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Chapter 21: Another Confession
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Mate or God? Chapter 20: She's Taken
ShawnI watch her for the third time leaving this town and me behind. I wanted to break the window and shift into my wolf form but I keep holding back myself. Jenna waved goodbye to me but I am too deep in my thoughts to even bother.Precisely I am hurt by her leaving me. Even if she is a nun now but still she is my fucking mate. The Jenna that I desperately want to be with. When the car left, my wolf let out a howl of agony and suddenly I feel dizzy. My head started to ache a lot that I fail to move but only to stumble back and fall on my bed. I lay flat down there without moving. The pain is too deep. It's keeping me paralyzed. I close my eyes and take a nap for a while. When I wake up again after a while I don't feel the dizziness anymore. I can move my body around. I remove my clothes then threw them in the laundry hamper and grab my towel.I turn on the shower letting it cool for a while. I step inside and feel the cold splash on my warm body. Relaxing every knot and muscle of
Mate or God? Chapter 22: Tell Tale
Jenna/Sr. Claire"Such a refreshing memory, right Jenna?" The man named Ambrose said and deviously smiles at me. "And that is why you are here today Jenna. Poor soul. Rejected by its only family and pack. The second option to her mate....oh poor Jenna. Can't imagine what you went through." He chuckles at me. No sympathy nor guilty or sadness is shown in his expression when saying those words but just a scornful face. The devil is mocking Jenna. I don't want to believe any of his words and I refuse to accept every piece of evidence they present before me. However, the bastard brought in an old poor woman. These people are true monsters with no respect or compassion for anyone. They are beyond saving. I can see it through Ambrose's eyes. At first, I thought I could change his mind but he never bothers to show any humanity in him. He and his followers are people I cannot be able to save because they are people whose minds are filled with nothing but pure darkness. "Oh shut up witch"
Mate or God? Chapter 23: Save Me
Jenna/Sr. Claire"I am not Jenna" I whispered still trying to deny the fact about me. "Take her away" order Ambrose. The two guards came inside and pull Lucia away from me. I shake my head no. I try to reach out for Lucia but Ambrose pushes me back to the ground. Lucia looked at me with tears in her eyes. She mouth 'I am sorry.'"Lucia" I try again but Ambrose intervenes and pushes me back. "You cannot go, Jenna. Unfortunately for you...you are to stay here until he comes" he said in a serious tone. "Jenna is not here" I deniable reply to him. "Jenna, even if you want to deny it. You are still that man's mate. Trust me, he will come for you and it's why I am patiently waiting for him," he yells at me. I laugh at that like a crazy maniac before letting out a shattering scream. "So, what if I was Jenna?" I glare at him. "What are you going to do about it?" "I want Shawn's head but I can't have that bastard's head if I don't have you." I let out another mockery laugh. These peopl
Mate or God? Chapter 24: Apologies
Jenna/Sr. ClaireSome people always said heaven is a paradise for everyone while others say not everyone will go there. I do believe both but if I have sinned a little would the door of heaven still be open for me after repenting in the purgatory. I think God will have mercy on my soul. Will he? I haven't killed anyone or do worse crimes than other people do but I know I have sinned. Blinking my eyes open the first thing I see is the ceiling. When I fell from the window down to the ground I knew God will save me. He saved me not to be in heaven but to live again in this world. I still have things that I need to face and mend before going peacefully to his heaven. I believe we all are given a chance. However, we always blew on those chances. I felt a hand on my hand which brought me out of my thoughts and then a gasp from someone. I turn to find the woman who gave birth to me looking at me with tears in her eyes. They are about to fall. "Jenna," she says with excitement. Standing
Mate or God? Chapter 25: Mistakes and Regret
ShawnThe truth was out and I can see that it has hurt Jenna deeply. I sit down on the bench at a park staring at a blank space before me. I feel like a sore loser with the way I sit here. Back in the room, I wanted to stay by her side when she told us off but I know that Jenna needed a space. It had been a week since she fell into a coma. I was excited to see her when her mother link us she was awake but I guess she wasn't so excited to see us. "Shawn she left" Hannah cry to me through the pack link. "I don't know where she runs off to" she added. "I will look for her," I told her and closed off the link. I stood up to go when I see Jenna running in my direction. This cannot be real, right? I try to slap myself as I watch her running towards me. I shake my head and take a step forward. "Jenna" I whisper waiting to welcome her in my now spread arms. "It-"She runs past me and straight to the riverside. She didn't see me. Am I invincible now? I thought the moon goddess is sending
Mate or God? Chapter 26: Sorry I love You
Jenna/Sr. ClaireThe last thing I remember before I fainted was Shawn holding me while I cry. God, why is it dark again here and why do I hear voices and not see faces? I question while trying so hard to open my eyes. I wanted to see but my eyelids are heavy. It's like I am imprisoned in my own mind. It's like I'm living in a nightmare and I wanted to escape from the darkness so bad. Therefore, I call out the name that I always knew would be here for me. God! I cry out. God! I called again while struggling to be free from the darkness that's about to consume me. "GOD!" I scream breaking away from the darkness. My eyes wide open, staring up at the ceiling. I sit bolt upright terrified by the darkness and thoughts of never seeing the light again. At the same time, I am heavily breathing. Once I am calm I try to reach up to touch my wet cheeks but something is pinning my hands down. "Hey, you're safe." I turn aside and find Colby with a relieved look on his face. I stare at him, no
Mate or God? Chapter 27: Going Crazy
Jenna/Sr. Claire"Forgive me, Lord." I kiss my cross tied to my necklace and place it in the top drawer. After another breakdown, I never bother to show my face at lunch or dinner. It is another day and I have been sitting here thinking of what to do until I made up my mind. And what I am going to do may sound crazy. However, for once I want to go crazy because I am going crazy of what had happened to me in the past. These people who claim to love, to know, and to say sorry to me are making me unstable again. I need to breathe. I need to live a little and just forget everything. I look at myself in the mirror once again. "This is it," I said to my reflection. Taking a deep breath I check my skinny jean, spaghetti top, and my two-inch heel. "It's time for Jenna to let loose" I mutter and grab my purse from the nightstand. I slowly close the door behind me and about to walk through the hallway way when a voice stops me. "You're going somewhere?" I turn to find Colby standing at the
Mate or God? Chapter 28: To Do List
Jenna/Sr. ClaireShawn left right after his promise, excusing himself that he has pack duties and I'm left with the kids. Despite that, we still enjoy our picnic even though it was kinda sad that Shawn missed out on the rest of the fun. Back to the pack house after our fun at the park. I sat in my room, thinking of his words before I get up and go to the shower. After a nice warm shower, I changed into a mid-knee floral 'skirt and a white tug-in blouse. I then put on pairs of white sneakers. I try to look for a pen and paper but I could not find it. I know one person I can get it from. Despite, not wanting to go but I have no option. I walk out of my room and head towards downstairs. I then turn right and made my way to Colby's office. When I reach it I knock on the door lightly. "Come in" I hear him from inside. The moment I open the door is the moment I regret coming here. Shawn, Hailey, and Hanna were all in Colby's office. They all look at me as if they saw a ghost. I clear my
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Mate or God? Bonus Chapter 2: Happily Ever After
Sr. Claire/ Jenna’s PovThe sound of waves crashing to the shore made me close my eyes and enjoy the breeze. I love this and I wish to enjoy this beautiful scene and moments forever. “Aunty” I smile upon hearing that sweet voice and turn back to see my nephew namely Wes waving at me. That kid has grown up so quick and I love to spoil him as he is my only nephew. He took both of his parents looks which is an excellent combination. "Aunty" he calls again and I wave at him, shaking my head casually. Today’s my vacation day and I decided to spend it with my family at the beach house like I did every year. We have been doing this practice every year during the warm summer season. I do not own the beach house as I don’t have money and yes, I finally have a family now apart from the nuns, my mother superior and the children at the orphanage.“Jenna” my mom hugs me to her side when she reaches me. I snap out of my thoughts and smile at her. It has been two months since I haven’t seen her
Mate or God? Bonus Chapter 1: Rewrite The Stars
(Slightly Mature)Hailey’s Pov“You know, sometimes you need to rest love,” I said to Colby as I rub my five-month pregnant stomach. It is nice to have another child on the way especially its the one I created with my loving mate. Colby looks up at me through his reading glasses. A smile broke on his face and he took them off, rubbing his eyes. He placed the reading glasses on the ledger in front of him and let out a long exhausting sigh.“I can’t do that,” he simply replies and slumps back to rest his head on the leather chair.Seeing him work so hard makes me worried all time. I always worried about his health. I slowly walk toward him and move to the back of his chair.I place my hands on his head. . “I know you have a lot on your plate and it’s your responsibility to do this but sometimes we all need to rest. You need to relax daddy.”I start to massage his head. Colby let out a groan.“Don’t start or you will get it baby” he warns me, making me smile even more and continue to ma
Mate or God? Epilogue
Our Theme song for the epilogue is "Always" by Yoon Mi Rae. Your author will always love you, my readers. So please 'unfollow my heart.'~~~Shawn's POVWe sat there silently waiting for her. It has been an hour since we'd waited outside of Lucia's Cabin. She linked us earlier today to come to her place as Jenna wanted to talk to us. Nervously my right leg bounces up and down with my sweaty hands rubbing against my jean. Mrs. Harrison reached out and takes my hand into hers. "It's going to be alright," she whispers to me in a very comforting tone. I am thankful to have her here with me. When the door opened I saw Jenna laughing at something Lucia is saying before she turns around and settling her eyes on me. Lucia smiled and mouth to me you'll be okay."Hey," I stood up abruptly and walk over to where she stood. "Can I have a moment with you?" I ask and look back and Mrs. Harrison gave me a reassuring smile. Taking a deep breath, I look back to face Jenna and nod my head yes to he
Mate or God? Chapter 32: Mate or God?
Jenna/Sr. ClaireThoughts flow in my head. I don't know what to do anymore. There is still a part of me who longs to stay here with my mate but then, there's another life I have as a human. Sometimes I feel like I am going crazy.After my Mother's Superior left, I stay inside my room and skipped dinner. Her words today made open my eyes and brought me back to Colby's question and now I didn't even get a good sleep as I am indecisive about what to do and who to choose. My thoughts keep going back and forth. I am conflicted as I look at the promising glover Shawn gave me over and over again before I pray again to God to show me the way by giving me a sign.After hours of wondering in the darkness of my world. Finally as if something dawned on me, I thought of a perfect way to solve all these doubts and unanswered questions I have. I get up right away on my feet. I know where to go to find my answers. I run out of the house and follow the trail that I used when I was running away. I ho
Mate or God? Chapter 31: Mother Superior
Jenna/Sr. ClaireOn the next day, I was sitting in my room meditating when my mother came inside unannounced. "I am sorry to interrupt you," she said. "Anything I can help you with?" She shook her head no and came to sit beside me. "I don't know if you still remember or even want to know it. Your sister has a pup. Ken, her mate took him away when Sophie died." I raise my brow. "Nephew?" I question and she nods her head yes. "I do visit them sometimes but ever since you came I haven't. Today I am going to see him at the Nightfall Pack and I just wanted to know if you want to come with me" I try to blink my eyes. This is another shocking news that I did not remember. Taking deep breaths I stood up and try to calm myself. When I am calm I said, "I want to see him if that's okay with you?" "Thank you Jenna" she raised her hand to touch me but I step back. I may have forgiven her but there is a boundary between us. She looked taken a back for a moment she look sad before she cover it
Mate or God? Chapter 30: Forgiven
Jenna/ Sr. ClaireTo forget is the hardest thing to do and that is why I don't forgive anyone easily. However, to see people that I used to despise work their way for forgiveness, my heart wavers. Shawn did live up to his promise and so did everyone else. After another month Shawn did earn my trust but not my heart. However, recently I am starting to feel it wavers for him. I have to be honest that every time I am with him I am smiling and happy. He didn't do anything to relive the unforgiveable past we had, rather he filled it with lights. Now I am conflicted between my feelings for him and my responsibilities as a nun. A woman who is already anointed to serve God. "Do you want more" Shawn said, pulling me out of my train of thoughts. I look up and see him wiggles his brow at the waffle on the spatula in his hand? I groan and rub my stomach. "No thanks, I am full," I said. He shook his head and place the waffle on an empty plate. "Morning uncle and aunty" I hear a cheerful voice
Mate or God? Chapter 29: Glover
Shawn"Dad where is mo- aunt Sr. Claire?" asked Hans. I know my son is struggling between his biological mother and Jenna. I've seen him with her and sometimes I may have caught him in his room, wishing for Jenna to be his mother. I don't want him to have false hope because my relationship with Jenna is still questionable. "Dad, where's aunt Claire," his question snap me back from my trance. When my son arrived home he wanted to meet Jenna but I told him that she was a bit busy. Now I can't lie to him anymore. This has been going on for days and I didn't want to disappoint him by telling truth. After all he is just a child. My child. "She's in her room. why?" I ask him. "I miss her," he sadly said to me. I look at him sadly remembering that I have to win Jenna's heart again. I smile at him and bend down to his level."Okay, why don't we surprise her for a day out" I suggest and Hans jumps to his feet in excitement. "Dad, let's get ready" he drags me to the shower. After we get re
Mate or God? Chapter 28: To Do List
Jenna/Sr. ClaireShawn left right after his promise, excusing himself that he has pack duties and I'm left with the kids. Despite that, we still enjoy our picnic even though it was kinda sad that Shawn missed out on the rest of the fun. Back to the pack house after our fun at the park. I sat in my room, thinking of his words before I get up and go to the shower. After a nice warm shower, I changed into a mid-knee floral 'skirt and a white tug-in blouse. I then put on pairs of white sneakers. I try to look for a pen and paper but I could not find it. I know one person I can get it from. Despite, not wanting to go but I have no option. I walk out of my room and head towards downstairs. I then turn right and made my way to Colby's office. When I reach it I knock on the door lightly. "Come in" I hear him from inside. The moment I open the door is the moment I regret coming here. Shawn, Hailey, and Hanna were all in Colby's office. They all look at me as if they saw a ghost. I clear my
Mate or God? Chapter 27: Going Crazy
Jenna/Sr. Claire"Forgive me, Lord." I kiss my cross tied to my necklace and place it in the top drawer. After another breakdown, I never bother to show my face at lunch or dinner. It is another day and I have been sitting here thinking of what to do until I made up my mind. And what I am going to do may sound crazy. However, for once I want to go crazy because I am going crazy of what had happened to me in the past. These people who claim to love, to know, and to say sorry to me are making me unstable again. I need to breathe. I need to live a little and just forget everything. I look at myself in the mirror once again. "This is it," I said to my reflection. Taking a deep breath I check my skinny jean, spaghetti top, and my two-inch heel. "It's time for Jenna to let loose" I mutter and grab my purse from the nightstand. I slowly close the door behind me and about to walk through the hallway way when a voice stops me. "You're going somewhere?" I turn to find Colby standing at the
