. “Stressed? Yeah, I guess you could say that.”
Dr. Eggert frowned.
“Piper, what is going on? I think it will help you to talk about it.”
I reached under the collar of my shirt and pulled out the silver locket tucked inside. I rubbed my thumb against it, seeking the slight comfort that it usually brought me.
“That is a pretty locket,” Dr. Eggert commented.
“Thank you.”
“Where did you get it?”
“My mother gave it to me before she died.”
“Is that why you have been stressed?”
“No. She died before I came to Moon Shadow Pack.”
“Were you close to your mom?”
“Yes, very. She always knew what to say and what to do and how to help me. I feel lost without her.”
“How long ago did she pass away?”
“About four years ago, when I was 18.”
“That is awfully young to lose a parent.”
“Yes.”
“Do you think your mom would want you to talk to me?”
I ran my hands through my hair.
“I don’t know. It would depend on whether she trusted you.”
“Do you trust me?”
“I trust no one. Not anymore.”
“That can’t feel good.”
“It feels better than trusting someone and then getting hurt.”
Silence settled between us while Dr. Eggert tried to find yet another way to approach me.
“Piper, I have been treating patients for a very long time. I can tell that you are hurting. The hurt is not going to go away on its own. You need to talk about it.”
I sighed. Despite everything, I wanted to talk about it. I just didn’t know how.
“I am scared to talk about it,” I confessed.
“Why?”
“Because everyone who has ever tried to help me has either hurt me or gotten hurt. And….”
“And what, Piper?”
“What if I talk about it and you can’t help me? What if you tell me that there is nothing that we can do to fix it? That this is my life and I just have to get used to it being this way? I don’t think I can bear to hear you say that, because that would take away any shred of hope I have left for a different future.”
“So you still have hope?”
I felt a tear run down my cheek. “No. Yes. I don’t know.”
Dr. Eggert reached over and grabbed my hand, giving it a gentle squeeze.
“I am not one to give up, Piper. If I do not have a solution today, I will try again tomorrow. And then the day after that. And the day after that. And every day until we find a solution. With your permission, and only with your permission, I will get every expert and professional needed to help with your case. Luna Lily and Dr. Hyder have already guaranteed me those resources. But I cannot help you if I do not know what is going on.”
“Why do they care so much? I am just an omega.”
Dr. Eggert gave me a knowing smile. “Lesson number one, Piper. You can lie to others, but you cannot lie to me. In this room, I cannot force you to tell me anything, but I can absolutely demand that anything that you tell me is the truth.”
“Meaning?”
“I know very well that you are not ‘just’ an omega.”
I looked up at Dr. Eggert, studying her eyes. Although she was actively calling me out for lying to her, there was something comforting about the way she looked at me. The look in her eyes vaguely reminded me of my mother.
I desperately wanted to believe her, and I wanted to trust her. But could I?
“What do you have to lose?” my wolf asked me in our link. “We have tried everything else. We are running out of options.”
“Is she telling the truth about the blood oath?” I linked back.
“Yes. She cannot tell anyone what we tell her.”
I took another deep breath and looked down at my hands.
“Have you ever been betrayed, Dr. Eggert?”
Dr. Eggert gave me a sad smile. “I am sure everyone has, in some way.”
“Have you ever felt the betrayal pains?” I asked next.
Dr. Eggert’s eyes widened just a little bit as she started to realize where my story was headed.
“Have you been experiencing betrayal pains?” she questioned.
“Yes. For two years. But that isn’t the worst part.”
“What is?”
“I don’t know who my mate is. My wolf is slowly dying because of the pain, and yet I do not know how to stop it because I don’t even know who my f&&king mate is or even what pack he is from.”
“Piper, I am not a medical doctor, but I don’t think that is ---"
“Possible? Yeah, I didn’t think so either. But here I am. I don’t know why it is happening, but it is. I have a few theories, but there are still some pieces that I do not understand.”
“Are you sure that you are having betrayal pains? Could it be ----”
“—something else? Hallucinations? Phantom pains?”
“Yes. Those are not unheard of.”
I pulled up the left sleeve of my hoodie, revealing the black and blue bruises up and down my arm. “Do hallucinations cause these?”
Dr. Eggert looked at my arm. I saw a flash of horror run through her eyes. Betrayal pains do not typically leave marks, but they do if the pains occur often enough over a long period of time.
“Before you ask, the bruises are not self-inflicted. If you want proof, I can pull up the back of my shirt. There are bruises on my back in places that I cannot reach. And I am a lot of things, Dr. Eggert. But self-harm has never been my thing.”
“Why don’t you start from the beginning, Piper. Tell me everything.”
Fine, whatever. She really wants to know? I’ll tell her. I just hope that she is prepared.
“It started a little over four years ago….”
****
(Approximately Four Years Ago)(Piper POV)I am currently waiting in a dressing room on the fourth floor of the packhouse, studying my reflection in the full-length mirror. My hair and makeup have been done expertly, and my white wedding dress hugs my curves in all the right places. Despite my insecurities, even I have to admit that I look beautiful.My fingers begin to trace the silver and diamond locket on my neck. I find myself desperately wishing that my mother was here with me.Through the open window, I can hear various voices from the wedding guests who are gathering in the courtyard below. I can also hear soft violin music playing, and I can smell the vibrant rose and lily arrangements that have been placed everywhere. And I can feel just a hint of the bright morning sun on my back.Unable to resist the temptation, I walk over to the window and peer outside. Like a magnet, my eyes land on Leo Bloodstone, who is greeting guests. He is tall, super muscular, with dark hair
(Xander POV) My heart was pounding. We were doing this. We were really doing this. The alpha in me was excited, but the man in me was worried. I have never defied my father like this before, and Leo Bloodstone was not someone that I normally wanted to piss off. However, in this case, the risk was worth it. Piper was worth it. I just prayed that my plan worked. Piper quickly changed into leggings and a hoodie while I sprayed myself with a de-scenting spray. We then grabbed our backpacks —which I also brought with me— and left the room. After saying a quick prayer to the Moon Goddess and making sure that the coast was clear, Piper and I made our way downstairs. We “hid” Piper’s wedding dress behind a bush near the side exit, and I threw her high heels as far as I could into the field. Our goal was to make it look like Piper fled across the meadow towards human territory. That would be the fastest, most logical exit route. Once Piper’s dress was fake-hidden, it was Piper
(Leo Bloodstone POV)My bride has been missing for over five hours. And it has been exactly 4 hours, 15 minutes since anyone bothered to inform me.I do not know what I am angrier about: that this stupid pack allowed her to escape; that they wasted 45 minutes making excuses for her delay coming down for the wedding that we could have used looking for her; or that their trackers are so incompetent that they spent the first half of their search following the fake trail Piper left with her “hidden” wedding dress and heels. The Blue Ridge trackers would probably still be following that trail had my men not pointed out their stupidity. Thankfully, my men are well trained. They immediately noticed that Piper's scent did not carry through the meadow, meaning that although her shoes may have been there, Piper herself never walked through.At this point, my wolf is ready to murder everyone in sight. It is a small miracle that I have been able to prevent him from doing so. As it is, both
(Almost Two Years Later) (Piper POV) It was currently nine-thirty at night. I was alone in my room in the basement, and after working all day, I felt completely exhausted. Nevertheless, I had something important that I had to do before I went to bed. I placed a single candle into a chocolate chip cookie that I had stolen from the packhouse kitchen. I lit the candle and began softly singing, hoping to avoid anyone hearing me. “Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday dear Daddy. Happy birthday to you.” Smiling sadly, I blew out the candle and made a wish. It was not just any wish… it was my only wish. The same wish that I made every single time I celebrated the birthday of someone that I left behind: that the Moon Goddess would continue to look after everyone that I cared about at Blue Ridge, and that she would allow me to see them again soon. So far, my wish had yet to come true, but I continued to hold out hope. I had to. Hope —however waning— was
(Xander POV)I miss Piper. I miss her so d&mn much it practically hurts. I miss her laugh. I miss her smile. I miss the way that we used to spend hours talking about anything and everything. I even miss the silly practical jokes that she used to pull on me.She was my best friend. My partner in crime. My everything. Well, almost everything. We never kissed much less had sex. Our fathers would have killed us if we even thought about doing that with each other. That does not mean I never thought about going for it anyway, but the timing was never right. Sadly, it still isn’t. Not yet.Sometimes it is hard to believe that Piper left Blue Ridge Pack 1 year, 11 months, 2 weeks, 4 days, and 49 minutes ago. Other times, I miss her so much that it feels like an entire lifetime has passed. Well, a lifetime and 49 minutes. 50 minutes now. Yes, I have been counting every single minute since she ran away.When I helped Piper leave, I was sure that it would only be for a little wh
(Present Day)(Piper POV)While Dr. Eggert continues to watch me, I get up and walk to the window. I stare at the wolves who are busy down below, and I secretly wish that I was among them. Or, at the very least, that I was anywhere but here.Therapy is about facing your demons. As much as I want to save my wolf, I am not sure that I am ready to do that. Four years ago, I would have done it gladly. But now? Now too much has happened. I do not know if I am strong enough to face my demons anymore. Nor do I know if it is even worth it to try. If I tell Dr. Eggert everything, and she tells me that there is nothing that can be done… that losing Penelope and experiencing the betrayal pains are punishment for my misdeeds… it will take away whatever remaining shreds of hope I have away. “Piper?” Dr. Eggert asks, breaking me out of my trance.“Yes?”“Where did you go?”“Just lost in thought.”“What were you thinking about?”“Different things.”“That’s not very descriptive.”“No, it’s
(Dr. Eggert POV) Piper and I end up talking for another several hours. I originally thought that her confession about sleeping with Leo Bloodstone was a major breakthrough, but like everything with Piper, the story was not as simple as it appeared to be. It took a lot of additional work, a lot of tears, and a healthy amount of sorting through Piper-style sarcasm before I finally got what I thought was the full picture about what Piper has been going through and why she did what she did. By the point that Piper had finally spilled everything, Piper and I were huddled next to each other on the floor. Both of us were crying… although as a professional I am embarrassed to admit it. This is the first time in my career that I have ever felt this invested in a patient. I do not know what it is about Piper that I connect with, or how —as a patient— she seems to see right through me as though she knows the secrets I have hidden. Nor do I understand what it is that makes her so differe
(FLASHBACK) (Day before the one-year anniversary of Piper running away) (Piper POV) It was 8:00 at night. I had just finished helping with dinner service, and I was eager to get back to the book that I had been reading. Unfortunately, instead of reading the book, I found myself fighting with a friend who desperately wanted me to agree to go to a party with her. “Piper, come onnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn,” Maya pleaded with me. “Just agree to come with us tomorrow.” I looked at Maya and sighed. Moon Shadow’s alpha and beta had gone to a conference, and they had taken a large number of the warriors with them for security. That meant there was less work for the omegas to do at the packhouse. Less work meant fewer hours, and fewer hours meant that my friends were constantly itching to party and drink. I waived my hand dismissively. “I can’t. Someone has to stay and cook and clean for the warriors who stayed behind.” Maya gave me a look. “Sure, someone has to say, but why